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Archive for the Bikini Category

2009

07

Oct

The Russell Simmons Wallet Fucker in Her Bikini Again of the Day

6 Comments »

I am pretty sure this bitch is calling the paparazzi to tip them off where and when she will be in her bikini with Russell Simmons, because that’s the whole point of lowering herself to fucking an washed up old man who she struggles to take seriously because his bald head makes him look like an adult baby and his lisp makes it a real struggle to not think he’s two and a fucking half years old every time he talks.

Pretty much making the whole experience a fucking joke, except for the fact that he’s almost a billionaire and could offer her the good life, but I know bitches and bitches are all the same and the good life is okay, but it is a whole lot better if it comes with fame of their own, cuz they all love being the center of attention and without the paparazzi, it’s just a life with nice things, when all she really wants is dudes she doesn’t know jerking off to her.

It’s this whole “I want to be the prettiest bullshit where girls want to be me and guys want to be in me” that you find in girls who try to work their way to the top by getting on top of celebrity, or high powered cock.

Basically, what I am trying to say is she is a whore with an agenda and that agenda is probably to become a household name and Simmons just happens to be the vehicle that will get her there and a solid back-up plan if she’s smart enough to marry him as it will finance the rest of her life after divorcing the motherfucker, just because you can never have too much free money and the only person she has to thank for this great life is her pussy.

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Bikini|Russell Simmons|Wallet Fucker

2009

06

Oct

Ashley Greene Bikini Pics Are Doin The Rounds of the Day

7 Comments »

Ashley Greene is some bitch from Jacksonville Florida, or what I call the land of opportunity and if you’re a loser who is not a 13 year old girl but into the same things as 13 year old girls, you will know her from the Twilight movies….

Truth is that being into the same thing as 13 year old girls isn’t that bad of strategy to get laid. If you get into what 13 year olds are into now, it gives you something to talk about now, planting the seed and developing a bit of a friendship so that by the time they turn 18 they’ll be willing to sleep with you because you’ve been such a cool, involved, personable neighbor all these years…. but it may just end up getting you arrested, you know after your hormones get the best of you and decide you can’t wait the 5 years and need pussy now, forcing you to crawl in bed with her late at night when she’s having a slumber party in a tent she pitched in her backyard, or worse, pullin out your boner and jerking off while she’s practicing her dance routine for school in the park across the street, you sick fuck.

I don’t know if these pics are old or new, I just figured I’d post them cuz everyone else is and fitting in is something I always dream about….but never works out cuz all the bitches I get with have big pussies….or maybe I just have a small penis..

Posted in:Ashley Greene|Bikini

2009

05

Oct

Katrina Bowden Still in a Bikini of the Day

3 Comments »

The NBC execs are still trying to trick you into watching 30 Rock and it may or may not be working, because bitch is in these bikini pictures and although she doesn’t have very nice full lips or a bouncy booty I’d want to watch pop, she’s not fat and since that is so rare in America, that makes her good enough to get excited over and by excited over I mean she’s worth jerking off all over even if she’s not all that special or all that famous or successful and is just one step up from a nobody…

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Bikini|Katrina Bowden

2009

05

Oct

Katrina Bowden and her Zebra Print Ass of the Day

2 Comments »

I refuse to watch anything that has to do with Saturday Night Live because I hate that fucking show. So I’ve never bothered with the Tina Fey show 30 Rock and never fucking will. I don’t like ugly women to begin with and although appreciate that they brought this piece of pussy on board to distract us from the scar on her face, I still won’t get sucked into the shit, even if they are trying to become the next Seinfeld in ratings by sending her on trips with her ugly friends to get paparazzi on her ass so that she becomes a household everyone wants to fuck and in turn, who everyone will watch on this bullshit SNL spinoff shit all you assholes love.

Here are pics of her flashing some ass…

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Ass|Bikini|Katrina Bowden

2009

29

Sep

Jennifer Ellison Pregnant Tits in a Bikini Pics of the Day

4 Comments »

I have a thing for pregnant chicks, even though I don’t have a thing for chicks I’ve got pregnant, and I actually have more of a thing for abortions or miscarriages, but when I know a girl has given up on the condition of her vagina and her body, and I know she really had taken the plunge, I realize that I need to celebrate that vagina in its final moments, so here’s some bitch named Jennifer Ellison I don’t really know or give a fuck about in some bikini pics from a tabloid, because it’s safe to say we’re nearing the end of her career so think of this as the tribute her you’d see next to her urn at her funeral, because let’s face it, the end is pretty much here and although she’s not dead, her sex appeal pretty much is. So look at her tits in all their glory as one last tribute even though it won’t be the last time you see them, but it is all downhill from here, not that it matters since I have no idea who she is, I just used my generic pregnant chick post for this.

