Unsorted Archives - Page 64 of 511 Archive - DrunkenStepFather.com

2007

01

Oct

I am – Jordan's Drunken Upskirt of the Day

The thing I like about Jordan is that she knows her role. She’s a party slut and she’s got no problem going out and getting drunk and living up that shit. There’s nothing that I hate more than party sluts who pretend they aren’t party sluts and act all fucking conservative and shit until they get a drink in them and then the tits or panties come out. You know the party slut that can only unleash the inner party slut with a few drinks in her. You know the kind of girl that is constantly in the corner hooking up with dudes, having multiple one night stands then going home after being abused to feel shitty about herself and spends the week coping with her whore behavior until the next week roles around and she gets another drink in her. I guess both are a good time, but I don’t really like surprises so Jordan living this shit day to day accepting what she is inspires me.

The other thing I like about Jordan is that she’s a mom and I have a thing for irresponsible parents. Bitch just had a kid and is already out hitting the clubs showing off that she lost her pregnancy weight and still has retardedly big tits and a vagina that I am sure doesn’t smell like roses. I am thinking she’s seen more cock than TROJAN or this 75 year old hooker that’s still working around the corner from me after a 55 year career because it’s all she knows.

The only thing I hate about girls with all that penis experience is that they know I’m packing a hybrid penis that’s usually more vaginal, but only on cold days, where as less experienced girls never really know how shitty it actually is. I always used to try to tell girls to let me stick it in them cuz they won’t feel anything and that I’m like a tampon but that never really worked out for me.

Either way, here’s Jordan’s upskirt.

Related Posts:

Jordan’s Chinese New Year See Through Outfit
Jordan is a Topless Lesbian on the Beach
Jordan’s Classy Cleavage Exposing Dress
Jordan’s Pregnant Bikini Pictures

2007

01

Oct

I am – Jordan’s Drunken Upskirt of the Day

3 Comments »

The thing I like about Jordan is that she knows her role. She’s a party slut and she’s got no problem going out and getting drunk and living up that shit. There’s nothing that I hate more than party sluts who pretend they aren’t party sluts and act all fucking conservative and shit until they get a drink in them and then the tits or panties come out. You know the party slut that can only unleash the inner party slut with a few drinks in her. You know the kind of girl that is constantly in the corner hooking up with dudes, having multiple one night stands then going home after being abused to feel shitty about herself and spends the week coping with her whore behavior until the next week roles around and she gets another drink in her. I guess both are a good time, but I don’t really like surprises so Jordan living this shit day to day accepting what she is inspires me.

The other thing I like about Jordan is that she’s a mom and I have a thing for irresponsible parents. Bitch just had a kid and is already out hitting the clubs showing off that she lost her pregnancy weight and still has retardedly big tits and a vagina that I am sure doesn’t smell like roses. I am thinking she’s seen more cock than TROJAN or this 75 year old hooker that’s still working around the corner from me after a 55 year career because it’s all she knows.

The only thing I hate about girls with all that penis experience is that they know I’m packing a hybrid penis that’s usually more vaginal, but only on cold days, where as less experienced girls never really know how shitty it actually is. I always used to try to tell girls to let me stick it in them cuz they won’t feel anything and that I’m like a tampon but that never really worked out for me.

Either way, here’s Jordan’s upskirt.

Related Posts:

Jordan’s Chinese New Year See Through Outfit
Jordan is a Topless Lesbian on the Beach
Jordan’s Classy Cleavage Exposing Dress
Jordan’s Pregnant Bikini Pictures

2007

01

Oct

I am – Lohan Touching Her Toes of the Day

1 Comment »

I decided to sit in a coffee shop because I wanted out of the house and didn’t have anywhere else to go. I saw a bitch breast feeding, which seems to happen every fucking time I go into the place and today I was feeling a little obnoxious so I looked at her and looked at the baby and told her to save some for me because I was feeling kinda hungry. The mom wasn’t too impressed and told me to fuck myself or something. I guess she didn’t realize that I was being serious.

I used to get the same reaction back in the day when I thought asking a girl to touch her toes was the funniest question, because they’d answer it seriously, then realize how fucking creepy and would tell me to fuck myself. I used to ask girls in all kinds of situations to touch their toes, whether it was outside the gym, where I used to hang out to see mom’s come in in their lycra, or at the mall where I’d sit to see the teen girls shopping, or the grocery store when women were bending over to get cans of soup. I’m creepy like that.

Here are some pictures of Lohan doing what I used to love seeing girls do, I don’t think she has any idea that this toe touching shit is a fetish of mine, but I’ll just pretend she does, like you pretend the girls you see in porn are your girlfriends who let you lick their assholes every time you jerk off.

