Modern Day Journalism
 
 

2010

24

Nov

Jessica Simpson is Bloated as Fuck of the Day

I guess the sperm finally stuck…I guess a dude finally jumped on this frieght train and did what she wanted all these years…and that was pretend to love her and knock her up so she’d stop feeling second rate to her sister….someone finally saw the opportunity we all saw as her sadness emotionally ate in one sitting enough food to feed a small family for a week…

I guess, someone finally pulled the K-fed…unless she’s just still fat as fucking hell…far fatter than ever…only to be confused for being pregnant and not denying it for embarrassment that she’s hit the point where people think she’s knocked up, even though she’s just a fucking porker…Lock your fridges….Jessica Simpson is coming for your baked goods….

Posted in:Jessica Simpson

2010

24

Nov

Ashley Greene Boring in Spandex of the Day

The only thing interesting about this Ashley Greene pig is that she’s dating a Jonas Brother. I know that may sound really fucking queer, but the one thing I’ve learned about motherfuckers with stupid fame and money who play all wholesome and virginal out of respect to Jesus’ and his followers’ best interest for marketing purposes, is that they like to have the dirtiest raging cock and viagra parties to make up for the oppressing of natural human instincts, if you know what I mean…

So Ashley Greene, something that seems fucking boring on the outside, never giving pussy puppet shows for her fans, cuz she knows she’s made it and has a solid fan bases that’s not going anywhere, is probably far more exciting than we could ever imagine. which is exactly where you want her to be cuz you think she’s as hot as she does….but I’m thinking my theory is wishful thinking that all pussy is slut and that no pussy is dull as this one seems to be…

Oh well, here are the pics of her leaving the gym, or whatever boring bullshit she’s doing…boring….showing off bruises you can imagine she got getting fucked up the ass like a stray dog in a muslim country….when really probably just got them at dance practice cuz that’s the only time Jonas lets her touch him….and who fucking cares…

The real tragedy in this is why the paparazzi didn’t get a fucking ass shot…It just doesn’t make sense to me…stand on the other side of the street motherfucker and pretend you are taking pics of the buildings…I don’t now how you do it in whatever immigrant country you are from, but get it together, motherfucker..

v

Posted in:Ashley Greene

2010

23

Nov

stepLINKS of the Day

I have been busy celebrating Miley Cyrus’ birthday outside the local highschool. I wish I had a video camera because I am sure I got at least three girls pregnant with my illicit thoughts….I am drunk, it is a regular occurance in my life….like Thanksgiving is a regular occurance in your life, and every year I get more and more irritated when people wish each other a Happy Thanksgiving, like it’s a fucking birthday or some shit, when really it’s just a fucking dinner to celebrate killing off Indians who made bad real estate deals….

Here are my stepLINKS….

Paris Hilton Pantyhose Ass
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I Can’t Get Enough Of These Bitches in Oprah’s Audience Spazzing Out – VIDEO
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The Coolest THing YOu should Be Into
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Because Pulling On Out is Cheaper Than a Tuesday Night Movie
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The Man Who’s Cum is in Aguilera’s Womb
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ITS OFFICIEL!!! MILEY CYRUS IS NO LONGER JAIL BAIT!
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Amateur Cheerleader Gets HYer Masterbation On
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30 Hottest Female Athletes You’ve Never Heard Of
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Olivia Wilde See Through Hotness
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Blake Lively and Her Try Hard Tits
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Miley Celebrates Her 18th In Tight Black Leather
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Only in America: Charlie Sheen is Suing the Porn Star/Hooker He Held Hostage
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Daniela Lopes is a Dream
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Animated Gif Amazingness of the Day
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And That’s Why You Don’t Fuck With Security – VIDEO
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Pamela Knows How to Rock Lingerie
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Random Pic Dump of the Day
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Maria Milian is Kinda Amazing
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Teacher Accused Of Doing The Nasty With Student While He Was In The Hospital, She’s Also Possibly Knocked Up
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Man, Jennifer Hudson is Slimmed Down and Looking Hotter By the Day
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Jana and Suzie Know How to Make a Good Gallery
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App Turns Your Cell Phone Into Sex Toy
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Natalie Portman Hotness
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Now That’s a Gorgeous Redhead
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Mmmmmmm Abigail Clancy
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Fuck I Love Charlize Theron
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Pic Dump of the Day
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Find Girls to Fuck – Because Sex is a Two Person Activity
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Beyonce is Looking a Lot More Fit Lately
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Public Masterbator Gets Caught – VIDEO
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Striptease of the Day
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Kira, Kitty or Becky? Take Your Pic
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Gwen Loves Being Naked – VIDEO
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50 Things Every Guy Should Know How to Do
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I Wish I Were Beibng Sarcastic With the Title Kim Kardashian Attends the Opening of a Toilet But I’m Not
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Get a Load of Jeri J
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Student Knocks Up His Science Teacher – He Was Obviously Paying Attention
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Iryna Storozhuk Is A Hot Piece Of Ukrainian Ass
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Emma Watson Panty Flash On Today Show
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Who’d You Rather, Fuck Marry Or Kill?
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Kim Xerxes Kardashian Shoves Her Tits Together
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Follow Me On FACEBOOK and TWITTER

