I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2007

07

Jun

I am – Ivanka Trump's Big Ol' Titties and Some Paris Hilton News of the Day

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I got drunk last night. I am sure that’s a big surprise to some of you. But I was a weird kinda drunk. I am talking unable to function after 4 drinks. I was talking to some dude and didn’t hear a word he said, then accidentally dropped my beer without realizing it. I think it could have been a stroke or some shit. But needless to say, when I got home the last thing I wanted to do was talk about how Paris HIlton has been released from prison.

I am actually pretty fucking pissed off, I started writing her a letter yesterday that I was going to mail to her today and post here. I figured she’d have no choice but to read it and that would be good for the site and give us all a good fucking laugh. So when I read that bitch was released with an ankle bracelet, I was pretty much thinking to myself that I just missed a golden opportunity. But even more disappointing is that the rich motherfuckers always get special treatment. If Paris was a poor black dude from the projects and she got busted with a DUI, the authorities would have slapped 15 other charges on him and dude woulda been in lock down for 20 years with no chance of parole. But since all you cocksuckers give a fuck about this piece of trash and have given her this level of celebrity bitch doesn’t’ deserve, she has the power to change the fucking legal system to suit her cunt needs. I don’t understand why there is even a system in place when rich people are just going to always be able to do whatever the fuck they want regardless of the consequences we all have to face.

Here was the beginning of the letter that I wrote her but now won’t bother finishing because bitch is back home drinking cocktails and watching TV and doing whatever it is that she does….

Now that you backed into a corner with nothing to do but read letters from fans and I figured I’d take advantage of the opportunity to make sure you know who I am by telling you how much I love you, and by love I mean that I love that you give me constant content for my website.

Now, I’ve been a fan of your work since you hit the scene. If you’re wondering what work I am talking about, so am I. I guess you’ve never really done anything of substance, your claim to fame is a sex tape, and that’s easy to be successful at, you just need to get naked. Other than that you’ve made your money promoting products and getting paid to party, which I guess isn’t really work. You did have that book I never read, but can assume you didn’t write it and then there was simple life, which was pretty much like the sex tape only without the sex, all you had to do was go on a road trip, so maybe saying I am a fan of your work is kinda a lie because you’ve never really done much of anything but a lot of cock. I guess your impact on society’s been a good one though, there are so many young girls who rock party dresses with no panties, are down with nip slips and fucking and getting filmed fucking and I guess that’s not that bad for people like me, but it may be for them as they don’t have a huge trust fund to carry them through the rest of their lives after fucking it up trying to be you…

Here are some pictures of Ivanka Trump at some event, because she’s a little more reserved with her sluttiness. Ivanka Trump went to a good school and got a good education, she didn’t release sex tapes and spend her nights in clubs. She hasn’t really been a piece of useless trash addicted to media attention but still has a fat bank account and would still look good enough to look at naked, which isn’t saying much cuz I like seeing everyone naked, but you know what I mean….

Posted in:cleavage|Ivanka Trump|Paris Hilton|Prison|stepSTALKER|Unsorted

2007

07

Jun

I am – Ivanka Trump’s Big Ol’ Titties and Some Paris Hilton News of the Day

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I got drunk last night. I am sure that’s a big surprise to some of you. But I was a weird kinda drunk. I am talking unable to function after 4 drinks. I was talking to some dude and didn’t hear a word he said, then accidentally dropped my beer without realizing it. I think it could have been a stroke or some shit. But needless to say, when I got home the last thing I wanted to do was talk about how Paris HIlton has been released from prison.

I am actually pretty fucking pissed off, I started writing her a letter yesterday that I was going to mail to her today and post here. I figured she’d have no choice but to read it and that would be good for the site and give us all a good fucking laugh. So when I read that bitch was released with an ankle bracelet, I was pretty much thinking to myself that I just missed a golden opportunity. But even more disappointing is that the rich motherfuckers always get special treatment. If Paris was a poor black dude from the projects and she got busted with a DUI, the authorities would have slapped 15 other charges on him and dude woulda been in lock down for 20 years with no chance of parole. But since all you cocksuckers give a fuck about this piece of trash and have given her this level of celebrity bitch doesn’t’ deserve, she has the power to change the fucking legal system to suit her cunt needs. I don’t understand why there is even a system in place when rich people are just going to always be able to do whatever the fuck they want regardless of the consequences we all have to face.

