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Archive for the Fat Category

2007

24

Oct

I am – Hoping that Sarah Michelle Gellar Didn’t Get it from Her Momma of the Day

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Here’s an obvious post, but worth everyone’s attention, because that whole Will.I.Am shit is hitting the radio harder than I hit my kids. I don’t actually have kids, but the song is about having a hot body like your momma or some shit and it is annoying, but everyone always says before marrying a chick, take a close look at their mother because that’s what you are in store for. I guess Freddie Prinze Jr. didn’t get that life lesson in riding off your dead dad’s fame school or maybe he did but ignored it because marrying bitch was a career move than one from the heart but I am just hoping that Sarah Michelle Gellar didn’t get her from her momma, because she looks like a fucking troll and trolls have limited sex appeal. Either way Freddie Prinze Jr. is in for a fucking ride and by ride I mean the throwing up part of amusement parks and not so much the fun part of them, which is obviously pickin’ up teenage sluts, because the only girls your age who go to amusement parks are on lame dates with lame dudes who have already exhausted taking them to dinner and movies and every other cliche idea he saw in Romantic Comedies when researching pussy.


Related Posts:

Sarah Michelle Gellar’s Bra in 1993
Sarah Michelle Gellar’s Lonely Bikini Hot Tub Party
Freddie Prinze Jr Steps in Dog Shit

Posted in:Fat|Mom|Sarah Michelle Gellar|Troll|Unsorted

2007

24

Oct

I am – Hoping that Sarah Michelle Gellar Didn't Get it from Her Momma of the Day

sarah_michelle_gellar_momma_top.jpg

Here’s an obvious post, but worth everyone’s attention, because that whole Will.I.Am shit is hitting the radio harder than I hit my kids. I don’t actually have kids, but the song is about having a hot body like your momma or some shit and it is annoying, but everyone always says before marrying a chick, take a close look at their mother because that’s what you are in store for. I guess Freddie Prinze Jr. didn’t get that life lesson in riding off your dead dad’s fame school or maybe he did but ignored it because marrying bitch was a career move than one from the heart but I am just hoping that Sarah Michelle Gellar didn’t get her from her momma, because she looks like a fucking troll and trolls have limited sex appeal. Either way Freddie Prinze Jr. is in for a fucking ride and by ride I mean the throwing up part of amusement parks and not so much the fun part of them, which is obviously pickin’ up teenage sluts, because the only girls your age who go to amusement parks are on lame dates with lame dudes who have already exhausted taking them to dinner and movies and every other cliche idea he saw in Romantic Comedies when researching pussy.


Related Posts:

Sarah Michelle Gellar’s Bra in 1993
Sarah Michelle Gellar’s Lonely Bikini Hot Tub Party
Freddie Prinze Jr Steps in Dog Shit

Posted in:Fat|Mom|Sarah Michelle Gellar|Troll|Unsorted

2007

01

Oct

I am – Jennifer Aniston’s Bikini Pictures of the Day

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I overheard some people talking about Jennifer Aniston and Angelina the other day, they were fighting about who was hotter and I was surprised people still even bother arguing that shit. You’d think people have better things to do with their time than talk about people they don’t know, then I remembered that’s what I do everyday on this site, but since my life is a walking contradiction and I am probably the most inconsistent person out there and have nothing better to do, I still think arguing that shit is a waste of fucking time because it’s obvious the Angelina destroys this 4 day old Greek Salad of a bitch.

But really, who fucking cares who is hotter, hotness isn’t important, there are so many hot chick in the world and everyone’s into different shit that we should be caring about who’s a better fuck, and the fact that Brad Pitt left his marriage for Angelina, pretty much sums that up for all of us. Sure Aniston was a ass loving greek but anyone can take it up the ass, even you, and what guys want is a girl who begs for that shit like if she doesn’t get it she’ll fucking curl up and die.

