DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2018

04

Jun

Vanessa Hudgens Pussy Dance of the Day

Vanessa Hudgens, someone I don’t write about nearly enough, did a little underwear pussy dance…for the perverts in what could be a bathing suit…but that we know as perverts is the same as underwear that’s why we celebrate bikinis as clothing item…it’s like “Sure it’s a bathing suit that keeps you protected from the elements, and not a bra and panty set that makes us want to jerk off, totally different fabrics you know…one is functional and doesn’t tap into our perversion the other fuels our perversions….WINK WINK”…kind of thing…

Well, she’s a legend in her own right, now that shes into fitness and not fat…from High School musical…to being one of the early adopters of sexting and leaked nudes…to having an amazing bush because she’s a hairy little thing…I am all about it…

Older now, hotter now, hopefully not laser hair removal-ed now after the world BUSH SHAMED HER….hoping she’s a survivor and not someone who is insecure about her hair..ruining my fucking life by getting rid of her bush….

Here’s her pussy dance.

Posted in:SFW|Vanessa Hudgens

2018

04

Jun

Sarah Hyland Spreading Her Legs of the Day

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Sarah Hyland has a weird disease, like so many of these other celebrity child stars, who had parents that I guess had them on weird hormone therapy to keep them youthful, but that instead made them grow up to be weird looking, like some Gary Coleman shit…and Sarah Hyland is a survivor…after at least one Kidney Transplant and many other health issues, that aren’t as exploited as Selena Gomez’s issues…she’s out there living…not dead…and showing off her flexibility..

I never watched modern family, so I never watched her grow up, I just saw her as an adult looking like some genetic weirdo mix-up and found it disturbing that anyone would fuck her..because 18 or not she looked 11…something some would call a talent, on some Benjamn button shit…

Well it turns out that she’s also pretty flexible…and spreading her leg in what I consider a weird social media account – with weird social media content because when you’re raised in an aquarium…weird things happen…reptilian…

Posted in:Sarah Hyland|SFW

2018

04

Jun

Madison Beer Ass of the Day

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Hey Madison Beer – Nice Shorts..

I was actually walking down the street this weekend, as I do, being the object of fitness that I am…you know just walking around….and I saw many women in shorts like this…it’s a trend.

I know young girls have been doing the short short cut off shorts for a while now…but I didn’t realize that it had translated or converted to the 40 year old mom – like she’s trying to stay him or on trend…

It’s the YOGA PANT of the year….I guess…where old ladies like competing with their daughters, to show off their asses that have been fucked substantially more times than their daughters…and it fucking shows…

I was pretty shocked to see it, ass cheek cleavage from the elderly…but it happened…I was there…and she was gardening and it was more amazing that you’d expect it to be.

I support all trends that get women sluttier…NORMALIZE EXHIBITIONISM..

I still don’t really know what Madison Beer does…but it doesn’t matter…

Posted in:Madison Beer|SFW

2018

04

Jun

Lily Rose Depp Hard Nipples of the Day

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Lily Rose Depp is mint..

She may be an entitled rich kid, but who isn’t really these days, everyone seems rich, except for me, and my illegitimate children playing with rocks in various single mother dominated housing projects, can’t actually be entitled, because they are half retards….

But Lily Rose Depp is just surrounded by being the coolest, hottest, richest young thing, with parents who are Johnny Depp..

It’s probably hard for her to not be a brat, but maybe it’s just all so normal to her, all she knows, and that she’s got nothing to prove to the world…but whatever it is, it’s fascinating…and I like it.

There are some rich kids, with rich parents who are just the fucking worst…and irritate you by just looking at them…then there’s Lily Rose Depp who just seems solid…

Maybe I’m writing my own storyline here..maybe I love Edward Scissorhands so much that I am a huge fan of his daughter…maybe…it’s the nipples cuz they hard and speaking to me in code of some sort…

I don’t have the answers.