Related Posts:

Lohan’s Rehab Pedicure Pictures
Lohan’s Ass in Rehab Pictures
Lohan’s Whore Stance in Rehab
Throwback Lohan Stalker Post

Posted in:Ass|Lindsay Lohan|Rehab|Toe Touching|Unsorted

2007

01

Oct

I am – Pamela Anderson's Creepy Cleavage of the Day

No Comments »

I went to a Breast Cancer event, not because I believe in Charity even though I’d like to single handedly save every breast in the world with my mouth, but Charity events are horse shit. They are a group of people who either didn’t give a fuck about anyone but themselves before the disease directly affected them or someone they love, or a group of self righteous assholes pretending to make a difference, while pulling a salary off the charity organization and only donating a fraction of the money they make to the cause because the rest of the money’s going into the elaborate events that seduce rich people to show up to because they want to feel less guilty about being rich cocksuckers who fuck people over everyday to feel like they are doing their part so that they can sleep soundly at night…..

So the real reason I went to breast cancer charity event was because I like watching the self exam demo. Shit’s like porno to me.

Speaking of porno here’s some pictures of Pam Anderson’s breasts busting out of her shirt, because those fuckers are huge and by huge I mean disgusting. They are so filled with rubber that could have been better used to save a nation from AIDS and unwanted pregnancy but at least they won’t ever get breast cancer, they are the titty equivalent of when a retired couple put aluminum siding on their house so they’ll never have to paint y again….if you know what I mean, which you probably don’t because I don’t even know what I am talking about. Just look at her tits pervert.

Related Posts:

Pam Anderson Licks Some Dude With Her Vagina Exposed
Pam Anderson’s Tits Hang With Rick Solomon
Pam Anderson’s Black Bikini Pictures
Pam Anderson’s White Bikini Pictures

Posted in:cleavage|Implants|Pamela Anderson|Tits|Unsorted

2007

01

Oct

I am – Pamela Anderson’s Creepy Cleavage of the Day

1 Comment »

I went to a Breast Cancer event, not because I believe in Charity even though I’d like to single handedly save every breast in the world with my mouth, but Charity events are horse shit. They are a group of people who either didn’t give a fuck about anyone but themselves before the disease directly affected them or someone they love, or a group of self righteous assholes pretending to make a difference, while pulling a salary off the charity organization and only donating a fraction of the money they make to the cause because the rest of the money’s going into the elaborate events that seduce rich people to show up to because they want to feel less guilty about being rich cocksuckers who fuck people over everyday to feel like they are doing their part so that they can sleep soundly at night…..

So the real reason I went to breast cancer charity event was because I like watching the self exam demo. Shit’s like porno to me.

Speaking of porno here’s some pictures of Pam Anderson’s breasts busting out of her shirt, because those fuckers are huge and by huge I mean disgusting. They are so filled with rubber that could have been better used to save a nation from AIDS and unwanted pregnancy but at least they won’t ever get breast cancer, they are the titty equivalent of when a retired couple put aluminum siding on their house so they’ll never have to paint y again….if you know what I mean, which you probably don’t because I don’t even know what I am talking about. Just look at her tits pervert.

Related Posts:

Pam Anderson Licks Some Dude With Her Vagina Exposed
Pam Anderson’s Tits Hang With Rick Solomon
Pam Anderson’s Black Bikini Pictures
Pam Anderson’s White Bikini Pictures

Posted in:cleavage|Implants|Pamela Anderson|Tits|Unsorted

2007

01

Oct

I am – Tori Spelling is a Pussycat Doll of the Day

No Comments »

I’ve taken shits hotter than Tori Spelling and I have some kind of liver failure shit that I never got checked out that fucks up my digestion, not that you care, but I figured I’d throw it out there so that you know that my bloody yellow stool is better put together than this bitch.

She hosted some Pussycat Doll show in Vegas and by looking at these pictures she looks like she’s better suited to host a tranny show in some seedy gay club that the tranny’s don’t even bother checking out because they’d rather sit at home and do their hair.

I was at a strip club and saw some bitch who looked a lot like Tori Spelling, only her tits were about 10 times the size, she was one of those fetish type of girls who was raped growing up and is taking reactive measures to deal with the pain of having her innocence taken. I’m talking tits so big bitch was a fucking cartoon character and when she took off my friends hat, and covered her tit with it, shit barely covered her insanely huge nipples. One of the many things better about this girl than Tori Spelling is that her pussy was pierced shut with some serious metal clasps and cages that made her look like she had a dick in her panties, but when it came off just brought home the fact that no dick was getting in that shit and no baby was coming out….Unfortunately for us, Tori obviously doesn’t have that proven by the fact that she just had a baby, and now some poor kids gotta grow up with a mom as embarrassing as this.