You see finding a decent lookin’ chick who is in love with dick more than she’s in love with herself is harder than finding a hot chick I’d like to fuck because I see them every time I leave my house. A girl who doesn’t care if she’s seen as a slut and who loves fucking like a whore, who is addicted to dick and always wants yours is really what we are lookin’ for. So when lookin’ at whether Angelina or Aniston is hotter, you should really be focusing on who’s a better fuck because if you ask any dude if he’d rather a hot chick who blows you the fuck away in bed, or a bikini model who just lays there and takes it, motherfucker will probably take the one who knows how to fuck. Super models are good for your public image and ego, but when you’re locked down in your bedroom getting the best sex of your life, who gives a fuck about public image because you haven’t left your house in days….

Point of all this is that you’ll never get the supermodel frigid bitch or the cute sex addicted chick, so you don’t even have to worry about any of this shit, you can just sit there and jerk off to your 16 year old neighbor and her friends sunbathing, or put all your energy into the fat retarded chick in your class with the glass eye, who thinks you’re funny when ever you talk to her and she’s already asked you to fuck her but you’re too scared of vagina to go through with it…or you could focus on making some serious changes so that you get whatever the fuck you want and it’s really just a matter of having lots of money because hot chicks like money and do dirty things to be with guys with money.

Here are some pictures of Orlando Bloom and Jennifer Aniston in a bikini, because he’s probably slammin’ her, even though he could have any 20 year old party slut he wants…but maybe washed up old ladies who aren’t good enough for Brad Pitt with lots of money is what he wants….maybe he’s living out his Aniston Fantasy from when he used to jerk off to her hard nipples on FRIENDS, but I think you’re the only person who did that. Weirdo.


Related Posts:

Jennifer Aniston Bending Over in a Bikini Pictures
Jennifer Aniston Paddle-Surfing Like a Fag in a Bikini Top Pictures
Jennifer Aniston’s Hard Nipple Pictures
Jennifer Aniston Throwback Bikini Pictures

Posted in:Bikini|Fat|Jennifer Aniston|old|Tits|Unsorted

2007

01

Oct

I am – Jennifer Aniston's Bikini Pictures of the Day

jennifer_aniston_bikini3.jpg
jennifer_aniston_bikini4.jpg

I overheard some people talking about Jennifer Aniston and Angelina the other day, they were fighting about who was hotter and I was surprised people still even bother arguing that shit. You’d think people have better things to do with their time than talk about people they don’t know, then I remembered that’s what I do everyday on this site, but since my life is a walking contradiction and I am probably the most inconsistent person out there and have nothing better to do, I still think arguing that shit is a waste of fucking time because it’s obvious the Angelina destroys this 4 day old Greek Salad of a bitch.

But really, who fucking cares who is hotter, hotness isn’t important, there are so many hot chick in the world and everyone’s into different shit that we should be caring about who’s a better fuck, and the fact that Brad Pitt left his marriage for Angelina, pretty much sums that up for all of us. Sure Aniston was a ass loving greek but anyone can take it up the ass, even you, and what guys want is a girl who begs for that shit like if she doesn’t get it she’ll fucking curl up and die.

You see finding a decent lookin’ chick who is in love with dick more than she’s in love with herself is harder than finding a hot chick I’d like to fuck because I see them every time I leave my house. A girl who doesn’t care if she’s seen as a slut and who loves fucking like a whore, who is addicted to dick and always wants yours is really what we are lookin’ for. So when lookin’ at whether Angelina or Aniston is hotter, you should really be focusing on who’s a better fuck because if you ask any dude if he’d rather a hot chick who blows you the fuck away in bed, or a bikini model who just lays there and takes it, motherfucker will probably take the one who knows how to fuck. Super models are good for your public image and ego, but when you’re locked down in your bedroom getting the best sex of your life, who gives a fuck about public image because you haven’t left your house in days….

