I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2008

25

Mar

Mila Jovovich Ruined By Pregnancy of the Day

I get lots of hate for making fun of pregnancy and saying things like it ruins perfectly alright vaginas and perfectly alright bodies and that’s why mothers really love their kids as much as they because they know they sacrificed any sex appeal they once had for this little fucker and their future consists of wiping snot off faces and dealing with whiney little brats crying because they didn’t get the video game console that all their friends got and all the other bullshit that comes with kids like making dinner for them and picking them up after soccer practice…

Either way, there was a time that Mila Jovovich was a decent import, I never loved her because she didn’t have tits and looked like a little Russian gymnast boy, but I know a lot of other people did. Well it turns out that her uterus now hangs over her belt like she was me only I’ve got bigger tits.

Posted in:Mila Jovovich|Pregnancy Body

2008

25

Mar

Emma B in a Bikini of the Day


Her name is Emma Balfour and I don’t know what she does. I feel like posting some pictures of girls in bikinis because I got nothing better to do todayand I figure all you virgins who email me telling me you use my site to jerk off, which by the way makes me feel uncomfortable, are lookin’ for something worth jerkin off to.

I know that I wouldn’t be getting off to this shit if my dick worked but that’s just because she looks like this drag queen I once did shots with at a club, you know long skinny legs from being a marathon runner on his spare time when he wasn’t wearing panties and retarded fake tits that look like bowling balls on a mini ass.

My theory is if you get off to this bitch, you pretty much are gay but I’m just basing it all on the balls she’s got stuffed in that bikini bottom, who knows maybe she just has a low hanging vagina.

Posted in:Ass|Bikini|Emma B

2008

25

Mar

Coco Poses With Her Tits of the Day

Nothing says you’ve made it as a Gangster Rapper turned actor like having the trashiest stripper lookin’ bitch with the fakest tits as your wife. It’s like there’s no way he could have pulled off dating a useless Coco type by just being a local drug dealer. He’s gone above an beyond that by becoming a millionaire but is still running after the same garbage pussy he would be if he never left the ghetto, maybe he’s just likes rockin’ the power position because he knows her fat tits can’t leave him since he’s given her a taste of the high life but it’s probably because he bought her off the black market when she was 14 and kept her in the basement cultivating her into what she is today with dance lessons and plastic surgeries like some kind of Frankenstein shit.

I guess there is such thing of an over achieving slut and the reality is that I am posting on her and not on my favorite slut Amber from down the street who always lets me stick a finger in her while gettin’ a private dance for an extra 5 dollars, even though I keep trying to explain to her that she should be the one paying me because in case you didn’t know, I got some magic fingers.

Posted in:Ass|Coco|Tits

2008

25

Mar

Charisma Carpenter has Tits of the Day

I never understood why virgins love the TV version of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. I realize there are girls on it who are worth fuckin’ and all that but I always seem to find girls worth fucking on every single TV show I’ve ever watched, whether it’s Oprah, Roseanne, Extreme Home Makeover or even an audience member on an infomercial for balding men scalp spray paint. I am not very picky. But this Buffy shit is so heavy it’s one of those shows that makes creepy dudes who can’t get real pussy feel like they are in emotional relationships with these bitches on their screens and that shit spills over into becoming rapists and website hackers who dis their girls.

I guess none of that matters, but here’s some Charisma Carpenter post Playboy and Buffy fame, rockin’ her tits at some event I didn’t bother remembering where because I am lazy….

Posted in:Charisma Carpenter|Tits

2008

25

Mar

Claudia Schiffer in GQ Lookin’ Hot of the Day

These pictures of Claudia Schiffer for GQ dropped recently and I didn’t post it yet because my server sucks. It’s no surprise that bitch looks good. I’ve written about her before saying that she’s got it going on for a mom of 3 in her 40s about to dry up in menopause and I stand by that. Then again you have to realize that I have never had much of an issue with mom’s in menopause because they always try harder and a little warming lube always gives the illusion that the vagina isn’t dead.

