I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2008

05

Dec

Paris Hilton Almost Died of the Day

Well unfortunately she didn’t die or almost die, but she is a rich kid and the kind of person who doesn’t leave the hosue for a week if she’s got a pimple. Unfortunately for the guys who have got herpes from her, she doesn’t take the same approach to pimples in her panties, but that’s just because the world doesn’t stare at them when in her party dress. What happened was she made a Grandiose Spoiled Cunt Who Thinks She’s Royalty exit from a club, as she does, without realizing she was walking into a brawl and she ended up getting pushed as some dude went nuts on a paparazzi, throwing punches because I assume he got sent an invoice for 50,000 dollars for posting their pictures like I did. Or maybe he got mad because the paparazzi got footage of him cheating on his girlfriend, like some guy who tried to fight me a few years ago while I was walking down the street video taping people and stopping on the slut he was with’s fake tits. Dude grabbed me by the throat, his group of 8 guys and 8 hookers circled around me and tried to break my camera, but we agreed to just delete the video because I wasn’t in the mood to get beat the fuck up by crazy guys I could tell like UFC who were drunk and jacked on coke and they weren’t in the mood to be made internet famous for their wives to figure out what the boys to when they go to Montreal for the weekend. The good news is that the video I deleted wasn’t even worth jerking off to so I guess I won in the end, at least that’s what I tell myself….as for Paris Hilton, it’s pretty unfortunate this wasn’t a gun fight and she just happened to get JFKed, not because I hate her, because I really don’t give a fuck, but because she’s pretty much better off dead.

Posted in:Fight|Paris Hilton

2008

05

Dec

Foxy Brown’s Tits Fall Out of Her Corset of the Day

Fatty Foxy Brown was performing in Sacramento, I didn’t realize she was still around, but by the looks of it, it looks like she’s twice as big as she used to be. This video is of her tits falling out of a corset that she should consider replacing, or punishing for not doing its job properly, since despite it’s firm grip, still make her look like she’s lost the war with food, but apparently her tits fall out of it, so maybe ill-fitting clothes aren’t the end of the world, if you like seeing fat black tits floppin’ all over the fuckin’ place like they are ready to feed their 8 babies, or some shit. I can’t really make out her nipples, because it’s dark in there and I can barely make her out in the video, but I do see a whole lot of titty jiggle and when horny enough, you take what you can get.

Posted in:Foxy Brown|Tit Slip

2008

05

Dec

Passive Aggressive Sex Rejection of the Day

I will tell you why this long drawn out video none of you will watch is funny and that is because of the back story I can pretty much guarantee behind this and that is that dude meets a girl and builds up the courage to invite her out on a date, she agrees because she’s not all that hot or used to boys taking the traditional route of trying to wine and dine her. So he puts on his favorite blazer and she dresses up as classy as she can and they go out to a restaurant for a bite to eat. He orders a bottle of wine and tries to get her drunk thinking it’ll make the fuck easier to secure, but doesn’t realize she’s running all these different ways to get out of the awkward moment that’s bound to come where he tries to get in her pants, so she does what any passive aggressive girl who is unsure of herself and scared to offend or rub the guy the wrong way after he so kindly tried his best to fuck her. So she fakes that she’s sick and can’t walk and dude tries to play nice about the whole thing, knowing she only had one glass of wine but still unable to accept that she won’t fuck his lame ass, so he holds her hair, feels her tit a bit all while she sits there about to be sick, but never actually getting sick, because she’s not sick and it’s all just part of her master fucking plan to not give up her vagina despite how badly she probably needs it. To make things worse, bitch is so prude that no only will she not let herself get fucked but she doesn’t know that real drunk people about to be sick is a lot messier than this, with a lot more spitting and dizziness and a lot less put together. Good job though, maybe you can take your acting to The Hills or some shit…..Either way, watch the video because I thought it was funny and it’s my site so I can post what I want to, even if it is shitty original content….

Posted in:Passive Aggressive|Rejection|Sex|stepTV

2008

05

Dec

Jimmy Kimmel Kills Old People of the Day

I saw this clip yesterday and thought it was funny, not because it is Jimmy KImmel, let me say that again, this is not funny because of Kimmel, what is funny is that some woman died watching his show and he tries to blame the Jonas Brothers for it, because they were on the show around the time she died, and because it’s easy to blame the virgins, but we all know that the Jonas Brothers had nothing to do with it, and the fact that Jimmy Kimmel has a show does. We know she sat there trying to figured out how the fuck a guy like that gets his own show and figured it was time to step out of the party that was her 88 year old life. It’s one of those, thanks for the good times world, but it’s time to finish my drink, put my jacket on and walk the fuck away from the shit show this party has become, like the time I went to a friend’s birthday and all the girls left by midnight and the dudes started wrestling each other and furniture topless, so I stole the beer and snuck out, only in this case, bitch won’t be heading to the strip club to de-gay herself, but instead she’s 6 feet under. Point of the story is that I am surprised she wasn’t watching Carson Daly when she died, because he’s even worst than Kimmel….

