Lingerie Archives - Page 8 of 9 Archive - DrunkenStepFather.com

Archive for the Lingerie Category

2007

Aug

I am – Alena Seredova is 6 Month Pregnant Model on the Runway of the Day

Here are some pictures of model Alena Seredova modeling her underwear collection 6 months pregnant and full of milk. She is a Czech model and Czech girls are known for being pornstars so this bitch proves us right by showing us how fertile she is when dude dropped load in her 6 months ago…so off….

I remember one night when I was stuck in the rain and a car pulled up next to me and this Eastern European family offered me a lift. I thought it was fucking weird but I got in anyway because I was drunk and I wasn’t in the mood to get yet. The problem with not washing your clothes is that getting them wet brings out all the smells I tried so hard to cover-up.

Either way, the people seemed harmless,that was until I was sitting in the van and noticed they had about 5 kids in there all cramped in and the creepy glazed over eyes of the wife made me realize I was in over my head. The music started going and it was some freaky bible shit that they were all singing along to and that’s when I tried to get the fuck out of the car but they had used to child locks and I was locked in. They drove the complete opposite direction from where they said they would take me and at first I was trying to be polite about the whole thing and believed the asshole when he said he was lost. Then I started thinking that these psycho Christians wanted to either save me by kidnapping me and taking my drunken ass to their compound or they were going to eliminate me because I represented what they hated in the world or what Jesus hated in the world. I don’t know how I got out of the whole mess, I think I may have conspired with one of the girls who turned out was not even their kid but was someone they picked up too but I don’t really remember, because I don’t even know if this shit happened to me or if it was just a dream I had while wasted 10 years ago that I took for truth…But I survived…

Much like Alena Seredova’s baby will survive, not because she didn’t get an abortion but because she’s broken from the communist regime, has made money and will be able to feed it more than rationed meat and potatoes…and because she didn’t get an abortion…I don’t know what I am saying just click the fucking pictures asshole…

Related Posts:

Alena Seredova Getting Knocked Up on the Topless Beach
I am – Eva Herzigova Eastern European Upskirt
Petra Nemcova Makes Hearts With People in Turbans
Petra Nemcova and James Blunt Swim Together

2007

Aug

I am – Lily Allen Shops for Lingerie of the Day

7 Comments »

There are girls out there who I just don’t want to see get fucked and one of those girls is Lily Allen. I am usually up for seeing anything with a vagina getting down with whatever they get down with, naked or half naked, but sometimes a girl turns me off so much that I filter them out of my mind.

Lily Allen is one of those girls and I don’t know why. I am sure I have banged way uglier chicks than her, but for some reason, when I look at her, I just think of her as some kind of a-sexual beast. To me she’s built like a Barbie with no genitals at all, so seeing her at one of my favorite lingerie stores buying what I assume is sexy lingerie reminds me that bitch does have sex, that bitch does have a vagina and that underneath her oversized fat chick clothes is a girl who just wants to be sexy and I hate every second of it. Shit’s totally giving me a mind fuck so to make you feel my pain with me, I am posting these pictures.

Related Posts:

Lily Allen is Performing
Lily Allen is a Ditch Pig
Carmen Electra Shopping for Lingerie

Posted in:Lily Allen|Lingerie|Unsorted

2007

Aug

I am – Leelee Sobieski and Tricia Helfer in PVC of the Day

1 Comment »

LeeLee

After I lived with 1.5 legged Melanie in Community College, I roomed with the Queen Mother of fat sluts: picture Brooke Hogan plus 70 lbs and size A tits, crossed with Winnie the Pooh. Fucking Winnie the Pooh: she not only wore his face but covered her THREE QUARTERS of our room with Tigger and that shit. I think if I ever had a justifiable case for arsen, this would have been it, and no jury would convict me after meeting this bitch we’ll call “Cassie.”