Related Posts:

Tori Spelling’s Big Nipple
Tori Spelling’s Diseased Tit Pictures
Tori Spelling Pregnant Pictures

2007

30

Sep

I am – Hometown Hotties Finalist Jody of the Day

3 Comments »

If you’re going to vote in the Maxim Hometown Hotties Contest, I demand you vote for Jody. The truth is I reached out to her and told her that I have the power to make her win, which means if she wins she’ll want to bang me, and having some hot chick who is the Hometown Hottie in Maxim want to bang me for hookin’ her up is pretty much livin’ the dream….because I like hot chicks wanting to repay me with their vaginas.

Now the reason I reached out to Jody is because her body blew me the fuck away. She is tight and looks like she’d be a solid girl, one who takes care of you like a mother and fucks you like a whore, and is pretty much has everything I want in a Hometown Hottie and a wife. She was born for this shit and started off working when she was younger selling lemonade in her bathing suit because she knew what her calling was, like the Hotel Manager who wouldn’t give me Jared Leto’s room number because he was born into a family of Hotel Managers and has been working towards hotel management since he was 5, whatever the fuck that means, all I know is that he wouldn’t take 1000 dollars to give me the info, not that I would have paid him because I don’t have 1000 dollars, but he didn’t know that.

Either way, the point of this post is to say that if Jody doesn’t win. I am going to quit this site and move to LA to park in a van outside her apartment until she forgives me for my lies, or calls the cops and gets me arrested. Don’t let us down and Make Jody the Hometown Hotties Contest Winner.

Related:

Check Out Jody’s Profile

Check Out The Maxim Hometown Hotties Contest

Previous Hometown Hottie stepREVIEWs:

ERIN
LETICIA
KENDA
JUDA
JAIME
NICKI
ROBERTA
GILLIAN
SHARAE

Posted in:Hometown Hotties Contest|Jody|Maxim|stepREVIEWS|Unsorted

2007

29

Sep

I am – Hometown Hottie Finalist Sharae of the Day

2 Comments »

Finally, a Hometown Hottie who I think deserves to be in the running, all my other reviews were kinda mean to the girls but that’s only because I didn’t think they had any business being in the competition and that they should pursue other careers, some in porn, others in working at the local Wal Mart of their Hometown but this girl Sharae has got it going on.

First off, she’s got a pretty unique face, and I am all about unique faces, I am tired of seeing the easily replaced clone party slut with fake tits, because if everyone looks the fucking same, like a cookie cutter slut, there’s no fun in bothering to learn there name, but there is fun in stuffin them like a turkey. Second, she’s got a good body, with nice big natural looking tits and to me, a hometown hottie has to have the package. She’s the girl you’re supposed to see walking around your hood and freak out over because she’s so ridiculous that you tell yourself she deserves to be in magazines. Thirdly, she wrote that she’s single, which even if it’s not true, allows all the magazine readers to think it is and that makes jerking off onto her glossy pictures easier to do, because they can fantasize that she’s actually into them….and when they cut out her picture and put it on their pillow to pretend they aren’t alone, they don’t have thoughts of her being out fucking other men.

I feel like Sharae’s got a good chance in making it, because to me she defines what Maxim is looking for, and if she doesn’t at least we’ve all seen her dressed all half naked and posing, and maybe if she doesn’t make it, she’ll at least get a gig doing something else that involves her hosting parties in my hometown so that I can douse her in champagne and lick it off her, and by champagne I mean moonshine that I sneak in, and by licking it off, I mean getting carried away in handcuffs….

Related:

Check Out Sharae’s Profile

Check Out The Maxim Hometown Hotties Contest

Previous Hometown Hottie stepREVIEWs:

ERIN
LETICIA
KENDA
JUDA
JAIME
NICKI
ROBERTA
GILLIAN

Posted in:Hometown Hotties Contest|Maxim|Sharae|stepREVIEWS|Unsorted

2007

28

Sep

I am – stepLINKS of the Day

1 Comment »

I knew this kid a couple years back who was a natural player. Dude got pussy every time he left his house. It just wasn’t a thing for him. He didn’t even try to seduce girls. He was just something they all wanted to get with. I am talking from the hottest girls imaginable to the lesser quality ones but he couldn’t even go to the store or the coffee shop without one striking up a conversation with him and giving him her number. It annoyed him because shit was too accessible so he decided to join the abstinence club at the college he was going to. His goal was to take all these asexual/virginal/born again virgin 20 year olds and turn them onto a better, sexier existence. He was only in the group for a week before realizing that dudes in the abstinence club are fucking lame but the girls weren’t so bad, they were just misguided. I think he ended up breaking 3 of the 5 of them.