Here was the beginning of the letter that I wrote her but now won’t bother finishing because bitch is back home drinking cocktails and watching TV and doing whatever it is that she does….

Now that you backed into a corner with nothing to do but read letters from fans and I figured I’d take advantage of the opportunity to make sure you know who I am by telling you how much I love you, and by love I mean that I love that you give me constant content for my website.

Now, I’ve been a fan of your work since you hit the scene. If you’re wondering what work I am talking about, so am I. I guess you’ve never really done anything of substance, your claim to fame is a sex tape, and that’s easy to be successful at, you just need to get naked. Other than that you’ve made your money promoting products and getting paid to party, which I guess isn’t really work. You did have that book I never read, but can assume you didn’t write it and then there was simple life, which was pretty much like the sex tape only without the sex, all you had to do was go on a road trip, so maybe saying I am a fan of your work is kinda a lie because you’ve never really done much of anything but a lot of cock. I guess your impact on society’s been a good one though, there are so many young girls who rock party dresses with no panties, are down with nip slips and fucking and getting filmed fucking and I guess that’s not that bad for people like me, but it may be for them as they don’t have a huge trust fund to carry them through the rest of their lives after fucking it up trying to be you…

Here are some pictures of Ivanka Trump at some event, because she’s a little more reserved with her sluttiness. Ivanka Trump went to a good school and got a good education, she didn’t release sex tapes and spend her nights in clubs. She hasn’t really been a piece of useless trash addicted to media attention but still has a fat bank account and would still look good enough to look at naked, which isn’t saying much cuz I like seeing everyone naked, but you know what I mean….

Posted in:cleavage|Ivanka Trump|Paris Hilton|Prison|stepSTALKER|Unsorted

2007

06

Jun

I am – stepLINKS of the Day

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I went to a bar the other night to drink because that’s what I do. The place was a fucking dump that was in the basement of some hotel or some shit and after getting walking right in, ignoring the line of losers and getting to the bar to order a drink I realized that I was in over my head. The drinks were a fucking rip off and I figured where the drinks are pricey the girls are hot, so even though I couldn’t afford to drink there I decided to buy a round. I was so focused on getting booze that I didn’t realize that everyone in the place was fucking ugly. After finishing my drink and walking around, I realized every girl was fucking fat and busted and dressed in tight clothes. I was fucking floored because I didn’t realize Lookin’ Good Sweethearts congregated in public places, but almost felt lucky to be part of their convention until breathing in through my nose and smelling a burning shitty cloud of fucking stink that actually made me fucking gag. On my way out of the fucking place I saw dudes actually hitting on these beasts and making out with them and hump dancing them and it was like the ugly girls were hot girls and I guess that’s why they went there. It was like a horrible fucking dream….