Ahhh the cunt in Cassie. She would have three pretty hot guys over in one night for sloppy sex, sometimes they would be going as another was coming, and not seem to get it, or mind the other dude’s fresh wet spooge on her Pooh sheets. She wasn’t even getting paid, stupid bitch. She sex-xiled me constantly, which is fine because I had no desire to watch this slag come and fill the room with the smell of her fat steamy twat.

This borderline obese bitch reminded me that no matter how big and busted a chick is, she can nail a hot guy just by getting up in his face because guys are lazy. They don’t give a shit about the fatrolls hanging out of her backless shirt because the hot girl across the room = effort. Most will shove their cock in aggressive roadkill with tits as long as they don’t have to make the first move. What’s funny is that while they’re slamming fat Cassie’s size 18 ass in the bathroom stall, the hot girl from across the room is just as slutty and they could be pounding her if they had just got up and said “Hi, let’s fuck.” Joke’s on them. And the hot girl for being a pussy. And fat Cassie for simply being fat Cassie

Here is Leelee Sobieski in some PVC and fishnets not looking like fat Cassie, with the exception of the hair. The other chick is Tricia Helfer (Battlestar Galactica) who’s usually smoke’n, but she looks like she has about 20 years and 20 rounds of Botox on Sobieski here. Now have fun trying to bust one over the only photo I could find of this tame hooker/S&M shoot with the girl from “Eyes Wide Shut” and her aging aunt.

Obediently yours,
Sugar Nell (ex-hooker, friend of Jesus)

EMAIL ME HERE

Posted in:Leelee Sobiesky|Lingerie|Unsorted

2007

Jul

I am – Bianca Gasciogne Lingerie Pics of the Day

3 Comments »

Bianca Gasciogne

I ended up watching some movie on the weekend where some kid ends up with brain cancer at the end and dies and blah, blah, blah and everyone I was watching it with was really sad and all that bullshit while I just sat there not really feeling anything about it, because unlike my idiot friends, I donâ€™t get all upset when watching stories about fucking make believe. Itâ€™s called ACTING you fucking tards.

To make matters worse, it got all â€œthese are the things we need to do if we ever only have a short time to liveâ€? etc, which is fucking bullshit, because you shouldnâ€™t wait till you are fucking sick to do those things, you should fucking do them NOW.

Anyways, I was so annoyed with this god damned situation that I told them all if I get Cancer, Iâ€™m gonna sit in my bedroom and hate this world and everything in it. I wouldnâ€™t want any visitors or well wishers and no fucking Chemo either.. I wouldnâ€™t fight at all and would want that shit to kill me as fast as possible and would also smoke more cigarettes in hopes of accelerating the cancer, thereby killing me faster. They launched into the whole cancer isnâ€™t funny thing, and thatâ€™s when I made a break for it.

Hereâ€™s Bianca Gasciogne. Sheâ€™s the girl you would like to fuck if you had Cancer and only had a short time to live, cause you are a virgin and will use any excuse to get laid.

hugs and kisses
Marie-Eve Martinez

Related Posts

I am â€“ Joanna Krupa at a Lingerie Party of the Day
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I am â€“ Carmen Electra Shops for Lingerie of the Day
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I am â€“ Kate Moss Agent Provocateur Pics of the Day
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Posted in:Bianca Gascoigne|Lingerie|Tits|Unsorted

2007

Jul

I am – Gemma Atkinson Almost Naked of the Day

2 Comments »

Gemma Atkinson

I went on a date last night with this guy who seemed pretty nice when I met him but not really my type so to speak. He ended up taking me to this fucking frat boy bar where 90% of the kids have just moved out of their houses and are spending their parents money to get wasted and not get up for the college classes their parents also paid for.

So needless to say Iâ€™m stuck sitting between him and this other dude, listening them talk about college fucking football (of course) and, hating my life and wondering why I always end up with these fucking losers, and of course trying to think of a way to get out of this situation, because I hate jock fucks. The climax came when they asked me if I would be interested in letting them tag team me and got all bro-type-high-five-shit and like Iâ€™m not really into that because more often then not the dudes are closet gays more interested in seeing each other naked then me.

