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Archive for the Naked Category

2009

10

Aug

Ashley Greene Naked Pictures Tainted By Perez of the Day

[IMAGES REMOVED CUZ SHIT IS THE LAW SON]

I don’t watch Twilight or fall into the whole trap because I have better things to do, so I don’t know who Ashley Greene is, but assume she is Brian Austin Greene’s daughter and now she’s showing off her swollen pussy in some webcam pics, cuz every girl takes naked pictures of herself, whether it’s to check themselves out or seduce random dudes they are dating without thinking that dude will pass that shit around, especially when bitch is famous, or even if it’s for a publicity stunt and the whole thing is pretty alright, except that Perez had to turn it fuckin’ gay…

Posted in:Ashley Greene|Naked

2009

03

Jul

Girls Please Learn from this Dude of the Day

I hate the fact that everytime someone loses their shit and strip naked, whether it is a homeless person, a drunk or high person, or someone totally mentally unstable they always have a fuckin’ dick. It was a dude who I once say naked on a pool table with a pool cue in his ass, it was a dude I saw on the side of the street high on MDMA jerking his dick, it was a dude who I say passed out naked on a park bench covered in what looked like chocolate syrup, and it is NEVER fuckin’ girls. No matter how insane a bitch is, no matter how fucked up and high she is, I have never seen a girl voluntarily throw off her clothes, it’s always taken negotiations on my part to get a little pussy flash, and I’d love if just once, while sitting on a bus, on a fuckin’ plane, on a fuckin’ train or even in a fuckin’ horsedrawn carriage, a chick would start stripping and screaming and running back and fuckin’ forth, pussy and tits out in the motherfuckin open like this dude who did it on some United Airways flight….who got restrained by two off duty cops, who I hear thought this was the high point of their careers….who later got arrested, but Ladies, do not let that stop you!!! Please.

Posted in:Crazy Man|Naked|Plane

2009

10

Jun

Gisele’s Naked Body Tattooed in a Magazine of the Day

The only thing more disgusting than one of those inked up alternative models naked and pierced and tattooed for guys who have no standards because those whores have no business being naked, but only have business being whores, because whores don’t have to be hot, they just have to get naked for sites like suicide girls, is supermodels who look like dudes naked and pretending to be tattooed.

Posted in:Gisele Bundchen|Naked|Tattoo

2009

03

Jun

Miranda Kerr Naked in Rolling Stone of the Day

I fell in love with a model the other day. She was working inside some trendy restaurant, while I was sitting outside trying to get people to give me their doggy bags, without realizing that 99% of people don’t leave trendy restaurants with leftovers, I guess it’s frowned upon.

I guess this tall, model lookin bitch who was probably working as a waitress in Canada because she lacked confidence and thought she wasn’t good enough to move to LA or NYC to become professional, kept coming outside for a cigarette and I figured I’d chat her up, knowing she had no self esteem despite having an amazing body, unfortunately, she didn’t have low enough self esteem to acknowledge me. I just kept trying to chat her up and she just kept lookin the other way. I feel like Miranda Kerr would probably do the same and here she is in some pics for Rolling Stone, wearing nothing but bush.

Here is Miranda Kerr Ringing a Bell at some Promo Event the other day…

Posted in:Miranda Kerr|Naked|Rolling Stone

2009

07

May

Naked Models for Israel of the Day

I got this press release:

Artists 4 Israel is a community of creative individuals working together in on going collaborative projects expressing Israel’s right to exist in safety and security. The event is called (S)kin. (S)kin is a monthly, meaningful life drawing class. Each month a different theme highlighting Israel’s beauty and diversity is represented by the nude models and each class is led by a different, distinguished artist.

I am not a big supporter of any causes, I have no passion for much and no interest in anything and I know that I can’t make a difference so I don’t bother. So whether people are coming together for Jews, for Cancer, for Sri Lanka, for Palestine, for animal cruelty, for sweatshops, or for pretty much anything, I just laugh at the idiots and move on.