I hope these links bring the same feeling to your lives…

FHM Study Abroad Featuring Charlotte McKenna who is a UK Hot Slut
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Hysterical Paris Hilton Mugshot by BryanBoy…He Looks Just Like Her I don’t Know Who That is Worse For…
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Jordan Admits What Everyone Already Knew and That’s that she has a Loose Vagina and Is Getting it Rebuilt After the Baby….
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Kim Kardashian Things Her Ass Is A GIft and Shows it off in a Weird Way While Waiting for her Car
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Some Rihanna Ass While Performing
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stepHOTLINE Message Number 2 – It’s a Sad One. I don’t know how to make these steam…
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Courtney Love Lookin’ Like a Haggard Street Whore…Exclusive
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Ana Beatriz Barros Panty Picture Moment
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After Today’s Events – Here’s a Little Milk Fetish Video Action
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Selma Blair is a Man
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Vintage Lohan and Barton Ad
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Jews were Pimps in South America
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Elle Macpherson Amazing See Through Dress Because I Love Her
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Jennifer Hurt is Playboy’s June Cyber Girl
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Hysterical Birthday Strip Surprise Video You’ll Love
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Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
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Little Boy Looking Hipster Chicks Washing a Car in Their One Piece Hipster Bathing Suits
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Crazy UnSexy Dancing Chick
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Topless Chick in the Shower
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Some Transformer Stills for you Virgins
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Memories of Paris Hilton Taking a Bath in this Time Where She Spends Her Days in the Communal Shower
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Knocked Up Boobies Matchup
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Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
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Gisele Bundchen Has Obviously Never Met You
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Weirdest Lookin Bum Ever..The Fucking Thing Scares Me…
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Liv Tyler and Kate Bowsworth Kissing
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Paris Hilton’s Awkwardly Tall Brother Got Mugged
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Paris Hilton’s Prison Experience So Far – Amazing
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More Alien Porn Clips
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Ten Great Moments in Porn Comedy
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Evil Passed Out Friend Prank
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Even the Bums Can’t Believe This dude’s Slamming Aguilera
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Justin Timberlake Signs a Youtuber…I wonder when he’ll sign me…
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Kelly Osborne is the Only Living Pig in New York
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Some Air Sex For you To Love
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Another Paris Hilton Prison Porn Moment Called “Paris Learns To Give”
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Idiots Lighting Their Heads on Fire
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Girl Cries During a Porn Shoot – Then Gets Pissed On…I Don’t Get This Shit..
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Some London Olympics 2012 Logo Meets Bayside High Action – I don’t get it either…
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Herbert the Pervert From Family Guy Compilation Because He’s The Best Part of the Show….
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Hot Webcam Girl in Action Because That’s What Webcams Are For
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Knocked Up Is A Rip Off of Some Book and Bitch is Suing Cuz Everyone Always Wants a Piece
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37 Years of Joan River’s Face
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Nicole Richie Slut Hiding in Her Car Because She Cares About the People…
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Hipsters in the Bathtub…I didn’t Know Hipsters Washed
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Crazy Truck Driver But Not As Crazy As The Language They’re Speaking or the Music They’re Listening to….
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Some Ellen Rocche Chick Photoshoot Video
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Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
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Use this Spray to Get Laid
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Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2007

06

Jun

I am – Kate Hudson Nipples of the Day

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I got some slack today for posting the breastfeeding pictures and I figured this was a good opportunity to explain myself. Basically the person who wrote into me told me that my site is a porn site and posting pictures of a bitch feeding her baby is giving perverts something to jerk off to and that is morally fucking wrong because it involves a baby. The person felt that by posting these pictures, I was implying that when women feed their babies in public it is something that should get you off and by posting pictures of it, I am basically giving you fuckers the green light to jerk off to pictures with babies in them.

My response is that I do social and celebrity commentary. If I see a bitch feeding her kid in public, I am going to look. I am not going to get turned on by the fact that her tit is being sucked on by a baby, but I am going to check out what kind of tits she’s packing. I figured that if a girl pulls her tits out in the open she wants me to look. It happens so rarely in my world and if they don’t give a fuck about doing it then I am not going to give a fuck about posting them here.

I also think that if you use this site for masturbation material, you are pretty fucking weird because there’s a whole internet of hardcore porn that will probably get the job done a lot more successfully. My mission is not to get you off. I don’t post shit for the sake of turning you on. I post because I usually have something to say about the pictures, whether what I say is of substance or not, I get inspired or reminded of things I have seen and done.

The internet is filled with freakshows like hornylohanwanker who should probably be locked up even though he’s probably a school teacher or banker or some shit, but we’ll never know because he’s anonymous and that’s what the Internet is fueled by. If someone gets off to people eating, people walking, people dancing, dogs fucking, car racing, motorcycles or household appliances, they can either get of to that shit by doing a google image search on their computer behind closed doors or by going out into society and doing it there. I’d rather keep them locked up to their computer. If someone gets off to girls at the beach or girls at the waterpark or girls at the public pool, should we shut those down because of the few weirdos?

