SFW Archives - Page 855 of 1169 Archive - DrunkenStepFather.com

2016

08

Jul

Marcela Valladolid Food Network Chef Tits in a Bikini of the Day

I don’t jerk off to enough women celebrity chefs…

I feel like seeing a woman in her natural habitat – the kitchen – would have the same affect as when I see girls at the laundromat doing laundry like they are supposed to..

You know a direct link to my useless cock – sending me signals to get hard because she’s a provider – and I should make babies…

But alas, I don’t…but I’ll try….with Marcela Valladolid in her bikini top…it’s a new fetish – but she’s no Marth Stewart which means she’s nothing…but her belly’s looks fun…to make her feel insecure about in attempts to seduce her to feed me all the rich and good food she can easily make me….

Dreams could come true…but I doubt it…

Posted in:Marcela Valladolid|SFW

2016

07

Jul

Mischa Barton Bikini for Alton Sterling of the Day

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Social Justice Warrior Mischa Barton – who everyone forgot after the OC ended – leaving her with all the time and money in the world to do what made her happy – self medicating – to the point of rehab stints, a DEATH WATCH where we were convinced she was going to die – and then the fat years….all out of the public eye until Dancing with the Stars happened, and she got fit..maybe even sober…allowing her to pose in a bikini on a boat to express gun control, the future president and all things political about the state of America…because from a yacht…it’s pretty clear what changes need to be made for America to be less annoying for the rich…

With all things political…and about guns, AMerica is mad at Mischa for this – to the point she deleted it but the internet remembers all things…..ironically not Mischa Barton…until she does things like this…

I guess supporting ALton Sterling, calling the cops pigs in a bikini is cute…sexual…sexy but I just miss her cellulite ridden legs…what’s with this muscle tone…sad…

Posted in:Mischa Barton|SFW

2016

07

Jul

Hot Runner Faceplants of the Day

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Good times in the most boring, least porny, but those shorts are pretty great – so maybe it is a slutty sport…all those track and field meets – in the locker room, feet young and hormonal people – who can run fast if they get caught…

I still think Summer Olympics suck, and not just because ZIKA virus and high crime rate..but because summer sports..

But when a bitch trying to qualify for the biggest amateur sporting event int he world and she slams on her face with her hot body – I appreciate it….

Posted in:SFW|Sports

2016

07

Jul

Margot Robbie Slutty for Vanity Fair of the Day

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Big girl Margot Robbie is on the aggressive self promotion kick because the stars aligned in some kind of miracle and she’s now the most important person in Hollywood – starring in all the big movies and on the cover of magazines like she’s not some Australian brat pulling some kind of elaborate scam….

People love her and I guess she’s alright…they also get mad when I call her big but I guess they like believing lies…

TO SEE HER – Margot Robbie at some Premiere..FOR A MOVIE SHE SCAMMER HER WAY ON CLICK HERE

Posted in:Margot Robbie|SFW

2016

07

Jul

Em Rat Cow Naked Again for Attention of the Day

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Emily Ratajkowski is grinding her vagina against horses because she’s so fancy, high budget, regal and doing weird theatrical nude photoshoots for magazines to ensure she still maintains her position as go to nude model because going Hollywood has been pretty challenging for her and her tila tequila level of talent….

She gave us the tits and is still tits….a great body yes….and that’s about it…which I guess is enough….

Like the female Fabio on the cover of a romance novel…magic

Posted in:SFW

2016

07

Jul

Ariel Winter Shitting Out Cheetos of the Day

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It would be expected that all Ariel Winter shits out is Cheetos – you gotta feed your feelings of being an exploited by your parents thrown into the entertainment industry to be on a hit show – a great opportunity for the whole family – but more importantly to feed your stupid even after being reduced huge young titties!

Perverts everywhere rejoice!

Posted in:Ariel Winter|SFW

2016

07

Jul

Famewhore Bella Thorne is the New Lohan in a Bra of the Day

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Bella Thorne is the new Lohan, not broken or haggard yet – but still has red hair and exploitive parents still not quite at her peak and really could be just a splash in the pan we don’t remember – but there is still hope she gets one hit role to support her hit Instagram where she uses her tits to get hits in a subtle but obvious way – which will make the crash far more enjoyable….

But I don’t mind spending two seconds a day or less paying notice to her antics my life is dull and empty – might as well fill up on junk food like this….

To see the rest of the pics click here

Posted in:Bella Thorne|SFW

2016

07

Jul

Loving 30 Year Old Lohan in a Bikini of the Day

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I am still celebrating Lindsay Lohan’s birthday. The big 3-0…

She’s haggard -and amazing….but not overly fat and Her tits are awesome…so she’s doing just fine!

I just pathetic enough to be Trying to figure out her pussy mound / pussy definition is awesome – even a mystery because that’s the first thing I look at in any bathing suit situation….and I am not too sure what I am looking at but I feel like it may be heaven – a shit stained, scabby, heaven…..my queen..

To see the rest click here

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|SFW

2016

07

Jul

Ashley Benson in Miami of the Day

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Chubby Ashley Benson who is less chubby than she was but was an iconic figure in the youth culture scene because she’s on a hit show that targets them but also because her chubby body mimics theirs making her accessible and even more famous…

I know her from sex scenes in Springbreakers – a movie I like to think represented all that is wrong in the world with kids these days and their shitty rap music and bodies but I guess she’s done other things like this Snapchat from Miami zero erotic but people still care because our lives are pathetic….

Posted in:Ashley Benson|SFW

2016

07

Jul

Paris Hilton’s Ass in a Dress of the Day

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Paris Hilton may be in her mid to late 30s but like any superficial Beverly Hills rich kid – she knows the value of looking good and staying skinny. It’s a superficial world and you are what you present yourself as which in Paris’ case is a sensationalized overrated dumb blonde with a sex tape who talks in baby talk to be cute who above all is not fat and willing to show you because it’s how she markets herself.

I am convinced she owns a percentage of Kim Kardashians empire because I’ve heard she’s a brilliant business person from a global hotel brand stock and not some bootleg sugar baby and lawyer daughter that is Kim K, and even if she’s not getting her 10-20 percent off the top, she’s still able to leverage that international brand name that is her last name for Arab men who pay her to go to their parties – it is status and probably a biohazard….at least in the pussy range…

She still looks good to me….

To see the rest of the pics click here

Posted in:Paris Hilton|SFW

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