I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2008

27

Nov

Top Turkey Videos for Thanksgiving of the Day

I am going to admit, I didn’t put much effort into this. There are probably way better Turkey videos out there and I apologize to anyone who spent hours slaving over their Turkey video, hoping one day it would be featured on a site nobody reads.

I just figured when you assholes are all dicking around with your family, or by yourself on your day off, doing whatever bullshit you do to entertain yourself, whether it’s watching football, telling your mom how much you miss her and are so happy to be back home to suck her tit and help in the kitchen, going through old photo albums, and wondering where the good old days have gone, dealing with repressed memories of you getting touched by one of your uncles during Thanksgiving dinner many years ago, or if you’re trying to come to terms with your unresolved issues with your parents, you know feeling like you don’t measure up to your siblings, like you’re their least favorite, like they’re ashamed of you…..you might as well do it to these videos…

Not to mention, I think it’s good to know where your Turkey’s been and what it’s gone through to end up on your table, while I sit here eating pasta noodles with soya sauce I found in the back of the closet, and it pretty much tastes like shit…

Here are the videos….

The 6 Dollar Ukrainian Turkey…..

Some Weird Angry Death Metal Turkey Killer…Named Psycho Jim….

Farm Boys Don’t Just Like Fuckin’ Their Sister, They Like Burning Turkeys To Death….

Psycho Jim Does it Again Only With Restraints…

The Butcher…..Music Provided By DJ AM….

Good Ol’ Country Folk, Claude Ouellette & Albert Rozas The Turkey Killers With a Sense of Humor Edition….

A Couple French Men, An Axe and an Obscure Film Artist Lookin Motherfucker

Some Wierd Interpretive Student Film Turkey Slaughter

Posted in:Thanksgiving

2008

26

Nov

stepLINKS of the Day

I know you are probably on the road, in a car, on a train, taking the bus, flying to visit your family on this glorious holiday, or you are sitting alone at home because your family didn’t invite you since they decided to go to the beach to avoid you and the disappointment you always bring with you. Maybe you’re the one who decided not to see your family because they always judge you and embarrass you knowing you came from them, but it is still Thanksgiving and you should be getting into your turkey costume for the traditional turkey stuffing to clear out your insides for the Turkey Feast tomorrow, but maybe that’s just how they do things in my home, I guess any excuse to stick dick in ass, is a good one…..

The point of all this is to say, be safe, eat well, don’t get too drunk and fuck your family members, don’t get too made and go on a murderous rampage because you feel alone in life, because you’ve always got me….not that that’s a good thing and I will only communicate with you via email, but it’s better than offing yourself.

I admit, I am partially jealous of you, since I like eating, it’s kind of a hobby of mine, but I don’t have to work on the site tomorrow, but probably will, because not everything is about USA, there are other people in the fucking world you know….and some of us had Thanksgiving months ago.

Now unbutton your pants, start your drinking and send me some pictures of the craziness that happened.

Remember no party is a success unless at least one of the people involved has to take the morning afterpill…

I am not sure if that applies to family functions….

But it does to me.

Ok, enough of this haiku bullshit, here are my links for now….

Thanksgiving Turkey Porn
GO

The Penis That Ruined Tara Reid, Ruins Another Girl….
GO

I Don’t Know Who Kitty Lea is But She Makes Me Want to Fuck the Shit Out of an Elf
GO

Why Hello There Shovel..I’m Nuts
GO

Britney Should Stay on Whatever Starvation Diet She is Doing Because It’s Working
GO

Sharon Stone Geriatric Upskirt
GO

Electric Door Knob Prank…
GO

Diddy Thinks He’s Obama Cuz Money Makes a Motherfucker Crazy
GO

The Hottest Native Americans in History
Happy Thanksgiving, You Fucks
GO

Maria Sharapova Is Good For More Than Just Tennis
GO

Throwback Hair Dryer Prank
GO

Find a Girl to Fuck Because, Well, DO You Really Need a Reason?
GO

Danica McKellar is Just Too Much
GO

More of the Gorgeous Tiny Chicken Machine Show
GO

More Drama With Paris
GO

And That’s Why You Don’t Play Darts When You’re Drunk
GO

Rope Swing Fail
GO

A Couple of Ad Agency Employees Banging in the Office at 5 pm, Because They are Hypocrites and Think What I do is Porn…Well Maybe They Should Be Watching More Porn, Because Their Cubicle Sex fucking Sucks…
GO

Some Archie Bunker Homophobia That Would NEVER Air on TV Today Because We’ve Got Soft….Motherfuckers…
GO

Top 10 Dysfunctional Families
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Some Cheesy Sluts Posing WIth Motorbikes Gallery
GO

