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2023

16

May

Carmen Electra Relives Her Now Very Vintage Playboy Days of the Day

We get it Carmen Electra, if that’s even your real name, you were once in Playboy back in the early 70s, when most of us were going through puberty, because you’re a fucking dinosaur with bolt on tits, but STILL a dinosaur.

Her Playboy magazine isssues are so old they are probably selling at auction as antiques and not because of her being in them, but because there’s only a dozen still around after the great Chicago fire of 1810….

I thought with age and in Carmen’s case, A LOT OF AGE, comes wisdom, or experience, or different strains of herpes making you immune because they cancel each other out, which I guess I can’t confirm or deny via these photos, but I can say that clearly she didn’t learn after ALL these years that a TITTY flash IS not enough for the fans, we need spread asshole, butt plugs, dildo riding, insertion…

This is a new era, girls do this shit for fun on instagram stories, and don’t ask for 10 dollars a month for three losers who haven’t moved on with their life…

A tit flash, barely porn in Europe, yet asking suckers to pay up, is EXTORTION….

We can see tit on CABLE, we see BOX on CABLE, we don’t need to pay ELECTRA to see her tits, like they are even her real tits…

This is not your grannies smut era, or in Carmen ELectra’s case her SMUT era as she is the granny, so I’m pretty disappointed, but her photoshop and filter skills are entetaining…and you gotta give the old bat some credit for not quitting, not giving up, and pursuing her dream of showing off the tits.

Posted in:Carmen Electra

2023

16

May

Tight Pant Tuesday of the Day

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I like pants so tight they start fires from the friction while they are running from my unsolicited sexual advances…..

Not that I am scary enough to make a woman run, or even endowed enough to be considered flashing my cock even with my pants off, it’s an inny….

I don’t have the stamina to run, or even catch up to a brisk walker, but that doesn’t mean I can’t apprciate tight pants or feel like if this was CAVEMAN era, those tight pants would probably generate some pretty horrible results from the people who can’t control themselves when basically staring at someone who might as well have their pants off….since the pants are so tight….and the pussy so exposed through the pants…

HOWEVER…I do appreciate a good friction fire, it’s the survivalist in me, where are the marshmallows, here are the tight pants..

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Posted in:Tight Pants

2023

16

May

Hailey Clauson is in Sports Illustrated Swim Again of the Day

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A tranny, a fat bitch, a granny and a man walk into a Sports Illustrated cover shoot……

The good news is, they still use models….

Hailey Clauson is an interesting big titty model who has been modelling since she was like 14 or 15 and who got a HEFTY payment for being in a provocative shoot when under the agte of 18 for some creeper retailer who she ended up suing for sexualizing a minor and settling out of court, meaning her entire adult life, she didn’t really have any need to model, she had a pile of money from her childhood inappropriate modeling….because being provocative can pay if you set up the right creeper.

That said, she’s been in SI Swim since 2016 and SI Swim doesn’t seem to let go of their models, it’s like a family, and in Hailey’s case she’s not necessarily as tight bodied as you’d want a swim model to be, but compared to the fatties in their other inclusivity and diversity shoots, she’s a fucking win….the kind of actual model they sneak in when the WOKE police aren’t judging them and attacking for not letting fatties in the mix, like some kind of PARODY that’s become REAL life…..

I call this shoot, memories of photoshop….where has it gone, when will it return, we don’t know these people, let’s make them unrealistic body expectations for JERK off purposes.

To see more SI SWIM Propaganda CLICK HERE

Posted in:Hailey Clauson

2023

16

May

Things to Wear to the Beach Tuesday of the Day

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I like to think that the only reason Zuckerberg owns half of Hawaii with his data mining platform that people don’t mind having their data mined from, is all because of the bikini…

There’s the idiotic rationale that people have about data mining, which goes a little something like “I have nothing to hide” or “they are watching me anyway through my phone, so why not just let them make billions off our backs”….not realizing that the DATA mining is not only invasive but the same data that has trained the AI to be smarter than you….

But that’s just the power of the bikini….

I remember an ongoing bar conversation I’d have when the SMART PHONE first happened, or when I first got mine, which was probably 5 years after the first smart phone happened, where I would say “imagine I told you that I’ll give you a device that listens to everything you say, reads everything you write, knows everything you search, every site you visit, every porn you’ve jerked off to, every woman you’ve said inappropriate things to while drunk, ever picture you’ve taken, every location you’ve been, including your current location” you’d think I was crazy, now people are buying this shit for 1000 dollars…..but hey, it will allow women to take and post more bikinis, which means you can view more bikinis, so it’s worth it…

Basically, we’ve given up our freedoms and live in tyranny all thanks to swimwear and I’m almost OK with it, cuz swimwear is HOT..

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Posted in:swimsuit

2023

16

May

Video of the Day

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I am sure this is a pretty old edit, in part because fat is now normalized and calling an under water fat bitch a whale is frowned upon in our modern and horrible society…

I am well aware of the trending memes, stories, videos, news clips, brawl videos, twerking videos that people post and maybe I’ll post more of those, I’ve posted that shit for decades at this point….people don’t come here for that, they go elsewhere for that, but since they don’t come here for anything, I can focus on things I like like the timelessness of making fun of a fatty underwater…it’s great…

Posted in:Videos

2023

16

May

Tiny Tits Tuesday of the Day

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Tiny Tits Tuesday is the day we celebrate the Tiny Tits, in a way to hopefully not get any tits slaughted and implanted with cancer and inflammation causing tit sacks, even if it makes it more visually exciting for the perverts out there, who don’t know how to appreciate smaller packages that have just as much bite, with less bark than the bigger tit counterparts….

