I don’t know if the actual cause of this union is short man syndrome. You know like that scene in Debby Does Dallas when her boss dresses up like the football quarterback before fucking the shit out of her because he was too short to actually be on the team when he was in high school, or maybe a better reference would be a Napoleon complex, where motherfucker tries to compensate for his height, by making a lot of money and landing a variety of whores the get back at the tall people who used to call him “shrimp” or make midget jokes about him, or if this is just a case of hiding his homosexuality and figuring if a bitch is a model, that must mean straight people like her and find her sexy, using that as a gauge to determine if a girl is hot to him, since as a fag he doesn’t have that instinct, but knows enough that a tall, blonde is the mold he needs to fit when it comes to pretending a bitch is his wife or maybe he just likes girls who have the same chin as him because they may be his illegitimate kid he doesn’t know about after fuckin’ a groupie 35 years ago. That’s not to say his wife isn’t a scary fucking monster of a woman, but it is to say that it doesn’t really matter…..

What does matter is how funny he looks next to her in these pics and although we are all the same height laying down, the sex must be a hell of a lot funnier than normal person sex, you know with his pretending he’s not gay, trying to fool her by crawling up her leg like a kid in the playground, less scared of playing with her vagina than he is of being outted as a faggot….

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Rod Stewart|Short