Chelsea Handler Posed Naked for Playboy
GO

OK Magazine Has a Funny Typo…
GO

13 Things to Look Out For in Steven Segal’s Reality Show
GO

Old Video of Some Reporter Turns Hood
GO

Sign-UP to this Porn Site and Make Me Rich…
GO

13 Female Celebrities Crawling Around on All Fours…
GO

Tiffany Mulheron Gallery
GO

THE ARRESSTED DEVELOPMENT MOVIE IS HAPPENING
GO

Georgia Jones Loves the Great Outdoors
GO

The War on Drugs
GO

Sophia is Sultry
GO

Economic Crisis is Killing These Celebs….
GO

Miranda Kerr Looks Good on the Cover of Page Six
GO

Angelina May Be Knocked Up Again
GO

Striptease of the Day
GO

Naughty Dog Versus Shaking Ass
GO

Chick Gets Nipple Pierced
GO

A World Without Crazy Ladies on Crack is Not a World I Care to Live In
GO

Build a Raft Naked! Why Not?
GO

You This to Get Sex Because You are a Loser That Never Gets Laid And Its Starting to Be Pathetic
GO

Sorry, But I Love Snoop Dogg
GO

The Stomping of the Grapes, But without I Love Lucy
And in Cartoon Form
GO

Infinity + Infinity + Infinity
GO

A Whore Named Aubrey O’Day is GOing to Be Doing Playboy…..
GO

Even Madonna’s Own Daughter Hates Her
GO

Train Your Cat to Poop in the Toilet
GO

How To: Lose a Stripping Contest
GO

ROGUE COLLECTOR’S PHOTOBUCKET FINDS…

Hot Young Ass Posin in Underwear…
GO

I don’t know if this is legal photobucket….you guys should go to jail….
GO

Vegas’ Version of a Scene Chick in Her Underwear
GO

Thanksgiving is Depressing, you know seeing how annoying your family is, or how happy your brother is, so steal his credit card and make yourself fuckin’ happy for once in your shitty fucking life….
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS

2008

26

Nov

Kristen Stewart Smokin’ the Pipe of the Day




Here are some pictures of Kristen Stewart, some chick I’ve never heard of because she is ugly, but who is part of this whole Twilight phenomenon and people are confusing as being something pretty, when the only thing pretty about her is how ugly she is. These are some pictures of her smoking some pipe you’d buy at a head shop to smoke whatever drugs you want with. I guess she’s taking a lead from her big Celebrity Rehab brother Sean Stewart, not that they are related, but with a face like that they could be. Something seriously went wrong with Rod Stewart’s sperm….I blame Karma getting back at him for him getting through a loophole and landing a fucking career, tons of money and many ex-model wives….or maybe it’s just too much partying on the road fuckin’ things up a little.

Speaking of drugs, I assume the only drug she’d be smoking in public is one that is legal, because she doesn’t want to lose future work and drag her name in the mud like she’s some kind of Lohan, since she’s new to the scene, but still wants to get fucked up enough to look in the mirror and believe all the hype she’s getting, so I’m guessing she’s getting down with Salvia.

Here are Some Pictures of her showing off her tight little body….that doesn’t match her broken down face…

Wow…bad post…

Posted in:Kristen Stewart|Smoking

2008

26

Nov

Claudia Schiffer’s New Job as a Bad Tooth Clown of the Day

I had to go to the vagina doctor with my wife. I didn’t really understand why, because she needs more of an exterminator than a doctor for that shit, you know it’s like it’s been left to fend for itself for too long that the fucking thing is no longer a medical issue and more one of pest control, but being the nice guy that I am, I went with her.

The radio was on in the waiting room and I was forced to listen to an hour of Christmas songs. From Bing Crosby, Elvis, Perry Como and it even went into some of the newer shit, that came a solid month too early for my cold dead heart, so I asked the bitch at the desk to put on something a little less annoying and offensive and she told me to sit down and turned up the fucking volume. I was a little surprised that such a big cunt worked at a vagina doctor, but I guess it was fitting.

Speaking of fitting, it looks like Claudia Schiffer’s teeth are trying to escape that clown mouth of hers, she probably regrets leaving David Copperfield back in her prime, when she didn’t need his services, because motherfucker could have sorted that shit out for her, I mean he did walk through the great wall of China and he did make the Statue of Liberty disappear, meaning he has what it takes to make her beauty not disappear, but I guess she’ll just have to go to a plastic surgeon like the rest of the supermodels who aren’t super anymore, but who want to be super, because it is all their know, and their whole contribution to the world and self-worth is based on their beauty, and now that it’s gone, they’re left not knowing what to do with themselves….and in Claudia Schiffer’s case, that personal conflict has made her forget her teeth bleaching treatment while trying to figure out her next step..

