DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2018

11

Jul

Sophie Mudd’s Massive Tits of the Day

Sophie Mudd is a set of monster tits, who isn’t that cute, who isn’t that marketable, who isn’t much more than a set of monster tits on social media…

But….

Monster tits, on their own, are fantasitc, entertainment and all we really need to validate and appreciate a woman.

When you have tits like this, that you don’t strap down or hide, but celebrate and try to get as far as you can with them, through sexualizing them, it’s ok for use to stare…that’s what you want us to do.

And with tits like this, on a small frame, there’s something that genetically makes no sense, but that is totally wonderful…

Sophie Mudd…is worth our time…or at least worth staring at…so stare.

I don’t know if there’s much more substance to her, but I don’t think there needs to be. This is quite sufficient….EVEN IF IT REQUIRES NO EFFORT ON HER PART..

This is a genetic defect working for a girl, unlike a genetic defect like being born with one leg, or no arms, no quite working for the person, but being a handicap that may get them bonus money when panhandling…

This is the genetic defect that is wonderful….It’s not terminal disease..like Selena Gomez…it’s erotic…. Keep it up.

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Posted in:SFW|Sophie Mudd

2018

11

Jul

Candice Swanepoel Post Pregnancy Bikini of the Day

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I guess Candice Swanepoel shat out her second kid, after being chronically pregnant the last few years, thanks to getting addicted to being cummed inside, or family planning, or who the fuck knows, she is rich and it doesn’t matter, she can do what she wants…

Well, she should have waited before getting into a bikini, because a deflated Candice Swanepoel after being stretched the fuck out is disturbing to me.

I do not like breeding. I do find it unnatural even if it is totally natural and why humans exist.

I do get that her genetics and ego are important for her to narcissistically reproduce…

But I do not get dudes who are into moms in bikinis…ever.

I know she will tone up, there’s millions of dollars on the line..but instead of waiting for that moment to impress us all. This is what happened.

You know to set a baseline on how ravaged she is so when the VS fashion show she timed her pregnancy rolls around…she’ll befit and we can all say “OMG look at the improvement”…still awful….

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Posted in:Candice Swanepeol|SFW

2018

11

Jul

Rita Ora Lingerie for Instagram of the Day

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Rita Ora is in lingerie – because she’s Rita Ora and that’s what she does.

I could tell you a story about how I was at a Sam Smith Grammy party in 2016 or 2015, that I snuck into thanks to Katy Perry’s lesbian assistant, and while waiting in line, after Ed Sheeran called me “bro”, for some free drinks because it was open bar, I was behind who I thought was Kelly Osbourne…but who turned out to be Rita Ora after the person I was with told me – That is Rita Ora…

Now I don’t know if you’ve ever seen Kelly Osbourne but she’s a big, and thus my first hand account of Rita Ora, being literally a foot away from her, was that she was Kelly Osbourne…

I think Taylor Swift and Katy Perry were at that part also, beefing over Diplo or something…I mean open bar at celebrity events, what do you think I remember anything…cuz I don’t…..

You probably won’t believe that story…but Rita Ora knows she was there…and so do I….

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Posted in:Rita Ora|SFW

2018

11

Jul

Tracee Ellis Ross Bikini of the Day

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Tracee Ellis Ross is something I would be fine never fucking seeing ever in my life.

I get it, her mom is Diana Ross.

I get it, her sister in law is Ashley Simspon…

But the topless pool pics, all artistic but barely erotic…just make no sense to me.

I will post them anyway – Inclusivity you know. All women created equal. Size inclusive, race inclusive, etc.

Posted in:SFW|Tracee Ellis Ross

2018

11

Jul

Lea Michele Tits of the Day

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Do you think guys who marry trannies are fucking queers?

Or is it hetero and progressive because they accept gender as a choice not as a biological marker.

You’d think queers would be against all things that look like women, even with a dick….

Or is tranny loving it’s own fetish?

Asking for myself, curious about Lea Michele’s fiance, who clearly is pulling his own kind of K-Fed….

