I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2009

14

Jul

Some Chastity Bono Pussy for the Weirdos of the Day

If you’re into pussy that’s on it’s last legs, you know pussy that’s about to take it’s final breath, you know when you walk down the hallway of the cancer ward of the hospital and you feel a little quiver in your pants, or when you look at pre-op female to male tranny who you know have serious mental issues just based on the size of their jeans, who insist on growing a dick, because their dad was too busy skiing into trees and their mom was too busy being a whore to give her the love she needed growing up, creating this serious baggage that makes her want to sew her pussy up and grow a fuckin’ dick, or maybe she just realizes that it’s a man’s world and it’s finally time to command respect out of the world, instead of being paid less and objectified for having a set of oddly shaped tits, and figured since she already looked 3/4 of the way dude, it was the logical fuckin’ step, or maybe it’s gotta do with her being tired of the hardships lesbian couples face every time they leave the house holding lesbian hands in their construction boots and flannel shirts eating organic granola bars when people like me point, laugh and throw dick shaped objects at them, because I know they are just uptight rape victims guys don’t even wanna fuck to begin with, and not actual lesbians, cuz actual lesbians don’t exist….

Posted in:Chastity Bono|Pussy

2009

14

Jul

Hayden Panettiere in a Virginal Topless Scene of the Day

People are making a big deal about this new movie called Beth Cooper where Hayden Panettiere was wrongfully cast to be the hot chick in the school, which would really only happen in the North Pole, and toy making school, where midgets and trolls are the norm, not that a place like that actually exists and either does Santa Claus, unless you count the pedophile in the mall with a boner in his red suit loving every second of his minimum wage job.

This is the kind of topless scene that would only get a virgin fan excited, which I guess is convenient since 98% of Hayden Panettiere’s fans are virgins and the ones who aren’t are just victims of being molested who really like the show Heroes.

Posted in:Hayden Panettiere|Topless|Virgins

2009

14

Jul

Holly Madison and Her Garden Gnome Cock of the Day

I am guessing this is not Travelocity’s new ad campaign encouraging safe sex while traveling where instead of fucking the shit out of local pussy/hookers you should find yourself some inanimate object to stick in your ass while jerking off, but I am not too sure what it is, maybe star fucking for a has been Playboy Model/Hefner Contract wife has gone down hill, and the only old famous phallus you can find is found in your neighbor’s trailerpark garden when you are on a drunken desperate search to get back into the limelight, that reminds me of many nights I’ve ended up in random yards, or in bed, hugging random things that I’ve brought home with me, like the night I woke up in the arms of Black Lawn Jockey , covered in puke, or maybe she’s just trying to be funny, either way, at least she’s in lingerie, because as we all know, that’s all she has going for her…and even that is fading…so if you’re a Holly Madison fan, you best enjoy it when you can.

Posted in:Garden Gnome|Holly Madison|Husband

2009

14

Jul

Jessica Simpson Sex Tape with Her Lover of the Day

These are some pictures of Jessica Simpson’s intimate relationship with food. You know when all she needed to feel sensual was an all you can eat buffet. Her animalistic cravings for BBQ meats, fried foods and the dessert cart lead to steamy, sometimes raunchy, often obscene and always hot nights together, until a few months went by and she realized not only could she not fit in her pants but that the world had turned on her after finding out about this lucid affair, forcing her to quit the shit cold turkey and hit the gym, turning a new leaf…one without the lover that still hangs over her head, but is now just a memory of a salacious affair she holds dear to her vagina.

We’ve got some screencaps of a filthy and raw and carnal night she spent with a chocolate bar. I’m excited to see what went down after the blowjob…I’m thinking anal….

Posted in:Jessica Simpson|Sex Tape

2009

14

Jul

Christina Ricci Calls Single and Lookin’ for Storage in Jeans of the Day

Christina Ricci called off her engagement and is being forced to look for storage to keep her stuff in while she takes on this new chapter of her life being a single girl in a big world, who is not nearly as hot as she used to be, but at least has money and celebrity status that is enough for desperate dudes who used to jerk off to her fat tits before she murdered them, willing to explore the depths of her pussy.

The funny thing about these pictures is that the sign next to her head is also the same message that was written in the first valentine’s day card she ever got, only it read:

Thank your Vagina for BEING public storage for all of our dicks. We appreciate your effort.

And it was sent by the group of dudes she was fucking. True story. Something I predict will happen again now that she’s single and is going to go all crazy as all girls do.

Another true story. I used to have a crush on her when she was in the Addams Family, but that’s just because she was at her fresh-faced hottest…

Fine that wasn’t a true story, she was only 11 and it was meant to be a joke that none of you got because you aren’t even reading this….thanks for the support, here are the pics….

Posted in:Christina Ricci|Single

2009

14

Jul

Gay Amputee Singing Mariah Carey’s Obsessed of the Day

I am all for disabilities, if anything being a gay amputee would be an asset in the gay world. Mainly because gays will bang anything they can get their dicks inside and really all homie needs is an asshole and he’s good to fuckin’ go. But also because gays are always into freakish fetish shit, from wearing assless pants in public to other shit sexual deviants hustle, because if they wanted Disney sex they’d be straight, married and have kids. They wouldn’t be jacked on coke, poppers, MDMA, Viagra and GHB at 7 am Saturday morning in a bath house fuckin’ and getting fucked by 12 dudes they don’t know…

I am not for fans singing along to their favorite song badly. Shit’s a pet peeve of mine. So homie should keep this act for Gay Karaoke and keep it off the internet, mainly because people are just going to pass this shit around laughing at the poor motherfucker who’s already been wronged by God and doesn’t need to draw more attention to himself, but also because he’s no good. Enjoy.