Posted in:Jimmy Kimmel|Murderer

2008

05

Dec

stepLINKS of the Day

I got fan mail….

Jesus,

I just felt the need to write a short e-mail to tell you how fabulous I think your website is. It is the perfect combination of useless information and perversion. I am a young mom of three children with a hell of alot of time on my hands when they are at school. So, just thank you for providing me with a great way to waste my time. Sure I could be cleaning or cooking or some other boring domestic chore. Instead I check your website everyday and it makes me supremely happy. Might I be slightly disturbed? Probably…..but I think everyone who reads your blog must be.
 
Anyway have a spectacular day!

Three kids? Woman you got to learn how to keep those legs shut and if you insist on getting slammed, make the fucker pull the fuck out. It is never too late to take them on a trip to Asia and accidentally lose them at an airport, then we will have all the time to be together via the internet. Think about it and while you do, check out these links, I chose them all for you….I may just flirting with you because I know you put out…but really, what difference does it make. God, I hope you’re still lactating….Okay….enough of this….thanks for reading, Now LINKS………

Some Big Man on a Little Horse
GO

Marilyn Manson’s New Pussy and She Looks As Thrill as Her Hatred For Life Allows
GO

Isla Fisher is Looking Good in FHM
GO

Amy and Blake Say Goodbye the Only Way They Know How…And Complaints of a Horrible Smell of Death in their Neighborhood Tripled
GO

Hillary Duff And Her Nipples ARe Christmas Shopping
GO

All the Zoo GIrls in Film
GO

Paris Really Lost Out in the Best Friend Department If You Ask Me
GO

The Pussycat Dolls Want You To Buy Their Panties
GO

Alexis Capri Takes My Breath Away
GO

Computer Friends Are For Losers Like You
GO

Find The Best Porn on the Internet According to Me
GO

Well I’m Glad Sex Education is Doing Some Good For The Kids Today
GO

Japanese Spanking Torture Game Show
GO

I Want to Fuck Eva Mendes So Bad It Makes My Flacid Penis Hurt
GO

Somehow Paris Hilton + Disney Seems Like Complete Disaster
GO

Here’s a Pretty Hot Cake
GO

Skate Tokyo
GO

Madonna Photoshopped To Shit And Showing Her Flexibility for Luis Vuitton
GO

May I Have This Dance?
GO

Tree Climb Fail
GO

Sluts You Know You Can Count
GO

Best Wal-Mart Prank Ever
GO

Bear Attacks Women
GO

Find Girls to Fuck – Because Sex is a Two Person Activity
GO

Jenny Haze Wants To Show You Here Moves
GO

A-Rod is Already Cheating on Madonna
GO

Victoria Looks Like a Dude
GO

Striptease of the Day
GO

Sean Avery Makes Aplogies NotBecause He Is Sorry But Because His Contract is at Stake
GO

Susie and Rosie Want to Wish You a Merry Christmas
GO

Ice Sculpture Fail
GO

Jaime Hammer Wants You To Nail Her
GO

More Pussy Cat Dolls
GO

Use This To Get Sex..Because Sex is Fun
GO

Cali logan Wants You To Meet Her Friend
GO

How About Some Sexy Panties
GO

Girls With Pigtails Make Me Smile
GO

Mariah Carey is Losing It
GO

Happy Birthday Rio
GO

survivor is the Dumbest Show Ever
GO

Riley is a Myspace
GO

Win at Tic Tac Toe Everytime
GO

True Love Defined
GO

Nicole Richie Throwback Skinny Ass in a Bikini
GO

Heidi Montag is Dressed Like a Animal At the Zoo
GO

Kate Bosworth’s Legs
GO

Inked TIts Gallery
GO

An Indian Actress Topless on the Beach With Her Boyfriend
GO

Lesbian To Better Her Career Anne Heche is Knocked Up and It’s A Lot Better than Playing WIth Ellen’s Pussy
GO

Some Fatty Shows Off Her Animal Bra
GO

Some Parkour Fail
GO

The Inner Demon in This Slut Scares Me….
GO

ROGUE COLLECTOR’S PHOTOBUCKET FINDS

Some Old Chick Gets Sexy…
GO

Some Dude’s Collection of Sluts….
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS

2008

04

Dec

Kourtney Kardashian is a Horrible Christmas Present of the Day

So Kourtney Kardashian got into the Christmas spirit 3 weeks early and dressed up like some kind of luxurious wrapping paper you see in the window displays of the luxury boutiques in the big city. Unfortunately, Kourtney Kardashian’s last boyfriend told me that she’s a lot less of a gift and more of a part time job because she’s needy as fuck like most rich brats who always got what they wanted growing up because their dad who was too busy for them hired a staff and issued an expense account to use to shut them up because he didn’t want to deal with them.