Posted in:stepLINKS

2010

23

Nov

Emma Watson Flashes Her Twat on the Today Show of the Day

I don’t know when these pics were taken….I don’t even know if you can see her wizard twat…I just know that if you are into her…than you probably do because Emma Watson fans are fucking weirdos who are a little too into things – if you know what I mean….

And if you don’t – watch this video….


To See The Rest of the Pic – Follow This Link
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Posted in:Emma Watson

2010

23

Nov

Kim Kardashian Showing Off Her Tits of the Day

I don’t know why Kim Kardashian is standing next to a tall bitch painted silver, but I think it’s a mistake…this is the reason fat chicks need to be photographed with people who are either way fatter than them, or alone but next next oversized couches, chairs or other props to make us think the bitch isn’t a fucking tractor trailer of a pussy….the second they slip up and give us an actual thing to compare them to, like this tall thin model who Kim Kardashian is a foot shorter and a foot wider than, the world learns how short and thick her body is…but luckily for her and the success of Snooki, people apparently like this kind of body, despite how small it makes your penis look while trying to enter them, because I guess fat bitches are more comfortable to cry on and less likely to leave you for lack of physical ability but more importantly cuz no one wants a fat bitch…

Posted in:Kim Kardashian

2010

23

Nov

Blake Lively’s Tits in a Push-Up Bra of the Day

Blake Lively’s figured out a good way to make me forget how awkward lookin’ her face looks, sure the strategy is pretty fucking obvious and has been used by so many tits before her, but when you wear your tits out like this, it’s like you don’t even have a face….and for Blake Lively, that’s a good thing….cuz she looks like the weird girl from elementary school who likes reading and who is allergic to peanuts….

I know she does okay with her face cuz girls love all girls they envy or think are nice, I have known girls who tell me some of the ugliest shit is beautiful because it is on a hit show they wish they were livin, or cuz the media tells them, and straight guys, despite being willing to fuck a bitch cuz she’s better than nothing doesn’t really care how stupid a bitch looks, and that push up bras isn’t necessarily key to her existance as this fashion icon, but I think it helps, mainly cuz I like lookin at tits.

Posted in:Blake Lively

2010

23

Nov

Beyonce Has Increased Sex Appeal of the Day

I can only assume Beyonce got an abortion or had a miscarriage because just a few weeks ago people were saying she was pregnant, cuz they assume her marriage to Jay Z is an actual marriage that they have sex in, when really it’s just on some strictly business level….because she is less fat than she’s been in fucking years. Maybe she’s taking the public’s advice when reporting her being pregnant as a fucking sign that it is time for her to start starving herself, maybe she’s on crystal meth, who the fuck cares, cuz she’s lookin’ good and we should take it in because normally bitch’s thighs are so thick they make me skip meals so not to end up like that, even though I am a dude and I am substantially fatter than her, but you get what I’m saying….

So I guess this Thanksgiving eve, Beyonce needs you to give thanks to Rihanna and all the attention Jay Z was giving her half naked booty shaking body, for motivating her to find her sex appeal….

Here she is proving being skinny is better than being fat leaving some event…

Here she is at another….

Here’s her banned from daytime TV cuz daytime TV isn’t smutty as hell with all the bored housewife smut they airperfume commercial if you haven’t seen it…

Posted in:Beyonce

2010

23

Nov

Paris Hilton Flashes Her Ass of the Day

Today is uninteresting. I saw these pictures of Paris Hilton’s ass in leggings getting streteched out to the point of see thru and I didn’t give a fuck, if anything I found it disgusting….


To See The Rest of the Pics – Follow This Link
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It’s not that I hate herpes on pussy, or even hate rich Socialites with no soul who figured out a way to make money of their own, it’s just that I don’t care about seeing the same bitches pull the same stunts to get noticed, especially many years after she stopped mattering. Not that she ever mattered, but there was a window of time where people thought she did…

So here are some other pictures of her shopping with some trash coke head cuz no one married to Charlie Sheen doesn’t rip lines with Charlie Sheen…but I want to make it very clear…I really don’t give a fuck.

