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2023

11

May

1989 Throwback Monica Bellucci Tit of the Day

Monica Bellucci is the kind of girl your Italian barber in his 70s fucking loves, you know with the pin-up picture of her to remind him of the OLD COUNTRY he left to cut hair in America, better than being a bricklayer I guess.

She’s typically praised for being the iconic set of Italian tits, you know the reference point when you meet some DAGO GUINEA WOP in the Italian grocery store eating pasta with her big saggers, you say “those EYETALLIONS know how to tit”.

These are of her at 25 years old, that’s before she was in a relationship with TIM BURTON and clearly before her tits really grew into themselves, if anything the tits look very 1980s and there’s something special about that….mainly because it took a certain kind of opportunist to become a TITTY model, even in EUROPE where this is considered wearing a bathing suit….

All this to say, Italy is wonderful and so are their tits, even in the 80s.

Posted in:Monica Bellucci

2023

11

May

Asshole Behind Thong Thursday of the Day

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The thong is a pretty important panty style at least in my life.

The thong has taught me some pretty interesting lessons over the two and a half decades that they’ve been penetrating the mainstream….

Those lessons are really just one lesson and that is that women will do anything for the sake of fitting in with other women, appeasing other women while thinking they are appeasing men, trying to be sexy and attractive, and not being their own independent thinker.

The THONG, at least according to any woman who has been in a relationship long enough to be honest about the THONG while committing to either no underwear or BIKINI FULL BACK PERIOD PANTIES, is something chicks say are abusive, uncomfortable, that dig into their assholes while not covering their assholes, making you wonder why the fuck wear a panty if it doesn’t do the one job it has of catching the drips…..

So women will abuse themselves all day by wearing uncomfortable underwear, not because they want to, but because they think that’s their duty, and that kind of hive mind thinking is important, at least when it comes to slutty, so KEEP IT UP.

The THONG is a hell of a panty….YOU CAN SEE THE ASSHOLE peeking out from it and THAT is important because the ASSHOLE is an important orifice in this genderless time!

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Posted in:Asshole Behind Thong

2023

11

May

Dua Lipa Bikini of the Day

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Dua Lipa’s a huge international pop star, the official story is that she was born in Albania, or Kosovo which I guess was basically Yugoslavia during the war, before being shipped off in a shipping container to the UK where she struggled so hard she became an international pop sensation.

I don’t know if human trafficking was her official storyline, the truth is she could just be a rich kid from the UK who was born in the UK after her rich family moved there to escape the war in their Mother country, but that’s far less dark and mysterious and it doesn’t fuel the conspiracies I like to fuel because fake news is real news if you believe it hard enough.

I do know that they say she was a model, who didn’t like the pressure of being fit or thin, so she turned to Youtube to sing cover songs, that miraculously went viral, got her a record deal, and the rest is fucking history, with that pile of hits under her belt….she must be a real hard worker, a real self starter, because there’s no way she had a team behind her making this happen, it was all her in this era of gig economy influencer, right, that’s why so many other talents who try as hard never get seen…..or noticed….because they just didn’t work as hard as Dua Lipa.

Anyway, she’s got some tits, she wears bikinis, she’s no longer plus sized or a victim of the unrealistic body expectations she’s been quoted complaining about, and if you’re going to be a pop star, you might as well bring the bikini pics to the perverts who you rape with your shit pop music…I DID NOT CONSENT TO HEARING THIS SHIT…..RAPE RAPE RAPE…

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:Dua Lipa

2023

11

May

Titty Drop Thursday of the Day

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Titty Drops are the act of slowly releasing the tit to the world from it’s oppressive captive, the shirt, bra, or really any clothing that stands between us and the tit.

It’s the turn on the camera, put it in slow motion and pull the top up or down, depending on how much bounce you want for your artistic version of a tit flash.

The winning TITTY drop is pretty much all titty drops, because we get to see the tit, but for the sake of making girls continuously produce titty drops, I like to think of it as a sport like Figure Skating and Gymnastics, where judges decide on the artistic merit, technical difficulty and overall execution of said drop.

