I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2008

18

Jun

Kate Moss and Her See Through Dress of the Day

Here is Kate Moss in a see-through dress, because she only owns see through clothes, we’ve seen it all before, who gives a fuck about this aged cokehead model I want to fuck and her stupid fucking nipples they are common than white people, more common than taking a shit, more common than you masturbating, even though up until today you thought nothing was more common than you masturbating.

Posted in:Dress|Kate Moss|See Through

2008

18

Jun

Rihanna’s Nipple Ring of the Day

Rihanna was in Montreal a couple of weeks ago for her Kanye West concert and she went and spent 2700 dollars in American Apparel and left the girl working the counter a 3 dollar tip. I have no fucking idea why she would spend 2700 dollars in American Apparel, you’d think that would buy the whole store, and I have no idea why she would bother tipping such a shitty tip but that’s the local gossip.

The not so local gossip is that Rihanna has a nipple ring like some kind of biker lesbian chick, which doesn’t really make sense to me, because I never understood why girls would get the shit, but it seems to be more popular than ever, even though I thought they were a thing of the past, and I know this because I hang outside of piercing places an ask the girls what they are going in for and for the most part they’ve been saying nipple rings and I’ve been being asked to leave.

Either way, here shirt is see through.

Posted in:Nipple Ring|Rihanna

2008

18

Jun

Jessica Biel’s Got a Hot Lesbian Girlfriend of the Day

I don’t know why everyone is all up on the Lohan/ Ronson lesbian scandal while people like Jessica Biel are openly out and by out I mean totally showing off their lesbianism with some old fat chick. I feel like that kind of sexual dysfunction is almost worth talking about but then again, Biel is pretty useless so I’ll just leave it at that.

Posted in:Hot|Jessica Biel|Lesbian

2008

18

Jun

Keanu Reeves Dates a Topless Chick Named China Chow of the Day

Keanu Reeves is the kind of dude you’d find in a Lady Bar in Thailand, making a 6 year old boy tickle his testicles, at least that’s how he markets himself by hanging out with and fucking British actresses who make a mockery of their heritage by giving themselves somekind of stripper stage name like China Chow. It reminds me of the time I met a stripper with a Russsian grandather called herself Katrina when her real name was Brenda and the truth is at least that was how because she had hot tits.

I don’t remember the last time I hit up a Chinese restaurant and thought to myself how badly I wanted to stuff the waitress like she was a fucking eggroll, or a dumpling, and that’s not because there aren’t hot Chinese chicks, it’s saying that there aren’t any where I go eat because I am poor….

Either way, with a girl that looks like this proves that Keanu Reeves is a failure and a fucking faggot and you are too because you are diggin’ this shit.

Posted in:China|Keanu Reeves|Topless

2008

18

Jun

Audrina Patridge Gets Out of a Mercedes of the Day

The girls from The Hills may be useless cunts, but they drive Mercedes and that’s better than my whip, which is a pair of sneakers with holes in them.

Either way, I did a post on Holly Montag, Heidi Montag’s sister and she found out and got back to me:

Hey Drunken Stepfather!

What you wrote was pretty hilarious, but would you mind taking my pictures down please? They are my private photos that only my friends are supposed to be able see, and I think you know better…

Thank you,

Holly Montag

This is the closest brush with useless fame I have ever had, except for that one time I saw Wesley Snipes in a bar and he threatened to kill me, but at the time he wasn’t useless but that story is as tired as his bank account.

Either way, I’ll take the attention, even if it’s through her useless party slut sister, something more useless than useless but it’s good enough for me…..

Posted in:Audrina Patridge|Mercedes

2008

18

Jun

Shannon Elizabeth’s Got Jungle Fever of the Day

I love how pissed off dudes get when they see a bitch they want to fuck or a bitch that they have fucked rockin’ out with a brother. I don’t think anything can piss a white dude off more than knowing a black dude has been up in a bitch first. I was talking to a friend the other day who told me that shit was going well with his chick and was thinking about asking her to move in with him, then in a game of truth or dare amongst friends at a dinner party (because my friend is a fucking yuppie faggot who goes to couple parties to play truth or dare in hopes of hearing something hot that he can jerk off to because he can’t fuck other chicks), he found out that his girlfriend’s ex, that he knew all about and that he knew was the first to give her an orgasm and the first to fuck her up the ass and the first dude who knocked her up that lead to her first abortion or miscarriage was Black and he freaked out and dumped her. Now, this may not sound crazy to some of you racist fucks, but it sounded crazy to me, because he was about to move in with the girl and just because she got black dick before him, she was disgusting to him and damaged fuckin’ goods.

Shit like that never bothered me, maybe because I am brown and think white dudes are boring, suburban and lame, maybe it’s because I know black dudes have more game and know how to play a bitch better and get what he wants out of them and respect that, maybe it’s cuz I know girls are sluts who like getting ravaged by huge cocks and white dudes aren’t up for the task, but whatever it is, who cares.

