SFW Archives - Page 54 of 1171 Archive - DrunkenStepFather.com

2019

13

Dec

Lindsey Pelas Titty Workout of the Day

Lindsey Pelas is the Louisiana dream that really isn’t a dream at all, but that does have big fucking tits, that she’s been an ambassador for, or a host body for, over the last long time thanks to instagram….

I don’t know her backstory, but I know she used her tits to get to LA, and I know that being in LA got her tits on the MTV redo of the Hills, where she got to hang out with Mischa Barton….because we as a people will always like America blonde chicks with monster tits…

THis is her working out, not news to anyone really, but worth watching cuz of the tits…obviously.

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Posted in:Lindsey Pelas|SFW

2019

12

Dec

Katy Perry Christmas Tits of the Day

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Nothing says “let’s cancel Christmas” despite loving Christmas than seeing an aging Katy Perry and her sloppy tits basically exploit Christmas for her own personal gain because she knows people fucking love Christmas and if she was to do the LeAnn Rimes and only release Christmas Music for the rest of her life, she would guarantee serious fucking income without having to put too much effort in, besides doing a tour between November 15 – Dec 15th in select cities….it is the logical progression for a old pitch trying to stay relevant in music, even though she’s richer than god and doesn’t really need to stay relevant, it’s just that her ego won’t allow her to chill, cuz this is what she always wanted and with some strategic selling her soul to the devil she became a HUGE fucking success…a star beyond anyone’s wildest imagination because from the day we saw her…we saw a bloated awkward barely talented chick…with really dumb music and dumb creative direction…who wasn’t hot at all but had some tits….which isn’t normally enough to get to where Katy Perry got and I have a hard time believing her “visionary” brain got her there…it was really just a lottery win.

Well, as it turns out, she still has the sloppy tits to go with the sloppy rest of her…so there’s that.

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Posted in:Katy Perry|SFW

2019

12

Dec

Dakota Fanning Sports Bra of the Day

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Dakota Fanning in fitness active wear doesn’t make Dakota Fanning any more interesting or exciting.

I know that fitness active wear makes the moms at the mall, the grocery store, picking up the kids at school, far more exciting than their traditional mom outfits. You know because you can basically see the cunts that ruined their lives in all their vaginal glory…but it’s still not all that exciting, it’s just a better version of themselves as they are being strapped in by all the fabrics…where this shit, a celebrity in activewear, doesn’t have any of that appeal, at least not on the internet where I expect to see tits and pussy holes…

Despite being creepy as fuck….the child star who acted 45 years old at 10 years old thanks to her parents brainwashing her…and despite being a big celebrity who has been in the game forever…this outfit sucks….maybe less acting like a 45 year old mom at the grocery store and more like an “influencer’ selling premium snap chat dildo shows…there’s gotta be a happy place somewhere down the middle….

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

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Posted in:Dakota Fanning|SFW

2019

12

Dec

Anastasia Ashley Bikini Booty of the Day

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Anastasia Ashley has come out of hiding and is gracing the beaches of Miami for the papaprazzi with her surf booty out like old times….

A booty in a bikini never gets old…I mean…sure it gets “OLD” in theory….but when you live that active, fit lifestyle, it gets old far slower, far better than the average 30 year old bitch I see at the grocery store buying as many pints of ice cream, frozen pizzas, sugar filled snack foods to curl up on the couch and eat before another day of selling their soul to the thankless job they have in order to pay the rent…cuz those 30 year olds are depressing as shit…and fat as shit….and not bikini ready….not even a year out….cuz they’ve given the fuck up…

While this one’s long day at the office is hanging out on the fucking beach and eating ACAI bowls and smoothies….half naked….doing what most people can’t even afford to do once a year cuz of that long lonely life at the office doing menial fucking bullshit tasks…making barely enough money to survive…they shoulda though about that when they were younger, you know get into surfing as a child to carry that into adulthood….so that instead of watching their favorite XMAS movie in their shitty apartment, they’d be doing this.

Here’s to people living better lives than us…cuz we suck.

Bella Hadid Slutty of the Day

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Here is some Bella Hadid photoshopped to look like less of a man and more of a Gigi Hadid, you know cuz the face injections and surgeries are part of the lie that Bella Hadid is, but the photoshop is that is what brings it all home….I mean that and the support of the idiots of the world…

So here she is pretending to be a model because the OUTSIDE world has made her think that she is a model because the outside world is fucking garbage, full of idiots trying to figure out their own existence and life, believing what they are told by the media because that is how they’ve always lived their life, and how their parents and grand parents lived their life before them.

ALlowing for snakes and weasels and rats like this to sneak through the cracks thanks to being rich and confusing everyone around to think “Ok, I guess we’ll use her”….and the rest of her audience being like – “She’s an it girl, I guess we’ll follow her”….amplifying the lie….

People are inherently bad, inherently disgusting, and by throwing money at her…they’ve just perpetuated the nonsense that is Bella Hadid the fuckign ugly troll bitch who is zero fucking interesting, but at least she’s got a fake tit or two..

