DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2019

29

Jul

Heidi Klum Easy Access of the Day

Heidi Klum is out here starting a new Fashion trend because she is a fashion icon who has worked in fashion since leaving that shitty promo underwear brand that made her…

The outfit is something that has been huge in the gay community forever…especially the gay community in Berlin where she is from…and where the gays meet up at sex clubs listening to Techno to have aggressive anal sex now that PREP makes AIDS from ANAL no longer a death sentence…

I guess she’s bringing it to the mainstream…for you all to see…and as it turns out these assless pants are the best pants when on some 75 year old ex model who doesn’t look 75….it’s a window into a mysterious world that has seen so much cock….her legacy….not so good when on a dude.

Anyway, fantasize about her easy access, direct line to the anus hole, doing the work you’d have to do if ever you got close enough to Heidi Klum to have your way with her cuz you know she wouldn’t be doing that voluntarily…

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Posted in:Heidi Klum|SFW

2019

29

Jul

Izabel Goulart Fitness Goals of the Day

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Izabel Goulart is fit as fuck…so fit that as she nears menopause her musculature is slowly making her look more and more like a man….thank god for those fake tits and long hair so we know what she identifies as…and really there is no evidence that she is not a man, or that she didn’t start as a man, she is Brazilian which for years was the hub of trannies…it’s a cultural thing…

She’s the VS model who hasn’t done much since VS but workout. She still walks the runway show, for whatever fucking reason and her body is fucking solid…especially in this doughy era of fat chicks…so I support her strict dieting and hard fitness work…it’s more impressive to look at than a bitch who doesn’t try…

Plus this pool bike shit, you know spin in a pool cuz it offers resistance is not only cool, but a great way for her to stick a dildo to the seat and none of us would be the wiser…slide the bikini to the side and go…assuming that she doesn’t have a dick…which we can’t due to her Brazilian musculature…but you get what I am saying and that is that this is hot.

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Posted in:Izabel Goulart|SFW

2019

29

Jul

Hailey Baldwin Aggressive Cameltoe of the Day

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Bike Short Generation. It’s the short of the year. The short all thee kids are wearing. It’s the cut-off leggings that are far better to look at on these instagram whores than the soon to be retired dentist in the neighborhood who loves to bike to the grocery store and show us all what he’s working with…while when girls do it..it’s hot…even Hailey Baldwin cuz you can see her full Christian cunt squeezing out as it tries to eat thee shorts….it’s a trend I like…something I’ve always liked…Pussy Definition…the new cleavage.

Even the freaky married Jesus Freaks are about that show the world your pussy hustle…I guess it’s written in the bible…

We can see so much of her pussy that I feel like I can see Beiber’s testicles….but that could be my imagination…what a weird thing to imagine.

TO SEE MORE HAILEY BALDWIN CAMELTOE CLICK HERE

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Posted in:Hailey Baldwin|SFW

2019

29

Jul

Instagram Porn that Isn’t Porn of the Day

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I have been doing a loose feature on the site for years, basically since I started, inspired by the hypocrisy I’ve dealt with running a site called DrunkenStepfather, that early on refused to censor myself because I felt the internet was a place for SMUT…it’s the fucking internet…bootleg media…where people get famous for doing the dumbest shit that wouldn’t have ever got them on TV in the 60s-2000s….but now matter…a dumb fucking place with shit quality content but that people like to consume..

I thought it was funny that Google kicked me off their ad network that made sites with less traffic than this on MILLIONS of dollars a year…I mean in hindsight not that funny…I should have taken the millions of dollars a year…but at the time I was PUNK ROCK about it…trying to be true to myself and not sell out…idiots…

I thought it was funny when I’d get kicked off other social media from Friendster to Myspace to you get the idea….all while the execs at those companies, at the ad companies that ran ads on those companies, where shareholders in those companies…were creepy fucking perverets out there fucking hookers, consuming porn, because that’s what humans do…yet I was penalized….pretty silly..

So now, I scroll social media and see all the shameless smut, that they deem art or acceptable, that I repurpose on this site and still get called Porn….but it’s totally fine on Insta…publicly traded on the stock market under the ticker FACEBOOK..

What bullshit…

Posted in:Feature

2019

29

Jul

Rita Ora Nipples of the Day

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Rita Ora with her hard nipples trying to get another record deal or something…

She is an Albanian popstar like DUA LIPA and BEBE REXHA …I guess 30 years ago, Albania produced a bunch of girls that would grow up to be slutty on the internet to promote their singing…

Communism man…or I guess Communism woman…where communism killed off all the useless bitches and kept the big titty singers who like showcasing their tits so that the public pay attention to them….