Point of all this is that you’ll never get the supermodel frigid bitch or the cute sex addicted chick, so you don’t even have to worry about any of this shit, you can just sit there and jerk off to your 16 year old neighbor and her friends sunbathing, or put all your energy into the fat retarded chick in your class with the glass eye, who thinks you’re funny when ever you talk to her and she’s already asked you to fuck her but you’re too scared of vagina to go through with it…or you could focus on making some serious changes so that you get whatever the fuck you want and it’s really just a matter of having lots of money because hot chicks like money and do dirty things to be with guys with money.

Here are some pictures of Orlando Bloom and Jennifer Aniston in a bikini, because he’s probably slammin’ her, even though he could have any 20 year old party slut he wants…but maybe washed up old ladies who aren’t good enough for Brad Pitt with lots of money is what he wants….maybe he’s living out his Aniston Fantasy from when he used to jerk off to her hard nipples on FRIENDS, but I think you’re the only person who did that. Weirdo.


Related Posts:

Jennifer Aniston Bending Over in a Bikini Pictures
Jennifer Aniston Paddle-Surfing Like a Fag in a Bikini Top Pictures
Jennifer Aniston’s Hard Nipple Pictures
Jennifer Aniston Throwback Bikini Pictures

Posted in:Bikini|Fat|Jennifer Aniston|old|Tits|Unsorted

2007

25

Sep

I am – Jamie Lynn Spears Goes to Acting Classes of the Day

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Here are some pictures of Jamie Lynn Spears going to acting classes, reality is that Jamie Lynn Spears should be going to a personal trainer. Bitch is looking pretty fucking sloppy and sloppy girls aren’t good.

I remember bringing home this chick who looked alright dressed. We ordered some food and as she ate it shit dripped all over her outfit like the slob she turned out to be. It was gross, but I didn’t care, I wanted to see her tits and this was a good excuse for me to get her shirt off, that was before she actually took her shirt off and I was faced with the strongest push-up bra built, because the second it came off, this girl who I thought was tight bodied, had nipples that aimed to the floor…..I am talking tits a mother of 3 probably doesn’t even have, that just kinda hung off her like a half full bag of milk. I still let her get me off, because I have no standards, but I was thinking how gross her tits were the whole time.

Reality is that I know Jamie Lynn is a teenager, but that means she should be more tight bodied now than she will be 5 years down the road, but I guess things shift and maybe she just hasn’t lost her babyfat yet. That was my wife’s excuse for her belly for the last 30 years of her obese life…I keep telling her “bitch, it’s not fucking babyfat, it’s called you’re a disgusting pig who doesn’t stop eating fat”, but she doesn’t listen. I think it’s just a matter of time before she follows the family tradition of eating fast food and cheetos, marrying losers, having 2 kids she hates, ending up on drugs, washed up and unable to land any work all by the time she’s 20, because the younger generation a growing up a lot faster these days. The other day I walked in on two 14 year olds ripping lines while getting blowjobs in the club bathroom….

I guess she’s trying to break her destined fate, but going to see an acting coach, but I don’t think any acting coach good enough can save a Spears. She’s just riding Britney’s tailwind, which is probably something that doesn’t smell as nice as it sounds and its worked up until now and I’d be surprised if she ever gets cast in anything decent. She’s just another white trash high school drop out with a dream, like this whore I once knew who was missing half her teeth but always wanted to be a pastry chef. She took a few of the classes, maybe even finished the program, but within 2 years, bitch was back on the streets, there just wasn’t as much money or sense of achievement in making desserts as there was in making dudes bust.

Point of this post is to say, is it say, I think it’s illegal to post about girls who are under 18. I can only hope she sues me.


Related Posts:

Britney Spears TIt in Public Picture
Britney Spears Swims Topless
Britney Spears Comeback Performance
Britney’s Pussy that Isn’t Even Her Pussy Picture

Posted in:Big Ass|Fat|Jamie Lynn Spears|Slob|Sloppy|Unsorted

2007

24

Sep

I am – Meg White Sex Tape of the Day

I am a little slow moving today with the whole being hung over and having a site that crashes more than Lohan driving drunk and high in her benz, but who really needs to be fast on this Meg White sex tape shit. Bitch is a fucking pig and always left me feeling uneasy. I never found her hot, so watching her get fucked isn’t really hot either. The only time I would want to see her get fucked is on stage by her brother, but that’s just because I am convinced they bang. Otherwise why would he let her in his band? You never do see the dude in the videos face…That said, who really knows if this is even Meg White, I don’t think anyone has looked at her long enough to know what she looks like, they just see a brunette fat chick and assume….