So what I am saying is that I don’t write for perverts, I don’t run a porn site, but it’s all up for interpretation and if that’s what this is to you, I can’t change that shit, just keep visiting cuz I need all the traffic I can get. I will just continue doing what I do and if that involves a slag showing the world her tits wither her baby suckin them for whatever reason and I get inspired enough to post it, I am going to post it because I am not going to censor myself or let you ruin all my fucking fun by dictating what I can or can’t do because of the freaks that are landing here.

That said, here are some pictures of Kate Hudson’s nipples and her baby who is dressed cooler than you.

Posted in:Kate Hudson|Nipples|Unsorted

2007

06

Jun

I am – Sienna Miller and Keira Knightley on the Set of their New Movie of the Day

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Here are some pictures of Sienna Miller and Keira Knightley proving that acting is such a fucking hard job and that these cocksuckers deserve to get paid millions of dollars a year for it, because frolicking in the ocean like a bunch of Autistic kids do in puddles every fucking rainy day means getting fucking paid for them, when it just makes me look like a weirdo when I do it.

If you’re in a position to change your career, I think that you should consider acting. It’s like everyday is what you would do on a vacation if you could afford to go on vacation and you get paid heavy for the shit. If you’re in action movies you get paid to pretty much experience all the most exciting things life has to offer, whether it be car chases or running from explosion or whatever. If you’re in a romantic comedy, you usually get to see a celebrity slut naked, if you’re in some drama you usually get to chain smoke and chain smoking is amazing, especially when you get paid lots of money for it and on your downtime you can spend your money, party and get addicted to cocaine and not have to worry about paying rent.

I think it’s safe to say that actors don’t need talent. I think it’s also safe to say that Sienna Miller showing off her throwback pantyhose that you’re already jerking off to and that makes me feel uncomfortable.

Posted in:Keira Knightley|On Set|Pantyhose|Sienna Miller|Unsorted

2007

06

Jun

I am – Brooke Sheenan Slutty Dress of the Day

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Brooke Sheenan is some Sports Model from Australia who won some Sports Model Search and this is what she looks like. I assume a sports model is what Australians call Fitness Models. A fitness model is pretty much not a real model but a bitch who is ripped and who spends her day in the gym and gets paid to wear spandex and bikinis for men’s magazines, shitty events, tradeshows and other useless things that make them more money than I’ll ever have. They win fitness competitions by demonstrating their aerobic ability in front of judges. They are a lot less interesting than fashion models who live off off cocaine, champagne and not eating.

Maybe I am just a bigot towards people who eat 12 egg white protein shakes before lifting more weight in a day than I have in my life. Maybe I am just jealous because of their jacked on endorphins positive outlook on life and their high energy that I find obnoxious because I can’t really keep up….I guess reality is I can never be a bigot towards a set of hot tits and an ass I can chip my tooth on provided bitch let me near her while handing out samples of Whey Protein at the next Muscle convention….

If you’re wondering why I am posting these, it’s because I can’t keep up with the other celebrity blogs, they are so on top of every set of paparazzi pictures that comes out that I can’t keep up. I am too busy doing nothing all day. My new strategy was to post pictures of people who I’ve never heard of because I can only assume no other site is up on this shit because no one gives a fuck about these people. This is my way of staying one step ahead of the game…..I am always innovating…..

Posted in:Brooke Sheehan|cleavage|Model|Unsorted

2007

06

Jun

I am – Pink Shirt Wearing Homeless Man Begging for Change of the Day

I am feeling uninspired today and I am not sure why. I heard some sad news about a fatal car accident involving someone I have known for years and a family member was lost. It really breaks my heart even though I am not close to the family. It’s one of those things that reminds us all that it’s important to be safe when you can and to try to enjoy everyday because you just never know. It is also important to put petty arguments aside and try to accept those around you for who they are and realize that we are all different, because the last thing you want is to get that dreaded life changing phone call and feel regrets about how you lived and the relationship you had.

I know that this is a horrible loss for this family and there’s nothing much an outsider like me can do or say, all the cliche and awkward things a person does say may not change the way the family feels but I am thinking about them and hoping for the best.