It’s not the biggest tit that wins, but having some weight in your tits can help, it’s about trying to be different, while basically doing what society is telling you to do for internet content, because I remember an era when NO tits were flashed because women feared repercussions and future self shame, but NOT anymore, be thankful of that!

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Posted in:Titty Drop

2023

11

May

Avril Lavigne Thong Selfie of the Day

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I don’t know if this is actually a 40 year Avril Lavigne, or the replacement who she is rumored to have been replaced by back in the early days of Avril Lavigne, something that may just be some racist and misogynistic conspiracies of the internet, where Pepe and 4Chan plot JFK’s return as the anti-christ or Messiah, it’s all very confusing stuff.

For those who don’t know, Avril was apparently replaced with another actor because she died in a car accident after her first hit and they know as an even enterprise that runs the media, they can swap out people with other people and no one will be the wiser, they’ll think, oh she doesn’t quite look the same, isn’t it weird that her eye colors are different or that her nose is a totally different shape, must be the aging process, or the stress of the road, or maybe the angle of the shot.

So believe what you want to believe, but I believe this new WHALE TAIL marketing hook she’s discovered, since she posted a similar one last week, is pretty fucking weird. In part because she’s 40, but maybe she remembers the late 90s when she was too cool of a Tom Boy skater boy to respect the BIMBOS in their tight pants doing the WHALE TAIL, while secretly wanting to be one, now’s her chance. Or maybe she’ll just do anything for attention on this recent album and tour after learning how to social media market from Bella Thorne’s handler, that MODSUN guy, who she was dating.

The point of the story, Avril Lavigne’s in a G-String, that’s the official narrative, because she’s more than just a mall brand skater girl with shitty pop music they tried to pretend was punk, while making millions….she’s also a low level thirsty slut into flashing panties on the internet for likes and we wouldn’t have it any other way.

Maybe next time she’ll post her pulling the panties up inside her until reaching orgasm, the way we like our panty fetish. Baby steps. Walk before running. Dabblin’ or dipping a toe in…..it’s a start.

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:Avril Lavigne

2023

11

May

Tanline Thursday of the Day

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Tanlines are so culturally relevant, it makes me assume that the eroticism or fetish around the tanline has gone on since humans started wearing clothing, so that our retard pre-historic man mind, assuming you believe in the whole theory of evolution they push on you in attempts to kill god, you know that you were once a sea fungus that decided to become a primate instead of a dinosaur or snake….seems likely.

However, if we did evolve from primates and we slowly and half retardedly invented clothing, only to have said clothing removed during a primal gang rape as we’ll assume procreation happened back when we were more animalistic than we are now, that at least one of those caveman came a little harder, a littler further, a little more volume because he could see where the Wooly Mammoth pelts once covered the bitch up.

So, I figure whether girls are out in the sun in bikini, or at the tanning, or getting sprayed in the comfort of their own home with chemicals that are designed to emulate the sun, because they’ve been convinced the sun causes cancer but chemicals don’t….the tannin matters.

I am sure all those sexual offenders in prison for rape who have recently transitioned to women because they want to be impregnating bitches in the female ward instead of getting fucked up the ass even TANLINE, likely from smearing feces on themselves since there is no sun in prison, or self tanner, but that’s just how deep the tanline goes and this is MY weekly TRIBUTE….

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Posted in:Tanlines

2023

10

May

Denise Richards Couch Humper of the Day

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The Denise Richards humiliation train keeps on going, but more importantly, it keeps on giving, because I may find it insane that the losers of the world would subscribe to see this shit, but then again you have to factor in just how big of a loser a dude can be, where his glory days or brain injury happened in 1999 and like Y2K, his brain shut down and he’s forever been stuck there…..

There are dudes who do some weird shit, you may be one of them, you may have been in situations where you’ve even said to yourself “that was weird, I went too far with that fetish” and I don’t expect too much out of dudes….there is enough stunted, awkward, half retarded perverts to go around.