If you’re wondering why I am telling you this story, I have no idea why, I just ran into him and I remembered how funny that shit was….Anyway, I’ve decided that I need to make myself famous, because I am tired of being poor, so if any of you virgins have important uncles or friends, get them to put me on TV. Thanks in advance.

Here are my links.

Pornstar or Popstar
GO

Ice T Fondles Coco’s Ass on Stage
GO

Some Abagail Clancy Lookin’ Hot in FHM
GO

So 2 Underage Girls Want to Get Topless and Make Out With Each Other For Joe Francis, then They Sue Him After the Fact…So Joe Francis releases the Video….Proving that Girls are Fucking Stupid….
GO

Some Kylie Minogue Kissing Geri Halliwell Video
GO

Some Dude Tries To Fit As Many Marshmallow’s in His Mouth…
GO

Britney Spears Pirate Panty Upskirt
GO

Some Famous Chick Named Lola Ponce Rockin’ a Pretty Fucking Small Bikini
GO

Israel Shows Off Their Hot Soldier Sluts in Maxim Video
GO

Some Nicole Richie Pregnant in Stripper Shoes…
GO

Adriana Lima’s Thong Shot
GO

Kid Vs Ball Video
GO

Alessanda Ambrosio Showing Off her Bra Video
GO

Lookin Good Sweetheart
GO

Nicole Kidman Porn
GO

Torture George Bush Game
GO

Keeley Hazell Playing Tennis Topless
GO

Dildo Prank in the Elevator
GO

Shakira’s Hips Don’t Lie and They Donated 40 Million Dollars to Peru..That’s A Lot of Money…
GO

Kelly Brook Works the Pole Half Naked….
GO

Heidi Klum Kissing Up On Baby Daddy Seal
GO

Danielle Lloyd Showing Off Her Thong
GO

Play the Party Foul Game
GO

Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
GO

Nicole Richie Goes to DUI School
GO

The Hills Audrina Patridge Flashes Her Panties
GO

Melissa Midwest Goes Hardcore…Finally
GO

Kelly Ripa’s Got No Make-Up On and I’d Still Bang Her…
GO

Katherine McPhee is Engaged and Squating in Short Shorts
GO

Nsync’s Joey Fat One Wants to Bang Britney
GO

Daisy Fuentes Bikini Pictures
GO

Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
GO

Models Yana and Sandy Naked and Touching Each Other
GO

Christina Aguilera Talks About Sex
GO

Hayden Panettiere Wants You….
GO

Steve-O Can’t Find a Condom in a Hotel With a Naked Chick
GO

Selena Spice Video of Her Showing Off Her Body
GO

Hilary Duff Rocks a Push Up Bra
GO

More Pics of Hilary Duff Rockin’ a Push Up Bra
GO

Diddy Demands Respect….
GO

Posh Spice Rockin’ Her Flying Nazi Hat
GO

Michael J Fox Vibrating Video…Sad
GO

Chris Brown Molesting Rihanna
GO

Matthew McConaughey Married That Hot Bikini Model Camilla Alves…Bastard
GO

Some Girl Gets a Pretty Intense Massage…
GO

Alicia Keys – No One Video Dropped Today…Here It Is….
GO

Will.I.Am’s New Video I Got it From My Mamma – Daft Punk Remix….
GO

Some Dude’s Bachelor Party Video
GO

Jessica Alba Gets Her Nails Done
GO

Dad is that you?
GO

Best of Playboy Part 1
GO

Best of Playboy Part 2
GO

Some Idiot Jumps Off a Bridge Because He Thinks the Cops are Chasing Him
GO

Some Photobucket Black Porn
GO

Some More Photobucket Black Porn
GO

Download a Dave Chappelle Live Comedy Show MP3 in the stepFORUM
GO

Download Red Hot Chili Peppers Greatest Hits Album in the Forum
GO

British Slags…..
GO

Period Sex Vile and NSFW
GO

Find Yourself Some Vagina Next Door
GO

Use This Spray to Get Laid Because IT Works and Sex is Better than No Sex…
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS|Unsorted

2007

28

Sep

I am – Lindsay Lohan Gets a Pedicure of the Day

3 Comments »

Here are pictures of Lohan out getting a pedicure for you foot fetishists out there. I am all about Lohan, I think she’s got it going on on all fronts. I never cared that she got fucked from every angle by every dude, I never cared that she was addicted to drugs, I never cared that she went insane, I never cared when I found out that she has herpes and doesn’t tell anyone about them. I just always wanted to bang her, herpes or not and if I ever had the chance I would have done it raw dog in hopes of landing them so that whenever I got an outbreak, I could show them to my friends and brag that my herpes are fuckin’ designer celebrity herpes, a whole different luxurious strain. Reality is, I’ll never bang Lohan but she’s looking pretty good to me, which isn’t saying much, but it’s saying something….