I know that I would be destroyed if some of the people in my life were lost and I have lost people who have been very close to me in the past and it’s always a fucking struggle. I am sure that some of you have lost people you care about and feel what I am saying. It’s hard to go on thinking things will ever go back to normal but time does heal.

So have fun, smile, take care of yourself and remember to appreciate the time you have and the people you know and love, because even as a cynic who makes fun of things everyday, even I know the importance of life.

This is a video of a drug addict lookin’ motherfucker begging for change in a pink shirt. Just to remind us that even a drug addicted homeless lookin’ motherfucker can rock the color pink like a chachi and have a little dance in his step shows us all that even though life has kinda kicked him in the ass. This may not be as cutting a post as you’re used to, but I feel sad and this is what happens when I feel sad. Love.

Posted in:Homeless|stepTV|Unsorted

2007

06

Jun

I am – Petra Nemcova Hot Tits of the Day

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Tsunami Survivor Petra Nemcova is one of those girls who is pretty decent for an eastern European chick. I know most Eastern European chicks you hear about are either models, or pornstars, or mail order brides you dream of because your rich friend’s divorced father has one and she looks like a total slut.

But reality is that these rationed toilet paper using communist slags aren’t all sexy big breasted olympic gymnast bikini models. There are a lot of them with beards, and bellies, and the ability to wrestle bears while chopping wood and giving birth all at the same time. These are the bitches named Olga or Vaclav but they don’t ever make it big here in North America, because we don’t acknowledge serious talent.

I forget where I was going with this post, but since it’s almost 4 and I’ll I’ve posted are the breast feeding pics, I’ll leave you with these pictures of her preventing an upskirt and busting out of her dress like a hot slut I’d love to take a bath with, unfortunately she’s banged Stavros, who has banged Lohan and Paris and you know what both of these bitches have festering in their panties (when they wear panties), and that’s something that I don’t really want sharing my bath water and I’d bath in a fucking puddles of piss and dirt on the corner of the street like my friend who was trying to wash off the smell of a hooker he fucked before going home to his overbearing wife one night this spring.

Either way, here are the pics.

Posted in:cleavage|Petra Nemcova|Tits|Unsorted

2007

06

Jun

I am – Maggie Gyllenhaal Breast Feeding Her Baby of the Day

IMAGES TAKEN DOWN TO PREVENT A LAWSUIT

So it turns out that Maggie Gyllenhaal is one of those bitches who think they have the right to pull their tits out in public to feed their little babies. I have always been a fan of these kinds of bitches. I remember walking in the park last year and seeing some slut who I call a slut because she was knocked and had baby sucking her pregnant titty, meaning that she really liked to fuck and when she fucked she liked it internal cumshot like the porn fetish I support. I also saw breast feeding at the coffee shop and I’ve seen it in restaurants and in malls andit seems it’s a whole movement, that’s really picking up because prior to about 2 years ago, I never saw bitches doing this.

My theory is that they don’t give a fuck because being pregnant is such a fucking bitch. You are pretty much sprawled out for many people to see your goods for over 9 months, not that many people hadn’t see this Maggie Gyllenhaal sluts good before the baby, but you know what I mean, it kinda takes away all sexual focus on those lady parts I love, and turns them into tools for their baby that they are obviously totally fucking obsessed over. It turns out that once sexy parts become tools then the person isn’t really shy about showing them off, or other people seeing them. What they don’t realize is that people like you get off to this shit.

The only real issue that I have with this whole thing, is that Maggie Gyllenhaal is about as my last shit, which I don’t really remember looking at, but remember having to wipe a whole lot, which isn’t very hot, unless you’re into scat, which you probably are. Sicko.

IMAGES TAKEN DOWN TO PREVENT A LAWSUIT

Posted in:Breastfeeding|Maggie Gyllenhaal|Nipples|Tits|Unsorted

2007

05

Jun

I am – stepLINKS of the Day

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I have decided that my new years resolution is to ask more girls to show me their tits in person. I figure that since I do it all day on the internet I am ready to take the step into the real world and randomly try getting everyday girls to pull out some tit. I am talking about the bitches who work at the grocery store, people on the street, people in cars, there are pretty much girls everywhere and a least all of them have some kind of tit and I want to see them. I was out earlier and tried to get some hot girl in a sports car with her window down to show me her tits. She was about to do it but wanted money. I offered her 20 dollars and she was about to do it but then her friend walked out and put a stop to the fun. It was stepONE of a new tomorrow and I think it’s going to get me arrested.