Posted in:Paris Hilton

2010

23

Nov

stepNEWS of the Day

These are all really fucking amazing stepNEWS videos. I guess people are losing their fucking shit you know with the Holidays coming, or the boredom of fall, poverty… whatever the reason, I’m just happy it’s going on. So here are some recent crazy fucking stories…to keep you entertained while I slowly wake up.

PA teacher accused of asking student for naked photos to settle debt

Drunk OH mom runs over daughter on purpose

IN woman told to remove underwear by TSA cuz the TSA is going nuts….

Man upset son saw naked women on MegaTouch game

83-year old grandma keg stand

NY Woman Confronts Subway Flasher

Posted in:stepNEWS

2010

23

Nov

Kesha Unfortunately Sexes It Up For Complex of the Day

For those of you who read my stepLINKS, I’d like to announce that despite what I was thinking after a 15 hour nap, I’m alive…unfortunately for you I didn’t die on my own vomit as expected.

Unfortunately, I woke up to Kesha trying to be sexy…

Now I don’t have anything against Complex, if anything I love them. They featured me in their mag a few years ago in the same Dec/Jan issue, they made me feel like I had hope, and now I am trying to get them to sell my advertising for me, because I don’t know what I am doing, but unfortunately they won’t do it cuz they think my site is too racy, so I don’t blame them for covering her, I just wish they actually covered her… and I blame them for not putting her disgusting thickness in a fucking snow suit or some shit…

You see Kesha is not hot. She’s just some bullshit fake hipster because all hipsters are fake, who used to go out in LA with Katy Perry to all the hipster shows and I guess collectively decided that they should produce pop inspired from the scene they were trying to fit in.

I have pictures of them in action together before Katy Perry ran off with the dude in Gym Class Heroes who helped her launch a career, and before Katy Perry decided to bring her BFF party friend along for the ride by getting her her own album.

It’s all bullshit. It’s all marketing. These bitches have no soul and unfortunately for this post, Kesha has no sex appeal.

Here is the photoshoot video….if you look close enough you can see her dick…

Here are a couple pics….even though they shoulda stuck to just text on this cover….

To See The Rest of the Pics – Follow This Link
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Posted in:Kesha

2010

23

Nov

stepLINKS of the Day

I just slept the last 15 hours….I am sure I didn’t miss much and I am still tired so I am going back to pass the fuck out, but figured before I do, I’d put up the stepLINKS for you to entertain yourself with while my body either recovers or slowly dies in what I can only assume is telling me to chill the fuck out on the 3 day benders…

That said Happy Birthday Miley, no I’m not talking to the teen girl I pretended was Miley this weekend, her birthday’s not for another few months according to her fake ID.

Taylor Swift with Straight Hair Increases Boner Pptential by 1000
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Here’s a Look at the Hot Slut Replacing Lohan in INFERNO
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Because You Need to Get Off Today
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Katy Perry is Letting Mr Burns Motorboat Her
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Blonde Slut Flashes and Strips – VIDEO
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The 50 Greatest Quotes in Sports Movie History
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Because Who Doesn’t Like to Play With Toys?
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Nicolette Sheridan Birthday Tits
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Miley Cyrus Jailbait of the Day
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Nicole Scherzinger Let’s Us Look At Her Cleavage
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Wardrobe Malfunctions, a Gallery
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Barbara Bush Give Sarah Palin the Smackdown
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50 Spank Worthy Pics
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And That’s Why You Don’t fly a Kite Near Power Lines – VIDEO
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Very Bad Tattoos – A Gallery
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Top 10 Craziest Celebrity Mug Shots [Flicks]
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Drunk Bitch Stuck in a Dryer
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Mandy and Julie Bring the Hotness – VIDEO
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Top 5: Pornstars Before They Had Plastic Surgery
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Angelina Jolie Brings the Hotness in the Tourist
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Jessica Simpson is a (Fat) Class Act
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The woman that Every Woman Wants to Be
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Kesha is Disgusting of the Day
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Busty Teen Takes a Shower – VIDEO
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Find Girls to Fuck – Because Sex is a Two Person Activity
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Hayley Marie is a Topless Paramedic
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Drunk Chick Gets Stuck in an Dryer – VIDEO
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Public Masterbator Gets Caught
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Magic Disappearing Skateboarder – VIDEO
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Someone Tried to Kill Bristol Palin With Anthrax!!! Holy Shit hahaha
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Maggie Grace in lingerie for ‘Faster’
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Olivia Wilde Totally Sizzles In Details
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Charlie Sheen’s Hooker Breaks Down In Tears Like A Baby
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Courtney Love Violates Twitter
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I Can See Olivia Wilde’s Nipples And I Like It
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Miley Celebrates Her 18th In Tight Leather
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Follow Me On FACEBOOK and TWITTER