Either way, she’s a bad lay but takes the load inside her like any self-respecting woman should, provided she’s into STDs and unwanted pregnancy….which I am but only because there’s just something exciting about waiting it out for the month in uncertainty. You know that excitement that hits when your girl tells you she’s got her period, even though that only lasts about 3 minutes until you realize that she’s probably not going to let you fuck her for the next week, unless you have a cool chick who’s into period sex and you don’t mind the mess.

Speaking of mess, here’s that video, listen to her pant, then fuck yourself. Sicko.


Related Posts:

Noelia Sex Tape

Posted in:Ass|Creampie|Fat|Internal Cumshot|Meg White|Sex Tape|Tits|Unsorted

2007

12

Sep

I am – Jennifer Love Hewitt at the Beach of the Day

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This are probably some of the most misleading pictures I’ve seen in a while and that is why I am posting them. When I saw the caption of Jennifer Love Hewitt at the beach, I figured they were some slutty bikini pictures, but that was before I remembered that this bitch is a bigger prude than this none I once knew who used to be a whore but found Jesus. She gave up fucking for money , but she did let us peak up her habit every once in a while, I guess because once you’re a slut, you’re pretty much always a slut….even after finding Jesus.

Either way, bitch is on the beach, bitch is fully clothed and bitch is fatter than she’s ever been. It’s the typical story of the young small framed girl with huge tits who ends up hefty 10 years later, because her tits are so out of proportion that the ass feels like it needs to catch up or some shit…Reality is that all this girl ever had going for her was her body because her face was always a wreck, and now that the body is gone, I guess that means she’s dead to all of us….

I am not always mean to fat chicks because I am a model citizen. I don’t help old ladies cross the street, I don’t volunteer and I don’t have a job or contribute to the world in any way. I am not a big brother or a big sister, I am not an activist and I don’t have a cause, I am not trying to change the world, I don’t recycle but I did hold a door open for a at lady I almost slammed it on because my brain blocks out every girl I don’t want to fuck. It’s like I can be in a room with 10 girls and only see the hot ones, the ugly ones don’t even register. Either way, I apologized to the woman for not seeing her but I couldn’t help saying “I bet you don’t hear that often” because she’s fat and takes up the same amount of space as 2 people. It may have been a bad joke, it may take away from the nice model citizen act of kindness of holding the door open for a woman whos hands were full with 2 boxes of donuts and it may make me an asshole, but at least it made me laugh.

Here are those Jennifer Love on the Beach Pics for you remember something that once wasn’t a fat chick with a camera.


Related Posts:

Jennier Love Hewitt’s Birthing Hips and Big TIts Pictures
Jennifer Love Hewitt’s Dumpy and Stumpy Pics
Jennifer Love Hewitt’s Fat Ass Pictures
Jennifer Love Hewitt Emotionally Eating in a Bikini
Jennifer Love Hewitt’s Bikini Pictures Before She Was Fat

Posted in:Ass|Beach|Fat|Jennifer Love Hewitt|Unsorted

2007

10

Aug

I am – Hayden Panettiere Eating of the Day

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I am not some gay guy who likes to encourage my female friends to not eat because I want to have an anorexic looking sluts as my fashion accessory, I prove that everyday with my wife who is fucking fat but I still stick by her, but maybe I should have been one and it would have prevented the biggest headache of my life.

I didn’t miss having to wipe her ass for her while I was on my trip. I guess the issue is that in life you make choices and as a loyal and committed guy I am forced to stick by her in these final years of her life and if that means wiping her fat ass, or helping her apply topical cream to her rashes caused by bacteria build-up in all those hard to reach areas that are buried beneath her obesity, then I guess I am going to have to tough it out.

