I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2016

18

Feb

Irina Shayk and Steffy Argelich for Vogue Paris of the Day

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Prostitute to the stars, Irina Shayk, may be a soulless Russian, but that’s OK because no Russian women have souls. They are just trained to like the best things life has to offer and they are trained how to get those things using their amazing faces and bodies that we can assume Communist rule has something to do with…because there are so many fucking hot Russians in both mainstream and sex work, that something had to happen, like extermination or “genocide”…to make this happen.

You have to remember that Russia is still a place where people are getting poisoned for doing things that humiliate Russia, whether you’re the head of the Track and Field team, or the ex spy a UK Judget said PUTIN probably poisoned…this is now that the country opened up, and not behind the iron curtain with internet access..we can assume that they are a crazy fucking people…back before they could get caught.

Either way, that doesn’t mean Irina and her topless friend aren’t lovely, if anything it makes me like them more – knowing they are out to kill whatever gets in the way of her “dreams”….and/or retirement plan….and/or Brad Cooper…she’s worked too hard to make this happen.

I mean – this is Vogue Paris, and yes they’ve devalued by using Kardashians and other fame whores to promote their magazine, but they are still Vogue Paris…that’s big for what could have been a Russian sex worker…

Posted in:Irina Shayk|SFW

2016

18

Feb

Bella Throne’s Bikini in Mexico Vacation of the Day

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Some dude was really upset that I call Bella Thorne 40, because she looks fucking 40, and my brand of comedy is to repeat myself until it is awkward and uncomfortable for everyone involved.

I call her a 40 year old pretending to be a recently turned 18 year old, because it is good marketing….dude’s love that tween shit, even if the girl playing an 18 year old is in her 40s….

It’s called “TEEN PORN”…none of those girls are 18, but they look more 18 than Bella Thorne.

I just think it’d be a great story line…for a really terrible movie….that I write about everyday – so when it happens you know I was robbed…

About a Stage Mom with Hipster Kids who Don’t Want anything to do with Mainstream stars, Decides to go to an Audition she finally set up at Disney type company, where she pretends to be her 18 year old kid, gets the part and is forced to build her celebrity as an 18 year old and not get caught…doing the Bella Thorne self loving, self promotion, self promotion, narcissist….instagram slutty bullshit…

No 18 year old needs to be at the gym as much as this one – she’s 40.

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TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS

Posted in:Bella Thorne|SFW

2016

18

Feb

Hayden Panettiere’s Thick Thighs on Set of the Day

Hayden Panettiere shows off her legs in denim shorts while walking on set for a Carl's Jr. commercial in LA

Based on her thighs alone, it looks like Hayden Panettiere is doing an ad for a Fast Food Chain….like she really loves that shit enough to endorse it for a lifetime supply of that shit…

OH. She’s not just getting fat, post pregnancy does that to a woman, especially when they get institutionalized to deal with their post baby depression, and probably deeper rooted issues of being the child of some trashy hooker looking Soap Opera star, probably jacked up on so many fucking anti-depressants…

BUT. She’s actually on set of a Fast Food restaurant commercial.

Look at that keen glimmer in her eyes….she must be staring at the table filled with burgers to feed those midget thighs….

Hayden Panettiere shows off her legs and smokes a cigarette while walking on set for a Carl's Jr. commercial in LA

Posted in:Hayden Panettiere|SFW

2016

18

Feb

Hailey Clauson, Making the Rounds of the Day

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The ad Sales team and Sports Illustrated, a Time Warner company, decided to do a little “native content”…a little “Integrated content”…a Little “advertorial”….a little “Upsell”…a Little “we’ll have our cover girl, no not the fat one and no not the billionaire UFC cunt who would want a lot of money to do an ad for a brand, but the “hot” one who is basically an instagram model, just pay her 10k, and we’ll do it for a million dollars and all the blogs who like half naked girl and cars, because they have no substance and are just a bunch of primates jerking off all day will post it…”.

This is car ad curated by Sports Illustrated CLICK BAIT…you’ll see this on FB with a little “sposored” under it”…as they try to Carl’s JR this shit into a viral video…

Pretty fucking jokes to me all this money going around and I’m not getting any of it. Cocksuckers…

Here she is in ELLE Spain or French Elle, Or Who gives a fuck…she’s hot enough, hip enough, and she sued photographers after posing slutty for a huge brand when she was 16 – something that would blacklist you if it was a real story – but that just got her press as the victim – jokes!

Posted in:Hailey Clauson|SFW

2016

18

Feb

Lookin’ GOod Sweetheart of the Day

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I haven’t done a “looking good sweetheart” in fucking decades. It’s was a joke that died fast like most of my jokes, my term of endearment for what the fuck is going on with this bitch..

But I saw these pics of Tia Carrere and couldn’t help by revisit “looking good sweetheart”….because as a fat man, I like to address people who get fat as they age..

I mean we should have expected it. She’s Hawaiian / Filipino….and we’ve all seen that Hawaiian:

Must be rough when you’re only known for being the babe in Wayne’s World…

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Memories of what was:

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Posted in:Tia Carrere

2016

18

Feb

Victoria’s Secret Takes on Sports Illustrated of the Day

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Victoria’s Secret are well aware that Sports Illustrated swimsuit is happening, they are actually going up against Sports Illustrated..

As an evil corporation who use real models instead of instagram models for their photoshoots, you know an army of immigrant babes who beg to be part of the brand as it is the American model dream, even though Sports Illustrated has the exact same fucking opportunity, yet for some reason cast bootleg, garbage girls….for the most part…

They’ve figured out that if they do an informercial in the spring based on SWIM, since bathing suits are a big market for them, along with the informercial they do for LINGERIE in winter…both the biggest times for those markets…they’ll really own all things SWIM….

