Unsorted Archives - Page 145 of 511 Archive - DrunkenStepFather.com

2007

14

May

I am – stepLINKS of the Day

I went to the synagogue today because a friend offered me 20 dollars to help him pick up some props from a wedding that went on last night. My friend works for some event company that rents out shit like tables and chairs and other things that the Jewish people of the world use to make their synagogue wedding unique. We couldn’t get in the front door so we tried sneaking in the garage where we were confronted by some Jewish wife with a can of mace who thought we were out to rob her or some shit. Once my friend sorted it all out, we ended up inside to witness girls trying on clothes for a Jewish fashion show and a couple of young Jewish soon to be wives planning weddings of their own…It was all a very spiritual experience….what did you do today? I hope it involved clicking on my links….

Nick Lachey and Vanessa Manillo On the Beach…in Bathing Suits…Being Boring
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The Pussycat Doll Bitch on the Beach in a Bikini – I think I linked this already
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Cameron Diaz Slutty At The Beach
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Vote for FHM’s Digital Darlings Competition, Because Hot Chicks on the Internet Are Accessible…and Accessible Means You Can Sexually Harass them on Myspace…
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Sarah Silverman Posing in Maxim
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Vanessa Lorenzo Photoshoot Video
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Some Kid Let’s His Dog Hump Him Cuz He’s a Pervert
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Gisele Buying a Used Lamp Cuz She’s Cheap
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Old Ladies Fight Video
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Christina Aguilera in Italian Vogue
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Crazy Japanese Wrestling
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Christina Aguilera and the Mother She Will Look Like in 20 Years….Together…
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Kim Wilde is the Perfect Girl Video
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Scottish Guards Get Drunk and Let it all Hang Out
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Chick Fight in the Driveway
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Jessica Simpson Rockin’ Out Hard at a Club
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Mary Kate Olsen’s Idea of a Sexy Rib Exposing Top
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Pamela David Nude Pics
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Britney Changes Her KId’s Diapers on the Side of the Road
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Ugly Betty Gets Paid 10,000,000 Dollars For Her Ugly Teeth
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Leonard Nimoy Nude Photography
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Some Creepy Guy Loves His Food Way Too Fucking Much
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4 Out of 5 Doctors Agree that Joe Francis is an Asshole. Girls Gone WIld Update
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Marilyn Manson’s Real Sex Video That I think I Posted Already….
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Some Kid Tackles some Street Performer on Stilts…
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Hot pole Vaulting Chick
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Bansky Exposed
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Bulgarian Fish Market
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Webcam Chick Dancing Topless
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Some Chick Interviews People on the Street With Her Tit Hanging Out
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Stupid Movie Death Scenes
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An Interview with Gym Class Heroes Because Chicks Like Them and You Like Chicks
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Chicks Jerking Off a Horse
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Kelly Clarkson is Fat and Having a Heart Attack on Stage….
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Reese Witherspoon Telling Off The Paparazzi
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Some Teen Cam Chick Posing Gallery
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Big Tits Playing Tennis
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Chocolate Jesus
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Carrot Top Update
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Keira Knightley Gets Undressed by 2 Dudes
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Lilly Allen’s Fat Nipples
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Lohan is Being Sued for Running Over a Photographer Who Was Trying to Take Pictures of Her to Sell and Not Give her a Cut Of the Money…
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Hot American Apparel Ad
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Public Sex Video
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The World’s 10 Worst Mothers
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Sign-Up For a Free Blowjob
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A reader’s T-Shirt Company
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Posted in:stepLINKS|Unsorted

2007

14

May

I am – Jessica Alba's Ass in a Bikini Photoshoot of the Day

No Comments »

I came across pictures of Alba going to some photoshoot last week, or this weekend, or sometime recently, but I seemed to overlook the pictures of her getting water poured on her and showing of her amazing ass in a bikini bottom.

I had an Alba moment this weekend when I went to meet a friend near the boats because I like looking at boats. It turned out that he know someone who lived around the corner who was out of town and that person had a fully stocked bar and TV. So we broke into the house, cracked open some beer, layed on his couch and watched TV for about 4 hours before the cops were called and we had to jump out the fire escape. Either way, that Alba bikini movie with the cocaine and the divers was on, and I chose her over Terminator….True story.

Since I had a Jessica Alba moment this weekend, I’d figure I’d do a post on these, I am creepy like that, but I don’t have her posters on my walls, because I generally hate celebrities and I am not a virgin who finds hope, happiness and love on my TV, in movies and in magazines…I am more into drinking, whores and bitches who can actually give me rim jobs than obsessing over over-paid whores….That’s just my opinion.