Rita Ora, or Bootleg Kelly Osborne as I like to call her because she used to look like Kelly Osborne when she came to America…to be a fame whore scenester….who was everywhere, fucked all the right people so that she could chart and she did chart…allowing her to focus on her favorite aspect of the job…showing off the AWESOME tits…

more – updated today – cuz I don’t want to do another post on her…

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Posted in:Rita Ora|SFW

2019

29

Jul

Monica Bellucci Still Hot of the Day

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Monica Bellucci is still hot at 54 years old, must be all the olive oil. Natures lubrication for anal sex.

I used to work with this Greek pervert in a Warehouse who was fucking the fat secretary or “receptionist” or “administrative assistant” depending on what level of fucking pussy who hates traditional gender norms…and who doesn’t call a stwardess a stewardess or a Air Waitress but instead subscribes to the non-gender specific “Flight Attendant” …shut the fuck up you Christmas Hating fuck…Yes..cuz you’re the same asshole who wishes people a Happy Holiday because you fear offending them…fuck you can offend someone by saying “I thought you were a girl” while realizing they have a dick in their panties…on your TINDER dry hump sessions….

Anyway….I used to work with this Greek pervert in a Warehouse and he’d just go on an on about fucking the fat secretary up the ass using Olive Oil…making the kind of salad he was into…shit on dick…salad…

This has nothing to do with Monica Bellucci at 54…but I used to get my haircut before I gave up on life a decade ago….when Bellucci was 44 by some Italian guy…and he would just talk about her tits..and how great they are despite her age…which I guess is rare in Italy as the woman usually have full beards and are 300 pounds of Ravioli by 44….while this bitch is still someone you’d want to put your dick in her ravioli….which isn’t saying much….we’d fuck anything…including seniors at the home who have alzheimers so that no one believes them when they tell on you – so some hot busty famous Italian at 54 is a no brainer…

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Posted in:Monica Bellucci|SFW

2019

29

Jul

Aubrey O’Day Washed Out Nipples of the Day

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When Aubrey O’Day is not out there milking off Don Trump Jr’s name to get into the media, you know to secure some headlines, she’s doing the weirdest fucking slutty photoshoots at 35, looking like a bootleg Kardashian thanks to all the cheap an accessible cosemtic procedures that turn women into muppets…and so many women buy into that muppet look…like fucking drones…you know the same type of people who LOVED the GAP in the 90s because everyone mainstream loved the GAP in the 90s….are now treating face injections and ass injections and fat sucked out of stomach for instagram like they did the Gap….

What I am saying is that these people don’t even know what is hot, what they like, they just know what they think people like and jump in to get a piece of that pie…which in and of itself is pretty desperate and lame but you don’t need to take my word for it…just look at the pics she’s releasing…softcore middle aged instagram porn and it’s fucking weird…

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Posted in:Aubrey O'Day

2019

29

Jul

Bebe Rexha Pussy Print of the Day

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Bebe Rexha is the fat Albanian popstar like the less fat DUA LIPA because Albania is a hot spot for olive skinned girls with tits who get naked on the internet to promote their singing…

Apparently she got married this week in some publicity stunt like she was a YOUTUBER, and she may very well be a Youtuber…that’s the money making spot even though TIKTOK is the hub of all that is good on social media…since I haven’t been banned there like I’ve been banned everywhere…I am a fan.

I’m not interested in anything this thick fuck does, I don’t find her or her career as a popstar at 30, 10 years after getting into the industry as a song writer that probably made her big money, enough to finance this “VANITY” project….

But she is in her underwear…making fat girl jokes which is trendy since everyone is fat….and that I hate because everyone is fat and I don’t think fat should ever be normalized despite being fat…

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Posted in:Bebe Rexha|SFW

2019

29

Jul

Charlotte Lawrence TIts Out for Fashion of the Day

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Does anyone know who Charlotte Lawrence is?

The rumor is that she’s Martin Lawrence’s wife….but that’s just a rumor…and I don’t even know who Martin Lawrence is….

Others say she’s Joey Lawrences Daughter.

Only WIKIPEDIA knows the truth…and I’m not about to look.

The funny thing is that I’ve probably looked for previous posts and don’t remember because there are too many whores in the BASEMENT we call the internet to keep track of all of their bios, filmographies, etc. It’s exhausting and not a passion of mine….even though you’d assume it was a passion of mine since I spend everyday the last 15 years doing this stupidity…I call that more a curse than a passion.

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Posted in:charlotte lawrence|SFW

2019

29

Jul

Dua Lipa Bikini of the Day

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Dua Lipa with the bikini selfie…

She’s from ALbania with the bikini selfie…

I thought Albania was Arab country….and a place a girl like this would be HONOR killed for her bikini selfie…but DUA LIPA…the youtuber turned popstar has been producing slutty shit for every, it’s the only reason she exists, therefore she must continue the slutty seflies…bikini selfies..

So here’s DUA LIPA in a bikini selfie…

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Posted in:Dua Lipa|SFW