SFW Archives - Page 1088 of 1171 Archive - DrunkenStepFather.com

2015

01

Sep

Britney Spears Toe Sucker of the Day

Apparently, Britney Spears is saying “Men Frankly, Can Suck My Fucking Toe”….

But that’s not what I’m hearing…

Maybe it has something to do with having looped in 10,000 times, that it has become just weird distorted noise, that has sucked me into some wormhole, that is hypnotizing me into what I assume is a catatonic state, maybe this is what her family uses on her when they Josie and the Pussy cant us with her music, while keeping her medicated and confuses…seriously, whatever this vortex is, it’s therapeutic but I guess Britney talking about sucking or being sucked…brings me pleasure…all these years after being taken advantage of and still being taken advantage of, mid 30s mom in lingerie…

I’m just amazed she managed to formulate words and that her mic was on….

Now If only she was saying “I want you to cum inside me and forever be taken care of like I was your mommy”…..

That’s more my fetish these days..You see Britney needs saving but she’s rich, I actually need saving…cuz I’m not…

Either way, it’s safe to assume this is Britney Crying for help…

Here she is being a mermaid..

Posted in:Britney Spears|SFW

2015

01

Sep

Jessica Alba’s Whoring Herself Out for Socks Now of the Day

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Jessica Alba is the fake CEO or president or whatever of some massive billion dollar company called Honest, that she is slated to make 200 million dollars from when it goes public, which doesn’t include all the money she’s made up until this point, or any of the other ventures she has put money into that are less publicized, or really any of the money that Honest has paid her as a salary to show up everyday and pretend to work…

So what I’m saying is that Jessica ALba is already richer than God, but not quite as rich as Zuckerberg or the other dot com billionaires, however…she’s still peddling bullshit products as ad campaigns that make her look like a cheap, desperate instagram model…whether it is for coconut water or her Husband’s sock company, the whole this is ghetto bullshit, nor matter how much money she makes off it, she’s already got a ton of fucking money…

She can’t be doing this for money…but then what is she doing it for…

SFW
I think we should boycot Jessica Alba and her greedy money grubbing…so unfollow her now…thanks..

Now you can all laugh at my zero impact approach to life as I haven’t won one person over to actually take a stance with me…

I’d be a terrible cult leader, but ALba…that bitch is good…

Posted in:Jessica Alba|SFW

2015

31

Aug

Lindsay Lohan Dancing in a Bikini on a Yacht of the Day

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This pretty much completes my life….

It’s just so many issues bundled into one crazy girl, showing off her dance routine she learned as a kid when her parents whored her out to the industry…because..when normal drunk, medicated addicts dance like this, I usually just assume they are having a good time or trying to make money for a purse or to feed their babies as a stripper….but when Lohan does it..it’s dark…and incredible….I just wish that yacht deck she’s grinding for rich guys was my face.

I want to taste everything that well traveled, terribly aged, like a moldy cheesy pussy has to offer…

That said, in 2008, I was in a hotel room with Lohan, wasted at 3 or 4 in the morning and she was dancing like a stripper, slapping the floor and looking amazing…not quite as good as this..but close…and that disturbing image has been something i haven never been able to recreate with hookers, but wish I fucking could…but this is close…because people don’t change…especially when it comes to dance dance dance…

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|SFW

2015

31

Aug

Tyga Takes Advantage of his Broken Tween Girlfriend by Casting Her in a Shitty Video of the Day

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I wouldn’t really call this a genius move, but it’s definitely an obvious one…

Keep in mind this is totally irrelevant in the grand scheme of the world…almost as irrelevant as Bobo buying 2.3 percent of Facebook in 2009 that is now worth 1 billion dollars….because that’s what philathropy is about….and not nearly as important as the Lindsay Lohan dancing on a yacht like a stripper, something I’ve experienced first hand in a hotel room in 2008, but it still makes me laugh that dude, instead of going to jail as a sex offender, has been able to openly admit he fucked teen Kylie because her parents were no where to be found, and not just because her dad was in disguise on some Mrs DOubtfire shit….but because they are garbage into themselves…but she’s got a huge fucking following, people are talking so do the whole “first” love manipulation and cast her in your bullshit, because it gets her some visibility, breaking free from her sisters who made her tranny like her daddy face relevant…

ALl while getting him free talent and views so people can now know one of Tyga’s songs when asked, because before today anyone, even hip hop fans couldn’t place anything motherfuker did…other than Kylie…

Either way, manipulate broken young girls pretending it is love and win…that’s the Tyga lesson of the day

Posted in:SFW|Tyga

2015

31

Aug

Rita Ora’s Star Pasties of the Day

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Rihanna Part 2…or Rihanna Back-Up…or Rihanna’s Busty Body Double…or Rihanna Impersonator who will call you racist for comparing her to Rihanna, because she aspires to be Rihanna, but in breaking free from being seen as a Back-Up Rihanna, in case Rihanna dies of a drug overdose, like most people, needs to use racism to get out of being seen as Rihann, even though Rihanna sees her trying to be Rihanna too, it’s just that obvious….