The good news is that if she chooses to not go through with the surgery, she can always take this look to the local hospital to Patch Adams that shit for sick kids, I hear it’s rewarding.

On a side note, part of me has died today….

Posted in:Claudia Schiffer|Clown|Teeth

2008

26

Nov

Eliza Dushku Gets Eye Fucked By Some Who Can’t Dick Fuck Her of the Day

I knew an older guy who had spent many years drinking and eating badly. We used to hang in the park, he was retired and I was just a slacker, and he was shitting blood for a couple weeks before we forced him to go to the doctor. He had some kind of ass cancer and they had to remove something and that fucked up his boners.

So this dude spent the next 6 months depressed and complaining to us about how he can fuck whores like he used to, he couldn’t even jerk off because he couldn’t get it up, and that his shit was officially broken. He tried Viagra and it didn’t work, so his doctor suggested testosterone therapy because it was supposed to keep him young and virile, despite being in his 60s.

What that treatment did to him was fucking criminal, it turned him into a fucking monster. He’d stare down women like a guard dog scoping out a black guy climbing the junkyard fence, he’d talk about pussy more aggressively than ever, and he’d grab at random chicks who would walk by. Dude turned into a fucking rapist, but couldn’t do shit about it, because despite the fucking testosterone, his dick still didn’t work, so here was this raging hormonal freakshow who you couldn’t walk down the street without breaking some kind of law and scaring anything with a pussy, who was more sexually frustrated than you have ever been in your life because even though he wanted to fuck more than he ever did, he couldn’t do anything about it, so he got off the treatment, went back to normal and 6 months later they found out the cancer had spread and he died, and this picture reminds me of him and is my little tribute to let him know I have never forgotten those magical days of creepin’ together….

Posted in:Eliza Dushku|Old Man

2008

26

Nov

Pink’s Sober and Has Lesbian Sex With Herself in her New Video of the Day

Pink’s new video for a song called Sober hit yesterday and I was too lazy to post it, mainly because I didn’t really give a fuck about Pink or her penis, but I came across the screencaps of her having sex with herself in lingerie and figured it was weird enough to put out there. Is she going on the Lohan kick and doing what nature intended for her, or is she just over guys because her husband broke her heart by leaving her for a real woman, or maybe she’s just given up on everyone and has vowed to spend the rest of time fucking herself, and I guess it doesn’t matter because she’s not hot, so thinking about who she fucks, how she masturbate or even her getting off in general is something that should not enter anyone’s mind, because if it does, you may just be gay, but you already knew that didn’t you, you just don’t want your family to know…

I don’t know what I’m going on about, the truth is I’d fuck Pink, there I said it, but then again I have no standards and haven’t quite figured out if I am gay or not, but I like the idea of her broken heart, down on her luck accessibility, not to mention her bank account, and her hardcore suburban rock attitude that makes me want to punch a mall security guard while high from compressed air at Best Buy,after he busts me stealing underwear from Sears….or some shit.

So if you can stomach sitting through a Pink video, there’s a couple seconds of her having sex with herself.

Here are some of the screencaps….

Posted in:Pink|Sober|Video

2008

26

Nov

Warning…Don’t Go to Mumbai for your Thanksgiving Weekend of the Day

If you had plans to go to Mumbai for some Butter Chicken cuz your family didn’t invite you to their house for Turkey, you may want to re-schedule, because shit is in flames, people are getting killed, people are being held hostage and US and British people are being targeted and Sikhed (get it). The airport, hotels, restaurants and cafe’s that tourists frequent are all getting hit, and this is some crazy shit, so if you’re reading this, you can be thankful that you are an ignorant piece of shit who’s idea of Indian is people on a reserve who don’t pay taxes and run Casinos and your idea of traveling is going to a 3 star resort in the Dominican or Cancun, because culture is for losers while Cancun is for all you can drink bars, tit flashing and getting herpes before your 21st birthday….all for around 1000 dollars.

Here’s a video….I am sure tons more are out there….


Follow the Story on CNN
GO

If you’re lookin’ for a deal, you may want to reach out to the Oberoi Hotel, it’s One Currently Being Attacked….It could like bookin’ Florida during Hurricane Season….I should be a Travel Agent….

UPDATE – DO NOT CALL ANY CUSTOMER SUPPORT NUMBERS FOR ANY US PRODUCT BECAUSE THE WAIT TIME IS LONGER THAN USUAL.

ANOTHER UPDATE – THE TAJ HOTEL IS ON FIRE AND PEOPLE ARE STILL INSIDE THE HOTEL BECAUSE THE TERRORISTS TOLD THEM TO STAY IN THEIR ROOM – PROBABLY A VERY HORRIBLE WAY TO GO – RIP MOTHERFUCKERS…..