All while Sports Illustrated execs are thinking “why the fuck didn’t we do that live SWIM fashion show on Network Television, we wouldn’t even have conflict of interest because we’re not peddling our own products like Slapchop Vince..”…but they didn’t fucking idiots…and here’s SI girl doing SWIM better than Cheesy SI girls…during the SI Swim week, that VS is doing a “shut the fuck up”…on…

Posted in:SFW|Victoria's Secret

2016

18

Feb

Cora Keegan’s is the Bush of the Day

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As a purveyor, curator, endorser, lover of bush, and I have been for my entire fucking life…where the whole “wax your pussy” offended me and made me sad, an dating girls required serious negotiations to get them to grow out their bush, even though the natural way is the low maintenance way and the bigger the bush the sexier the girl got to me….

And as someone who has negotiated with Cora Keegan about her bush over the years we’ve interacted, mainly before she was married to some 50 year old comedian she met on the internet after listen to his podcast…back when she was a Victoria’s Secret dropout, who unlike the Kendalls and Gigis of the world who beg their daddy’s or in Kendall’s case, her “it” to get them into Victoria’s Secret, this Cora Keegan joker said no thanks to the offer and moved to LA to grow out a bush…

There’s something overly hipster, bohemian, Coachella try hard about that..forced….unauthentic but I don’t care what the bush motivation is, as long as there’s fucking bush happening, this motherfucker is happy.

I want bush to be what waxing is, I want every cheesy cunt around (figurative cheese, not literal) to have a fucking lazy girl bush…and I want it on my face or at least in pics so I can imagine cumming in it / on it and having it rubbed the fuck in..

Not that Cora Keegan does that to me, she bores me, but her bush…is everything…I mean at least right now, there’s better bush out there, but I like to give all bush a fair chance…an opportunity to have it’s 15 minutes…

So what I’m saying is that Cora Keegan is my unofficial mascot for the day, as she rocks the bush of the day..

Posted in:Cora Keegan

2016

18

Feb

#TBT 1992 Charlize Theron Never Published GUESS? Shoot of the Day

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Throback Thursday – 1992 Charlize Theron – Pre Instagram in Instagram model poses – pre digital on ACTUAL black and white not a filter. Looking Hot – Because She Was…

I have a few Charlize Theron stories, the first being that I lived with a really fucking weird dude who always smelled like fucking shit – as he never washed – and just stayed in his room getting high off fucking god knows what, fucking random inexpensive hookers, and watching old VHS porn, well that motherfucker got his hands on the Charlize Theron Playboy and that fucking magazine got abused..

It was before she was famous….back in the late 90s….so whenever I see her, I think of those Playboy days…

The other Charlize Theron story was that after her mom killed her dad in South Africa, she was sent off to model at a young age, the mom insisted she go to Hollywood to become famous, when she was in line at the bank, broke about to give up in an era before the instagram model escort agency…some producer or casting director found her, invited her to his office, where she basically said she’d do anything – even porn – at least according to the producer who told me this story…and that inspired girl ended up cast in her first movie – and thus became famous…

THese pics were posted in the FORUM by sleuth celeb picture detective MadamMEOW and apparently they are unpublished pics of GUESS?, that I guess she signed off on, back then, because she was broke and that the company should use in their upcoming campaigns, cuz this bitch, especially in the early 90s was hot…

I guess she is a beacon of hope to all the GUESS Models since her, except maybe Anna Nicole Smith, since she’s dead….but Gigi Hadid and Charlotte Mckinney, maybe, just maybe they’ll be the next Charlize Theron too…#dreams.

Posted in:Charlize Theron|SFW

2016

18

Feb

Man Drinks Pee from Shoes on NY Subway and Other Videos of the Day

Hero VS Robber

Robbers Choke Man for his 22k Rolex

Man Rescues Woman from a Burning Building

Man VS Bull

Drunk Kuwaiti Karate Kicks Cop

Crazy Driver at the Marriott

Naked Man on the Roof

Naked Runner

Posted in:stepNEWS|Videos

2016

18

Feb

Morning Hangover Dump of the Day

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Diary of a Facebook Prisoner: Jesus Martinez

DAY 5 in Facebook Jail

I’ve already lost 5 pounds being in facebook jail, I guess what they say about prison life is true, just you and time, and with that time the only thing to do is lift weights, otherwise you’ll just get raped as the pussy bitch on the block…

Only unlike real jail, facbeook jail just lowers stress levels and brings you to a state of zen, you sleep better without feeling agitated or staring at a phone screen in bed all night hoping a pussy pic will arrive to jerk off to…

Unlike real jail, facebook jail just allows you to find your life again…what real human life is about….and that’s using tinder to negotiate your pussy pics…

Here are some stepLINKS…

These Girls are Wet!
CLICK HERE

Price is Right Contestant Wins an Aston Martin
CLICK HERE

Kanye Thinks His is 50 Percent More Influential than Picasso!
CLICK HERE

Crazy Downhill Race in Colobia
CLICK HERE

Some Fame Whore Slut
CLICK HERE

Gwyneth Paltrow Making Songs About Jimmy Kimmel is Creepy as fuck
CLICK HERE

Carlton VS Scott Disick
CLICK HERE

Nina Dobrev – SINGLE….
CLICK HERE

Girlfriend Not Impressed with New Car
CLICK HERE

Some Slut of the Day
CLICK HERE

Bathing in Beer is the Weirdest Shit Ever
CLICK HERE

The Pope Gets Mad!
CLICK HERE

Shocking to Think the Kim Kardashian is Participating in the Kanye Famewhoring
CLICK HERE

Posted in:stepLINKS