I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2009

14

Dec

Boring Bikini Model Party You Weren’t Invited to of the Day

Doutzen Kroes and Alessandra Ambrosio were kickin’ it after their really stressful day standing around in a bikini and getting paid hundreds of thousands of dollars, so they hit the bottle….and shit looked really fucking boring. I prefer model parties to end with lesbian sex orgies because they had a little too much to drink….

My only really question is what happened to Adriana Lima? She was always my favorite one and her wholesome viringity was a lot more fun than watching washed up mothers drinkin’ themselves stupid cuz they’ve got nothing better to do with their time while the baby is with the sitter and they’ve got 5 minutes to their fucking self to let loose and play charades or whatever the fuck she’s doing…all this party is missing is for one of these sluts to bust out the Scrabble board….cuz they’re so fucking wild.

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Alessandra Ambrosio|Doutzen Kroes

2009

14

Dec

Kelly Brook is a Desperate and Horny Whore of the Day

I can smell the dripping horny pussy from here…Kelly Brook must be at her sexual peak and her biological clock must be ticking…or maybe she’s just trying to put on a show for the small amount of the public who actually know and care about who she is…or maybe she’s just being possessive and overcompensating because her athlete boyfriend is probably dippin’ his gym shorts in a whole lot of other pussy cuz that’s what pro athletes do and I guess she’s just trying lay her stake for the world to see and I find the whole thing desperate and disgusting…rent a fucking room you whore…I hate horny girls because there’s nothing hot about a girl losing herself to her pussy’s itch…acting all swoony and pathetic…I prefer a girl who hates sex and is only letting me inside her because I’m either paying or raping.

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Kelly Brook|Public Sex|Whore

2009

14

Dec

Alessandra Ambrosio One Piece Bathing Suit Photoshoot of the Day

Alessandra Ambrosio brought her disgusting mom body out in a bathing suit because I guess Victoria’s Secret is contractually obligated to give her work and the whole thing makes me feel really sorry for her husband and his poor planning. He thought he was locking down Alessandra Ambrosio, the hugely successful bikini and lingerie model, but instead he turned her into this. Disgusting.

Here’s the proof that karma’s a fucking bitch…and it is really pictures like this that make me really happy to be me and good about myself…you know with my obese wife and poverty cuz it coulda been worse…I coulda married a supermodel who ended up like this…and by this I mean pretty fucking hot. I suck at life…

BONUS – Here are some actual BIKINI pictures to show you how GROSS she is and really drive my point home….

Pics via Bauer

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Alessandra Ambrosio|Bathing Suit|One Piece

2009

14

Dec

Kelly Osbourne Shitty Bikini Pictures of the Day

I realize that any picture of Kelly Osbourne would be shitty, but if bitch is gonna get in a bikini and have pictures taken of her, I’m pretty fucking willing too look and laugh at her imperfections, especially since she’s probably at her fittest because she’s been on that Dancing with the Girl who has a Famous Father show, dancing all day training, but even if she was at her fattest I’d want to see it. I’m the kind of guy who likes watching trainwrecks even though they aren’t that pleasant to watch, especially if those train wrecks are half naked…

Either way here she is with her homosexual boyfriend who she gets the same haircut as because she thinks it means they are actually in love, while he’s just trying to ride her coatails to the endless supply of cock fame in America will bring him, but sometimes, I guess ignorance is bliss…like back when I used to think arabs were just people in pajamas who didn’t understand why we wore everyday clothes when you could be comfy in your PJs, before I realized they wore those pajamas to hide suicide bombs….Those were the good years….

I love that they captured her fat self that can’t control her fat self and starts eating one of her hats….

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Bikini|Kelly Osbourne|Shitty

2009

14

Dec

Katie Price and Her Tranny Tits of the Day

I wonder how many times Katie Price pulls out the lips on her weather vagina and shapes the shit into something that looks as close to a cock and ballsack as possible, because there is no fucking way this girl doesn’t realize or that it is an accident that as the days turn into months, she turns into a fucking dude. Maybe it is just the make-up, maybe it’s just how the plastic surgery sets, like foundation on an old house, or maybe she’s on hormone therapy, cuz after Peter Andre, she realizes that her life calling, or at least her sexual preference is to fuck gay menup the ass with a huge black strap on dildos….and that she can’t live without a cock….but at least as she slowly enters manhood, she still has a pair of the stupiest fake tits to ever make a cunt with no purpose famous…and here are some pics of her trashy and dressed like the kid on welfare you’d find at K-Mart.

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Jordan|Katie Price|Tits|Tranny

2009

12

Dec

stepLINKS of the Day

I have been trying to crash office Christmas parties the last couple of days, my theory is that this upcoming week will be a lot busier for Christmas parties. Since I work alone, I figure I need to get in on some free food, free drink and easy drunken office girls who don’t realize that I don’t actually work with them, because they’ve had a little too much eggnog. I’m not too confident it’s going to work out, but there’s no real harm in trying, because despite being a loser with very little ambition or drive, these kinds of stunts get me excited….and until I find Christmas parties, I’m heading back to the mall to look up skirts of slutty teenage girls lookin’ for atttention….or like I call them…the Christmas Miracle from God….

