DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2023

10

May

Halsey Almost Upskirt of the Day

Halsey is some bullshit who has climbed the ladder to rich and famous by being involved in some viral songs for the retard generation that don’t even know what real singing is, but know what viral songs on TikTok will get them views, most are normally computer generated and faker than Halsey’s mom tits.

She played some bullshit story to the rich people who found it endearing about how she was homeless, back when she was in the party circuit hanging out with the DJs who gave her her break….thanks to her throat skills….and rich people buy into that shit aggressively because they are empty and like to connect to sad poverty stories when it’s one of their own to feel like they’ve got more depth….so they ate it up.

She exploited the fact that she’s half black, despite never being exposed to any racism because she looks more ASIAN than anything, and I hate race baiters who try to cry for attention or draw attention to how diverse they are, especially after they’ve scammed the world for riches and fame.

She’s currently breaking up with her baby daddy, she’s a mom now, and ANOTHER statistic of a woman raising a future criminal in a broken home….

She’s looking like she’s growing her hair back after a cancer treatment, or two, probably HPV, because getting famous comes with RISKS.

She’s showing off her SOLES, not her SOUL because she sold that a while ago….and there’s a TAMPON string on the heel, but unfortunately for us, we can’t see where the rest of the tampon is because she’s being strategic in her upskirt shit!

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Posted in:Halsey

2023

10

May

Weed Wednesday of the Day

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I may not be a weed smoker but that doesn’t mean I don’t respect the uplifting Rasta / Hippie lifestyle, just being high, laid back, medicated all day….it’s a good time, assuming it increases a woman’s libido and doesn’t actually replace it with needing another joint…

I do find it pretty suspicious that the government is legalizing weed everywhere, either they find the fact that it is illegal idiotic and that they can make money off it, which is usually the motivation, or they want us all medicated like when they put the fluoride in theatre and spray us from planes with lithium…..CONSPIRACY THEORISTS…

You know that they aren’t legalizing it to be cool, since they are all nerds, like going to their birthday party out of sympathy and being the only one there, but being gifted all you can drink for showing up, despite the nerd not drinking, fun, but it feels a bit like a set up.

I guess with the weed smokers out there, there’s going to be a weird section of nerds who wear the pot leaf march, who identify by their weed smoking like it’s special and not government sanctioned, which I guess is who these women are targeting since cool weed smokers are probably not in need to subscribing to OnlyFans of girls they don’t know to sext with sex bots hired to manage OnlyFans from link farms in the Philippines,

The point is, Weed can be smoked, or used as a tactic to lure in nerds by being a prop in nudes, so here’s some weed girls as a warning to you!

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Posted in:Weed

2023

10

May

Sophie Mudd Slutty Tits of the Day

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Looks like we’ve made it, I’m just not sure what making it really means, since I’m not writing this from my palace, or my luxury villa in some far off tropical paradise, but the truth is, with the amount of time I’ve spent updating a website on the internet, I fucking should be, so maybe we haven’t made it at all, but at least we have each other, but do we really? I mean I can’t think of anything you’ve done for me lately….but that’s not how our friendship goes, this isn’t transactional, I don’t mind bringing you the goods other people spend their time producing like some kind of Robin Hood too lazy to produce my own content, but less lazy than just passively glancing at it on social media….

Her name is Sophie Mudd, she has giant tits, went viral for those giant tits, did a whole “share for share” marketing tactic with other ladies who were trying to grow their social reach, before realizing that it’s hard to monetize millions of followers unless you sell your own brand or your own nudes, because Skinny Teas and other low hanging ads are few and far between and you ain’t getting rich off it, but those nude motherfuckers, that shit pays.

What we can learn from Sophie Mudd is that there’s a process in being a busty girl where you use the tits to get noticed, to get followers, but then you feel that you can’t just be defined by your tits, so you stop showing them off for a year or two, making us think she’s like a porn chick who just found a Christian boyfriend, trying to erase her past because she as saved….like a Big Titty Host Body Rum Springer, where the Amish let the kids live in society to decide if the Amish way is for them, or like a UK Gap Year, where the High School grads fuck off in Thailand for a year getting wasted and fucking Lady Boys before strapping down and getting to work, but for Big Titty, which in her case was her time to try to be a legit talent, actor, celebrity, with management to support her internet fame…but OnlyFans and the millions that can be made from it sucked her back in….

We’ve all got a price, and sometimes that helps tits realize they matter and the women with the tits to realize that if they don’t keep using the tits, the freakishly sized tits, they’re basically self sabotaging, self destructive and fucking nuts…

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Posted in:Sophie Mudd

2023

10

May

Weight Watcher Wednesday of the Day

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No Fat Chicks Allowed!