To see the rest of the pics of Alba on the Photoshoot with a Wet T-Shirt On that are Big Enough For You Creeps to Zoom Into Her Birthmarks…
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Posted in:Ass|Bikini|Jessica Alba|Photoshoot|Unsorted

2007

14

May

I am – Jessica Alba’s Ass in a Bikini Photoshoot of the Day

1 Comment »

I came across pictures of Alba going to some photoshoot last week, or this weekend, or sometime recently, but I seemed to overlook the pictures of her getting water poured on her and showing of her amazing ass in a bikini bottom.

I had an Alba moment this weekend when I went to meet a friend near the boats because I like looking at boats. It turned out that he know someone who lived around the corner who was out of town and that person had a fully stocked bar and TV. So we broke into the house, cracked open some beer, layed on his couch and watched TV for about 4 hours before the cops were called and we had to jump out the fire escape. Either way, that Alba bikini movie with the cocaine and the divers was on, and I chose her over Terminator….True story.

Since I had a Jessica Alba moment this weekend, I’d figure I’d do a post on these, I am creepy like that, but I don’t have her posters on my walls, because I generally hate celebrities and I am not a virgin who finds hope, happiness and love on my TV, in movies and in magazines…I am more into drinking, whores and bitches who can actually give me rim jobs than obsessing over over-paid whores….That’s just my opinion.

To see the rest of the pics of Alba on the Photoshoot with a Wet T-Shirt On that are Big Enough For You Creeps to Zoom Into Her Birthmarks…
GO

Posted in:Ass|Bikini|Jessica Alba|Photoshoot|Unsorted

2007

14

May

I am – Michelle Rodriguez Bikini of the Day

9 Comments »

These pictures are supposed to be from this weekend, but for some reason they look fucking familiar. I went through my archives to try to find them, but couldn’t so I just assume that this Michelle Rodriguez, monkey looking mexican, just isn’t into wearing bikini bottoms. She’s probably got a fat ass, or some weird deformity like testicles that she’s trying to hide, because even though I can’t find the pictures, I know she’s done this before. What’s even weirder is that I have no idea who this bitch is or what movies she’s been in, but I do know what bikinis she wears.

I kinda feel like I did when I was a kid and was into the girl in the apartment complex next door, I knew pretty much everything about her cuz I wanted a piece, not because I followed her around, but because we crossed paths a lot like I’d run into her at her job or at her school or in the neighborhood. At one point, I had run into her often that I couldn’t just go up to her and ask “do you come here often” or “I think I’ve seen you around”, because it would have been awkward and it probably would have made her think I was a creep or a stalker or some shit. I guess what I am trying to get at with this story of lost opportunities and broken dreams is that if you don’t know a bitch’s name, but know what kind of bikini she wears on the regular, you should introduce yourself. So Michelle Rodriguez, my name is Jesus Martinez and I just wrote about you. Cuddles…

Posted in:Bikini|Michelle Rodriguez|Unsorted

2007

14

May

I am – Britney Spears Staged Performing Pictures of the Day…

1 Comment »

I posted THESE pictures of Britney performing in Vegas that were taken from some dude’s camera phone. I came across these better quality pictures that I think are staged and taken by a professional to look like shitty quality pictures that were leaked to the internet, because fucking with the media and tricking the general population into thinking some intentional out of focus picture was taken by a crazed fan when bitch was performing, when in reality she’s posing before the show as a publicity stunt.

I don’t generally mistrust the media and think I am being lied to and that I should start a site to out the lies, but I do know that I had a girl who reads the site go to the show and bitch was so scrubbed down by security that I think she had an orgasm. I’m talking no phones, cameras or pad and paper to do artist renditions of the show….

Either way, I’ll post them anyway because after all that’s happened to Britney, I think she deserves the extra coverage, even if it’s just for 10 assholes like you, I am still doing my part….

Posted in:Britney Spears|Performing|Slut|Unsorted

2007

14

May

I am – Lohan Bikini Nipple Slip Pictures of the Day

5 Comments »

I drank too much beer last night and ended up passing out on the floor again, it happens, I was feeling a little overwhelmed with the whole mother’s day thing because my wife kept crying because her daughters went to some nightclub where their thug boyfriends sell drugs on sunday. It’s the place where all the strippers in the city go to party because sunday is the end of the weekend and their purses are filled with money from assholes like us, giving them the opportunity to get wrecked and only have to get naked at the end of the night when they go home with the rich guy who was buying them Grey Goose all night, because strippers are more into wallet fucking because their tits are a business asset to them and not free.

Lohan is a lot like a stripper because she’s shown her cunt, she’s shown her tits, and she’s always in a bikini and makes money from it. I know every fucking site has these up already and every asshole at work is emailing the links to his lame coworkers, but I can’t let those cocksuckers rain on my blogging parade so here they are.

