SFW Archives - Page 857 of 1169 Archive - DrunkenStepFather.com

2016

06

Jul

Rita Ora in a Bikini for Snapchat of the Day

My favorite thing about Rita Ora – besides her juicy Titas is that she’s fucked everyone including but not limited to Calvin Harris – who you may remember as the guy who was having unprotected sex with Taylor Swift in what I like to call “this is why all celebs and the hookers who hang out with celebs because I will never admit that Rita Ora, a Rihanna impersonator is a celeb. The only reason I know she exists is because I run a Titty blog” kind of thing….

And here are her titties and a little pussy in a bikini definition that you’d think would be so contaminated enough to burn holes in her bikini bottoms or at least be more meaty and battered but I guess that’s the nice thing about bikini fabric technology – that shit can give a fat pig a waistline and it can give beat up pussy the illusion of being tight as fuck…

I guess what I’m saying is that Rita riga Ora does things like a girl should, by getting under a man for relevance that is barely relevance but she can say she got to Taylor Swifts ex dick first. Goals. Levels. Current mood. Fire.

Posted in:SFW

2016

06

Jul

Caitlin Jenner’s Bathing Suit Erotica for America of the Day

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I don’t keep on top of Caitlin Jenner news. So this bathing suit pic of Caitlin Jenner where you can see her balls may be old, but I figure with it being the wake of the Fourth of July and American freedom – we should celebrate a fame whore narcissist with a hormonal imbalance thanks to steroid use – just going out in a bathing suit for a swim – as tons of cameras look on because he’s jealous of all the attention his wife and stepdaughters get so he decides to full clown the world…

Or maybe…the freedom to jerk off to a chick with a dick in her 60s is what America is all about…or maybe the ability to piss standing up in a girls bathromm while wearing pantyhose is what America is all about…

Either way, fourth of july was 2 days ago – this isn’t about America..it’s about BRUCE / CAITLIN cock.

Posted in:Caitlin Jenner|SFW

2016

06

Jul

Carla Gugino for Some Magazine of the Day

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I say that I don’t know who any of these people are on the regular – because for the most part – I don’t know who any of these people are – but sometimes I am just trolling – by pretending I don’t know who a fame whore bitch is even if I know who that fame whore bitch is – but I don’t actually know the fame whore bitch – so I techncially don’t know who she is – or what she is – I just know her name…which isn’t enough to really determine the motivation for why she’s half naked…not that I complain about half naked – if anything -I live for it…

But Carla Gugino…I genuinely don’t remember, she seems old and trying to make a comeback in some obscure magazine, which I guess is a start…

I usually prefer the sex tape approach though….not black and white fake artsy shit…

Either way, for the Carla Gugino fans…here’s Carla Gugino…

Posted in:Carla Gugino|SFW

2016

05

Jul

Lindsay Lohan’s 30th Birthday of the Day

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Lohan may have turned 30 this past weekend, but her tits are only about 13 or 14 and her mangled jacked up face is only about 5 and her level of relevancy being 0 is about 4-5 also…I guess the fading into obscurity being unhirable and all that happened around the same time she started jacking up her face…

But she’s still Lohan, she’s still the redheaded object of desire, the queen of my universe when I remember she exists and she’s still lookin good enough for me, like a crazy rich wife on AMBIEN to deal with her miserable life shes got everything in…and I believe with her boyfriend’s billions, she will be able to finance a movie of her own and win that Oscar to just prove what both her and I already know…and that is that she’s fucking magic…being broken thanks to fucked up parents just gets in the way of that.

I am a forever fan, but no really that committed fan, because I don’t care about this nonsense or people I don’t know, but I like her tits and that is important…oh and I hugged her once and felt her broken soul against my chest, making me want to take her under my wing as I do with most crackwhores and give them a bowl of soup, but at the time, she was still rich and didn’t need billionaire boyfriends to sugar baby…she was her own independent puppet to her family, the media and the industry..

HAPPY BIRTHDAY LILO WE ALL THOUGHT YOU WOULD DIE AT 22 AND IN A LOT OF WAYS YOU DID….

Here are some of the best pics of her ever….in her CUSTOM LILO bikini….to bring back the good days….

At Least She’s Happy

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|LOLZ|SFW

2016

05

Jul

Kate Moss is Great MOSS of the Day

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Kate Moss is so old her leg skin is growing moss …or maybe that’s just cellulite from a woman on a cocaine and cigarette diet for 25 years of modeling …who has fucked so many people – some of which were needle sharing rockstars…and she just fucking owns it…sitting on her pile of money, being an iconic name, not giving a fuck because why would see…as her skin melts off her legs…it’s hard to be self conscious as a 50 year old always celebrated for being a babe – when you are the kind of babe who knows that is the dumbest thing to be celebrated for – while taking all the money thrown her way…unlike the American models who made careers off their looks still trying – you know the trashy fame whore kinds…who would never spread their cellulite ridden legs for the paparazzi…but Kate Moss just owns it – and I’d love to bury my face in her crotch to smell the worldly smells it has accumulated…

She’s magic…I like that she’s reading Vogue – you know staying on top of the industry – but I prefer the spread eagle slop…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Kate Moss|SFW