As you know, EVIL is the normalization of fat chicks being hot, from the propaganda the TV, Fake News, internet is pushing because it’s really an easy thing to push on people…

First, they know how to use sounds and images to manipulate our minds, whether using fear tactics, emotional tactics, cyber bully stories to get in our hearts, or just straight up repeating the same messages to us, the media is a trillion or even ZILLION dollar industry and they have specialists who study this shit and tweak and perfect this shit to control our shit….

Second, fat girls are an easy sell to other fat chicks because if they can be rewarded for being fat, why bother not eating all the cake you can, cake is delicious….so everyday a new clinically or legally morbid obese woman is created and she thinks she’s FIERCE and not disgusting.

Third, dudes are perverts and just see tits, if they only know fat chicks, only fuck fat chicks, because like parasites the fatties are taking over, then they’ll just accept any pussy that comes their way, until that fat chick develops and ego and realizes she can take her fatness to the top and the low lives they used to land out of loneliness become regular dudes, or even rich dudes, who could be with non fat chicks but they’ve been propagandized.

As a fat fuck married to a fat fuck fat is bad, never good, always unhealthy and thus gross, not hot, never BODY POSITIVE, because it’s BODY destructive…..DO NOT FALL FOR THE LIES…

That said, here’s some BBW for you perverts for INCLUSIVITY….because we don’t want to be told we’re not DIVERSE enough.

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Posted in:Fatty

2023

09

May

Brie Larson Pantsless of the Day

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I like to think that Brie Larson is celebrity plant that they use to mock us.

She is not hot, even in her slutty selfies, if anything she’s awkward, weird, and makes me feel uncomfortable. So either she’s got dirt on key people that she can manipulate into getting those high paid work projects, maybe someone MeToo-ed her when she was a 16 year old aspiring pop star and she’s threatened to go public, maybe she was invited to some weird sex party and has video of people eating each other’s asses that they don’t want released, I don’t know the details, but I do know that there’s got to be a bigger reason why she exists.

I do not buy any “great actor’ or “great talent” or “great connection with the audience who relates to her”, because she’s really a wet maxi pad in the corner of the truck stop bathroom left by an obese woman who was taking a shit in there before you accidentally entered, thinking it couldn’t be that bad only for it to be worse than you ever imaginged…THE SMELLL…..and not in a “well someone would find that hot kind of way” because we know there are people who would suck that wet maxi pad, bring it home, put it in a jar and nurture it until it rotted so bad the neighbors complained about the smell. We aren’t talking about that guy, we’re talking the average person who would find that gross, unappealing, and trash.

I get she could be a celebrity plant in that they can control what she says, her politics, the woke agendas, all that other shit, but I don’t think anyone’s listening.

Even when she takes pantsless selfies like a basic whore, while being a top billed celeb, it’s like, “Ok, now what”….

I think her filling her pussy up with sharpies like the girls of Reddit, wouldn’t even stop the scroll and she’d manage to make THAT boring too.

I just don’t think there’s hope for her, sure she gets paid, sure she pulled off a scam…but damn…she’s pants less, she works out, she’s rich, she’s famous, yet this sucks so hard….why?

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Posted in:Brie Larson

2023

09

May

Jojo Bra and Panties of the Day

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Funny enough, I went on Jojo’s social media last week for the first time in months, because I don’t really bother with social media, it gets in the way of me being an out of touch, clueless, outdated, boomer fuck….so that I can just perv on people in peace without getting caught up in the cancer of the social media satanic agenda….

But I have to update this bullshit site, so sometimes I do my rounds to see “who is famous, or who was famous, and what slutty content have they posted”….

Jojo, being a top trending child star sold to the industry, tapped out early on, but has been slowly making a comeback, and pre-pandemic, she pulled a full tit out on her IG story, shocking a nation, but not really, few people cared, but I was like “damn Jojo, them New Hampshire, daughter of a cleaning lady tits are some kind of big”….

Then Rihanna cast her as an underwear model for Rihanna’s billion dollar brand, like Rihanna was tapping into the people she looked up to before she was exported to the USA at the age of 14 to become a billion dollar earner for some people….and I guess herself….but that’s another story….this story is about Jojo posting lingerie pics on the regular as part of that Rihanna stamp of approval she needed.

Since then, she’s touring and performing in plays or something along those lines and the panty pics, the titty pics, the Jojo trying to be the pudgy child star turned thirst trapper became few and far between….

BUT ALL THAT HAS CHANGED TODAY….with the underwear selfie….now if only her name wasn’t so fucking stupid, maybe you could jerk off to it, but when someone refers to herself as Jojo, it reminds me of the retard home I was forced to volunteer at….she’s not 4 years old anymore…let her get that grown up name…her tits, which have gone through puberty at least twice, say it’s time.!