I do know that on the trip I found my erection that I had lost so many years ago. It only made a minor appearance but I was fucking blown away and blame the fact that I wasn’t being turned off women by having to be the orderly around here and had time to really absorb what real pussy is like first hand.

Hayden Panettiere is a little troll of a girl who probably should lay off the food a little bit if she ever wants people jerking off to her like they did to Lohan because fat is not hot and it can turn a man impotent and that’s my lesson for today. The other lesson is that if you’re a celebrity and you’re eating a breakfast buffet, you may want to lay off the peanut butter, even if watching you trying to get it off the top of the top of your mouth like a dog, is like porno to me, reality is my wife gained 10 pounds in one week because she had coupons to an all you can eat breakfast place and bitch took those fuckers for a ride and lead me to writing Jiffy a letter about potentially sponsoring her talent to finish off two tubs of that shit in one sitting. Either way, this posts sucks and so do you. Cuddles.


Related Posts

I am – Hayden Panettiere Pickin’ Wedgie Then Licking Hand of the Day
GO

I am – Hayden Panettiere See Through Dress of the Day
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I am – Hayden Panettiere Lickin’ Ass of the Day
GO

I am – Hayden Panettiere Bikini Pictures of the Day
GO

Posted in:Eating|Fat|Hayden Panettiere|Unsorted

2007

27

Jun

I am – Lohan’s Pot Belly Takes a Walk of the Day

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Another day in summer camp, or celebrity rehab, or whatever the fuck Lohan is doing in efforts to clean up her image and today’s activity involves going on a hike with friends and smelling the fucking roses. It’s a hard life when you’re young, rich and think of yourself as so fabulous even though your hurting on the inside and self-medicating, crashing cars and slutting yourself out.

Lohan seems to have let herself go, I guess the lack of cocaine that I bet she’s still doing in the comfort of her rehab center that is probably provided by the staff, because she’s not really in there to get better, she’s in there to look like she’s getting better, but she’s still rockin’ a gut, so I guess there giving her food.

I am not about to call her fat, because my wife is fat and I know fat in ways you never want to know fat, but I will say that she’s fat for a celebrity and that she’s giving the girls some pretty negative example by showing off that quitting drugs and booze makes a bitch lose all of her sexual appeal, leading me to believe that being on drugs and booze made Lohan a better fuck and now that it’s all over she’s gone to shit….So I guess the lesson of the day is to stay on drugs.

It is hot outside, I just woke up and I got no fucking stories worth telling….I’ll keep trying though.

Posted in:Fat|Hiking|Lindsay Lohan|Rehab|Unsorted

2007

27

Jun

I am – Lohan's Pot Belly Takes a Walk of the Day

lohan_hiking5.jpg

Another day in summer camp, or celebrity rehab, or whatever the fuck Lohan is doing in efforts to clean up her image and today’s activity involves going on a hike with friends and smelling the fucking roses. It’s a hard life when you’re young, rich and think of yourself as so fabulous even though your hurting on the inside and self-medicating, crashing cars and slutting yourself out.

Lohan seems to have let herself go, I guess the lack of cocaine that I bet she’s still doing in the comfort of her rehab center that is probably provided by the staff, because she’s not really in there to get better, she’s in there to look like she’s getting better, but she’s still rockin’ a gut, so I guess there giving her food.

I am not about to call her fat, because my wife is fat and I know fat in ways you never want to know fat, but I will say that she’s fat for a celebrity and that she’s giving the girls some pretty negative example by showing off that quitting drugs and booze makes a bitch lose all of her sexual appeal, leading me to believe that being on drugs and booze made Lohan a better fuck and now that it’s all over she’s gone to shit….So I guess the lesson of the day is to stay on drugs.

It is hot outside, I just woke up and I got no fucking stories worth telling….I’ll keep trying though.

Posted in:Fat|Hiking|Lindsay Lohan|Rehab|Unsorted