It’s Denise Richards who is weird. She is targeting the losers for money, she’s scheming and manipulating and I hold her accountable. She’s all ASSHOLE BEHIND THONG, while being TOO old to wear a thong….publicly doing SEX work, while simultaneously being a serious enough ex celebrity….

It’s got to be a troll, like she lost a bet, she’s likely TOO rich to be doing this, unless she invested in MADOFF or on BITCOIN at it’s HIGH…it just doesn’t add up beyond her fulfilling her own weird exhibitionist fetish and ultimately, it’s pretty fucking hilarious to watch unfold….

Old, rotten, expired, yogurt-y discharge and all….this is the kind of COMEDY I appreciate, because it is definitely HILARIOUS!

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:Denise Richards

2023

10

May

Workout Wednesday of the Day

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I just watched a skinny bitch, probably with eating disorder, but not an aggressive enough eating disorder to give her a heart attack while she ran around the park in her bike shorts and sports bra, but an eating disorder that was aggressive enough for her to be skinny as shit with a round and fit ass, like she works out all day and compared to all the THEYS and the THEMS I see walking around, all hormonally fucked, fat and dumpy, grey skinned and monstrous, blue haired and clearly mentally unstable, some bearded some not, with zipper tits, or mini estrogen supplement tits, it’s nice to still see a lady who gets it enough to get out there and burn off the stick of gum and Diet Coke she drank for lunch, like we were still in the 90s, when model bodies mattered…

I endorse health, wellness, fitness and fighting the fat, because fat is fucking gross, so here’s some workout bitches working out…

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Posted in:Workout

2023

10

May

Chelsea Handler Topless Promoting Sterilization of the Day

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Chelsea Handler is making some kind of fake news content around her tits, by calling them real even though I am pretty sure they’re fake tits, but if you say they aren’t then they aren’t. Who are you to question a woman, MISOGYNIST.

In this video where she’s holding her tits, she’s pushing some weird propaganda about encouraging men to get their balls clipped in a Vasectomy for birth control, which I guess is a better approach than pushing ABORTION, but still some weird feminist agenda that’s so distant from REAL LIFE, but that in their closed off world of celebrity, seems to be an ISSUE of the times…..that they need to get behind and promote…like the trans agenda…or really anything that involves sterilizing people.

She’s got the most aggressive filters and GLAM on yet she looks fucking hideous, so luckily for us she’s got her tits in her hands to distract us from whatever the fuck this bullshit is.

Not only does it push really weak jokes about how dudes don’t like using condoms with her nasty box, or that IUDs feel like MOUSE TRAPS on her HPV cervix….its’ ALSO scripted and ACTED OUT by someone who claims to be a professional….a pro….a high paid talent…yet it feels like it’s from a group of elderly women at the home working on a video workshop as one of their organized old person activities.

I still think her tits are fake and saying that there’s nothing wrong with fake tits, even though there is….because they cause inflammation, they perpetuate lies that fake tits are equal to natural big tits, and more importantly….they just fuel the insecurity these people who think men hate women yet try to appease men with their face filters Clearly have.

In conclusion, Handler is TRASH, her hand bra trash, her face trash and her performance in this video trash, her comedy trash, and if people are into this kind of thing, BLOCK and DELETE, they don’t matter in the world we want for ourselves…

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:Chelsea Handler

2023

10

May

Pussy Wedgie Wednesday of the Day

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There are days that I leave the house, or fox hole I call a house, where I spend my days sitting in the dark updating a dumb fucking website, in efforts to see all the tight pants being jacked up the cunts, so that I get to see a version of random cunts that only pussy eating tight pants can bring.

There was a time when the camel toe was really something reserved for the 60 year old mom of 4 who recently lost 50 pounds thanks to Oprah and Slim fast, just walking through Walmart pussy first, which you’d expect because those lips had seen so much….but now….it’s a fashion trend, and girls are standing in front of their full length mirror, like the narcissists they all are, jacking their pants into their pussies for style…making seeing a version of random cunts that only pussy eating tight pants can bring far more common and enjoyable.

I’m all in on Pussy Wedgie Wednesday….

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Posted in:Camel Toe