Posted in:Lily Rose Depp|SFW

2018

04

Jun

Jennifer Aniston Hard Nipples of the Day

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Jennifer Aniston has one thing to offer the world…hard nipples…

Besides Suzanne Somers in the 70s hit show Three’s Company, RIP JOHN RITTER, she’s been the most famous set of hard nipples on TV…at least that is what I assume…Friends was a huge, yet annoying as fuck sitcom, and her nipples were really the only reason to tune in…

It’s been nipples that have helped carry her career, that have helped her get to the level of rich as fuck she is, it may even be the nipples that led to her narcisssism that prevented her from having babies for her career, and maybe from having dudes stick it out with her, because there must be something wrong with her at her core….but that something is not her nipples…those nipples are solid…literally and figuratively…

Posted in:Jennifer Aniston|SFW

2018

04

Jun

Iskra Lawrence Big Girl of the Day

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They say that Big Girl’s don’t cry, especially when they’ve figured out a scam that involves them being big girls, so that they can eat their way through pretty much anything, and that alone gets them celebrated as some kind of talent that the world wants to support, that brands want to pay, when really she’s just exploiting the fat girl plight, strictly based on her finding an angle that worked for her to get to where she’s at….in terms of celebrity.

If she stayed a skinny girl trying to be a model, she’d be no where, she’s not hot, but chow down on 5000 calories a day of pure carbs and fatten the fuck up, like anyone who tried to get fat would….release a relevant video about being fat…and next thing you know…DOLLAR SIGNS CHA CHING CHA CHING cash register sounds….

I don’t buy her lies…

Posted in:Iskra lawrence|SFW

2018

04

Jun

Halsey Hard Nipples of the Day

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They say, once you go black their’s no going back, which I guess is something I’ve heard my entire life, whether from racists who are like “cuz no white guy will take you back”…and I have met many white men who were offended and wouldn’t fuck girls they knew who fucked black guys…which always blew my mind because I guess I’m not racist, or into the cuckold, or figure if I was a white girl, I’d probably bang black guys too…because white guys are fucking fat small dicked lamed as fuck people with no swag…that’s not to say I have a black guy fetish…it’s just to say white dudes are lame as fuck…

Point being…I guess it applies to coming out to the world as having a black dad, something that shouldn’t be an angle, but that she’s using as an angle, and has been trying to prove her blackness to social media ever since she announced it like it’s a thing….

So an uninteresting raver chick….is now a black cultural experience having some kind of revolution and the whole thing is pretty dumb…but when nipples are involved we must celebrate.

Posted in:Halsey|SFW

2018

04

Jun

Emily Blunt Bikini of the Day

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Emily Blunt looks like she’s been smoking too many blunts – and like she’s had a bad case of the munchies…for far too many nights…

I blame the legalization of recreational cannabis in California…

That’s all I’ve got, mainly because I don’t know who Emily Blunt is, maybe James Blunt’s wife…remember him? Is he still a thing…who cares…

Posted in:Emily Blunt|SFW

2018

04

Jun

Elsa Hosk is Topless of the Day

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Elsa Hosk is on Vacation, living her best life, showing off to the world what being a tall and skinny Swedish girl, who was once a professional basketball player, on some Steph Curry shit, before one of her coaches suggested, as he was “Larry Nassar-ing” her, as coaches do, I mean why else would a grown man want to be around young women doing athletics, tall young women, with their little shorts on, sweating and titties bouncing more than their offensive play, because as all the girls jog to keep up with the ball, their titties bounce along with them….

It’s obviously not from a passion for the sport, but rather a passion for the hot young chicks, who end up as Lingerie models, because they are used to being naked for you, as it is part of your secret drill for your star players.

The point is she’s old, almost over, was late to the game, but fantastic…

Posted in:Elsa Hosk|SFW

2018

04

Jun

Bella Thorne Hard Nipples of the Day

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I am part of the problem. I was a fan of Bella Thorne when she first started popping up on social media. I thought to myself – look at this horse faced, man faced, redheaded slut from Disney, who was clearly part of some touring circus or vaudeville family, just a modern version, because teens don’t end up on TV from Florida without a whore mom whoring them…not to mention everyone from Florida, except maybe the Scientologists up in St Pete’s are pretty fucking whorish and down for whatever to get ahead….when I think of the two people I know from Florida, they are both in porn.

Point being…Bella Thorne has gone from cute, fitness, half naked girl with implants from Disney, to raver, weirdo, like Miley did before her, and sure the tits are still good, the stomach and body still young, but the rest of her is just boring, lame, annoying…and that makes me kinda hate her and see her for what she is..tranny -faced.

But she’s the biggest deal on Social Media….get sucked in…

Here she is looking like a tranny in a bikini

Posted in:Bella Thorne|SFW