DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2019

21

Mar

Jessica Clements Topless of the Day

Apparently Jessica Clements is a model…that’s the rumor, or what I’ve established whilst looking at her little black and white tits…

She must be important, because why else would a magazine have her strip down topless, to show dramatic and artistic vision in the form of black and white titty pics….

I mean girls aren’t showing their tits every fucking day on social media at all…everyday girls…it’s a fucking thing, making it impossible to decipher or distinguish the actual models from the low hanging fruit tits..

You know the struggle of trying to separate the premium tits, more valuable tits, the kind of tits the A-Listers get pregnant or cum all over…or pay the rent of…from the the tits just trying to be in that scene….from their shitty lives in the midwest because they haven’t saved enough patreon money to put a deposit on an LA apartment tits…

That’s about all I have to say about that.

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:Jessica Clements|SFW

2019

21

Mar

Sienna Miller Bikini of the Day

No Comments »

Sienna Miller was one of my favorite actresses back when she was famous…

I used to think she was just the hottest thing out there…and not just because she got naked in movies, but partially because she got naked in movies….

She’s old now….a mom now…but in a bikini now…and despite being forgotten by me, blocking her out like a child blocks out being molested by her father, only remembering her as a girl I was excited to watch in a movie, cuz she got naked in movies…I was that pathetic…because she’s in a bikini….finally allowing me to understand what being TRIGGERED actually means or is actually about…you know because I hear it all the time, used on facebook, used at coffee shops, used at college bars I sneak into for cheap booze and terrible conversation with annoying, entitled, liberal idiots…but now I actually experienced it….first hand.

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:Uncategorized

2019

21

Mar

Susan Sarandon’s Daughter in a Bathing Suit of the Day

No Comments »

Susan Sarandon has a daughter, like most celebs who in their self involved narcissism want to reproduce with a richer guy than them to give them some level of security even if they are already rich….to elevate their level of richness to the next bracket of richness…it’s just how these things work. Women breed up, unless they are Britney Spears….the only issue with that is that their genetics get diluted by dude who is rich sperm…which is usually a bad thing…cuz rarely are rich men good looking…unless they are born into it thanks to their ugly rich dads knocking up hot models…SCIENCE…

Point being…her daughter is old now, but for a while was a titty actress trying to create her own career as an actress….on Californication…with her tits out….and that concluded her acting career – now she’s just a mom. In a bathing suit…cuz a ho is a ho is a ho is a ho.

Posted in:Eva Amurri|SFW

2019

21

Mar

Irina Shayk’s TIt On Tit with Some Other Russian Sex Worker of the Day

No Comments »

Irina Shayk posted this tribute pic to one of her fellow Russian Sex workers who presents herself as a model.

The picture is old, but it is a dick on dick pic, only instead of dicks like you homos like…it’s TITs….TIT ON TIT…

Some shit they learned when trying to get out of the cold water flat, and were forced into the sex working world, to climb that ladder to the A-List at least one of them has been knocked up by….the other one is Anne V and she had sex with Adam Levine…and that fucker is the worst.

Posted in:Irina Shayk

2019

21

Mar

Ashley Benson Big Tits in a Bikini of the Day

No Comments »

Ashley Benson….fat lesbian Ashley Benson….who scissors with Cara Delevingne the celebrity scissor-er…who for some reason, as a rich and entitled, barely attractive UK socialite, because an international model…like a Hadid…cuz the rich get richer or some shit….and rich fuck the weak, broken, confused celebs like Benson…when they are trying to elevate their scissoring…not that Ashley Benson is A-List, she was on a hit show, but disappeared, only to make a comeback with her tits the last week…she must be promoting something…

We’ve seen fat Ashley Benson, who I guess has been working out, topless when she was less fat….and this is just a bikini pic….and her fat tits don’t seem as glorious or big as they once were…make the rest of her has made them proportionate with her getting bigger….WHO KNOWS….I just know there’s a bikini pic of this trash…TRASHLEY…OMG…never been said before….and I’m gonna post it…

Posted in:Ashley Benson|SFW

2019

21

Mar

Lily Rose Depp in a Bikini of the Day

No Comments »

Lily Rose Depp posted a throwback bikini pic for you perverts to scope out them cankles in a bikini…cankles she unfortunately edited out because she knows about her cankles and my Lily Rose Depp cankle fetish…If I was a little more narcissistic and schizophrenic…in a “people are listening to me”…”people are watching me”….”people know my every thought” kind of way…I’d know she cropped her cankles out to cocktease me…tease..bad girl..