I suggest you do the same and send me the pics. Since I am an equal opportunity bloogger and I assume at least one of you has a vagina, you can do the same thing by asking dudes to show you their dicks. Fair is fair but the problem is the second a girl asks to see a guys dick the guy will probably expect the girl to be willing to take it in her mouth so be careful. Tits are less aggressive…unless the girl you are asking has a big ol’ boyfriend.

Either way, Click my links. I am dizzy and if you are wondering who the picture of the header guy is, the story is that this dude reads the site 3 hours a day and his buddy sent in his pic saying that he’d be honored to be my stepLINK header. I like to make people happy and I like to make simple dreams come true so #1 stepFAN thanks for reading….(update, fan #1 got mad about the whole thing, so his friend who was trying to do a nice thing, asked me to put a picture of himself up instead, I have given up on posting pictures of my 3 fans, and will go back to random funny shit I come across tomorrow. I hate drama and ruining friendships when all I am trying to do is make dreams come true…)

Some Site Interviewed me Cuz I am Amazing
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Kym Johnson from Dancing with the Stars
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Rad Girls Dog Snatching Cuz They Are Crazy
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Rad Girls Subway Pole Dancing Because They Are Crazy
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Rad Girls Pregnant Prankster Because They are Crazy
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Perez Hilton Does Vice Dos and Don’t Like He Knows What the Fuck He’s Talking About….Some People are too Fucking Ugly To Have an Opinion and Have No Fucking Business Having The Opportunity To Voice Their Stupid Fucking Opinions…
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Victoria Beckham Wearing No Pants Looking Amazing
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Christina Aguilera Wearing No Pants Lookin’ Amazing
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Katherine Heigl No Make-Up Slut
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Perez Hilton’s Troll Feet
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Paris Hilton Lesbian Prison Fantasy
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Jim Carrey and Bikini Clad Jenny McCarthy on the Beach.
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Very NSFW Chick Getting Banged While Smoking…Very NSFW….
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Hidden Gyno Cam
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Teachers Behaving Badly
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This is an Amazing Interview with Some Crazed Autistic Home Schooled Kid Socially Awkward Kid…
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Nice and Vanessa Can’t Afford a Real Bodyguard because they are Useless Celebrities So They Hire Heart Attack Man To Sit on People Who Get in Their Way
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Elisha Cuthbert Finally Lookin’ Sexy
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Britney Spears Throws a Knife at Some Dude…
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Guilia Siegal Hot in German Maxim
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TheCobraSnake Dos and Donts and Talks About Lohan Doing Coke
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Eli Roth’s 24 Inch Cock For You Sick Fucks
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23 Nights in Paris The Video
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Some Dude’s Tight Clothes Fetish That I don’t Understand…Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
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Some Dude’s Flickr Gallery of Girls He Doesn’t Know
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Paris Hilton Prison Soap
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Britney Throws a Knife at Some Motherfucker
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This Topless Chick is What Inspired Terry Richardson to Take Pics The Way He Does
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Some Girl Writes About Getting Waxed
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Some Mexican Making “Orgasmic” Sounds
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Michelle Marsh Topless in a Magazine
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Liz Claman TV Reporter’s Hard Nipples
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Drunk Nipslips
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The Art of Kissing
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Hot Belly Fetish For the Gay Fat Lovers
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Naked Nessa
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Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
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Naked and Pregnant
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Watching Girls Change Clothes
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Some Slut’s Tits Talkin About Celebrity Gossip
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The Ultimate Foot Fetish Sex Toy
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Angelina Jolie Adopts Another Baby
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Petra Nemcova and her Tits
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FleshFlick – Creepy French Guy (NSFW)
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Leann Rimes on the Cover of Shape Magazine
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Victoria Beckham In Bondage Gear
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How About a Happy Dancing Girl To Make You Realize Life Is Happy for Some People
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Lesbian Bikini Beach Party
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Emily Scott Showin’ Off Her Tits
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This is Why You Shouldn’t Pay Bums to Arm Wrestle
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Hayden Panettiere’s Cleavage
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How To Fake Semen on Photoshop
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Megan Fox Under the Hood in Transformers Showing Off Her Fucking Hot Body and Talking About Squirting….
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Yvette Lopez Photoshoot
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Kerri Russell Wet Tank Top
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Security Camera Catches Dude Shitting
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Nicole Richie Hiding From the Paparazzi
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Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
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Call the stepHOTLINE and Leave a stepMESSAGE
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Use This Spray and Get Laid Cuz They Say It Works….
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Posted in:stepLINKS|Unsorted