I haven’t decided if Lohan’s really got a slammin body, her ass may be fat but there’s something missing from it, maybe it’s your dick…get it. I have decided that she’s a little fucking whiner with her whole substance abuse bullshit, her life can’t be that bad, bitch is in a new city every fucking week and gets to take time off on the beach to decompress from her hectic life of going to events and fucking models from the UK named Calum Best. If she wants to feel pain she should come sit on my fucking computer for a week writing shit for unappreciative cunts like you, barely making enough money to get a fucking lap dance…yeah that shit leads you into the gutter….so today I hate Lohan for showing off how chill her life is….while I upload pics of the cunt like I fucking care if she’s in a fucking bikini…fuck.

Here’s a link to the Lohan Pictures in the Forum all the celebrity bloggers get their pictures from
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Here’s a Link to 119 Pictures HQ and 5 Nip Slip Pictures Download for you Creepy Fucks…
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Posted in:Bikini|Lindsay Lohan|Nipple Slip|Tits|Unsorted

2007

13

May

I am – stepLINKS of the Day

7 Comments »

I am pretty late on these steplinks because my computer stopped working. It happens, especially when you found your computer in the garbage one day while walkin to the park to get drunk after a group of dudes dressed in suits stole your fucking computer when you were at a Starbucks trying to talk to some dude about helping you take your site to the next level because you weren’t making enough money to pay for the server but he had some kind of interest in helping you and you trusted him because not being able to pay for the server fucking sucks.

Either way, it’s mother’s day and if you don’t have a mother, spend it with your wife and if you don’t have a wife, spend it with your girlfriend and if you don’t have a girlfriend, spend it with that hot girl that just moved here for school and has no friend making her willing to spend time with you….

I have been running around all day trying to get shit together for my stepdaughters to make their mom dinner, but they never showed up, my plan failed, proving that being a nice guy doesn’t pay, it just prevents you from getting your stepLINKS up sooner…or something.

Click these links homeboy.

Some Insane Street Mob Turns into a Brawl Video
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Pussycat Doll in a Bikini with The Guy She’s Fucking With Her Dick
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Pussycat Doll Doing Yoga on the Beach – All Kinds of Poses Too Bad She’s Got a Dick
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Geri Halliwell Panty Upskirt
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Some Pornstar from the Legendary 70’s Porn Taboo is Interviewed
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Some Laguna Beach on the Beach in a Bikini Top Action…
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Carmen Electra in FHM
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Some Sammy Winward Bikini Pictures.
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Drew Barrymore Looks Like a See-Through While Partying in Vegas
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Some Britney Spears Nipple VIdeo
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Jenna Jameson Posing Pictures
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Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
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Some Chick Named Crystal Klein in a Leather Mini Skirt
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Some Fetish Fashion How From a Year Ago Cuz You’re Gay
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A Whole Lotta Ass
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Some VBS Video on Muslim Dudes Fucking Donkey’s Cuz the Muslim Girls Don’t Put Out…
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The Game Gets Arrested
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Leticia Cline is a Ducati Girl Posing in her Bikini
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Girls Next Door Pillow Fight
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Hot Teen Pajama Party
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Paris Hilton’s Cry For Attention With a Sympathy Poster for her Dad who is in Hospital
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Latina Ass Video
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Some Idiot Lets His Friends Shoot his Glasses Off With a Pellet Gun Because He’s Fucking Retarded and Doesn’t Realize that Losing an Eye is Not Worth a Shitty Video That Sites Like Mine Link To…
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The Accidental Pornographer
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Photobucket Chick Naked
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Iraqi Hero Tasered By Vegas Police
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One Punch Knockout in some Stupid FIght
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Nude Asian Classical Music
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Jessica Alba Photoshoot on the Beach
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Gisele Bundchen Photoshoot Video
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Gisele Bundchen Candids
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Some Cop Thinks He’s Overdosing on Marijuana and Calls 911
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Some Hot Bikini Fashion Video That’s Not Really That Hot But I am Posting it Anyway
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Lohan Does Martha Stewart
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Celebrities Giving the Middle FInger
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Candy Spelling’s Letter to Paris Hilton
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Update on Akon’s Dry Fucking a Minor Video
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Taylor Twins Showing to Fill Your Twin Fantasies
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Anal Sex Leaves Shit on some Pornstar’s Dick – NSFW
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More Pictures of the Naked Mexicans
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A whole lot of slutty dolls at the dollar store
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Last Night’s Party Goes to a Very Naked Event that I wasn’t Invited To…
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Urinals with a View
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Star Jones Dressed Insane
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Some Stupid Masturbation Intervention Clip
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Some Vintage Erotica
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The White Stripes Tour Dates
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American Apparel Goes Orthodox
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Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
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It’s Mother’s Day – This WIll Help You Make a Lucky Girl a Mother to Your Babies…
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Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2007