However, I do like tricking girls to naked and sometimes you need to pretend it is for a cause, because you’ve already tried the “art project” line, or the promises of making them famous line one too many times, so I felt I’d post this.

Sure the girls in the pictures are not hot, but they are naked and remember this is for a Jewish event so I am sure they were a good deal.

Posted in:Israel|Models|Naked

2009

21

Apr

Richard Branson and his Naked Girlfriend of the Day

You don’t need to be a billionaire to get a naked chick hanging off you while you kiteboard, you just have to be me, not that I kiteboard or get naked chicks hanging off me, but I could, I just need to go to Vietnam or Thailand, where 20 US dollars gets me 3 naked girls climbing up me like I was a junglegym, and by 3 naked girls I mean 10 year old boys.

Either way, here’s Branson with his girlfriend Denni “Michael J. Fox” Parkinson naked for a photoshoot from god fuckin’ knows where, to remind you that his life is amazing and yours is not. Enjoy….

Posted in:Denni Parkinson|Naked|Richard Branson

2009

20

Apr

Jessica Biel Naked in Her Movie of the Day

Jessica Biel gets topless for her new movie where she plays a stripper, that is usually a move an actor takes when they are peaking and by peaking I mean on drugs because their careers have nose-dived and they are trying to hold on for their lives. You know a desperate.

Sure, everyone hates on her for being manly and hard bodied, but call me easy, she’s topless and I’m sold, penis in those sheer full back panties or in Justin Timberlakes ass or not. I don’t care, I’m just pissed that she’s rockin’those panties, because nothing pisses me off than going to a stripclub and the bitch on stage doesn’t get fully naked until the last 20 seconds of her second show because she thinks she’s better than stripping even though it pays her and her deadbeat boyfriend’s bills. Cunt.

Posted in:Jessica Biel|Movie|Naked

2009

24

Mar

Cindy Crawford Lathered Up for Allure of the Day

I hung out with Cindy Crawford once, you know in the 90s when she was at the top of her game and I was one of the biggest fashion photographers in the industry, we had a little falling out when I told her to spread that pussy wider, when she was trying to be wholesome and all American and totally against spread eagle pussy shots and she got me kicked out of the industry because she’s just that powerful and my life has been on a downward spiral ever since.

Sure, that story was a total lie, but what difference does it make, it’s the fucking internet, I did see Cindy Crawford a few months ago when she was promoting some shitty furniture line at some discount furniture store, and she was pretty fucking amazing looking, the kind of girl who I should have run up to with my point and shoot camera and ask to spread that pussy wider, only to get escorted out by security, but I didn’t.

I did go to some weird strip club this weekened, where some slow, older stripper in costume got naked and soaped herself on stage, seems a little ambitious for a whore who makes her money when she charges people to grab her tits, but I guess I appreciated the effort.

Here are those allure pics, they hit the internet yesterday, I was napping….

Posted in:Allure|Cindy Crawford|Naked

2009

18

Mar

PETA Pulls Another Stupid Naked Stunt of the Day

PETA always manages to piss me off, because they do these great naked stunts, but the people doing them are always hairy hippie bitches with sloppy fucking bodies who make me want to go out and stop testing my cosmetic line on animals, just to make them put some fuckin’ clothes back on. At least today they kept their underwear on, because these pregnant lookin’ vaginas have already seen enough of the fuckin’ world, and should be underwraps. At least PETA calls them out for what they are…Pigs.

Posted in:Naked|PETA|Stunt

2009

18

Mar

Angela Lindvall is Naked in Purple Revisited of the Day

I have been emailed hundreds of times (once) by random fucking people (person) about these pictures of Angela Lindvall naked in some fashion magazine.

Since I’m pretty up to date on chicks getting naked I knew that these were fuckin’ old and that I had already Posted Them , a year ago, when they actually fucking hit.

But since you were so fucking eager to annoy me with your requests I’ve gone to the fucking trouble to show you that it’s time to get the fuck out of past and start living your life like you were Rihanna.

Here’s another post about Supermodels With Bush from the archives….

Posted in:Angela Lindvall|Naked|Purple