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Posted in:JoJo|Jojo Levesque

2023

09

May

Tiny Tits Tuesday of the Day

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In a world filled with fake shit, from the hormones in the water making everyone gay, to the anti-depressants in the water, making everyone a retard, to the chemicals sprayed in the air, to the lies on TV and in the media….to the AI generated women, the deep fake porn, the AR filters of IG and SNAP, the FACETUNE, the fake followers, the fake numbers, the fake fame, these trolls commit to and brands pay for…..be a tiny tit…

In a world full of insecure self hating uninteresting people, who realize their only hope is to have fake tits, because tits help girls get ahead, especially when they have nothing else going for them….all filled with plastic and inflammation….be a tiny tit.

The tiny tit is a wonderful thing, like it’s big tit cousin, it can be played with and sucked on without all the added work, and heavy lifting….and in most cases, the body the tiny tit is on is better than the body the big tit is on, so whether we are all eager for big tit, TINY tit women are better, more secure, not out there murdering their tits to impress idiots on the internet….so we celebrate that!

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Posted in:TINY TITS

2023

09

May

Sara Sampaio Braless of the Day

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Sara Sampaio is one of the more basic Victoria’s Secret models that has existed.

My theory was they they hired her to replace Adriana Lima before realizing that bitch would never quit, but a Portuguese Speaking, Light Eyed girl was all those casting people needed, or she met the right guy on a fishing boat off the coast of Lisbon and her figured he’d give her a career as a model because she was tall enough as a thank you for the great fish her family brought him, like those custard pastries and Nando’s chicken, those Portuguese can fish.

Anyway, she’s the kind of VS model, who is no longer a VS model because VS turned their back on hot chicks…I actually walked by a VS store the other day and they had a fat fuck in their window, like some kind of virtue signalling woke liars….like back in the day the ugly VS models were this girl you wouldn’t notice on the street and now they are the girls you can’t help but notice because they take up the whole sidewalk or all the seats on the bus, thanks to being built like a bus.

What I am trying to say, I’ll get to it, is that Sara Sampaio doing nipple braless titty selfies like some kind of basic whore almost makes her less average looking, even though she’s doing what is now average things! Internet iPhone whorin’.

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Posted in:Sara Sampaio

2023

09

May

Tight Pant Tuesday of the Day

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Tight pants may not be the foundation of romance, but when you see them on randoms in the street, basically exposing their genitals while hugging their asses in ways that their asses are rarely hugged, pulling it all together so that it looks the way an ass should look, or at least in a way they want their ass to look…..it’s basically about as much romance as you can get from strangers on the street.

Yesterday, I saw some girl in tight pants walking towards me, with each step forward a pussy lip winked at me, in my mind, our eyes connected, me and her pussy lip, and are now forever friends….we’ve made love three times in my mind….

Earlier today, I saw some girl walking her dog in tight shorts, she had skinny legs and wide hips, so that when she walked her legs were so far apart that all I saw was the mound of her pussy, just smiling back at me, I wanted to offer it a cigarette but forgot that I quit smoking a decade ago, even though smoking’s so cool.

Basically, tight pants are my only way to find love with stranger pussy, without actually having to talk to the host body of said pussy, so tight pants are my key to happiness.

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Posted in:Tight Pants

2023

09

May

Ashley Tisdale Ugly Watch in a Bra of the Day

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And so….the ugly watch continues….

If you’ve been reading this site since Ashley Tisdale’s first Ugly Watch happened, this was pre botched nose job, almost early on in her career as a one hit wonder on some Disney Bullshit, that no one really understood how she got cast for, seeing as it was called High School Musical and she was already in her mid-30s, but we’ll assume some dick sucking, nose banging against the GOOCH in ways a smaller nosed talent could never pull off, making that nose work miracles for her before self sabotaging when realizing she didn’t need the nose anymore, thanks to being cast by Disney…..

Anyway, we’ve been doing the UGLY watch for over a decade because I’ve always been immune to propaganda and I’ve never believed that a bitch is hot because the TV or the TEEN CHOICE awards pretends she’s hot…you see I have eyes, a penis and a internal gauge for these things….and so do you, just believe in yourself and you won’t fall for the lies…

The skinny, now mom, probably in her mid-40s, looks like she’s done some face work, like she’s some sort of hispanic girl dolled up and ready to illegally cross the border for human trafficking work but her small mom tits, that once had implants that are now explants, even though no one knew they were implants….are in a bikini top and that’s always fun…

Who’s face is that? that’s not even her, I mean I have facial recognition blindness and that ain’t Tisdale though…

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Posted in:Ashley Tisdale|Ashley Tisdale