SFW Archives - Page 1139 of 1171 Archive - DrunkenStepFather.com

2015

26

Jun

Jessica Simpson’s an Old Lady with Hard Nipples of the Day

Jessica Simpson Big Tits…Thick Legs…why not celebrate girls who get multi-million dollar contracts to lose weight and pretend a weightloss program actually works, after gaining a ton of weight after singing that contract, instead of losing that weight…

Only, she eventually strapped down to hire a chef and training to get to this level of very strong looking legs….because I guess she didn’t want to pay out…

This was all while not losing her tits…tits that used to mean something…

Now they were an old, washed up and belong to a mom…..with a lot of fucking money…that don’t need to work ever again…but who at one time was like a Kardashian with a reality show.

But still tits…with hard nipples…as tits tend to do…

I am glad she’s not covering her tits like the girl at the grocery store was earlier today, I just didn’t understand how girls are still shy about hard nipples in the heat-to-air-conditioning…struggles of the summer…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Jessica Simpson|SFW

2015

26

Jun

Selena Gomez Humping a Chair of the Day

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Selena Gomez girl who is not my girl….but who is getting sluttier in her approach to sell shitty music…when she’s not sucking up to her counterparts like Taylor Swift, learning how to brain wash the public better…while not being quite as trashy as Miley…

I didn’t watch the video, if I did, it would be on mute, I just saw it getting passed around the internet and I would hate to miss out on stupid news that is hardly news, but rather me promoting some unappreciative cunt, that even if I send 2 views to her shitty video she doesn’t deserve as she’s never done shit for me…

This is a one sided relationship Selena…step it the fuck up…

Posted in:Selena Gomez|SFW

2015

26

Jun

Bella Thorne 17 and Half Naked in MTV Scream of the Day

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Bella Thorne’s great young ass that is making moves, getting famous, even though she’s a redhead and should be left out in the woods to fend for herself, because redheads are scary and clearly the devil’s work…

She’s stil l7, but on the who the fuck cares, let’s get her in a bikini, because 17 year olds get in bikinis, and we’re MTV and not exploitive of anyone, except maybe everyone who has ever been on Real World, Jersey Shore, and the Teen Pregnancy show…

17 is legal in Canada, but I don’t fuck with that, but I can still appreciate a lean, fit body…that I have a feeling will stay lean and fit and not just because I’ve been in the same place as Bella Thorne and she locked eyes and smiled at me…unless that was Carrot Top…I have facial recognition blindness…

I think I just appreciate any girl with a stage parent who sold her kids off to Disney, because I like saving people..

Here’s the trailer 7 Minute trailer of MTV’s Scream, that I guess is a remake of Scream for the new Generation, instead of just having the new Generation watch Scream, they wouldn’t get it with the whole land line and no cell phone situation….becasue they are morons..and so is Hollywood for not producing original fucking things…it’s like it has turned Broadway or high school theater…we don’t need to see Cat on a Hot Tin Roof, or RENT, or West Side Story, or Phantom of the Opera, whatever the fuck every school makes you watch, again….

But I guess, what matters is gratuitous bikini action…..with a 17 year old they pay to get half naked….

It seems so wrong when you position it like that…but her mom signed the waiver when collection the check, so I guess it’s ok…even better than ok…it’s amazing..and shes amazing…

Posted in:Bella Thorne|SFW

2015

26

Jun

Julianne Hough in Women’s Health of the Day

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If you’re wondering how Julianne Hough stays healthy, you don’t have to read Women’s Health, because I have the inside scoop right here…

It’s a mix of slutty stripper dancing for rich men, until they notice her, and want to fuck her so bad, you know dancers and their bodies and the way they move can be hypnotic, and cost you a lot of money per song, for many songs, after they trick you into sticking in the booth…….

Only in her situation, she trick them into committing to her through the cocktease hip gyrating, so that she can be presented as the girlfriend in the media, which is great for business and career….and also justification for the cocaine fueled anal sex nights you know they had….

