DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2016

03

Mar

Kaley Cuoco Fake Tits for Cosmo of the Day

I guess Kaley Cuoco offended feminists….so she turned to Cosmo to show off her fake tits, and say:

“Of course I’m a fucking feminist. Look at me. I bleed feminism. I get equal pay to my male costars on a big show, I have my own home, I’m as independent as you could possibly be.”

Because everyone is a fucking feminist now, even though I’m more into the kinds of feminists who get naked on the internet for free, instead of getting paid to get naked on the internet, because they are sexual beings, taking ownership on their sexuality, all in efforts to really just appease their egos and find a fanbase of men to pander to….

Where as Kaley Cuoco is the kind of feminist who I actually respect, because she’s not a crying for attention telling everyone she’s a feminist because just does her fucking thing and makes more money than you, she’ll have over 100,000,000 in the bank at the end of her stint as the hot but accessible girl on Big Bang THeory…she’s more than just a bunch of CHAPTER 1 Women’s Study nonsense…before she dropped out of school to pursue her ART of sending nudes to pervert men to jerk off to….

Which is too bad, cuz I’d rather be staring at Kaley Cuoco’s Asshole right now…

Posted in:Kaley Cuoco|SFW

2016

03

Mar

Joanna Krupa for PETA of the Day

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Joanna Krupa does anything and everything she can to get noticed or to stay relevant, not that she was ever relevant, don’t think I meant to say she was ever relevant, even when she was on TV, which was her most relevant, she still was so low level and barely relevant……

But she’s no longer on TV, so anyone looking for some free endorsement, even low level, really fucking low level, I’m talking not even the low hanging fruit but rather the three week old fruit already on the ground that wasn’t even good enough for the squirrels to eat low grade….you know some barely a prositute that was on TV once..has someone to turn to…

She’s got zero going on and even when she had things going on, she had nothing going on, she was a fucking Maxim model in the 90s, so trying to find anything that will feature her to make her feel like she still matters, or works or has value and they feature her because it’s better than getting all press is good press, even if it’s Joanna Krupa press….and the only people who will run with the story, like this PETA don’t wear wool because it hurts Sheep, at least if you get your wool at some kind of horrible slaughter house…because I track hookers…like a hooker GPS…it’s still free….and free is good…

Posted in:Joanna Krupa|SFW

2016

03

Mar

Kendall Jenner’s Nipples on the Runway of the Day

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Kendall Jenner is walking runway fashion shows now and I sure as fuck hope she’s doing it for free because she needs the credibility as a model and the brand figures since they family and whores and push product – it will be good for sales and social media presence…

I hope the brand didn’t seek her and GIGI out as models, because they are the biggest thing in fashion, you know because they can afford the products and are the target market for the products, so wearing the products is organic..rather than hiring some Russian model who can’t afford a Toyota Camry…you know these are girls with funds…let’s use them as the leaders of the people who can afford our shit…

I guess the only good thing about Kendall is that she’s showing her nipples, but also that she’s not fat, because really, modeling requires zero fucking skill and if she was plus sized doing this and pulling it off, I’d be mad, where as now I just think it’s funny how lazy people are – and how they buy into hype…but they always have so whatever…

here are her nipples..

Posted in:Kendall Jenner

2016

03

Mar

Bella Thorne’s Snapchat Party of the Day

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Hollywood chicks are so fucking cheesy…but then again I guess it’s the general way the young people of today are…that’s not to say that Bella Thorne is young, I’m still convinced she’s in her 40s which could be an overshot, but definitely not just turned 18, unless she’s had some hard life and hit puberty when she was 4….

Point being, that hip hop is so fucking white, it’s pop music, and even when girls get naked in photoshoots, their intentions, no matter how wordy and annoying they are about it, just isn’t authentic.

The world used to have some edge, some flavor, some attitude, now it’s all one big Disney Sponsored McDonald’s ad…I mean just the other day I was watching some story on some girl celebrating her ABORTION that went viral for being shocking, I googled the site, and it’s owned by fucking DISNEY

EVEN edgy hipster abortion stories are fucking DISNEY produced..

Fuckers…who fuck…girls like this…sexualizing them…to market them and they just accept it with open hard, open mouth, and tight gripped palms…

Either way, she’s trying to get a viral dance, let’s see her keep up this narcissistic hustle..I dig it.

Here are some SUPER HIGH RES SCREENSHOTS

Here she is doing fitness porn….because gotta put out that jerk off material..

Posted in:Bella Thorne|SFW

2016

03

Mar

Devon WIndsor in a Bikini of the Day

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Devon Windsor is the 21 year old with a 21 year old ass – who I assume is pretty big on instagram – because I am looking at her instagram while writing this and she’s at close to 500k, which is a lot of people for someone I’ve never heard of…

Apparently, she’s looped into the Bieber group of Kendall and Kylie girls who the brands love using now….

But more importantly, she’ got a great ass, as she should she’s 21 years old and a fucking model…and I guess the good news is that she’s actually a model, she’s actually tall, and she’s not plus sized…which is why she works for Victoria’s Secret and has for 2 years….which is pretty impressive for a girl from the Midwest…who was destined to work the cornfields / live in the suburbs with a meth addiction…

Here’s a round-up her social media pics…

Posted in:Devon Windsor|SFW

2016

03

Mar

The Reese Witherspoon Bikini Pic of the Day

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Reese Witherspoon in a bathing suit, thank god it’s not a bikini, not that I’m a religious man, but she’s a religious woman, that’s why she’s worth more money than god as a leader or “A-Lister” in the most evil of industries, not to mention a mom who left her husband which is totally unchristian, but still pays him support because she ruined him and she stomped over him to get her own oscar, an oscar that was more important to her than her christ…so important…she married her fucking agent who ran the agency to ensure the best gigs…

Media / Entertainment / Fashion is all fucking corrupt…but not as corrupt as jerking off to Reese Witherspoon in a bathing suit….