But the reality is…she probably cropped them out cuz no 20 year old celebrity rich kid….wants cankles….blasted out on the internet man…it’s not celebrated like body hair, obesity, skin diseases, and all the other bullshit celebrated and empowered….

Maybe Lily Rose Depp needs to be the FIRST in CANKLE empowerment and awareness…

Posted in:Lily Rose Depp|SFW

2019

21

Mar

Rachel Bilson’s Old Lady in a Bikini of the Day

No Comments »

Looks like this rich mom has been going to Pilates and having a light lunch when she lunches with the girls…

Rachel Bilson in her bikini with her old face just reminds me of a wasted youth…

It’s like seeing a childstar who’s parents exploited them so hard that they had no youth, only this bitch exploited her damn self and not even in the right way…

You see she was at the top of her game – the hot one from the OC, a huge show….only to bow out of that celebrity, like it was too hard to handle, instead of build off it…

So off to Canada she went to breed with her husband..instead of being the naughty 20 something star of a hit show….

Only to come back to Cali 10 years later with goals and dreams and ambition and a willing to get half naked in bikinis…because she’s found comfort in her skin….her loose hanging off her face skin…cuz she’s old.

Posted in:Rachel Bilson|SFW

2019

21

Mar

Ireland Baldwin in a Big Girl Bathing Suit of the Day

No Comments »

Ireland Baldwin is a big and tall girl, she’s like 7 feet tall, 300 pounds, but she’s built proportionate…which is actually how a lot of models look in person, you know, when you’re an international playboy like myself, and you surround yourself with actual models, you know how big and broad they are, despite being skinny, as you go up to their nipples and they seem like they can man-handle you, which is why I always thought the skinny model thing being protested weird…it’s like these people never saw how big these women actually were…they just photograph skinny, but put them next to an average sized man…and see they are twice the fucking size of him….

Not that I am an international playboy, I don’t leave the house anymore cuz it is winter and I don’t have pants that fit me..

BUT I have seen models, and they are big, and so is Ireland Baldwin, who is not a model, but wanted to be a model, only to have her Jesus loving cousin take her job for her….leaving her to fend for herself on social media I can’t follow cuz I’m blocked…

This Awkward, Faux Lesbian, ogre who her dad coined a pig is just another entitled celebrity rich kid….broken…but in bathing suit…

Look she has a friend…

Here are some more of her being a MODEL in her swimsuit

Posted in:Ireland Baldwin|SFW

2019

21

Mar

AnnaSophia Robb in a Magazine of the Day

No Comments »

I was introduced to AnnaSophia Robb when I was watching a weird Jesus freak movie about a surfer who got her arm eaten off by a shark…a one armed surfer who wore a bikini the entire movie….while Jack Nicholson’s daughter played her BFF…who was also in a bikini the entire movie….a great premise of a real life story….the great premise not being the god aspect, the shark aspect, even the surf aspect…but rather the girl in a bikini aspect…that shit is all we need…

Well, she’s in some new show on HULU about that Gypsy Rose freak who’s mom was convinced she was sick and loved the attention she got from Habitat for Humanity and Make a Wish Foundation and all the charities she basically frauded….pretending her daughter was sick…only to be killed by her daughter and her internet boyfriend…some dude who jacked off for 9 hours in a McDonalds as a previous crime….you know a basic retard….

She doesn’t play the fat mom, the sick kid, but the slutty neighbor….who doesn’t get naked but who I guess is out there doing media around the new job – as actors do.

Here’s that media.