She goes by Rita Ora…which rhyles with Rihanna, if said fast enough, and I guess it’s just part of her marketing, like fucking producers, label people, and wearing pasties under underwear, since her tits…these tits…are a huge part of her campaign….

But that fact though…seriously…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

TO See her LEaving the Club CLICK HERE

Posted in:Rita Ora|SFW

2015

31

Aug

Gigi Hadid in a Bikini for Instagram of the Day

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Spoiled, overrated, model because her mom was a model and her dad still fucks models her age, Gigi Hadid, is one of the most aggressively marketed creatures with little to no talent, but with money and egotistical parents that want to be the next Kardashians, thanks to being vapid idiots, so they throw that money and PR people, who can manipulate the media and that can create an instagram following using her LA rich kid access, that can create a modeling career, since modeling is a joke – photographers will shoot anyone and magazines will feature anyone…as long as they have an audience…advertisers like audiences…

Well now she’s dating virgin, who isn’t a virgin, but pretended to be cuz it got him more pussy, Jonas brother…

But more importantly, posting these kinds of pics to the internet…bikini selfie porn…

The more entertaining thing about Gig Hadid, is that her sister got jealous, like all rich kid sisters, and is raining on her parade….stealing her job and contacts…to have her own career…with Victoria’s Secret…because that’s what bratty whining gets you…

Posted in:Gigi Hadid|SFW

2015

31

Aug

Taylor Swift Sex Scene in New Video of the Day

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I don’t know when Taylor Swift decided she was Lana Del Rey…but I guess being a hack, pandering to the most basic emotions in teen girls, with simplistic garbage songs that have made her the most powerful act in Hollywood, the kind of non threatening, basic, act that all of Hollywood, who aren’t as confident in themselves as she is, are flocking to, because they want a bit of that glory, you know like having dinner with God…only in this case god is a highly marketed, singer/songwriter, who just made accessible content and won…

Now, like Miley dropping an album about her dead fish as soon as the VMAs ended, Taylor Swift dropped this video, where the proceeds go to animal conservation thanks to her being rich as fuck and not needing money…also a great marketing angle to get people to watch and to get producers to cast her in serious hollywood movies, which we know they are already in talks about, and the highlight was the PG-13 sex scene…a little make out session like Taylor has every night of the week with different dudes because that’s her thing…

Posted in:SFW|Taylor Swift

2015

31

Aug

Chloe Moretz in a Short Skirt of the Day

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Chloe Mortez….blah blah blah..jail bait…

Blah blah blah….was in a nerd movie as an action figure…blah blah blah…which made nerds like her…blah blah blah…more than they should like a 14 year old…we’re talking Jared from Subway level of like…well…blah blah blah…she’s 18 and on set in a mini skirt…

WHO FUCKING CARES…why do I post this shit…I hate myself for participating in this, and I hate you, one reader, my only reader, for makig me do this everyday instead of getting a real job, like working as a greeter at Walmart or something as rewarding as when I worked in an old folks home changing old diaper..because dying people shit..is one of the worst smells possible…but better than this…I’vebeen there. I know.

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Chloe Mortez|SFW

2015

31

Aug

Victoria Justice Bikini Snapchat of the Day

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Perverts everywhere love Victoria Justice.

She’s catering to them by posting a picture of her in a bikini to snap chat…

Because why else would she be posting pictures of her in a bikini…

FOr her teen girls fan, to be like “hey girls, i have a bikini, check it out,it’s so cute, let’s compare vaginas and scissor…OMG so fun.”…

Fuck off, you’re a softcore, very softcore pornographer and this is what you do to get dudes to jerk off to you…

Victorialicious, another Disney slut, trained by Disney to give dads forced to watch shitty TV, to keep watching shitty TV..with their kids as they all get brain washed…

She apparently did some sort of talk show…in white..that involved getting into a car for you to look at her ass you creeper

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:SFW|Victoria Justice

2015

31

Aug

Sarah Harding in a Solid Outfit of the Day

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Sarah Harding is some 40 year old popstar who has had what looks like some really hard living…since her UK pop band Girls Aloud in the 90s disbanded and created the amazing an hot Cheryl Cole…while I guess shitting out this one….

Over the years she’s had a series of bikinis, panty flashes, etc…I’ve posted on her before HERE

Not that I care about Sarah Harding, or what she’s up to, or even about any of these idiots, but I’ve been updating this shit for 11 years and I’ve stumbled across these iditos before..

That said, on this comeback tour she’s wearing a Cat Suit and her face is so fucking haggard, I barely even notice what must be a massive cameltoe, bot a product of the low level celebrity slut…party…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Sarah Harding|SFW

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