How is this news everyone is talking about, probably because it’s terrifying,…and she’s not even 40 yet…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Reese Witherspoon|SFW

2016

03

Mar

Chubby Ariel Winter in a Photoshoot of the Day

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People are loving Ariel Winter right now, I don’t really understand why, but I assume with her having a solid PR team and an audience of perverts who love recently turned 18 year olds from their favorite sitcoms..

I don’t even know anyone who watches sitcoms…but I assume they exist, they must, why else would these shows be on TV….there are a lot of people in America, who own TVS, and it probably makes sense…but they are probably fucking creeps, the kind of creep who sexualized this 18 year old as she was growing up on Modern Family so much she cut off her tits…unless she cut off her tits to try to thin herself out, I know girls who have done that in the past…but the reality is….the only thing that worked for them was drug addiction and eating disorder…two things that could have benefitted off her TIT fat for survival…you know when all this falls apart and her child star ass fades into “no one gives a fuck about you”..

Here’s her 18 year old more like 48 year old ass in short shorts….

TO SEE THE PAPARAZZI PICS OF THIS FATTY IN SHORT CLICK HERE
TO SEE THE PAPARAZZI PICS OF THIS FATTY FAT IN SHORTS CLICK HERE
TO SEE THE PAPARAZZI PICS OF THIS FATTY VERY FAT IN SHORTS CLICK HERE
TO SEE THE PAPARAZZI PICS OF THIS FATTY TO SEE THE PAPARAZZI PICS OF THIS FATTY VERY FAT IN TIGHT SHORTS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Ariel Winter|SFW

2016

03

Mar

This is Miss Great Britain 2015/16 of the Day

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I don’t know if you keep track of beauty pageant’s from around the world, but I don’t.

From my experience, the girls are too fucking cheesy, big haired, bad make-up, straight from the 90s, all dull in personality, even morons, with zero edge in their canned responses…until they lose their minds and end up doing porn…which is when I normally notice them…

So I dont know the levels of these pageants – from Miss World to Miss Universe to Miss Usa to who the fuck cares….right…

But this is Zara Holland, who is Miss Great Britain 2015/16….but I can’t imagine in her see through dress that this is some Christian based pageant of America…where girls win Scholarships or whatever it is they win, I am going to assume that this is a title they give a reality show star from LAD MAG, Page 3 bullshit, who shows up to events flashing her twat while wasted…looking like porn sluts…also from the 90s….I mean the hot or celebrated girls from the UK look like this 98 percent of the time..and that’s not necessarily a good thing…even if this Zara chick is a great thing…

What I am saying is, I don’t know what she’s won, but she’s showing up to events in her underwear and a sheer dress with caked on make-up and that is the kind of pageant winner I’m into…even if she’s not even hot..hot doesn’t matter, what does matter is her busting out of her dress…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:SFW|Zara Holland

2016

03

Mar

This is what Slovakian Tennis Looks like of the Day

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Good thing Dominika Cibulkova is good at tennis, because we know where she’d be if she wasn’t…

She wouldn’t have 7 million dollars in career wins…

She wouldn’t be touring the world with her 4 Women’s Tennis Association wins…But that doesn’t mean she wouldn’t be touring the world…with some Russian billionaire who likes to keep the top tier sex workers to himself…because according me, which is obviously fact…all Eastern Europeans, who are Olympic Athletes or disgusting looking, are “models” and in being models there is a spectrum of level of hooker they are…either embraced by fashion media and dating billionaires…or embraced by porno and webcam media sold to americans for 10,000 dollars…but models nonetheless…

I guess what I am saying is that I’ve always loved women’s tennis, from the panty flashes to the sexualized grunts that sound like they are getting blasted up the ass…hard…with each swing….except when the VENUS WILLIAMS sisters are the ones playing….but amongst the VENUS WILLIAMS sister is this magic….like Dominika Cibulkova…the way it should be….

Posted in:Dominika Cibulkova|SFW

2016

03

Mar

Hannah Davis for MAXIM of the Day

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The only problem with me not being a dot com billionaire, being the age of the average dot com billionaire, reminding me I should have done actual dot com billionaire work, instead of low level blogging…..I digress…

The only problem with me not being a billionaire is that I can’t play first hand the very interesting game that can be applied to all Sports Illustrated models…that I call “Demi More Indecent Proposal”….where you throw numbers at a girl for sex until she agrees…

Whenever I do a post on one of these SI girls, who I know gets very little to no paid work, I know….they are either rich kids or on some other program using rich guys for that rich person life they live…

I just don’t have evidence of their price..but I do know SI is a great escort agency or platform to meet the perfect kind of guy into hiring girls like this…

Her name is Hannah Davis…she’s in the NEW maxim…which is probably as bad at the old maxim…but the old maxim used to always try to sue me…so I like the new Maxim better because at least they feature babes…since hooker or not…this is a babe..

Just as Derek Jeter, who proposed to her, which in “hooker world” is bought another year with her so she shuts the fuck up about his level of commitment to her, as she tries to secure her future and can’t give one dude her prime years without commitment…right?

And what it comes down to is I wonder who pays the rent, utilities, food in that household…right? Hooker.

I’m pretty sure I’ve posted these pics before…oh well…repeat… I am too lazy to look and I already wrote this genius….