I have officially decided to follow Zelda Williams around because we go way back. I was trying to seduce her when she was just a private school girl in San Francisco on Friendster 5 or 6 years ago. She never bit, so I can only assume she’s a lesbian, especially when going shopping for moisturizer with your arm around some slut while wearing plaid. I am sure you would be a lesbian if you’re dad was Robin Williams too, I mean dude’s fucking annoying as shit and having him as the predominant male figure in your life, would probably lead you to other side. I just hope she inherited his hairy gene, because if her pussy looks anything like her father’s chest, she’d pretty much be my dream girl, but that’s just cuz I like Bush and am over this whole Obama thing.
I know what you’re thinking, and that is that this Jackson sister looks like a fucking monster, something you’d expect to see in a horror movie coming to eat your brains. I guess it’s got something to do with her having had a couple of plastic surgeries and those plastic surgeries slowly falling apart like an old car that was once luxurious, but I’d still stuff her like a turkey, provided she’s still got a vagina, but that’s just because I have a thing for girls who look like they are a fucking corpse.
Someone emailed in these pictures of Jojo from her Facebook. Sure she’s pretty much irrelevant, but there was a time when people/perverts everywhere would talk about the things they would do to her, once she turned 18. She was one of those jailbait fantasies that fell into obscurity after she became legal. I was never feeling this girl. Her ghetto swagger and thick body that got violated by a bunch of black dick just did nothing to me, kinda like these Facebook pictures. I wasn’t expecting to see her in a black on white chick orgy, I wasn’t even really expecting any panty shots, but the girls on my facebook , have pictures that are a hell of a lot more incriminating, the kind of shit that will get them rejected from all major colleges when they reach that milestone in their young adult life, but I’ll post these anyway, because they are something, even though they are pretty close to nothing…if you know what I mean.
Kristen Stewart’s dad is white trash. I hear he gets in the paparazzi face because he looks like a Jew and racists hate Jews the most because they aer white. I also hear that when he’s not inseminating bulls, he’s playing with a collection of panties from the women he’s raped in his tool shed. He doesn’t like dentistry, but he does like smoking, drinking and breaking shit and eating mustard out of the jar while reading magazines with full spread pussy shots, because it is his only option when it comes to reading material….because words are hard to read, but spread pussy is universal. He’s jerked off to his daughter at least once while she was sleeping and has successfully convinced her to shower with him when her mom was at work, and by work I mean in line at the welfare office, because watching the stuff that made her go back in her is what makes his world one worth living in.
Have you ever seen an aboriton? I haven’t until today and I wish I never had. This shit was traumatizing. This should be a fucking condom commercial. I suggest you don’t watch it and despite everything in me that told me not to post this shit, I feel it’s good to know exactly what I am talking about next time I make an abortion joke, or at least maybe it will motivate me to make miscarriage or still birth jokes instead. I guess we’ll just have to wait and see what happens next time I do a Lily Allen post.
On a side note, posting an abortion on the site is probably not my high point.
Coleen Rooney’s still in her bikini, this is day three of me watching the little pouch of fat above her bikini bottoms. I feel like we’ve become friends, like when I look at the picture shit’s talking to me, asking me advice and wondering what it should do later tonight, because it’s bored. I feel like it’d be good company, you know to grab a drink with, maybe rub a little, or bounce quarters off of, but I hear Coleen Rooney’s got no plan to let the fucking thing venture off on its own, she’s greedy cunt and she insists on keeping it all for herself to play with, forcing me to only maintain this love affair through pictures, if you know what I mean.
Kim Kardashian in work-out gear is the same thing as an anorexic girl at an all you can eat buffet. It just doesn’t make sense to me, because she’s fat. The fact that she’s got a work-out DVD coming out is like an anorexic landing a cooking show. I am sure there are better analogies, but today’s not a good day, especially after writing about this useless bitch with about as much substance as my dog’s shit, that seems to have an endless supply, but always stinks, if anything I should win a fucking award for trying to come up with something out of nothing for the last 4 or 5 years….
Rod Stewart likes big girls, because he’s short. It’s a typical small man syndrome situation, where the small man spends his teenage years jerking off to the hot girls in his class, then decides that he’s tired of the rejection, gets successful and runs after all the tall girls he otherwise couldn’t have, usually being manly lookin’ models, because anyone who sings the shit he sings has got to be gay, but that’s not good for his career, so he goes for girls who know just how to strap on and fuck the shit out of him in his extended king sized bed he got from the same supplier as Shaq and when he’s done he climbs up and down her like a mountain climber trying to conquer a mountain.
I hate Tila Tequila, which is probably expected since I hate most people. There’s something about her that makes me feel there is something seriously wrong with the world. I don’t understand how she can have a career and the attention from the paparazzi, her own show with MTV, book deals, hosting parties and making lots of money doing shit like that for being a half naked asian with fake tits.
Her milking this lesbian shit because she’s figured out that it gets her more airtime and secures her brand, offends me. Sure, this new goth chick is hotter than the last pussy she pretended to date, but so is the shit smear on my toilet seat that’s been there all week, because she was fucking hideous.
Her bending down to this girl’s pussy area and sticking her tongue out to give us the fantasy of what is going to go on in the bedroom or club bathroom is about as attractive as a chick mimicking a blowjob by air-jerking a dick and opening her mouth, the type of thing you’d expect from a fat chick who doesn’t know how to seduce.
Shit’s all about being subtle, it’s about being sexy, coming out and doing this shit just makes you look like a fucking joke, but for some reason, she gets more work and attention from it, and that bothers me. Not to mention, I have a feeling they aren’t even fucking and this is just a cry for more attention which makes the whole thing that much worse…
Sure this post had no point, because I know you love this kind of fake slut behavior so look at the pics.
I had the pleasure of watching the last 5 minutes of American Idol at a friend’s house. Yes, despite popular belief, I do have a couple friends and they do let me in their houses, sometimes. I think I wrote that I am surprised this shit is still on the air and that Americans are still watching it. Sure, you elected Bush to office after his first term and I am sure have done a whole lot of other fucking stupid shit, but this just doesn’t make sense to me. Watching the audition process is more like watching the shitty auditions, maybe some of us want to hear people who can sing, instead of watch a show milk the bad auditions that they set up, as hard as they fucking can. I like how Ford, Coca Cola and whoever else sponsors the shit out of that show and lines Simon’s British pockets support laughing at people with serious disorder, whether it is autism or apergers or just fuckin’ mental illness, they aren’t right and mocking them, crushing them and spitting them out for America offends me.
On a side note, the new judge reminds me of the kind of girl you’d find drunk at the bar, falling off a stool, her hair and make-up a mess, a cigarette hanging from her mouth backwards, talking all kinds of shit about how bad she wants to fuck, before lifting up her skirt, grabbing her cunt for the bar tender who just wants her to leave the fucking place, before pissing herself and puking all over the bar at the same fucking time. She’s like a horny, raspy motherfucker, who is a condescending mess threatened by younger more talented people than her. I’d totally fuck her.
Yes, I just wrote about American Idol. I should hang myself from my shower curtain, unfortunately, we don’t have a shower curtain.
Here are my links.
Support the Site By Getting Girls To FIst Each Other… GO
Bad Girl’s Club Can’t Suck Dick and Apologizes….Pathetic GO
The Fake KKK from Yesterday Issue an Apology Because they are Pussies…
On a Side Note – Bill O’Reilly and Dennis Miller Tell Jay-Z and Young Jeezy Their Time is Up as Being Inspiration to Black People Because Someone With Substance Has Stepped Up.
