I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2010

23

Feb

Ronnie Wood’s New Punching Bag of the Day

Ronnie Wood is a Rolling Stone who got in trouble for beating up some teenager hipster he called his girlfriend, who was really just some weird Russian lookin’ import piece of shit he must have met getting high at some bar, who used him for his money, celebrity and great drug hook ups and that he used for her young, used up pussy, that was not as used up as the old used up pussy he is used to….and the whole thing made sense and balanced out the universe because these kinds of relationships happen all the fucking time..and why wouldn’t they because if you were a fucking old rock star you’d want young pussy to make you feel young and if you were young pussy, you’d want someone to buy you all the nice things you want who can also put you on the map and make you famous by association, which is more famous than you’ll ever be on your own….but apparently he chose one who calls the cops despite all you’ve done for her and that’s pretty fucking disappointing….but here he is with some Brazilian Polo coach he’s currently fucking….concluding my post on weathered old abusive rockstars and the young pussy stupid enough to fuck with them.

Trust me, when I started this post out, I expected it to workout a lot better than this…

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Abusive|Rolling Stone|Ronnie Wood

2010

23

Feb

Claudia Schiffer for the Retired Supermodel Pregnancy Fetishists of the Day

Some people have specific needs when it comes to jerking off and getting off. I realized a long time ago that pretty much anything you can think of, no matter how vile, at least one person has got off to it. I like to credit my friend who got off to garbage, because he found the story behind the garbage exhilerating and erotic. The mystery of who the person behind the empty coke can, or the half eaten sandwich, or the dirty kleenex was enough for him to get off….motherfucker would walk around with a garbage bag and gather during the day thanks to umemployment, welfare and insanity, then he’d spread it around his apartment floor and roll around in the shit naked and moaning….so I guess the idea that a percentage of people who used to masturbate to Claudia Schiffer when she was the supermodel who wouldn’t get naked who are also into ready-to-drop porn, that there is a market for and exists, is not that far of a stretch and here are the pictures for that guy.

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Claudia Schiffer|Ready to Drop

2010

23

Feb

Pink Goes for a Jog of the Day

I am a man with a very fat, unhealthy, out of shape wife who sounds like she is drowning everytime she breathes, so for a while, I used to jerk off to women jogging outside my apartment window. My fetish for healthy bithces got so bad that I even got a job volunteering at the local YMCA where all the college kids and prozac suburban moms would work out in their really tight pants that showed off their pussy definition. It was like they were in such tight clothes I could visualize them naked, they were sweaty and I could hardly contain my erection no matter how small it actually is…..but every once in a while, a bitch who got addicted to the workout high would become totally jacked and totally masculine, making me wonder if getting off to them makes me gay, or does the fact that they have a vagina, despite not lookin’ like they should have a vagina cancel it out….The point is that Pink is one of those girls that I think you are gay if you get off to her and really fucking messed up if you get off to her music while crying and masturbating in your bedroom closet so no one catches you….

So this is not celebrity workout fetish cuz you have a fat, lazy wife and this brings you hope pics, this is the test of if you are capable of getting hard for an actual man by putting a bitch as manly as they come in tight clothes up to bat….cuz the truth is that sometimes a vagina isn’t enough.

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:Jogging|Pink

2010

23

Feb

Some Ashlee Simpson Leg in Pantyhose of the Day

Ashlee Simpson was spotted pantsless in public. It can only be assumed that she’s not wearing pants because her husband is a queer and she craves any male attention she can get, figuring that if she’s not wearing pants, people will look at her like they want to fuck her, something she’s not used to since it’s been excuse after excuse after she got pregnant, as Wentz was eager to impregnate her when he was using her as a vessel for his ego to leave a legacy behind in this world, and all that ended once he succeeded because he could go back to fucking boys…..or maybe she’s just airing out he mom pussy cuz since it’s been stretched the fuck out, it gets clammy and uncomfortable when you try to stuff it into woman’s underwear….and what it really comes down to is who the fuck cares and what the fuck do I know about Ashlee Simpson pantless, I just know it’s a hell of a lot better than Pete Wentz pantsless at the gay bar you walked into cuz you didn’t know it was a gay bar and stayed because you really needed a drink.