11

May

I am – Britney Spears Dressed Like a Porno Clown of the Day

1 Comment »

Britney was spotted out in LA with some chick who she probably is paying to be her friend dressed like a clown I want to fuck. I don’t know much about fashion, I wear fucking soiled clothes that smell like my ass and I haven’t really bought anything in the last 10 years it’s all been stuff my wife accumulates because I have pretty much given up but I do know that Von Dutch trucker hats have been out of style for at least 3 years. I remember a time when every cunt and his sister had one of these fuckers and it used to really piss me the fuck off. The idiots who paid the 50 – 100 dollars for the stupid things, didn’t realize that trucker hats are the cheapest hats out there and the ones I used to wear never cost me more than 50 cents. Unfortunately, those same fuckers have since realized that because I used to like using the hat as a warning sign of who to stay as fuck away from for being a cunt or who to try to hit up for some spare change because they were obviously fucking assholes when it came to their finances…

If you’re wondering why I want to bang her, it’s because busting all over her bald head would be funny, the bruised legs and high socks and short shorts remind me of 70s porn and the glasses remind me of a rich Jewish grandmother who’s about to die and leave me her millions of dollars in my very own trust fund…which banging Britney pretty much is if you get her load dropped in the right place but the whole decision making process of whether to hit her head or bank account through her womb would be too much to handle, thank god I am impotent and don’t have to make these decisions….and her fucking towel reminding us all that bitch is fucking crazy as she grasps her friends hand to guide her through the streets because she is so jacked on meds she doesn’t know where she is.

That’s pretty much all I have to say about that….

Posted in:Britney Spears|Shorts|Socks|Unsorted

2007

11

May

I am – Ornella Muti Nipple Slip of the Day

2 Comments »

I was just woken up in a panic because my whole room was filled with smoke. I was convinced that the building was on fire and that I was going to have to be a fucking hero. I looked out the window and saw a cloud of smoke and heard sirens and knew I had to act. Since my wife was still asleep, I didn’t want to walk her up, because she’d slow us all down by not being able to fit down the fire escape, making us all feel guilty about leaving her behind, this way, she’d probably sleep through it. Choosing casualties is all a matter of survival. I did grab my computer though because it’s my one worldly possession that I can’t live without and ran outside, only to find it was the building down the street that is next to a gas station that I am still waiting to hear explode and now they’ve routed all mainstreet traffic up my street so outside my window is a fucking freeway.

I guess the point of my story is that I am a hero even when the fire is down the street and I handled the situation in a way that only a hero could. I am pretty annoyed of the smell so I’ve turned to the internet to distract me.

I found some nipslip picture that I am only posting this because it’s been a long fucking time since I’ve seen a solid nipslip and even when I have never heard of the celebrity because she is foreign and old it’s still worthy to me. Her name is Ornella Muti and I don’t know when these pics are from…and I realize she’s not the hottest chick out there, but nipple is fucking nipple, stop complaining….

Posted in:Nipple Slip|Ornella Muti|Unsorted

2007

11

May

I am – Nicky Hilton’s Ass in Spandex of the Day

52 Comments »

There are reasons I would love to go to the gym to work out and those reasons are pretty fucking simple. Girls get dressed in spandex because I assume it makes them run faster on the treadmill while all the fucking meathead dudes lift weights behind them. I knew a guy who would get on a machine that was in front of the mat’s where the chicks would do their ass exercises or squats or some shit and dude would just park himself on that thing all day. He’d always brag to us how amazing a healthy life was because of the amount of hot ass he saw, but none of us ever listened. I just put on my shorts because summer is here, and they don’t fucking fit me anymore, like I grew out of them our some shit and they have an elastic waistband, making me have dreams that I actually cared enough to do something about it at a gym where hot bitches squat of me all day. Maybe it will happen one day….

That day seems to already have come for Nicky Hilton, I guess in preperation of her sister being in jail, Nicky’s decided to take her place as the party slut in the public eye, like the runner up at a beauty contest, only this beauty contest isn’t for pretty people, it’s for Hiltons….or maybe now that Paris is too pre-occupied going to jail, she hasn’t been able to distract Nicky from getting to the gym and being the hotter sister, like she has the last 8 years by convincing her to eat donuts instead of doing crunches…That’s just Paris’ way…

Posted in:Ass|Nicky Hilton|Spandex|Unsorted

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