I ended up asking where the bathroom was and when I found it I noticed there was a door to the back alley of this place and before you could say beer bong, I was out of the place like a fucking bolt of lightning. I ended up going to some shitty bar down the street from my place and going home with some hott random dude to fuck all night , so all is well that ends well. I didn’t get his phone number or give him mine, and it’s probably better that way

Hereâ€™s Gemma Atkinson.

hugs and kisses
Marie-Eve Martinez

Related and Unrelated Posts

I am â€“ Gemma Atkinson in a Bikini of the Day
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I am â€“ Gemma Atkinson Bikini Pics of the Day
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I am â€“ Christina Milianâ€™s Boots of the Day
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Posted in:Gemma Atkinson|Lingerie|Tits|Unsorted

2007

Jul

I am – Model Belen Rodriguez of the Day

1 Comment »

Belen Rodriguez

When I was a hooker I had a client who had me tie his wrists with a long rope of braided hair, bind his dick so tight in dental floss it turned purple, and scratch his ball sack hard while I fucked him. Twice he payed extra to duck tape my tits. I was never really comfortable with the scratching part–the guy was a bleeder, and you know, AIDS is a bitch. But he was a huge tipper, always brought his own dental floss, so I just dipped my fingers in alcohol when it was done, then moved on to the next John.

The point is i don’t think you should scratch or be scratched by anyone unless you have seen the printout of their AIDS/Hep test, even if its hard to get diseased that way. Unless they are paying you. I am no doctor, just a dumb slut with a bigger fear of blood than semen.

But you freaks would sell your kidney for the chance to scratch or be scratched by this slut until you came, even if she told you she was a walking flesh-bag of HIV. Meet Belen Rodriguez in Italian Pocketbook Magazine. Get out some Kleenex, you’ll need it.

Obediently yours,

Sugar Nell (ex-hooker, friend of Jesus)

EMAIL ME HERE

Related Posts

I am â€“ Americaâ€™s Next Top Models Get Naked of the Day
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I am â€“ Janice Dickinson Pantyhose Upskirt of the Day
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I am â€“ Godâ€™s Girls at a Party of the Day
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Posted in:Lingerie|Model|Unsorted

2007

Jul

I am – Rocio Diaz in Pronto Magazine of the Day

2 Comments »

Rocia Diaz

I had to walk home through the park last Wednesday because I lost my week-long bus pass and my wallet said no to a new one, so fuck you bus. It had just rained and was hot as balls. The park was deserted, except for what i took at first to be a homeless guy lying on this big rock at the edge of the pond. This was an odd place for a nap, since he was basically in the water, which is covered in a 5 inch layer of green sludge that smells like mother nature’s moldy wadge, and even the homeless have standards. So then I am thinking maybe it’s a dead body, how exciting! I step in for a closer look, then realize its some sort of dirty hipster couple making out… making out in a huge puddle of rotting forrest and duck shit.

Here is Rocio Diaz in Pronto magazine, dressing as an 80s stripper. I have no idea who she is and I don’t read Spanish so well, but she looks like the kind of girl who would be down for some heavy-petting in a lake of sewage if you got her drunk enough. Your virgin loins are about to get dirty.

Obediently yours,

Sugar Nell (ex-hooker, friend of Jesus)

EMAIL ME HERE

Related Posts

I am â€“ Jade Goody Nipples of the Day
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I am â€“ Mila Kunis wears Short Shorts of the Day
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I am â€“ CoCo Showing Off Her Tits Again of the Day
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Posted in:Ass|Lingerie|Unsorted

2007

Jun

I am – Joanna Krupa at a Lingerie Party of the Day

1 Comment »

You probably don’t know who this bitch is, actually you’re one of those internet weirdos who just constantly looks at pictures of semi famous girls posing with their big old tits, so you probably have every picture ever taken of her on your hard drive, and that is probably one of the reasons why you can’t get laid. Either way, Krupa is at some lingerie party and she isn’t wearing the kind of lingerie I want to see. I am more into something a little more revealing with a little more skin, not something that doubles as a fucking party dress, but I guess that’s asking too much out of a slut who made her career showing off her fat tits.

