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Archive for the Sex Tape Category

2008

18

Jul

Gina Lisa Lohink’s Germany’s Next Top Model’s Sex Tape of the Day

This Gina Lisa Lohink was on Heidi Klum hosted Germany’s Next Top Model and that’s the reason you have no idea who she is. She didn’t make it through to the finals, but ended up landing some kind of career working on a travel show but I guess the blow to her ego that she lost left her unsatisfied. German’s aren’t good losers, so she took the Paris Hilton school of fame by releasing a sex tape to become a household name.

So somewhere out there, a video of this bitch in PVC sucking off her boyfriend is floating around, I don’t have it, but I do have these nude pics of her. The truth is when I heard a German Next Top Model had a sex tape, I was expecting a little more than PVC wearing blowjobs, that shit is tame. I thought German’s were fucked up militant freaks who consider missionary position when you shove a loaded gun down each other’s throats, cuddling is when you shit on each other’s faces and doggy style meant gas chambering some Jews, Fags and Retards.

I just have a couple of the nude pics, they are good enough for a Friday.

Posted in:Gina Lisa Lohink|Sex Tape

2008

14

Jul

Ashley Dupre’s Got a Sex Tape of the Day


The goverenor’s favorite escort has a sex tape or something that could be a sex tape but all they’ve released are clips of her rubbin’ one out. If you’ve always wondered what high class escort vagina looks like, because you’ve been paying for table scrap hookers, who don’t hide the fact that they suck dick for money by labeling themselves high class, when there’s nothing high class about whoring yourself out.

Either way, here’s your chance to check her out at a price you can afford and after seeing this, I know I’d be feeling some serious buyer’s remorse if I was the govenor and I’d refund like the time I hired a whore to suck me off bareback and after getting the money threw a condom on, which didn’t work for me and led to a serious fight with some crackhead I assume was her pimp. I ended up pistol whipped and broken nosed, and her price was already good to begin with, none of this Dupre highway robbery.

Truth is that I can find local pornstars who are hotter than this and who would fuck you on camera for a fraction of her price and even some street whores who willing to get the job done $5, but here’s some of the most inflated priced pussy around for free and you can’t complain when it don’t cost a thing.


Watch the Masturbation Clip Here

Posted in:Ashley Dupre|Sex Tape

2008

27

Jun

The Co-Star of the Mini Me Sex Tape of the Day

I was always about equal opportunity fucking. I figure that sex is a good thing and that everyone, despite their social inadequacies should be able to find someone to fuck. That was until I heard about the Mini Me sex tape. Truth is that I was trying to ignore this shit like it was a bad nightmare that it is and decided that somethings are better left ignored, but when I saw pictures of the slut in the video and listened to her radio show I had no choice but to post about it because this girl is an opportunist Jew trying to make it in Hollywood and this is her strategy and I feel for the poor little midget guy that got sucked into this because he just wanted to get laid and the only way he could get it was by promising her the exposure she wants.

I can assume that the first and only celebrity who spoke to her and was willing to fuck her, because lets face it, up until this point the only sex dude’s been getting is with hookers, was a midget/dwarf/monster who is hardly a celebrity and she decided that this will be her big break and by big I mean desperate attempt to have a break that will make her stick out from the other girls with the same dreams as her.

What she doesn’t realize is that this isn’t going to make her career, it is going to ruin any chance of having a career, because having a sex tape when you are a rich socialite with some other rich cokehead is one thing, while having sex with a mutant is in a whole other thing, a thing that disgust pretty much everybody in the fucking world, all while bringing hope to midgets/dwarves/mutants everywhere.

Either way, this is a sex tape that you will probably jerk off to because you always had a thing for the whole idea of having a miniature version of yourself to make your masturbating a lot more interesting and less lonely than it already is, but I am sure this is going to be a huge hit to your ego when you realize that Mini Me is more hung than you.

Her name is Ranae Something Jewish and here are her pics and radio interview, one that tells a girl’s tale of poverty, desperation and dreams of grandeur leading her into a very dark place with a very scary creature who promised to make those dreams a reality…. I was going to call this post What Won’t a Jew do for Money, but didn’t.