As it turns out, some tiny tits can also be breast implants, which is something I generally pretend doesn’t happen, because why would a girl waste her time going from an a-cup to a barely b-cup…..because the world doesn’t make sense, that’s why….

But as a general rule, the tiny tit celebration, because tiny tits are hot, perky, lovely, and still have nipples to suck on, needs to happen to save the tiny tits that think they are unworthy being tiny tits, unless of course the tiny tits feeling unworthy give people like me a chance to play with them because they feel inadequate….

MAYBE I am looking at this all wrong and instead of being a hero to the tiny tit community by endorsing them, I should be hating on them, making them feel insecure so they have something to prove to me about their tiny titty worth….

Something to think about…right…

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Posted in:TINY TITS

2023

16

May

Irina Shayk’s Nipple Show of the Day

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I am pretty behind the curve on this series of pics posted by the hottest of the models, even in her old age, living life as a single mother, who potentially wallet fucked some A-Lister until it made her a baby, for that guaranteed good life, or it was just a needed tool in her espionage training to get that access to all the right decision makers who are excited and won over by both A-Listers and hot models….

But Irina Shayk, the soulless, cold, pragmatic Russian who gets shit done, from BEARDING for RONALDO to making it into SI SWIM for the world to realize that Russia has some hot chicks, which is probably why people should stop bitching about them over this war that no one really seems to care about no matter how hard they push it on us like it was COVID….nothing a NUCLEAR ATTACK won’t fix as we scramble into our bunkers…OH WAIT…we don’t have BUNKERS…but we have all these nice things we’ve bought on CREDIT…check out my designer BAGS Kim Kardashian told me to go into debt to buy….DUMB FUCKS….not prepared for anything….

But yeah….IRINA SHAYK, hot model, mom model, Brad Coopers cum dumpster that generated new life, posted her nips in a wife-beater like she’s at 1996 VANS WARPED TOUR in the middle of summer, when that was the trend, and I’m into any nip pics I can get of Irina Shayk and really of ANYONE….

These were posted MAY 3rd, I was probably TOO JAZZED about May the Fourth, you know since I’m really into Star Wars so hard I haven’t seen it since it came out in the 70s…or maybe I am just bad at blogging, which my bank account that was de-banked is telling me…

The other pics are from MIAMI F1, also weeks ago…..BUT IT IS NEW TO ME…

Posted in:Irina Shayk

2023

15

May

Leni Klum’s Near Sheer Top of the Day

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I don’t know what these Leni Klum pics are from but I know they are worthy of a post, let’s call it a Mother’s Day post, in part because she’s got daddy issues from her mommy having illegitimate babies during her ample sex partner years, but also because her mom is Heidi Klum who we’ve all wanted to play German sex dungeon with since she surfaced as what we could only assume as a Nazi eugenics program gone right, so the whole wanting to fuck the mom made better by wanting to fuck the daughter at the same time, bother literally and figuratively, while totally settling for just latching on the daughter’s tits whilst saying “momma” since they are bigger than your head and on such a tiny frame.

This has been a very long sentence.

Posted in:Leni Klum

2023

15

May

Denise Richards Still Brings the Cake of the Day

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It is Mother’s Day so this goes out to all the mom’s out there, including but not limited to Denise Richards…a MOM of three who is seemingly too rich to be doing this kind of exclusive content hustle, yet she’s doing the exclusive content hustle.

Like I always say about OnlyFans, I always thought the world worked in a specific way, that things went in one direction, yet it turns out that I was wrong, so there are old, rich, nasty, fat, ugly, has-beens, attention seekers, pretty much ANY and all women are able to recruit subscribers for a cheap monthly fee…people pay even for those I’d think wouldn’t get anyone to pay.

Now someone like Denise Richards, even in menopause, living a horny life she probably already lived, could obviously score enough dudes to justify humiliating herself, and really she’s not as gross as she could be at her age, it’s just more weird and creepy than anything.

I wonder if it has to do with her husband or ex-husband porn addiction, the normalizing of porn, that whole thing, where she’s always wanted to basically be a “sex worker” because she probably was one, but didn’t get the recognition for it….

Or maybe this is how you spice up your life as an exhibitionist at any age, but knowing it’s not getting any better, this is the BEST she will be for the rest of her life, as she slowly decays, if not now then when this shit….

I am all for Denise Richards doing softcore porn, I’m a massive fan, I am just shocked we are HERE today even having this conversation alone, to a screen, via a blog post, THE way conversations are meant to be.

Now show us more SKIN WALLET! It’s Mother’s Day!

Posted in:Denise Richards

2023

15

May

Milf Monday of the Day

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MOTHER’s Day Continues, we actually celebrate it here every Monday with MILFS and lactating tits….because motherhood is the WHOLE point of life therefore, we should sexualize it.

MILFs who produce erotica on the internet are either married and miserable, or married and looking for excitement, which their husbands support because they’d rather have other dudes pay to jerk off to their tired pussy than being the only one, plus the idea of men lusting over your tired pussy may be inspiring to make you want to jerk off to your tired pussy by seeing her in new light…..

Or they are single moms looking for extra money to support their existence, ideally in a professional job or working at schools, so that their story goes viral and they get more subscribers, it happens often enough…which means that single moms are still desperate to show their kids how to fail at life, but also for men to validate them knowing that they have failed in the traditional sense of the whole family planning and are now forced to raise fucked up kids from single homes….which they apparently say come out better, but I’d argue that’s just propaganda to get more hopeless people posting nudes online for the dream!

Either way, I’m into watching as it unfolds….this modern LEAVE IT TO BEAVER suburban family life is WILD….

HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY….to all the single mothers who used to be desperate enough to let me play with their tits, but who now probably monetize said tits to a ridiculous level of financial gains….

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Posted in:Milf