What I do care about is why more white people aren’t hating on Kim Kardashian for fucking a black dude, you’d figure if you’d go so far to dump your girlfriend or never date the hot chick who wants you for doing the same thing, the least you could do is carry that racism over into your sexual fantasies and ignore eveything Kardashian does in hopes that she disappears, instead you sit there and jerk off to her like some kind of pervert because you are one.

Here’s some Shannon Elizabeth with a black dude who she may or may not be fucking.

Posted in:Jungle Fever|Shannon Elizabeth

2008

18

Jun

Shauna Sand in Some Hair Salon Porn of the Day

I have a feeling that you’re the kind of guy who hangs outside of Beauty Salons and peers in at all the luxurious women getting there hair done, until they notice you and ask you to leave, because I know I am.

When I look at rich women, a lot of times they look as ratty as streetwhores because they have seen their fair share of tanning beds, hair bleach, packs of cigarettes and cock that doesn’t belong to their husbands and look just as tacky and haggard as a prostitute. It reminds me that girls will be girls and that they are all cut from the same cloth, because no matter how much money you have you’re still a fuckin’ whore, just one in more expensive accessories, clothes and cars.

I like to think of Shauna Sand as the missing link between suckin’ dick in back alleys for 5 dollars and suckin’ dick at prestigious events for a quick adrenaline rush. Because she looks like a whore, she made her money being a whore, but she’s got enough money to get her hair done where the high society women go and that turns me on.

Posted in:Uncategorized

2008

17

Jun

stepLINKS of the Day

I’ve had some bad internet luck the last couple days and I am trying to sort it out but it’s not working out too well for me. What is working out for me is that people still hate me despite my absence from the internet and are sending me hateful messages. Here’s one I got today.

YOU ARE MEAN. YOU ARE SICK. YOU ARE VULGAR. YOU ARE CRAZY. YOU NEED PSYCHIATRIC HELP. HOW IN THE WORLD CAN YOU BLAME ONE CHILD FOR ACCIDENTLY KILLING ANOTHER? THIS COULD HAVE BEEN ANYONE AND THIS CHILD IS A GOOD PERSON WHO IS A GOOD STUDENT, A GOOD FAMILY MEMBER, A WITNESS FOR THE LORD (THAT YOU NEED, BUT HATE). CAN YOU?

IMAGINE HAVING TO LIVE WITH SUCH AN ACCIDENT? i GUESS WHO HAVE NO INSIGHT INTO REAL LIFE WHATSOEVER. YOU ARE THE CRUELEST AND MEANEST IDIOT I HAVE EVER HEARD. THERE IS A PLACE FOR ALL OF US AFTER DEATH, BUT YOURS WILL BE DOWNWARD, NOT UPWARD. I CANNOT BELIEVE THAT ANYONE WOULD SAY THE CRUEL AND IGNORANT THINGS YOU SAID.

GO GET HELP WITH YOUR LIFE. LEAVE OTHERS ALONE.

My response:

Are you trying to get me all horny on the computer again using your smutty dirty God talk again? I have no idea what you are talking about but am thinking about all the dirty things I could do to your vagina while God watches. We could make him his very own porno cuz it’s pretty obvious he’s down with voyeurism, otherwise he wouldn’t follow me to the bathroom everytime I shit or threaten to pass judgement on my readers who are constantly masturbating in shame, the way God likes it.

I once asked a girl if I could judge her masturbating and she slapped me across the face. She was a whore, but not the good kind ov whore who would take money in exchange for me judging her masturbate, let’s just hope you won’t be so abrasive when I ask to judge you in action. I guess none of this matters. Send nudes because I am convinced you are fat otherwise you’d be out having fun and not sitting at home emailing me smut. You little minx. With Love,