Listen to the Interview With this Bitch
GO

Posted in:Mini Me|Sex Tape|Star

2008

22

May

Day One of the R. Kelly Sex Tape Trial of the Day

I don’t know what is hotter, watching the R. Kelly sex tape or listening to some newscaster describe the sex tape on local television. There’s just something magical about hearing some woman on TV say “the girl is naked, and the man instructs her to dance, he tells her to urinate on the floor and then they engage in dirty talk with her calling him daddy and there are a number of sex acts where she is blank faced and passive”. It’s like she’s describing everytime I have ever slept with a woman, except instead of making them dance and piss on the floor, I apologize in advance and instead of being passive an blank-faced they are asleep and snoring because ladies…I am that good. Sex with me is so bad that the only way a girl can forget it’s happening is to try to sleep it off like a bad cold.

Posted in:R. Kelly|Sex Tape

2008

29

Apr

Jimi Hendrix 1968 Sex Tape of the Day

Jimi Hendrix liked filming himself fuck and I guess the girl who was in the film fucking him decided it was time to make some money,so she sold the shit to Vivid who are releasing it. I don’t know much more about the sex tape, but it’s probably one of the most obscure to hit and I guess dude won’t be too upset about it, considering he’s dead. I do know that he’s got 2 chicks on his dick because it’s the rockstar way and that made me realize that the sluts dyking out today isn’t anything new. I guess that’s the kinds of lessons we learn when our only form of education is through pornography.

Regardless of not being a fan of Hendrix, because I don’t play guitar and don’t think of him as some revolutionary, I am a fan of the bush, real tits and grainy black dudes fucking in the 60s so I will definitely download this shit illegally and watch it, even if it’s a piece of shit and doen’t impress me.

Speaking of not impressing people, I went to pick up my piece of shit computer that had the hard drive explode and asked them for my old hard drive in hopes of restoring the data. When they didn’t have it, I pretended to be pissed off and said “I have gigs of nude pictures of myself that I just don’t think I’ll ever be able to recreate”. The girl working the cash laughed awkwardly like the time I told the gas attendant who thought I was a girl because of my ratty long greasy balding hair that it happens all the time because of my big ol’ vagina. I guess people just don’t find me funny.

Either way, if more of this shit hits, I’ll be posting it, so ya’ll come back now.

Posted in:1968|Jimi Hendrix|Sex Tape

2008

24

Apr

Karla Edecan NSFW Mexican Sex Tape of the Day

Her name is Karla Edecan, she’s a Mexican Cheerleader and she has a sex tape. I am not like my black friend who always looked the other direction when a black girl would get up on stage to strip. He thought that shit was going against all his people had gone through and that disgusted him. I feel like seeing a hot Mexican chick getting fucked brings me back to my roots and doesn’t go against much and feel like every single girl should be documenting their sex so that I can get a glimpse into it as that is the closest I will ever get to fuckin’ them….

Either way, she lost her deal promoting the Mexican phone company which from what I heard is just two messenger donkeys, but it’s still a big deal for her I guess….and I am surprised considering everyone has a fuckin’ sex tape these days. We shouldn’t be slapping these girls hands to punish them, we should be inserting dildos in their asses and filming the shit because that is the next level of entertainment…at least according to me.

Posted in:Karla Edecan|Mexican|Sex Tape

2008

17

Apr

Colin Farrel’s Sex Tape Partner Nicole Narain Has a Nipple Slip of the Day

Her name is Nicole Narain and she’s some chick from Playboy who was the co-star in the Colin Farrel sex tape. I remember posting that video a long fuckin’ time ago and Colin Farrel ran after all of us for posting it with lawyers and shit because he’s a huge fuckin’ baby. The reality is that he made gay dudes everywhere happy because they got to see his dick and that was a lot more interesting to them than just always wondering what kinda heat he was packing and put an end to debates in gay clubs everywhere as to whether he was stacked or not. If anything, he did the gay community a favor and gave them something better to worry about like how they should use condoms when they have sex with strangers because it can prevent HIV. Before the sex tape hit, I am pretty sure Colin Farrel’s penis or the mystery of his penis caused so much confusion after getting hot and bothered watching one of his movies on a gay date with the guy they met in a bar that people died because of it.