Here my stepLINKS


The Sexiest Soap Opera Sluts
GO

I Just Jerked Off to Tiger Woods’ Apology Statement…
GO

Breaking News: Chris Brown Flips the Fuck Out
GO

Pam Anderson Smells More Like Stale Cum By the Day
GO

How Awesome Would It Be If Angelina Jolie Left Brad Pit For Muhammad Ali
GO

Because I Know There is No fucking Way You’re Going out Tonight
GO

Newspaper Headlines from The Simpsons
GO

Sex Trek is the Only Kind of Trekking I Want to Do – VIDEO
GO

THE SATURDAYS Frankie Sandford Panty Upskirt
GO

Banging Kate Hudson is Pretty Much the Closest the Banging Vintage Goldie Hawn I Will Get
GO

This Jersey Shore Thing is Kind of Getting Out of Hand
GO

Find Girls to Fuck – Because Sex is a Two Person Activity
GO

Action Versus Pants – VIDEO
GO

Drunken Argument Friday: Would You Rather Fight a Dozen Elves, or One Reindeer?
GO

Let Me Get This Straight. Tiger Woods Wife Will Stay With Him If He Gives Up Golf
GO

Rihanna on Stage in Some Weird Get Up, But Looking Kind of Hot
GO

So Long Flight of the Conchords
GO

Heather Graham is Irrelevant But Here’s Her Tit’s Anyways
GO

Ahhhhhh More of the Simpsons
GO

All I Want For Christmas is a Dick Towel
GO

Celebrity Lesbian Cat Fight in 3…2…1…
GO

Swat Team Epic Fail
GO

Check Out the Rack on Clea
GO

Veronica Loves the Great Outdoors
GO

If Tiger Woods Doesn’t Want His Wife, I’ll Take Her
GO

Use This To Get Sex..Because Sex is Fun
GO

Gun Safety Fails
GO

Just When You Think Nick Hogan Couldn’t Get Any Stupiders
GO

Kelly Brooke is in a Wet Bikini
GO

A Lesbian Make Out Compilation
GO

Gotta Love an Amateur
GO

Why Isn’t Aubrey O’Day Whoring Herself on Hollywood Boulevard Yet?
GO

Dominno Yanks Off Her Shirt
GO

Drunk Slutty Girls SImulating Sex At a Costume Party…
GO

Alessandra and Molly Live the Fabulous Life
GO

Gotta Love Some Beach Tits
GO

The 8 Most Hilarious Tracy Morgan Television Moments
GO

And a Little Bit of Abbey Brookes
GO

Malika Menard – Miss France 2010 Pageant Photos … WOW!
GO

Jenny Rolls Around in Bed
GO

Yeah Yeah Yeah Madonna, We Know You Are Better Than All Of Us
GO

Lookin Good Sweetheart
GO

Tips For Single Ladies…from 1938
GO

I Love Me Some Zoe Saldana
GO

WWE DIVA AND PLAYBOY COVERGIRL MARIA KANELLIS OFFERS BEAUTIFUL POKES AND TIGHT LATEX DRESS UPSKIRTS!
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS

2009

11

Dec

Jessica Alba in Some Tight Shiny Clothes of the Day

It’s Friday, I have no patience for Jessica Alba or her stupid flashy outfit…I see girls like this everywhere, you know who take style to the next level of bad and try to squeeze into every fucking possible popular trend….it’s usually tacky fucking immigrants who don’t have much money or a fucking clue, and they’ve just managed to save up enough money to get the bootleg version of whatever is popular and in efforts to fit in they put it all on at the same fucking time like some kind of fucking clown, only Jessica Alba has enough money to know better. She’s got people to stop this kind of thing and should have people who advise her to flash her pussy every once in a while….but unfortunately, they dress her like Christmas ornaments instead…..and no one fucking cares…not even me….

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Clothes|Jessica Alba|Tight

2009

11

Dec

Kristin Cavallari Showing Off Her Feet for Creepy Foot Fetishists of the Day

Kristin Cavallari, someone who is totally useless to begin with, even more useless than the rest of the cast of The Hills, because she wasn’t smart enough to get on that shit when she coulda been the star of the shit, but instead her ego thought she’d get other work, real work, reputable work, respectable work, good work and not bottom feeding work, and it turns out she was wrong, because she crawled back to MTV in what I hope will be the last season of that garbage, that seems to have been replaced with Guidos from Jersey, something a lot more entertaining than this group of cunts, even when they are out showing off their stupid fucking naked foot to all the foot fetishists out there while shopping for shoes….and I’ve already said too much about this twat.

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Feet|Foot Fetish|Kristin Cavallari

2009

11

Dec

Amber Heard in Her Bikini for Some Shitty TV Show of the Day

I always forget who Amber Heard is. I just know her name comes up a lot and it turns out that she was on some shitty show I’m sure wasn’t a real winner for her, but in hindsight was a winner for us because she’s in a bikini, I guess, if you consider that winning, which I don’t, because I get nothing out of this shit other than seeing young bodies I don’t have sitting on my face and even when I was their age, I was too busy eating out the blind albino chick to hustle the girls like this who didn’t know I existed, so I guess if anything shit makes me feel like the loser, I already knew I was, but I am posting it….cuz I’ve come this far….

Here’s some clips on another slut I’ve never heard of named Tessa Thompson in this low level bullshit TV show….

Posted in:Amber Heard|Bikini

2009

11

Dec

Paulina Rubio Goes Platinum in Whore Boots of the Day

Since I’m Mexican and the same age as Paulina Rubio I feel like we have a total connection. The only real difference is that I look like I’m in my 60s, I’m fat and no one wants to fuck me, even when I slip into skirts and fuck me boots, while she looks pretty much good enough for me. I also don’t have a job and she’s got a platinum record, I guess in efforts to show all of us lazy fucking Mexcans how it’s done, or how inadequate we are because we work minimum wage jobs or illegally to just get by and feed our fucking families…or in my case….my alocholism which is a lot more satisfying than annoying kids, while she’s at home counting all her fucking money while looking good enough and I guess I really don’t have anything in common with this bitch…and either does any other Mexican because she’s gone fucking white on us….here are some pics Viva Mexico….Like I believe in that shit….motherfuckers.

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Paulina Rubio|Platinum|Whore