I like concept parties. I think panty parties, lingerie parties, pool parties, beach parties, group sex parties are all things I’d like to do. I always wanted to throw parties, but realize that it will cost way too much money, too much time and too much organization that I don’t have the ability to do. Some of the concept parties I’ve had are drinking and driving party to see how many of us get home alive and not arrested as a protest to all these drive safe ads. I also thought about having an amateur stripper party, a nudist party where you check your clothes at the door and I guess those are all I’ve come up with so far.

I am not even going to talk about her gay black accessory because gay black guys are a whole other fucking topic that I don’t I want to get into because we all know black dudes are supposed to be hip hop not taking it in the butt.

Posted in:Joanna Krupa|Lingerie|Tits|Unsorted

2007

Jun

I am – Joanna Krupa in Lingerie at the SpikeTV Guy Awards of the Day

1 Comment »

I don’t give a fuck about Spike TV. I don’t give a fuck about their shitty guy awards because I find that whole Men’s Market massively fucking gay and creating a Guy Awards isn’t empowering to men, it makes us look like a bunch of fucking cunts. Men aren’t supposed to care about awards we’re supposed to be too busy providing for our families.

This men’s market must be targeting 14 year old boys. It’s all about hot chicks you’ll never bang because they don’t like guys who watch shit like Spike TV. It’s also about cars, machines, sports, sex and UFC and it’s kinda insulting to me that they think guys are supposed to be into all that shit.

I assume that some of your faggots like to get drunk with your buddies and watch this shit while giving each other high fives and maybe even betting on who is going to win and the loser has to do something emasculating like wear women’s panties for a month or even let you and all your other friends jerk off on his face because it’s not gay when it’s about losing a bet or some shit.

Either way, I do give a fuck about hot girls wearing lingerie as party dresses and this is Joanna Krupa from Poland at the Spike TV Guys choice awards lookin’ pretty alright. She was the hired pussy to try to make the party less of a sausage fest. I always thought Polish people were into training circus bears to balance on balls, I guess I was wrong. I guess this isn’t really lingerie, but if you saw what my wife wears to look sexy you’d understand why I consider this shit lingerie, fuck yourself.

Posted in:Joanna Krupa|Lingerie|Tits|Unsorted

2007

May

I am – Rihanna Performs in a Sexy Latex Outfit of the Day

1 Comment »

If I knew concerts were like stripclubs, I would have saved my lap dance budget for tickets to this show. Rhianna is looking pretty fucking tight bodied in this getup and the fact that I can’t grab her tits for 10 dollars is the reason why I will never bite into my lap dance budget….

I will say that everyone gives her a hard time for having a big forehead and lookin’ like an alien and shit, but when a girl dresses like this, her forehead is probably the last thing I am looking at. I am the kind of guy who girls love because I never look them in the eyes when I talk to them, I go straight for the tits because I figure there is reason to pretend I care what they are saying and I like to stick to the point of our conversation…I guess that’s why I don’t have any girl friends.

I remember a time before being married when I would try to get laid. I was never good at romance. I was the kind of guy who would just try to grab at her box when I had an opening or when she was least expecting it, mainly because if a girl wanted my dick, I’d expect her to just grab at it to give me the green light. That move never really worked and is probably why I always stuck to hookers, they were a lot less work and I didn’t have to tell them what they wanted to hear. All I had to do was give them the money they wanted and they’d let me grab at them as much as my money allowed for.

Enough of my stupid story of how I have shitty game, look at these pics of Rhianna giving me something I want and that’s a mainstream latex show for all the young girls who will be taking her lead in 5 to 10 years making the world a happier fucking place….