DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2016

23

Mar

Old and Sloppy Jessica Alba Stomach in a Bikini of the Day

There comes a time (30) in every woman’s life where she turns 30…and it is all down hill from there…that’s probably why they all start having kids at that age, because even without the kids, they start to get sloppy, their stomachs start to bloat and expand, maybe to make them feel like they aren’t prime pussy anymore so that they breed, or to warm men that they aren’t prime pussy or that fertile anymore so the risk of knocking them up after unprotected sex after meeting them at an N Sync reunion concert are lower, but they’re probably the age where they’d flip the condom out and fuck themselves with the cum trying to get pregnant even if you were protected, not that anyone is protected, all in efforts to put the body to use before it implodes, or I guess explodes…from the screaming uterus…and hormones producing fat cells..

So, Alba, who is over 30, realizes this, and has the odds against her being all Mexican and shit, which if you know Mexicans, and I don’t because I am Mexican in Canada, but I went to a Mexican resort once, they all end up neckless and sloppy…and not just from eating too many corn tortillas…but because of that mean 30…

What I am saying is this girl goes to the gym everyday all day, and still has a gut hanging over her bikini shorts, while on Vacation from her rough job of being on Vacation for a lie of a brand called HONEST she’s honorary CEO of, because it makes her feel smart and makes the brand people have something to promote with..

All this to say…old, sloppy, mom or not..I mean those stretch marked tits look like a fucking burn victim, but I still wonder if she ever takes it up the ass, cuz girl looks pregnant again.

Jesus – I just took a closer look at her shattered tits…what the fuck..

To See More Pics CLICK HERE

Posted in:Jessica Alba|SFW

2016

23

Mar

Bella Thorne’s Shitty Topless Pic and Other Attention Seeking of the Day

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I can’t go a day without posting on this Bella Thorne “actress”…who is working as a social media whore by promoting her rockin’ body she’s at the gym everyday to get..and what I guess look like fake tits, not that it matters..it’s just what this video is tellng me…

Just a little walk for yah 😉 follow me on snap for some crazy ass videos 🙂

I like the winky face, we get it, you like to be shameless in your self promotion because you love yourself and it is working out pretty well…so have fun with it..

A video posted by BELLA (@bellathorne) on Mar 22, 2016 at 3:06pm PDT

Well apparently, she’s starting to snap nude pics she censors with emoji too (top pic)…and I support actors trying to take the power back from the social media influencers we can assume will no longer exist eventually, when marketers realize they are just lame, talentless, boring people who know digital marketing, and how to engage people, which I guess means they are going no where, and the actors will be obsolete, while thee influencers become what the AVON lady is…

Not that it matters, what matters is that I still think she’s 40.

Here she is holding hands with her friends to get you into believing she’s a lesbian or into threesomes like most girls are..

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Bella Thorne|SFW

2016

23

Mar

Nude Alessandra Ambrosio Looking Hot of the Day

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Apparently this is a brand new series of Alessandra Ambrosio pictures on the beach, one of them includes her naked body….because her naked body looks awesome….and not just because you can see her solid round fake tits, and a rockin’ body…but because she defies everything I ever say about 30 year old women who make babies…making me think…coupled with her fake tits…that she may be a man…pre-op mid transition.

Because…women with kids don’t look like this, unless they are scared of getting fired from a job that relies on them being tight bodied – where she makes more money a day than her locals make in a lifetime back in Brazil..

Either way…dude or not..she’ll always be the hard faced Adriana Lima to me and I dig it..

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Alessandra Ambrosio

2016

23

Mar

Olivia Wilde’s Merkin for VINYL of the Day

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Olivia Wilde (Cockburn), the wife and baby mom of one of the most annoying dudes who plays himself in every movie, because I guess in his defence, all these actors are just a fucking lie and are playing a version of themselves, they just have the arrogance to let other dudes called directors tell them what to do like the useless aspiring to be rich and famous puppets that they are….I think it’s a chemical imbalance, especially when they talk about it as more than just “I stood around like an asshole for 12 hours, and for 16 minutes a guy had a camera on me while another guy made me run around naked, it was so liberating and powerful and since I was in character I didn’t feel exposed”…or some other garbage that is code for “I’m a fucking whore, but I get paid alot”…

Well this whore, Olivia Cockburn, is on a show called Vinyl where she showed her 70s bush, which should be a 2016 bush, because bush is the most natural and amazing thing that tells you where to cum when you fuck a woman…but the Kardashians have made you think hair is bad…because on them, it’s all bad, and saying it is bad, probably gets them paid..

The problem with these screenshots is that the bush isn’t even a real bush, so bitch isn’t even being a liberated, feminist, woman…but we can assume she didn’t want anyone seeing her banged out pussy that got here here, or her dick clit….

Either way, here are some of the screenshots…

Posted in:Olivia Wilde

2016

23

Mar

Xenia Deli Hot Model Lingerie of the Day

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Xenia Deli may be named after your favorite place to get Jewish meat sandwiches…in her panties…not that she’s Jewish because she’s from Eastern Europe / former USSR, where the Jewish had to denounce being Jewish otherwise they would get killed off…

She is and owns the best meat sandwich I want dripping off my face when looking at her is hiding in her panties…panties I would take off with my mouth, and she’d probably let me, since despite being one of the hottest, she’s never quite make it like her sex working sisters Irina Shayk…and all other Russian models…I have no idea why, especially with the name Xenia…you’d think nerds everywhere would buy into this…like I have…not that I ever feel like a nerd, I’m more of the coolest person wherever I go while everyone else are fucking losers, who looks homeless and unshowered so I keep it on the downlow..