2007

05

Jun

I am – Homeless Man Showing His Photo Album of the Day

I spent way too much time on this fucking video that I know no one will watch. I am not very tech savvy and I couldn’t figure out how to export it. I was on the internet pretty much all day and I didn’t update my site because I was stuck doing this. You may think it’s useless but it brings a smile to my face and I guess that’s all that matters.

The story behind this is I was walking down the street and saw a crowd of people. There was some weird African lookin’ dude with some rain stick showing off a photo album to the crowd. They were pictures of him on his journeys and he was telling the stories about each picture. There were pictures of him with politicians, pictures of him with celebrities, pictures of him with the cops. It was all really strange but it wasn’t strange enough to be a daydream. I still felt compelled to show you that even homeless lookin’ motherfuckers have history too. There may be nothing funny about this post, it doesn’t always have to be funny. Asshole.

Posted in:Homeless|stepTV|Unsorted

2007

05

Jun

I am – Brooke Hogan Performing of the Day

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Nothing says I am a piece of Florida trash that would have become a stripper if my dad let me because being a stripper has been my dream for my entire cheesy slut life that when I sit alone in my room I put on assless pants and pretend that I was rocking the pole until I realized that if I became a talentless hack of a popstar with my dad’s money funding my career, I can do my stripper routine in my assless pants on stage for lots of people to see that my fat ass is less fat than it was when I started to live my fucking dream. It’s actually a typical situation for a girl who no one wanted to fuck because they thought she was worth fucking, but instead fucked her because her dad is a fucking legend in the WWF, which may not be saying much, but I know some of you would still let Hulk Hogan give you a hot oil massage, not because you are gay, but because you are lonely and human touch is something you’re yearning for….Either way, always being second lead her to emotional eating that turned her fat until she realized that she could make a name for herself and started to hit the fucking treadmill and that is my theory on this slut.

Posted in:Ass|Brooke Hogan|Cameltoe|Performing|Unsorted

2007

05

Jun

I am – Nicole Richie Hiking to Stay Fit of the Day

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Here are some Nicole Richie staying fit by Hiking in Hollywood in spandex, showing off her nasty non existent ass that I’d probably stick my dick in if I could get it up, but only because it would probably look pretty big for the first time in my life. It’s part of the reason why I used to only date girls with small hands, I thought that the contrast made me feel like more of a man but that’s not important.

What is important is that nothing screams I am a hippie lesbian who eats granola and doesn’t shave her box like a girl who hikes. They are the kind of bitches in Birkenstock sandals, cargo pants and oversized sweatshirts with some kind of University Name or Country flag embroidered across their thick lesbian chests. They rock no make-up and wear hats to cover their ratty, yet practical hair and on the back of their hiking bags they’ve got all kinds of water bottles and camping gear, I guess in case they come across some kind of hill, mountain or wooded area that needs to be conquered.

Here are those Nicole Richie Pics, I guess the shocking news is that the heat and activity didn’t kill her, sometimes when answering emails too quickly I get hot flashes and my heart starts going insane…maybe no eating is the key to healthy living….