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Posted in:Bella Hadid|SFW

2019

12

Dec

Christina Aguilera Hairline Shaming of the Day

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Christina Aguilera got them fat girl monster tits that are likely very fake because I remember when the 90 pound version of her all of a sudden had tits…

Now, at 40, she’s looking like a Kardashian with all the face injections, which I guess is better than looking 40….you know go for that SEX doll look…and commit to it…in layers and layers of make-up…she’s fucking 40….and make people focus on the tits instead of the face so they buy into the fantasy, their own fantasy of her, keeping the dream a live and not allowing themselves to see that she’s a fucking 40 year old…

But unfortunately for her, all the hair and make-up, we can see her male-pattern baldness happening as it happens to some women when they get older, go through menopause, have their hormones all out of wack, and more importantly…have been aggressively bleaching their brown hair for 30 fucking years instead of embracing her natural old fucking self…

She looks plastic and it’s wonderful…

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Posted in:Christina Aguilera|SFW

2019

12

Dec

Charlize Theron Bullshit Clickbait of the Day

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I know I am typically on the cusp of celebrity nudity, even though I don’t post any of those deep fake celebrity nudity videos, and I don’t really post any of the leaked nudes because the celebrities threaten to sue over those, and it isn’t really worth going up against them as they are rich and powerful and I will always lose because I call them whores, in some cases hundreds, even thousands of times…..per celebrity…

But Charlize Theron, who I guess is on social media, I don’t follow that old shit, and don’t care about celebs and their deep pockets trying to reclaim their relevance by manipulating their numbers on social media, forcing out the “influencers” and taking their marketing money…..posted an edited video, which I assume is a reference to her original video, where she flashed her vagina like she did in Playboy in the 90s when she was just trying to pay rent, before becoming a celebrity, from showing her vagina to producers, like the whore that she is, like the whore all these girls, no matter how they portray Weinstein as the devil, all these people are the fucking devil…Charlize even killed her own dad.

Anyway, if you have the unedited cunt / or dick/ I don’t know what she’s packing these genderless days….send it in, I want to see it.

Posted in:Charlize Theron|SFW

2019

12

Dec

Sarah Hyland in the Bath of the Day

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Sarah Hyland is scary as fuck….like a little GREMLIN getting wet…lets hope she doesn’t multiply, even though she’s probably trying to multiply so that she can harvest all their organs to keep her weird self alive…

The Network Television star, who is likely rich as shit from being on Network Television, is still so fucking weird looking, her genetic or immune disorder that she’s never openly come out with….because she doesn’t want you to know she’s dying, but instead wants you to think she’s hot, which is weird, since she’s not…but that won’t stop her…when you know you’re going to die, you stop giving a fuck and put out all that content you’d otherwise never put out there, to maximize and relish in the praise the weirdo perv fans leave int eh comments…cuz you know despite being fucking creepy and weird looking…she’s got pervert fans that want to fuck her cuz she’s their fucking god, their rock of gibraltor, their rosetta stone, their holy grail, their arc of the covenant, their CLIMBING OF MOUNT EVEREST…I don’t know the expression, but she’s their end all be all of pussy…and you may be that pervert fan…so enjoy her bath time creepiness cuz she looks 12 or 97….I can’t tell….

Here she is working out..

Posted in:Sarah Hyland|SFW

2019

12

Dec

Kate Bosworth in a Bathing Suit of the Day

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Kate Bosworth may be old, she may not have accomplished all that much in her career, but she’s still famous enough, still a celebrity, and most importantly…still skinny, which is all we care about….

I guess she’s trying to MOCK instagram by doing dramatic bathing suit poses, with the whole comedic underdone by cross referencing the dramatic post with a little “Reality” pose doing a little “Instagram VS Reality” meme because she’s a cheeky little bitch…who realizes that in both cases, the serious and the barely humoristic, she’s still in a fucking bikini, making an excuse to be in a bikini, because bikinis get hits, we want to see these women half naked, and it’s all it takes to build up that social media presence that could possibly build up her career…cuz everything is on “the gram” now…and all these bootleg bitches are making it work…bring some celebrity to the mix…and elimiate all that trash…

I see what’s going on here, the mainstream is trying to reclaim what is theirs..and as long as a bathing suit I wrongfully identified as a bikini cuz I call all suits bikinis are riding up her skinny and tight bodied cunt…I’m down.

Posted in:Kate Bosworth|SFW

2019

12

Dec

Ireland Baldwin Big Cleavage for her Big Face of the Day

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Ireland Baldwin may have that disease the Elephant Man had….you know gigantism or partial gigantism of body parts, which in her case are her forehead, or maybe her full head, I don’t know, whatever it is…it is big….

But luckily, along with her gigantism 7 foot tall 300 pound frame, she’s also got some gigantism in her bra….cuz big titties make monster women more worthy and she obviously knows it…the other thing that makes women more worthy is when their parents are famous as shit, because typically people will bring them opportunities without much effort, but for some reason…no opportunities seem to come to Ireland…ever.

Posted in:Ireland Baldwin|SFW

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