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Ashlee Simpson|Leg

2010

22

Feb

stepLINKS of the Day

I spent half my day watching some native presentation at the local native community center because I heard there was going to be free booze, when really all that was free was some obscure meat that must have been baby seal because I guess they prefer to give their people free traditional food than white man’s manipulation juice that left them on the streets and signing over free land.

I ate it anyway, because that’s what being fat is all about and I was lucky enough to meet at least two fat inuit prostitutes who offered me affordable sex, they even had business cards and their entrepreneurial marketing know-how made it hard to say no, but their toothless smiles and skin infection didn’t.

Now here are my stepLINKS….

Paris Hilton Looks Good and Ready to Be Date Raped
GO

I Wonder What Else She Can Destroy With Those Thighs? – VIDEO
GO

The 14 Freakiest Serial Killers You’ve Probably Never Heard Of
GO

Happy Birthday! Drew Barrymore’s Hottest Pics
GO

Because It Will Help You Get Through Monday Without Putting a Bullet In Your Head
GO

Sophie Turner Deserves a Good Rogering
GO

Kate Winslet is Lookin Fully Bangable
GO

Yeah, I’d Bang Super Saver Lilian – VIDEO
GO

Catch a Chat Roulette Predator – VIDEO
GO

Peaches Geldof and Her Sloppy, Topless Throwback
GO

Let’s Make Up Some Stuff About Justin Bieber
GO

Now That’s a Perfect Ass
GO

Sasha Volkova is Worth Taking a Look At
GO

Man, It’s About Time Betty White Gets The Respect She Deserves
GO

Now THAT’S What I Call a Self Shot Babe
GO

Find Girls to Fuck – Because Sex is a Two Person Activity
GO

It’s a Cleavage Miracle! – VIDEO
GO

Rihanna and a Midget Stripper – VIDEO
GO

A Topless Katie Downes Will Perk You Up
GO

Hailey and Tiffany Get It On
GO

Use This To Get Sex..Because Sex is Fun
GO

Mila Kunis is Looking good As Always
GO

Rhian Sudgen and a Whole Lot of Air Brushing Make Her the Perfect Blonde
GO

Funny or Die Usually Isn’t That Funny, But Here Is a Funny or Die Video
GO

Lady GaGa and Her Attention Whoredom of the Day
GO

OMG!!! BONER IS MISSING!!!
GO

Fucking Machines X Lesbians = Awww Yeaaah!
GO

Aurelia Gliwski- Victoria’s Secret Lingeri
GO

Once a Slut, Always a Slut
GO

Luisa Takes a Shower
GO

Noni’s Gallery is Something Worth Taking a Look At
GO

A Gallery of 25 Parents That Are Worse Parents Than Me
GO

Guess Agan Shit Stain – VIDEO
GO

The Life and Times of Tim is Pretty Much the Best Show Ever – VIDEO
GO

That Depends On What Your Definition of ‘Drug Free’ Is
GO

Jamie is Nude By the Window
GO

Another Chuck E. Cheese Fight , the Third in a Fucking Week…This Time In St. Louis
GO

I just masturbated to this picture….
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS

2010

22

Feb

Sophie Monk is a Cripple of the Day

Sophie Monk was in car accident, I didn’t know, cuz she doesn’t matter, especially since her big constantly cameltoed no matter how thick her pants are vagina was in an accident too, thanks to her ex-future-husband’s wandering dick that went for a swim in Paris Hilton’s herpe-ridden sewage pipe of a vagina, only to taint Sophie Monk and her big vagina, not that herpes have ever stopped me before, but it’s always nice to remind everyone before they jerk off to her newest festish pics, which are of her bruised up, beat up, near death, crippled body that’s easy to rape cuz it can’t run the fuck away.