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Posted in:Lea Michele|SFW

2018

11

Jul

Vanessa Hudgens Bikini Day 2 of the Day

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I have said it before and I’ll say it again. I am a big fan of Vanessa Hudgens….from Disney kid on a hugely popular show, to whatever the fuck else she does, she’ll always be one of the early adopters to sending nude pics to her boyfriend, who leaked the pics to the internet, allowing us all to see her thick bush and titties, starting a trend that I will forever be grateful for. I will never forget what she contributed to the world during High School Musical years…and whatever she’s up to now, she’s got a A+ from me…I support it.

These are day 2 of bikini selfies, hotter cuz we know she’s got pics of the bikini pulled to the side on her camera roll…and that alone makes her great.

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Posted in:SFW|Vanessa Hudgens

2018

11

Jul

Mena Suvari’s Bikini Top of the Day

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Hey Mena, from that angle, you don’t look like you have an alien of a head…..you know this picture makes me laugh because most girls are angling themselves so that they don’t look fat…and have mastered the perfect look or pose to make their insecure spots look good or less obvious…they pop the booty, or as it’s called PUSH the booty, they all have a good side….and have spent years doing it…and in Mena Suvari’s case…she’s like “show tit, angle head like this, and I’ll look like a human, no one will notice I am visiting from afar to see how our experiments are going”….and I find it funny knowing she probably took ten pics of this before feeling like her forehead was just right and I guess that’s why I’m posting this.

She is old though….and if memory serves me well…is that even the expression…I remember she had a great round booty with the same surface area as her forehead so it was fucking huge…where’s that booty now…in an era of all girls having booty…cuz this cleavage is less eventful…that full on 40 year old ass.

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Posted in:Mena Suvari|SFW

2018

11

Jul

AnnaLynne McCord In Underwear of the Day

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AnnaLynne McCord is garbage – in and out of her underwear – I’d say her street value is no more than 150 an hour – like a backpages whore back when back pages whores existed – before everyone went to jail rich as fuck after creating backpages – pimps.

She has been on TV, which I guess makes her more valuable than a 50 dollar an whore…

But there’s really nothing interesting about this ghetto girl…they must be broke by now…it’s been a few years since she was on TV…that money must go quick and this is the “i keep holding on” moment in her life…and I’ll stare but I WON’T CARE. Copyright. Trademark.

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Posted in:Annalynne McCord|SFW

2018

11

Jul

Lexi Thompson – Golfer Legs of the Day

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The golf bros must fucking love this one….

I’ve never heard of her, but I am also not in middle management, wearing Khakis and a polo, wearing a visor an having water cooler talks about my golf game, or practicing my swing in my cubicle office while on a conference call, because you know air golf swing to practice technique is what your game is missing…like air guitar practice is what you’re rockstar dreams are missing…both make you look like the asshole you are.

This girl is straight up white girl, that white guys fucking love, you can tell and she’s dressing provocative…in a “that’s not Arnold Palmer” or “What happened to Greg Norman”….”I guess they let girls in the club, cuz dudes like to fuck girls or jerk off thinking about fucking the girl”..

Her name is Lexi Thompson, a porn name for a porno white girl golfer, for you to stare at…

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Posted in:Lexi Thompson|SFW

2018

11

Jul

Maitland Ward Dykes it Down of the Day

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Show NSFW Content

I am a failure when I only have 6 fucking Patrons on Patreon while Maitland Ward makes 45,000 dollars on the shit per m
onth…but I don’t hold your lack of support against you…I hated you before you didn’t give me money…

I find it very weird that Maitland Ward, the sex worker from Boy Meets World, who used some Boy Meets World revival to Sex Work harder, and who I used to post conversations she had with people about anal sex for money hook-ups, that she personally asked me to remove….is now cool with being a sex worker.

She could have made way more than her 45k a month, that I can’t believe she makes 45k a month…because who would pay for this dog shit..who now does lesbian sex. It makes more sense.

She should have done things so much differently, but she doesn’t listen to my advice and here’s her weird sex…

This is heavily awkward, weird and unsexy…but this is what happens when you were famous at 20 and forgotten by 21….only to be remembered….you post whatever you can to get noticed, even dyke sex.

This is heavily disturbing, embarrassing, and not hot in the least…but it is happening, I wonder who her co-star lesbian is, but not really. All these people are useless.

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Posted in:Maitland Ward|NSFW