Either way, I am on a black girl kick right now and think she’s hot enough, I guess Playboy and Farrel already confirmed that for me, in reality the fact she has a vagina confirmed that for me, so here she is showing her nipple.

Posted in:Nicole Narain|Nipple Slip|Playboy|Sex Tape

2008

02

Apr

Dita Von Teese Lesbian Sex Tape of the Day

Here’s a video that’s surfaced, but is probably from a while ago, of Dita Von Teese dyking out on video with a strap on. I hate Dita Von Teese, she does tame bullshit burlesque shit and looks like a vampire from the 1800s and that makes me feel uncomfortable because all I keep thinking is that bitch doesn’t wash, has the plague and shit’s in a chamber pot in her brothel boudoir or some shit.

I don’t know if this is news because I feel like I’ve seen her pussy before but blocked it out of my mind because I knew she was fucking Marilyn Manson. I remember she did Playboy and was internet famous before her celebrity really hit and now you can watch her rockin a strap on because lesbians may not be cool enough to fuck you, but when they let you watch them go at it, they are are better than all the other girls who don’t fuck you and unfortunately a hell of a lot better lookin than the lesbians I know who want to rip my dick off in some kind of victorious win for women everywhere, but that’s not really saying much because those lesbians are taking male hormones and have hair on their chests and clits the size of a really small penis. True story.

Here’s the Article
GO

Posted in:Dita Von Teese|Lesbian|Porn|Sex Tape|Video

2008

02

Apr

Max Mosley’s Nazi Sex Tape with 5 Hookers of the Day

I know this hit the internet yesterday but figured I’d post it because I feel the same way as Mosley in his fetish sex video with 5 hookers reenacting the Nazi regime because he’s obviously got some serious fuckin sexual issues and even if you thought Schindlers List was porn because there was a naked emaciated women in it, you don’t live that shit out with hookers like some kind of weirdo.

My site’s been hacked for the fourth time this month and I haven’t been able to access it all morning, at by morning I mean since noon because I am a slob and sleep in, but I’ve come to a point where everything that can go wrong with the site has gone wrong so I am not very phased by being hacked, it’s become expected and part of doing the site.

Reality is that I appreciated the post because I didn’t have anything lined up for the morning and it made for some good content. I am happy he didn’t delete any of my archives because if he did, I probably would have given up the site. I am weak like that and feel more like a donkey lugging it’s last load up a mountain before having a heart attack than a donkey lugging it’s first load up the mountain. I realize that analogy sucked but you get what I am saying, what I hope you don’t get is off to this video because it’s about as hot as the rash on your dick from all the masturbating you’ve done this week.

Either way, I feel like a whore involuntarily letting men inside my most sacred place, but not minding it so much when they are there because it makes me feel wanted and loved. I am glad the H4X0R didn’t delete anything and was just showing me that he could delete shit, that was pretty good of him because I would have totally redirected the site to a gay porn site or something funnier than that because I know gay porn is kinda your thing.

Posted in:Max Mosley|Scandal|Sex Tape

2008

20

Mar

Lindsay Lohan’s Sex Tape of the Day

There was a rumor that Lohan had a sex tape with Callum Best, one of her many boyfriends and people are saying that this is a cell phone pic of her suckin’ dick. I am surprised Lohan actually sucks dick, I took her for the kind of girl who just lies there and lets you do things to her because she’s either too drunk, too lazy and too into herself to care about making you feel good, kinda like thinking she’s doing you a favor for letting you into her sacred place that so many others have ventured into, making it about as sacred as a seat on a city bus, but since it’s expensive and she’s famous, it’s far more luxurious and that’s something you should consider yourself lucky for getting a piece of….

I can’t make out whether the shit is her or not and all these sex scandals bore me because I’m not the one starring in the videos with these famous bitches, but if I was you would all love the way I awkwardly grab women’s tits before giggling and hiding under the sheets because I am shy.

Either way, here are her hard nipples on their way to a private jet….obviously a lesbian private jet…that’s why she’s got the boots on….

Here she is smoking….

Posted in:Blowjob|Lindsay Lohan|Sex Tape