Posted in:stepLINKS

2010

22

Nov

Juliette Lewis Crackhead Bikini Pics of the Day

Here are some pictures of Juliette Lewis proving that hard drug use usually results in a pretty skinny and toned body and shit is a lot more fun than going the gym or trying stupid trendy diets like the master cleanse. You never see a fat crackwhore, at least I haven’t when wandering the streets looking for something to try to impregnate on the cheaps even though I know their weak, dying on the inside uteruses can’t sustain our child, that’s probably what makes it so fun, like playing some kind of real life videogame with my dick…

The unfortunate thing in all this is that I can’t help but want to contribute to her ass tattoo with my jizz.

Seriously, I never thought the day I try jerking off to Juliette Lewis and her dirty lookin’ almost 40 would come, but more importantly, I never thought I’d share that low point with anyone, it’s one of those secret people you masturbate and don’t talk about, like when you do it to your sister when she’s changing…If you know what I mean…

Posted in:Juliette Lewis

2010

22

Nov

Linnea Pihl Tits for Costume of the Day

Here is some bitch with a crazy immigrant name modeling topless for some magazine or lingerie company I didn’t bother looking up called Costume.

The nice thing about models is that you never really know how old they are because modeling agencies usually keep their birthdays secret, and modeling agencies usually do most of their recruiting when a bitch is 14, meaning for all you know, these could be some 16 year old immigrant tits being shown off for fashion, cuz the immigrant wants to do whatever it takes to get ahead, you know to live a life away from the immigrant hell she is from, that whole American dream without being an actual hooker shit, which may seem too young to already be using tits for money, but I figure it’s never too early to get started on your future financial security, especially if you manage to do it in a way that doesn’t get flagged as a kiddie pornographer, since in every other business, teenage tits is a fucking crime, even though relatively freshly sprouted teenage tits are anything but a crime….they are just perkier than adult tits….making them a small taste of heaven…not that this bitch is underage…but you just never really know and that adds enough excitement to my terminally boring existence….to go on another day.

Posted in:Linnea Pihl

2010

22

Nov

Jessica Lowndes Thick Hips in a Bikini of the Day

I had no idea Jessica Lowndes looked like this, mainly because I had no idea who Jessica Lowndes is, sure I’ve heard her name and I know she’s on 90210 the Next Generation, but I refuse to further investigate anything that bullshit lack of creativity or vision show that was put together in 4 minutes has to offer, except maybe when the stars of the shit are sitting next to me in restaurants, or when they are in bikinis…

So I had no idea how thick this Jessica Lowndes bitch was, those hips don’t fucking lie, but at least she’s got the right idea – covering herself up with a towel, doing us all a favor, cuz we have sloppy bitches of our own to pollute our minds everytime we see them naked…we don’t need some overpaid bitch doin’ it for us.

I am just amazed that this is happening to her so early on in her career, I mean it took Jessica Simpson at least a decade before her cake eating got the best of her….

Maybe she’s just pregnant.

Either way, it’s not as good as it could be, but I’m sure you’ll still like it. That whole small tits, thick hips thing really talks to you, cuz anything with a vagina does….just not in real life…cuz all vagina knows your a creep.

Posted in:Jessica Lowndes

2010

22

Nov

Pam Anderson Still Getting Work in India of the Day

I guess comebacks happen for worthless pussy who was pretty much expired in America, all it takes is a billion brown people who only have one TV station cuz they are slumdogs who find looking at what they assume is an American icon with her blonde hair and fake tits on bitches who don’t have a lot of facial hair is not really something they have in India highly erotic….

I guess it just proves that when you have nothing going for you, you might as well take the weirdest low level offer your agent pithes you, because what you thought was defining the end of your fucking career, actually got you back into the fucking game….

Now all she needs is a sextape with Dev Patel and next thing you know she’ll be a hindu bride living in a palace like Princess Jasmine, never having to worry about anything, except maybe premature death due to her hepatitis, but that shit follows her everywhere….

Posted in:Pam Anderson