Bonus – Here’s about as close as I can get to where her pubic hair should be if she didn’t murder it, like Benji Madden murdered her vagina…I guess it’s nice to see she’s not letting that stop her…

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Cripple|Sophie Monk

2010

22

Feb

Sophie Turner Lookin’ Classy of the Day

Sophie Turner’s people cast some kind of spell on me. I don’t know what PR brainwashing they did but it fucking worked, cuz everytime I see her pictures I feel the need to post about her.

For those of you who don’t know, Sophie Turner is some Australian Lawyer who was on some reality show and who is trying to make it in America. She looks like typical trash stripper and pornstar with fake everything, and I called her out on it, something I am sure everyone has done at least once before, but that she pretended to not like, despite the obvious attempt and effort she’s put into lookin’ this way, so I got a fuckin’ lawsuit threat to take down my comments about her lookin’ like a pornstar….

Either way, I thought the whole thing was a fucking joke, I told them off and wrote about it on the site, and now every time I see her pics of her and her obnoxious whore outfits she wears for attention, I can’t help but post the shit, even if they are boring, cliche and only show a little fake tit cleavage. It’s like they’ve cast some voodoo spell on me, so here I am at it again, Sophie Turner lookin’ like a pornstar but not a pornstar, irrelevant and not exciting, but good enough for me to post, cuz they fucking brainwashed me…..Motherfuckers.

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:cleavage|Sophie Turner|Tits

2010

22

Feb

Jessica Simpson Gets Her Tit Grabbed by a Gay of the Day

Jessica Simspon’s big ol’ sloppy tit is getting accidentally grabbed by her gay hairdresser and I’m sure she appreciates the attention because getting your tit grabbed is one step closer to getting pregnant so that you don’t feel like an Old Maid you are at family functions since your baby sister is a proud parent in a happy marriage, while you can’t even get a motherfucker to fuck you for more than a fucking week…and all you get is a few seconds of accidental male attention that isn’t even into this kind of thing, and who probably threw up after this happened and soaked his hand in purrell to get the titty germs off of him….to forget the whole incident ever happened.

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:Jessica Simpson|Tits

2010

22

Feb

Jennifer Love Hewitt is a Fucking Clown of the Day

It was Jennifer Love Hewitt’s birthday, she turned 31 and I guess no one gave a fuck, so she decided to dress up like an idiot to let the world know she’s celebrating and having the time of her life cuz it’s her day, or maybe it just took her 31 years to realize and accept the fact that she’s an overweight joke by dressing like the clown that she is, but really what the fuck do I know, other than that this costume in February is nothing but fucking stupidity, but the good news is that I never knew something so insignificant, like some bitch I don’t know who I never found hot, even though she was tiny with big tits, cuz I knew eventually her ass would catch up and balance out her horse face, could actually annoy me this much, but now I do…

Pics via PacificCoastNews
Pics via Fame

Posted in:Clown|Jennifer Love Hewitt

2010

22

Feb

Some Bitch from The Saturdays in a See Through Shirt of the Day

Her name is Vanessa White, not to be confused with Vanna White, the Gameshow model who must be in her 90s, and the funny thing is that she’s not even white, that’d be like my name being Rich Classy, or Rock N. Muscles or some other thing that couldn’t be further than the truth, cuz she’s actually Black Filipina, but she is in some contrived, corporate creation called The Saturdays that produce real shit fucking music in the UK that is sung by girls I want to fuck, the way pop music is supposed to be, before trash like Gaga brought the boring lives of Americans everywhere some minor level of excitement with how freaky she was…none of that excitement being sexual excitement….

Either way, here she is in a see thru shirt. Boring? I know.

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:The Saturdays|Vanessa White