2016

05

Jul

Taylor Swift’s Boyfriend is Bitch Made of the Day

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You can’t see it – but the guy Tom Hiddleston or whatever his name is – who Taylor Swift cheated on Calvin Harris with – is wearing an I HEART T.S. shirt in their staged paparazzi bikini pics – because I guess he’s trying to be cute or funny or do anything in his power to not fuck this up because she’s got all the money and fame he wants – and this is a good way to leverage it….so make her feel confident in him, like a pussy whipped bitch, and make his narcisstic dreams come true – his ego wants that for him…

If you’ve met male actors you’ll know they are all gay, like Disney stars, too pretty and self conscious to be hetero…sure they bang women, they bang alot of women, but after banging out all the women, the key is to find one to mooch off of since most don’t really make that much money…

This is just bad and I Heart TS shirt…what a little faggot…

Maybe you’re more into her and GIGI HADID sharing or wearing matching bathing suits – i prefer thinking of their rank – used – slutty pussies rubbing up against the same fabric…but that’s just me..

Or maybe you like Hailey Baldwin who wasn’t invited to the Swift party in a one piece…

TO SEE ALL THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:SFW|Taylor Swift

2016

05

Jul

Selena Gomez Butt Shot of the DAy

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Selena Gomez is really into sexualizing herself. She has been since she put together a movie called Springbreakers that was sent to her and her mom when her mom was her manager – where she waned to play the more racy character – but instead opted for the virgin – in order to maintain her image – you see because all these girls are whores – they just don’t want to be overly public whores – that’s the first lesson taught at the Disney school of child star…

But as the art scene, the music scene, the movie scene get more and more like the porn scene as a generation of people who were exposed to porn realize what I’ve always been saying and that is that sex is great, porn is not, but sex is great and looking at vagina, ass and tits is fun…

The funny thing about doing this site for 15 years is that I’ve seen the whole world do a total fucking shift into accepting penetrative sex as part of who we are and what we do – in a society that used to prefer letting kids see people shot and killed to seeing a set of tits…which is so fucking twisted…

So I guess with all the social media whore pressure, comes a pressure to stay relevant, aand what better way than to sexualize yourself as you cash the fuck in, some male attention is a nice year end bonus or some shit…

It’s not that good…

Posted in:Selena Gomez|SFW

2016

05

Jul

Charlotte McKinney Big Tits of the Day

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Charlotte McKinney acting all modest, trying to cover up like some kind of mormon or religious weirdo on a pilgrimage when the only real pilgrimage she’s on is trying to use them sloppy tits to get as famous as possible is kind of funny…

I mean maybe she’s having an off day – where she just doesn’t want to show off all the 5 layer dip and wings her white trash from Florida fucking love – the same food that made her the sloppy tits that made her… or maybe this is part of a very basic calculated strategy to be relevant…either way…we get to see some of her huge, absurd, sloppy tit and that’s always worth the 3 seconds or less we care to spend on this freak…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Charlotte McKinney|SFW

2016

05

Jul

Mel B PDA on a Boat of the Day

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Mel B of spice girls fame was always my favorite spice girl – because I have always been into black girls – but more importantly she had the hottest body, she was fit, busty had shape where as Baby Spice was chubby, that’s why they called her baby, it was a way to package the fat, sporty spice was a dyke, Posh spice was hot but uninspiring, and Ginger Spice was some washed up stripper who shoulda remained a stripper – being shameless and trashy…while this one…had hard nipples..

Well apparently Black don’t crack that bad, because her body IS still better than Beyonce which isn’t saying much…but it is saying that she’s got a lot of good going on and this bitch has at least 2 kids with different dudes – and that was before finding this K-Fed to show the world how in love he is with her booty and money..living the life of luxury…

At least she’s not CHRISTINA MILIAN IN A BATHING SUIT FAME WHORING

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Mel B|SFW

2016

05

Jul

Alessandra Ambrosio Beach Body of the Day

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Alessandra Ambrosio best work in recent years has been her breast implants after her kids….

I still think she’s old, played out, boring…but at least she’s not that tranny Gisele…She’s instead, like Lima, one of the Brazilians who looks like she was born with a vagina, and I guess that’s a good thing….if you’re not into tranny even though it seems eveyrone is into tranny..

I figure Brazil needs all the support it can get in these hard times of dangerous gangs and ZIKA virus for the Olympics…but I don’t think Ambrosio, a Brazilian defector who made her money in AMerica is the answer…if anything I think she’s had far too much press over the years, and this is just the tail end where younger and hotter versions of her doing the same work as her – which isn’t even inspiring or good work – it’s just catalog underwear work – meaning she ultimately doesn’t matter – but she won’t accept that and just fall out and age gracefully, VS is still under contract with her so cash the fuck in as long as you can – even if it is the last hurrah…

I guess what I am saying is that I am a firm believer that models die at 27….

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Look She’s on the cover of Cosmo UK which is only 1 British Pound – or 10 cents AMERICAN duE to their BREXIT because she matters…and the magazine is JUST THAT GOOD…

Posted in:Alessandra Ambrosio|SFW

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