Posted in:Bikini|Jennifer Ellison|Pregnant|Tits

2009

27

Sep

Sophie Monk Bikini Titty Slip of the Day

5 Comments »

Sophie Monk released some posed bikini pictures with her nipple exposed. Her quest to fame is getting more and more desperate and that is a good thing because it means more and more nudity.

This is the kind of post that is pretty much hot enough to make my day and I don’t mean make my day in personal celebrity sexual fetish satisfaction, because I hate celebrities, but in terms of posting pictures of celebrities on the internet for idiots who still like reading and seeing pictures of celebrities, because apparently there are still some of you out there. Meaning I don’t have to post anything else today because we’ve got pretty much all we need with Sophie Monk tit.

This post may even be the post of the fuckin’ week since celebrity nudity is drying up almost as fast as Sophie Monk’s career, but before it fully fades into obscurity, she’s willing to pull all kinds of stunts, trying all she can to remind us she is still around, and it is workng because with a dry career comes a wet pussy in effort to lube up opportunities and by opportunity I mean producer cock.

I guess I technically never have to post, it’s not like this is my fucking job or anything, it’s just what I do to remind myself that living my own life is a waste of time when I can post pictures of other assholes who I fucking hate, despite the fact that I’d totally fuck….

Pics via FAME

Posted in:Bikini|Nipple|Sophie Monk

2009

23

Sep

Lil Kim Fat Tits in a Bikini, I Think, of the Day

3 Comments »

I can’t really figure this shit out, Lil Kim looks fucking disgusting and I know I some of you used to masturbate to the lyrics of her songs and now you can masturbate to pictures of her fat tits spilling out of a bikini top while the rest of her is covered, because like all good black women, she’s taken up eating biscuits instead of sucking hip hop cock for record deals. I guess everyone loses their drive at some point, I’ve been lucky enough to have never had one making my slow decent into the pits of hell a pretty easy transition, since there was no fall from any top….

Either way, here are pictures of the beaches in Miami lookin’ a hell of a lot more depressing than the one time I was down there and 6 jewish grandmothers decided to tan topless for the old country or some shit right in front of my face…but then again 6 topless grandmothers is always pretty fucking hot especially when they are Jewish cuz everyone knows Jewish girls are nice and busty….

Pics via INFphoto

Posted in:Bikini|Lil Kim

2009

16

Sep

Miranda Kerr and Her Bikini Pictures of the Day

3 Comments »

Here are some pictures of Miranda Kerr in her bikini, which is really exciting considering she’s a fuckin’ bikini model and we’ve seen it all before….getting excited over these pictures is like getting excited watching the garbage man pick up the trash, only a little more understandable and a little less creepy, here are some of the pics…

Posted in:Bikini|Miranda Kerr

2009

15

Sep

Adrianne Curry’s Bikini Tits from Twitter of the Day

1 Comment »

I started following Adrianne Curry on Twitter for no real reason because I write on Twitter but don’t read what other people write on Twitter. I have a hard enough time reading my email, or my text messages, or Get Well Soon cards from 4 years ago, so I don’t understant why these motherfuckers would create this bullshit to make me fucking work, but it turns out that this bitch posts pictures of her fake tits in her bikini from the angle her whore self sees, and I guess that’s exciting to some people, not because they are fans of Adrianne Curry, but because they like fake tits and don’t realize they can get a pair of their own implanted into their chests to give them something to do while playing football, because no one ever talks about the dude who got implants cuz he lost a bet back in the 90s, and that’s a real crime to his innovation….

Either way, I guess this Adrianna Curry bitch likes tanning and wasting away on the beach because she’s got nothing better to do with herself and I guess I’m not complaining, cuz that would be really not straight of.

Posted in:Adrianna Curry|Bikini|Tits|Twitter

2009

11

Sep

Esti Ginzborg Israeli Bikini Model in a Bikini in Israel of the Day

2 Comments »

Her name is Esit Ginzborg and she is an Israeli model who was recently in Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue. So she’s young and up and coming and she spends her life in a bikini on the beaches of Tel Aviv and she looks pretty hot to me.

I figured I’d post her pictures in honor of September 11, because you’d think living in Israel she’d would actually have a right to fear terrorism since it’s in her backyard and a regular thing, but I guess she isn’t as theatrical as Americans are with their terrorism, you know from money making TV specials to Amber alerts and serious racism towards Arabs, and instead she is bein’ laid back and kickin’ it on the fuckin’ beach, a lesson some of you should learn from…..because you can’t live in fucking fear, except of AIDS after the condom breaks when fucking hookers…

Another lesson you can learn from September 11th, it is that working kills.

Pics via SplashNews

Posted in:Bikini|Esti Ginzborg|Israel|Tel Aviv