Posted in:Gay Amputee|Mariah Carey

2009

14

Jul

stepLINKS of the Day

Today’s been pretty shitty. My ear exploded at a concert 2 weeks ago and still hurts and makes me dizzy. So walking down the street is funny cuz I look drunk but shitty cuz when I get drunk it gets worse and I end up falling and hurting myself more. It also burns when I pee. Not too sure what’s up with that and I may or may not have had a mild heart attack twice today. But I guess that’s life, at least my life and I won’t bother killing myself, even though I probably should. I will however post these links and drink me some more drink, cuz that’s the only thing that I look forward to in a day and that sounds way more depressing than it is.

Here you go..

Jessica Simpson and Her Big Tits Are Single Again
GO

Megan Fox See Thru
GO

Lily Allen is See Through and Has a Camel Toe
GO

More From Auto Tune the News
GO

Slutty Model Pics Of The Day: Ariel Meredith
GO

Your Business Cards Suck
GO

And More From Lohans Twitter
GO

Find Girls to Fuck – Because Sex is a Two Person Activity
GO

Cartman Wants You To Suck His Balls
GO

Bikini Amazon Godess? Hmmmmm…
GO

striptease of the Day
GO

Those Homo Pengeuins at the SF Zoon Broke Up
GO

Eva LongWHOREiaz Likes to be Tied Up
GO

And More Michael Jackson Rumoes
GO

Opens Wide, Leighton Meester
GO

Kacey is Sexy All Over
GO

Jon Gosselin’s New Whore Likes to Soke the Good Shit
GO

Some Sluts Hang Out On Entourage
GO

Wino is Back in England, I Wonder Hot Long Before She’s Back On Junk
GO

Danielle Lloyd Dons Lingerie Again
GO

Bachelorette Party Fun with a Female Stripper
GO

Who Cares About Her Bar Trick, Check Out Her Tits
GO

Mother Daughter Pussy Flash
GO

Frankie HAs Multiple Orgasms
GO

Use This To Get Sex..Because Sex is Fun
GO

Summer Skirts From Russia
GO

Get Ready For The Biggest Piece of Shit Clothing Line Ever
GO

Samurai Cop Awesomeness
GO

Who’s Amanda Hardington? I Don’t Know, But She’s in a Bikini
GO

Red Head Arial Takes It Outdoor
GO

Amy Reid is Kinky
GO

Emma Watson Gets Hotter By the Day
GO

When Asians Do Christopher Walken Movies
GO

Peach in a Field of Dreams
GO

Scarlett Johansson Mango Photo Shoot
GO

Baby Korean B-Boy
GO

Sex Ed Videos
GO

Rumoe Willis is a Punky Lesbian…or Something
GO

Nicole Pietrontone Crowned Miss COED
GO

Oxana on the Beach
GO

Someone At Dairy Queen Should Have Thought This Through
GO

Sexiest Female Celebs Smokin’ Cigars
GO

Wrestling babe Christy Hemme is fuckin’ hot!
GO
 

Posted in:stepLINKS

2009

13

Jul

Jessica Alba Shows a Little Bra of the Day

Jessica Alba was out showing a little bra to remind us all that despite having a kid that murdered her sex appeal, vagina and naked body and left shit in a bloody pile in the corner, she’s still alive and kickin’ and by kickin’ I mean boring as fucking shit…not that shit can’t be exciting depending on the day, but Jessica Alba can’t, she’s too uptight and even pictures of the cunt being wild aren’t even PG, I heard it’s gotta do with the no-nudity clause in her boring contract, unless it’s to trick dudes to not leave you by getting pregnant.

Posted in:Bra|Jessica Alba

2009

13

Jul

Tila Tequila’s Ustream Insanity Nipple Slip Strip of the Day

I can’t follow Tila Tequila on twitter anymore. It’s just too fucking desperate to see her trying to get male attention or fame or whatever the fuck it is she’s looking for and her tweets just annoy me. I am all for girls trying to suck dick to get to the top, I am all for girls with serious daddy issues, who are willing to get naked and compromise any self respect they may have possibly had, but I hate having to watch it unfold all day long on the internet makes me feel like I am part of her insane, cheesy, stripper, clubkid, loser life and that’s just not working for me.

What is working for me is that she doesn’t deny being a whore and gives her fans what they want. No matter how desperate it seems, at least it’s authentic slutty behavior.

Here’s a video of her nipple slip and erotic dance cuz she’s an exhibitionist, this is what her life is all about and people are willing to watch as long as she’s willing to keep up the slutty since she’s got a lot of time on her hands, I just don’t know why she hasn’t got fucked on camera yet, maybe it is because all of this is a fuckin lie.

Posted in:Tila Tequila|Ustream

2009

13

Jul

30th Annual Mooning of the Trains Event of the Day

Not only is there is an annual train mooning event, but it’s been going on for 30 fuckin’ years. Sure the turnout is almost as pathetic as one of my birthday parties, because I have no friends, and the people who do show up are just homeless lookin’ motherfuckers who have nothing better to do with their days, and I’m sure no one is really making huge bank off this shit, like it’s no fuckin’ Woodstock 1997, but the fact that it happens is pretty fucking amazing and is inspiring me to start up a useless festival of my own called “Annual Riding Drunkenstepfather’s Face Like It was the Bus” festival, but I figure the quality of pussy willing to allow that kind of thing to happen to them will make me envious of the Train Mooning event’s turnout, which isn’t saying much other than that I am a loser.

Posted in:30th annual|mooning trains