Jesus Martinez
DrunkenStepfather.com

The Sluts Next Door Are At War!!
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The Hulk’s Debora Nascimento shows you What’s What
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Marisa Miller Puts the Twins on Display
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Anne Hathaway is Single
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Porn Slut Mary Cary has a Nipples Slip
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Play The Celebrity Photohunt!
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The Greatest Sports Riots Caught On Video:
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Heidi Klum Lookin’ Like Shit on the Red Carpet
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Top 10 Hottest Videos of Drunk Chicks Making Out
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Some Broad Doing Parkour That Is Pretty Amazing
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Some Sister Feeds Her Little Brother Something Special
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New Megan Fox Photos
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The Veronica’s Are a Female Band Worth Liking on Looks Alone
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12 Shots Later
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How To: Use A Cock Ring So You Last for then 20 Seconds
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Miranda Kerr Pretends to Be a Catalogue Model
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Yet Another Hot Chick Playing with the Wii Fit in Her Underwear
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Now That’s an Alex Trebek I can Relate To
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Maids At Your Service
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Teen Alexa Strips Down
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Sharing is Caring
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A Good Collection of Japanese Pranks
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Man Loves Giant Cheeto; Freaks Me The Fuck Out
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Brazilian model and Victoriaís Secret Angel Izabel Goulart Puts Most Women to Shame
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Ring Hereos Sexy Ring Sluts Make Cage Fighting Less Gay
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Rhianna and Her Legs Went Out For Dinner
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Nude Streaker Scores
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Charlize Theron Looks All Kinds of Hot at Some Premiere for a Movie She Just Made
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It Will Take More Than a Puppy to Make You Look Cutr Darling
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Kelly Ripa is Kind of Looking Half Decent
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Remember Those Hippies Kanye Pissed Off At the Festival? Here’s Some of the Aftermath
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Enough Porn To Keep Your Hands Busy All Day
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Bianca Has the Kind of Rack You Only See In Your Dreams. Or In Her Gallery
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Some Work Out Slut Who is Pretty Hott
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Real Girls Hate Peta
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Babe Appraiser Would Be the Best Job Ever
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I Asked If You Could Fuck a Song – What Would it Be….They Answered
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Sunny Leone Video
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Christina Milian Hot Dress Throwback
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Christina DeRosa is Hotness
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I Think Ameria Wins This Face Off Because I Love Her, But You Decide
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Tara Reid is Still Sleazy
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Miley Cyrus…blah blah….Topless Shoot…blah blah
Here’s Some More Pics of Her Jailbait Ass
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Nikki Sanderson = Boners All Over
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Jodie Marsh Tits Throwback
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Shamron Moore is Better Seen and Not Heard
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The Hottest Sluts on the Net
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Office Play Makes Working Fun
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A Nice Self-Shot Collection
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Vanessa Hudgens New Song is Terrible, But At Least She Looks Good in the Video
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Porn REVIEWS:

MILF Movie Club MAkes MILF Hunting Worth It
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Spring Break Fantasy
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Nebraska Coeds
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Drunken Holes
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SUPPORT MY ADVERTISERS AND IN TURN – SUPPORT ME

Use This To Get Laid, and Make Mom Proud
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Happiness is Merely a Click Away
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Find Girls To Fuck, Because You Comic Collection Can Only Do So Much For You
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BONUS:

Some Montreal Slits That Are Most Probably Underage and Therefore Totally Your Thing. Perv
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ROGUE COLLECTOR’S PHOTOBUCKET FINDS

Looking Good Sweetheart:
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Posted in:stepLINKS

2008

17

Jun

Karina Smirnoff Gets Upset When Talking About Maria(o) Lopez Cheating on Her of the Day

I don’t know what’s more embarrassing, admitting you dated Mario Lopez from Saved by the Bell on TV, or crying about the fact that he cheated on you. I guess nothing destroys self esteem like being cheated on by some second rate loser going off fucking chicks behind your back, not because you are inadequate, even though it feels that way, but because dude’s just trying to hold onto this fame thing as hard and as long as he can and will sleep with anyone who offers because he knows he’s a fuckin’ has-been loser with little time left of convincing Hooters girls that he’ll show you what he used to do to Zach from Saved by the Bell, because a time will come when the generation of Hooters girls will have no idea what the fuck Saved by the Bell is and bedding 23 year olds will be a thing of the past. Those fans are hitting 30 now, soon they’ll be 40 and the only thing fun about fucking a 40 year old is menopause.

Posted in:Karina Smirnoff|Uncategorized

2008

17

Jun

Kate Hudson is Banging Armstrong not Strong Testicles of the Day

Comments Off on Kate Hudson is Banging Armstrong not Strong Testicles of the Day

So it turns out that Kate Hudson is borderline lesbian because she dates dudes with half the testicles other men have and if that isn’t one step closer to eating pussy I don’t know what is.

I kinda always had a feeling she was into rubbing cunts back when I realized she had no tits, and all the girls I know with no tits like fucking chicks. Also, her baby daddy had long hair and fat man tits and fat dudes look alot more like fat chicks than they look like real men, so I can only assume she spent countless nights licking his asshole pretending it was the asshole of Roseanne.

Either way, I hate how celebrities try to avoid admitting they date each other, it’s like we really give a fuck who Lance Armstrong is laying it into. We barely even care about watching him win bike races because the only thing gayer than racing bikes are the shorts the men put on to ride their racing bikes after shaving their legs. It’s the whole foundation of my “Gayer Than Bicycle Shorts” expression and these 2 assholes are not important enough to be avoiding any questions, or giving well-thought out answers to questions, except maybe when people ask about how Kate Hudson lead Owen Wilson to suicide when he realized what she looked like naked.

Either way, here’s the clip of Kate Hudson avoiding the question about Lance Armstrong last week:

Live Strong.

Posted in:Kate Hudson|Lance Armstrong