Posted in:Claudia Schiffer|GQ|Hot

2008

25

Mar

Cameron Diaz Buys Flowers of the Day

Here are some pictures of Cameron Diaz buying some flowers for herself because nobody loves her. I don’t actually know whether she’s got some cock or not right now, but I like it better when she doesn’t because I can laugh at her lonely middle aged self for being dumped by a young Justin Timberlake right when he was peaking with his last album. Unfortunately, she’s pretty hot and has a lot of money and that makes her better than anything I’ve ever fucked so here’s some pics of her not buying you flowers which is something you’re used to because your mom doesn’t even buy you presents for your birthday because she’s blocked your phone number even though you live in the basement, because she hate being reminded of how much of a loser you are…

Posted in:Ass|Cameron Diaz|Flowers

2008

25

Mar

Shannon Elizabeth is Dancing With the Stars of the Day

Since my images still don’t work 100 percent and since dancing is porn to me, here’s some Shannon Elizablth Dancing with the Stars who aren’t really stars, because if they were, they would be too busy getting real work that doin’ a quickstep on a shitty variety show. Either way, there was a time I got hard for her fake tits and I figure that out of respect to the death of her sex appeal, I should honor it by posting this is some shit. Kinda like that time we Weekend and Bernied my neighbor who had a drug overdose 2 days before we found him and we had to sit with his body until the coroner came to get it. It took about 10 hours, we were drunk and thought that the best way to honor him was by turning him into some kind of puppet and making him do funny puppet things. All it took was a little rope and a strong stomach because dude had a bit of a stink to him but it got a whole lot of laughs when we went to the other neighbors’ doors making him ask fora cup sugar.

Posted in:Dancing With the Stars|Lame|Shannon Elizabeth

2008

24

Mar

stepLINKS of the Day

I am having horrible problems with the fucking site. I don’t really know what’s going on but it may be the end of me. I talk to my host they don’t know what’s going on. I talk to the designer/coder and he doesn’t know what’s going on. I don’t know what’s going on. I just know that I can’t host pictures anymore and that kinda makes what I do useless….the good news is that I can still buy alcohol and drink it

Here are my links….

UPDATE – Images Work Again – I am Back..

Some Hot Ass Action
GO

Heavy Metal In Baghdad. I Know, Sounds Like an Oxy Moron, Right?
GO

How to Drink Your Beer on the Street Like I Do
GO

You Can Actually Wear Britney’s Clothes Instead of Putting on Those Panties You Found on the Street and Pretending You Are..
GO

Natasha Mealey Has Got Some Big Fucking Cans
GO

Seeing A Girl Naked for The First Time Will Probably Make You Piss Your Pants
GO

Do Yourself a Favor and Don’t Die a Virgin
GO

Bobby Billiard In Her Black Bikini. Say That 5 Times Fast Instead of Masturbating 5 Times Fast So Your Mom Don’t Catch You
GO

Myspace Weirdos That I Had a Good Laugh At
GO

If Heidi Montag is a Feminist Hero, then I am Skinny, Good Looking and Sober
GO

Yamila Rahn Si Makes ME Wish I Could Get an Erection
GO

And Now, The Grossest Story Ever, Courtesy of Amy Winehouse
GO

The Bitch Who Wrote Harry Potter Wanted to Kill Herself, or Something
GO

Oprah’s Dog is Dead. I’m Pretty Sure Stedman Killed It to get It’s Inheritance
GO

All It’s Official Penelope Cruz Will Never Be Your Girlfriend
GO

Pam Anderson is Looking Really Fuckin Rough
GO

Keep Your Dad Out of Your Porn Collection, Build a Motion Alarm
GO

For Those of Us Who Need a Little Help in the Morning
GO

I Don’t Know Much, But If There’s One Thing I Know, It’s Porn
GO

If Heidi Montag is a Feminist Hero, then I am Skinny, Good Looking and Sober
GO

I know You Said You’re Saving Yourself For Marriage, But I Think We Both Know That’s Not Going to Happen
GO