So dance, cocaine, rich men, repeat…and here she is having some bootleg photoshoot for some bootleg magazine, because she’s bootleg…

Posted in:Julianne Hough|SFW

2015

26

Jun

Hunter Haley King Takes her Tits Skydiving of the Day

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Hunter Haley King is a 21 year old Soap Star, who went sky diving with her tits…and you know that she’s obviously someone celebrated for her tits, like a Kate Upton, or all the other famous tits before her, why else would she wear a cleavage shirt, knowing very well she was going to be going out against the G-Force of free-falling….it’s a set up…that I can appreciate…but not as much as the weirdos who probably know who she is because they jerk off to her tits, as they watch Soap Operas she is on, you know white trash, welfare, on disability, weirdo shutins in their 40s, so sad that they turn to that low budget shit, up on the closest thing to porn without the actual fucking their is on tv…

Posted in:Hunter Haley King|SFW

2015

26

Jun

Alaina Huffman Bikini Ass of the DayAlaina Huffman Bikini Ass of the Day

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Alaina Huffman is a Canadian actress I’ve never met, even though there are only a couple hundred people in Canada, who all get together a plot the maple syrup takeover, in our igloos, while riding polar bears….and eating beaver….

But if I knew she had a fat womanly ass, I would have probably made more effort….but it’s too late now, she’s got a job, doesn’t live on the streets, and is too fancy for me in places that require bikinis, that aren’t strip clubs…

I guess her big fat ass is just another example of my failures…

Posted in:Alaina Huffman|SFW

2015

26

Jun

Bar Refaeli in a Bikini of the Day

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Bar Refaeli posted a picture of her in a bikini…

She was a bikini model, still has a great body, but bores the fuck out of me now that she’s moved back to Israel to own a restaurant, own a bikini line, and just sit on her pile of hebrew money…in her model retirement…

I was more into her fucking A-Listers, cocaine raers, and not being some engaged, soon to be married, soon to be a mom….there’s nothing more disgusting than a model turning 30, except maybe her dropping kids…rippping out her vagina…that’s probably already ripped out but this time from the inside out…

Posted in:Bar Refaeli|SFW

2015

26

Jun

Britt Maren Has No Nipples for Nasty Gal of the DAy

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I have no real gossip or shit to talk on Britt Maren…I don’t even know who she is…

The only thing I do know…is that she’s got no nipples..

I am not sure if it is a birth defect, or if it is a product of cancer treatment, or maybe she pulled the Angelina Jolie and opted to get her nipples chopped off because they were either weird, long, inverted, and the Barbie Doll look is better for business, especially if she’s older than the free the nipple movement, where nipples had be censored….because clearly nasty gal is progressive as one of the biggest online retailers, and they’d never censor nipples to appease the Christians…because on the internet…magic happens…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Britt Maren|SFW

2015

26

Jun

Rosie Huntington-Whitely Workout of the Day

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A video posted by Rosie Huntington-Whiteley (@rosiehw) on Jun 24, 2015 at 12:02pm PDT

Rosie Huntington-Whitely posted some fitness humping the air like a horny girl on MDMA trying to have an orgasm to the bass of the music at the rave…because she’s a model and I guess now she’s trying to be a fitness model, even though she looks like the kind of girl who is more of getting her calories from wine and cocaine…because I guess she’s scaled back on the party and focused on the good life…now that she’s pushing 100 fucking year old….but you can still masturbate to her…

Posted in:Rosie Huntington-Whitely|SFW

2015

26

Jun

Stella Hudgen’s Hard Nipple and Thick Legs of the Day

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Stella Hudgens was Vanessa Hudgen’s busty sister, who is no longer a slutty tween in her sister’s shadow, but now a big girl of her own…literally..

Embracing the hormones in the food, and the generation of eaters and obesity rates at their peack…growing into her young period getting tits….all while rocking skimpy fucking clothes…because when you’re an exhibitionist, attention seeking, girl…you don’t let a little weight gain get in the way…

Especially not in this hip hop generation, thick is good, even though this body in my era of health and fitness levels would be consider obese…but now that everyone is fat, this obesity is the kind I wouldn’t mind on my face…because thick girls are fun to fuck..

Posted in:SFW|Stella Hudgens

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