Posted in:Ass|Exercise|Nicole Richie|Unsorted

2007

05

Jun

I am – Michelle Marsh in a Bikini By The Pool of the Day

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I know that some of your fuckers are major sports fans because your lives are seriously lacking something and you like the distraction. When you are bored you are either looking up sport stats to bet on the games or looking up pictures of blonde chicks with big fake tits to jerk off to. The reason I know that you assholes like sports is because I get emails about how I don’t do enough sports content, but the blonde chicks with fake tits are what keep you coming back. I think Michelle Marsh is up on this shit and realizes that the key to her success now that she’s already showed us all her big fake tits is to hit up the sports market by wearing a British soccer bikini, because even if England isn’t your team at least you sports fanatics can pretend she’s into watching the game while drinking a beer with you. It’s got nothing to do with the fact that she’s probably already fucked 3/4 of the team.

If you’re wondering why I was never into team sports, it’s simple. I suck at them. I don’t understand wasting time trying to kick balls or shoot baskets or throw touchdowns, I think it’s a distraction from what’s important and that is getting drunk. I think that working with a bunch of dudes towards menial success like winning is just a way to trick yourself that you have purpose. Reality is that the local pick-up game doesn’t mean shit in the grand scheme of the world. That’s not to say that what I spend my time doing does have any kind of impact, but at least I am wallowing in self-pity while drunk, instead of tricking myself into thinking I am good at something because I ended up on the team with the Ethiopian dude who can run faster than a cheetah because he spent his life running away from Cheetahs who tried to eat him. I guess the other reason I hate sports is the whole gay factor of a group of men in the shower and slapping each other’s asses in a testosterone rage and there is the small issue with me not being physically fit enough to walk up a flight of stairs. Hard living motherfucker, it takes it’s toll….

Either way, Here’s Michelle Marsh Manipulating You in a Bikini.

Posted in:Bikini|Michelle Marsh|Sports|Unsorted

2007

05

Jun

I am – Heather Locklear trying to Prevent a Vagina Slip of the Day

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Heather Locklear may be old, but she’s a good kind of old. She’s the type of old who has a lot of money and very little to do. I don’t think she’s been on TV or in Movies in the last 5 years, but for some reason is so vain that she spends her days with personal trainers and diet coaches to ensure that she’s still got some work in her. Maybe the reason she does that is because she built her career on being the hot blonde bitch guys wanted to fuck and got casted in whatever the fuck she’s done to try to lure in male audiences so we could tolerate her useless shows while our wives and girlfriends made us watch them. That pressure is a good thing, because she doesn’t want to retire and is maintaining that sex appeal. I guess it’s working because when I look at these pictures I get annoyed that she’s taking preventative measures to not expose too much….I guess what she doesn’t realize is that if a little panty saw the light of day, every fucking blog would be up on this shit and she’d be the topic of discussion at the water cooler in an office near you, possibly landing her the role of a lifetime.

I was at the stripclub this weekend because I accidentally joined a bachelor party that was walking by me while downtown. I was trying to get a few dollars to buy beer and they liked me enough to invite me along. They were drunk and when the bachelor got on stage to be humiliated, the strippers took all their contempt for me grabbing at them out on him. He ended up completely naked and I had never seen that kind of abuse during one of these shows. Dude was drunk and ended up pushing a stripper to the ground and running off stage, tripping, and landing on me naked. It was an interesting way to meet the guy I was partying for. Either way, there were 2 young chicks from New York there with their boyfriends, both were hot and part of the Britney Spears, Paris Hilton, Lohan generation where being a slut is cool. They were so into the stripping that when my new found friends asked if they would give him a lap dance, they said sure. I ended up tagging along to the booth with them because I don’t give up any opportunity to see non-strippers in a strip club strip. I watched them dance around for 2 songs and all bitch did was show us her fucking bra. I kept asking for some nipple or ass and they weren’t having it. They were a lot like Heather Locklear holding back on all of us, and I guess the only think I can say is that it is a pretty frustrating and disappointing feeling. Cocktease.

Bonus – A Girls Aloud Chick Preventing a Getting Out of the Car Upskirt….and A Girls Aloud Chick Having a Total Upskirt

Posted in:Girls Aloud|Heather Locklear|Unsorted|Upskirt