Go Gramma Go!!!
GO

Some Chick Bench Presses Another Chick
GO

Jello Pussy!!! It’s a Family Treat!
GO

Kylie’s Less Fasmoun Sister Danni in a Bikini. May Be Old, but Fuck You
GO

And Now, a Little Easter Celebration
GO

Make a Fake Pussy, Because I Know You’ll Never Touch a Real One
GO

Khloe Kardashian Goes to Some Party and Pretends People Care
GO

Here’s a Miget Dressed Up as Hilary Clinton
GO

Medicine Ball to the Face
GO

More Guitar Hero Fun
GO

Some Sexy Met Art Chicks
GO

Kevin Federline is Still Alive?
GO

Claudia Schiffer Sells Stuff With Her Body and Make Me Happy in the Process
GO

It’s Raining (John) McCain!
GO

The Simpsons South Park Intro
GO

Steve Carell is Gay
GO

FROM THE FORUM

Beatles Solo Albums
GO

Anyone Ever Tried The Spiderman?
GO

Tony Hawk Pro Skater 3
GO

X-Tina in Candyman
GO

Some Vanessa Hudgens Action
GO

He Says She’s The Best Looking Women, But I Don’t Know About That
GO

Hello Ruby KNox!
GO

What’s Your Fave Body Type
GO

Pollyanna Feels herself Cuz She Is a Perv
GO

Sabrina is a Slut
GO

Hot Stuff For You
GO

Rodrigo y Gabriela
GO

Sevendust Thread
GO

Counting Crows Thread
GO

Kool and the Gang
GO

Beyonce – Dangerously in Love
GO

Janet Jackson – Velvet Rope
GO

Paul Oakenfold – Global Underground New York
GO

Bananarama – Greatest Hits
GO

Dells are for porn Video
GO

Stupid Pics of Robin Meade
GO

Stupid Pic of Back Dimples
GO

Stupid Pic of Flintstone’s Viagra
GO

Download the Oxford Dictionary and Learn You Some Words
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS

2008

24

Mar

Miley Cyrus Goes to Church on Easter of the Day

Miley Cyrus goes to church on Easter and these are the pictures. I am not sure if the blonde chick is her mom, but I remember seeing her mom in an interview once and it made me want to see the Billy Ray sex tape…but the truth is that I’ve always wanted to see a Billy Ray sex tape. That Achy Breaky Heart tune really spoke to me and I feel the only way I can appreciate it is if I see him hate fuckin’ a bitch after she tells his Achy Breaky heart and it turns out that Billy Ray was right and it just doesn’t understand and does blow up and kill a man…all over her face….right before she wiped it off and put it in a jar in her fridge in the event her aspiring country singin’ lover ever accidentally hit big and that is the story of how Miley came about…

Either way, I wonder what god is going to think of this good little Disney Christian when he finds out that Miley found a loophole and let’s dudes fuck her up the ass because that way she can still technically keep her virginity until marriage since that’s what the church wants out of her. I am sure he’ll be a lot less disappointed that when she realizes that church is a lot less fun than fucking, doing coke and being a total cunt to the world while spending absurd amounts of money on useless shit while the rest of God’s people are dying of starvation.

Posted in:Church|Easter|Miley Cyrus

2008

24

Mar

Lindsay Lohan’s Lesbian Pizza Party of the Day

I was surprised to find out that lesbians ate pizza, I always thought they only ate pussy, but here is Lohan and her lesbian cock, Samantha Ronson on a pizza date, proving me wrong.

I always find it funny when the people I’ve known in my life have had to fuck off to rehab and they come back to the normal life and ask me out for a coffee because they don’t drink or do drugs anymore and coffee is their drug of choice. So I have to sit through hours of them spewing their self absorbed bullshit on me, like how they are changed and how they are never going to touch drugs again and how they realized in rehab that they really hated themselves and that is why they were self destructive and now they are working on a better happier life, while I know they are bullshit and 3 months or less later I run into them jacked on coke in a club talking about how they are cured and just dabble in the shit and 6 months later I get a call from them asking me for money, which is pretty fucking desperate because everyone knows I have no money, but I guess they’ve gone through all their other leads and are desperate and then a year later a get a call from a mutual friend telling me they are dead.

I am not saying that Lohan is back on the drugs, I am saying she was never off the drugs. She looks like the kind of girl who has a mother who fed her cocaine when she was 10 to keep a trim figure while staying energetic so that she could make more money for the family, she just went to rehab to save face and make the public and producers think she was making positive changes, while in reality she’s still a vagina lickin’ cokehead with too much money to ever stop and I think I love that kind of determination. Unfortunately, the lesbian cock she’s sockin’ is Samantha Ronson’s and that destroys any lesbian all the sex appeal from a potentially amazing video opportunity, if only another chick was cast for the part.

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|Pizza|Samantha Ronson