Not that this is about it, it’s not, it’s about perfection in the form of this deli meat…

These pics are for something called “Design Scene”…

TO SEE HER IN SHITTY CATALOG LINGERIE PICS ,A HREF=”http://forum.drunkenstepfather.com/showthread.php?t=78145″ TARGET=”_BLANK”> CLICK HERE

Posted in:SFW|Xenia Deli

2016

23

Mar

Ireland Baldwin’s Shitty Big Girl Erotica of the Day

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I posted some of these already – but the rest have been released….and they are terrifying…

Ireland Baldwin is a monster, I htink her dad actually called her a pig, but she was young it was pre-puberty, and he was on the right track..probably the most honest thing he’s ever done, considering he’s a huge actor she leverages like all these other famous girls leverage their families, to get ahead as “models”…pretty much making a mockery of the modeling industry which to me was already a joke and required no talent, but the LOL in all of this, is that despite how hard she’s been at it, and how long she’s been at it, she hasn’t been able to convert it into her own fame and fortune, but rather, she’ll always be Alec Baldwin and Kim Bassigner’s very big daughter who looks more like a Baldwin than a Bassinger…and not in a good way…because Bassigner was hot AND Ireland is only hot to people into Trannies, or people like me who like broken, identity crisis rich girls getting half naked trying to find themselves…when not in rehab due to their sadness..

No – She’s not HEATHER LOCKLEAR’S DAUGHTER AVA DOING THE SAME TRYING TO GET FAMOUS IN A BIKINI WEIRDNESS but she should be..

Posted in:Ireland Baldwin|SFW

2016

23

Mar

Chloe Grace for Complex of the Day

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I don’t find Chloe Grace Moretz exciting, hot, amazing, the future, inspiring, interesting or really anything at all…

I don’t think about Chloe Grace Moretz in anything I do ever in my actual life…and seeing pics of her looking like a very average 18 year old, even if she’s booked movies and had a lot of weird dudes like her tween pre-pubescent comic book star character in Kickass, or whatever that movie was a little too much, that they are staying loyal to her as she ages terribly, even though she’s just 18 and that shouldn’t count as “aging”…because they feel guilty that they jerked off to her at 14 and figure if they jerk off to her at 18, they aren’t are creepy…but they are as creepy..

She’s in Complex a Magazine that broke up with me after an 8 year relationship, because no one likes to support a guy who makes jokes to make people feel uncomfortable…

But I’ll steal their pics they put together in memory of the glory days that they featured me in a magazine and paid me for traffic when they needed it as they merged from PRINT to DIGITAL…

Thanks for the memories and for pulling away my revenue to try to make me go bankrupt you jerks. NO love “FAM”…(that’s gangster talk the white jewish people at Complex like to use to seem legit to the black people they pretend to market to, despite being read by 90 percent white 15 year old dudes”….

VIDEO

Posted in:Chloe Grace|SFW

2016

23

Mar

Michaela Schaefer’s Heart Shaped Nipples of the Day

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Micaela Schaefer is some 45 year old German attention whore who pretends she’s a model, but who really is just someone in the scene enough to get invited to red carpet events the paparazzi are at, where she can always where’s ridiculous half naked or full naked outfits….to get in the press…

She’s progressively gone darker and weirder and more naked, it’s the German way, over the years she’s been barely famous, but now, she’s had her nipples cut into hearts on her terrifying fake tits, and it’s fucking weird…

But then again, I think she’s really captured what is important in life…having fun…for the sake of getting attention…that may make you famous, at least to people with weird german fetishes..

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Michaela Schaefer|SFW

2016

23

Mar

Guy Fucks Magazine Box While Handcuffed and Other Videos of the Day

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Windy Day in Russia

Waitress Catches Fire in Restaurant

Pro Bag Thief

Front Loader Gets Rid of Cars

Middle School Student Fights Teacher

Weirdest Hood Fight Ever

Man Pulling Naked Girl is Terrifying

Woman Smuggled 1 KG of Coke in her Tits

Posted in:stepNEWS|Videos

2016

23

Mar

Morning Hangover Dump of the Day

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The highlight of my tinder wasn’t matching with a legit pornstar so that I could cross reference my romantic messages about how we are soul mates and how I neglect her but want to sing her love songs with videos of her getting absolutely violated by huge porn cock…

Actually…it was…

Here are some morning links…

SO MANY WET GIRLS…AMAZING BECAUSE DRY IS ALL I’VE EXPERIENCED…I HAVE THAT AFFECT ON WOMEN
CLICK HERE

Woman with Longest Dreads Marries Hair Stylist
CLICK HERE

Betheny Frankel – Dick Sucking Face
CLICK HERE

Lily Rose Depp and her Boyfriend She Fucks
CLICK HERE

Val Fit in a Thong Bikini.
CLICK HERE

Lindsay Lohan’s Boyfriend is Not a Billionaire
CLICK HERE

Margot Robbie is Tonya Harding
CLICK HERE

A Bunch of TV Freeze Frames
CLICK HERE

What Humans Taste Like
CLICK HERE

Man Lets Alligator Bite His Hand
CLICK HERE

Batman VS Superman – Gets Shit Reviews
CLICK HERE

Hot Enough Girls in Car Selfies
CLICK HERE

Some Chick Named Chantelle Connelly Taking off Bikini Top with Huge Tits
CLICK HERE

Let’s Hope the Kardashians Fucking Die
CLICK HERE

Posted in:stepLINKS