Posted in:Mumbai|Terrorist Attacks

2008

26

Nov

Beyonce in Full Body Spanx on the Today Show of the Day

In honor of Thanksgiving, I decided to post these pictures of a turkey, or someone who will probably eat an entire turkey tomorrow, because Beyonce is the kind of girl who just doesn’t like sharing and has the ability to clear a table stocked with enough fried chicken for a couple dozen people, but in her defense, she’s never been this physical in her performances, and that probably works up a mean appetite, you know making those who used to be shocked with how much she managed to eat before, she was doin’ nothing, totally blown the fuck away when they see what she manages to stuff in her face now, and it’s got something to do with her not wanting to share the spotlight with the younger, hotter Rihanna who I know she just can’t fucking stand, even though Rihanna’s career is making Beyonce’s divorce settlement a lot more lucrative, when she finally leaves Jay Z for two timing her.

Every time I watch her do this song and dance, I laugh because of the pain I see in her eyes. It’s like watching some morbidly obese person trying to get a new lease on life and taking their fat ass to the streets to burn off some calories, or like watching my wife trying to get off the couch. There is struggle and panting as heart is begging her to stop, but Beyonce won’t listen, because if she does, it means Rihanna won.

At least she’s managed to find a full-body pair of spanx to strap her in and keep her fat from spilling out all over the fuckin’ reinforced stage, making the homeless people they kicked off their corner to throw this street performance even more pissed off, you know in a first they take their homes and now they’re rubbing how much food they’ve managed to stuff in their faces in their face, while they sitting there starving, cold in mismatched shoes waiting for it all to end..

Here are the pics.

And the videos….

Her Performing Single Ladies…

Her Obnoxious Grand Entrance and a Little Crazy in Love

Bonus Some Dude in the Crowd’s Vidoe

Posted in:Beyonce|Fat|Spandex

2008

26

Nov

Holly Montag Shows Her Panties on MTV Canada of the Day

Her name is Holly Montag and in case you were wondering she is the spin-off of her sister Heidi, that’s just how deep The Hills goes, it makes celebrities out of the family and friends of the lying pieces of shit who the show is based on, which means that not only does that shit ruin our lives, but also the lives of innocent people, who get caught up in the whole thing when they see how much money and how many perks their siblings are getting, that they need to jump on the fuckin’ bandwagon and get their fair share or some shit, and at least they are getting paid. I just hope for their sake they don’t think this is going to open any real doors for them, because the fame from this show is fleeting. There’s no room to show off any actual talent and I’m sure no producer would touch anyone who has tainted themselves with this shit, it’s like fucking the fat chick in your neighborhood, who’s pussy smells like gym socks and old cheddar one night when you’re drunk at a party, the same party the hot chick you’ve been working when you are of sound body and mind is at, the one who accidentally walks in on you in the kitchen pantry with your dick 2 inches (75% of the way) in this piece of shit girl that is only at the party because no one had the heart to tell her she wasn’t invited for fear of having her columbine their asses, and the same girl who looks at you disappointed around the same time they throw up in disgust and run off in tears because she was on the fence about getting with you, but just need a little more convincing, but instead of working on them proper by getting her too drunk to realize what the fuck she was doing, you go out and fuck the fat girl who smells that everyone teases.

I don’t know if that made sense, but being a fouth tier character on The Hills is career suicide, but at least Holly Montag’s got the right idea and shows her very white panties on Canadian cable channels, not that it’s that big of a deal, since only one person is watching the shit, but it’s a big deal to me, because the white panties my wife wears are only white for about a minute before the yellow mucus discharge faucet in her pants wins the wrestling match that is her putting them on.

Either way, I’m a simple man, and these pics are good enough for me and that’s why I am sharing them with you. Thanks girl on Facebook who I stole these from. I’m sure you’ll be emailing me to take them down in about a minute. Asshole.

Posted in:Holly Montag|Panties

2008

26

Nov

Megan Fox is Still a Slut, Even When Wearing Lots of Clothes and Flying Away For Thanksgiving of the Day

I’m not a lesbian or anything, but Megan Fox pretends she is to get attention from the media and really secure her place as the town whore everyone wants to fuck. Kinda like Katy Perry and her whole kissed a girl shit, proving that men are weak, it doesn’t take very much to get excited, but the least Megan Fox could do is get out of her Brian Austin Green issued uniform that covers her from head to toe, and show us that pussy she’s always talkin’ about using because eventually she’ll have had his kid, since she’s under his spell, and it’ll all be over for her, true story, some crazy lady told me all about it on the bus today, she carrying a bag filled with bras and underwear she picked up at the Salvation Army, so I’m not sure how much of what she says is fact and how much of it is crazy.

Posted in:Megan Fox|Slut