The good news, is that like her sister, her vagina seems all about eating all things black. Sure, it may have started with these leggings, but I guess you gotta take babysteps before fully jumping into sex with a black dude, you know especially since her ass isn’t quite fat enough, but by the looks of it, it’s getting there.

Posted in:Cameltoe|Kourtney Kardashian

2008

04

Dec

Lauren Conrad Does the Lohan of the Day

If you know anything about young girls in Hollywood, you know that when they are wasted, they always leave the club with their head aimed to the ground and their hair in their face. I guess it’s because no matter how fucked up their insecure selves are, they always manage to remember to never let a paparazzi get a shot of their face, because when a girl is drunk, she ususally isn’t lookin her best. Which is weird because young girls in Hollywood never seem to remember to use condoms when they are drunk, which I guess is good news for the manufacturers of the Valtrex and the morning after pill,

Unfortunately, the drunk girls I know are a little more embarrassing than their Hollywood counterparts. You know, if they aren’t passed out in the fucking corner letting me finger bang them because they don’t know I am finger banging them, but technically, I’m not violating them, since they never say no and we all know that if they don’t say no then they aren’t totally against what you’re doing to them, then their causing scenes, screaming at bouncers or random people, pissing on the side of the street, or desperately trying to get their fat asses fucked by any guy willing to take them home and when their puke covered dresses get ignored, they end up crying and hating themselves more than they did before they started drinking.

Either way, it’s not news that Lauren Conrad likes to drink, I mean if you were here, you probably would be medicated too, it’s pretty much the only way you could live with yourself for being a lying joke of a celebrity and I call this drunken celebrity dance The Lohan.

Posted in:Drunk|Lauren Conrad|Lohan

2008

04

Dec

Anna Kournikova Stayin Fit of the Day

Today I learned that some thigns never change. First I discovered that Anna Kournikova, a moused faced tennis pro everyone wanted to fuck years ago stays skinny and fit even though she probably doesn’t have to and then I discovered that small dogs still seem to be a gay man magnet because the last 3 times I’ve walked my wife’s dog today, I’ve had at least one gay dude serenade me with questions about the dog, leading to them complimenting my eyes or my broad stature or some sexual innuendos I pretend I don’t quite grasp but know what they are getting at because they assume I’m a poofter too, proving that gay people will fuck anything that dresses in pants and small dogs haven’t lived down the stereotype that comes with them. Unfortunately, I still look too creepy and straight to have hot unsuspecting girls fall for the same homo trick, you know the one where you play gay to gain their trust then switch out on them when they are drunk claiming their pussy is the first pussy you’ve ever wanted to lick for hours on end.

For the record, I didn’t go through with the back alley dog walking blowjob, even though I probably should of, I hear it takes someone who owns a dick to really know how to work a dick….but then again I was told that by a sexual deviant fag trying to lure me into the dark side. Ok, enough of this story. Here’s Anna Kournikova’s tight body……

Posted in:Anna Kournikova|Fit

2008

04

Dec

Heidi Montag’s Staged Bikini Pictures on Her Staged Honeymoon for a Staged Marriage of the Day

Heidi Montag and her boyfriend got fake married for their show, they then went on a fake honeymoon to celebrate their fake marriage for the show and here are the staged pictures of them on the beach because the paparazzi just happened to be there and weren’t hired by the show. Now I am all for fucking with the public if they are stupid enough to buy into it, I mean it’s the foundation of government and religion and most of healthcare, pharmaceuticals and corporations, so I haven’t got a problem with these two clowns stuntin’ like this. I mean sure she sold her soul to MTV for a payout much higher than working some Colorado Ski Restort’s ticket booth for minimum wage and I’m sure you all would do the same fucking thing, because it’s a winning lottery ticket that only costs your dignity and privacy for a couple of years, because proven by how bad and obvious these bikini pics turned out, there’s no fucking chance she’ll be going onto more acting work. So despite The Hills and everything about it being contrived, scripted horse shit, that plays out worse than a Soap Opera, there is no way this Montag is going to use it as a stepping stone to get to the Academy Awards like she was Hilary Swank and this was The Next Karate Kid or some shit, yeah, I know Hilary Swank’s career, Fuck you.

Posted in:Bikini|Heidi Montag|Staged

2008

04

Dec

Chelsy Davy’s Personal Bikini Pictures Exclusive of the Day

I don’t expect you to know who Chelsy Davy is because she’s dating Prince Harry and has been for 4 years and you’re not quite classy enough to keep track of the Royal Family, not that I am classy enough to know who Chelsy Davy is, because I don’t keep track of the Royal Family, unless you consider me collecting change on the street corner keeping track of the Queen, because her face is on all Canadian money, and I have jerked off to her at least once when material was scarce and all I had on me was a quarter and my imagination, but that doesn’t matter.

The truth is that I am not classy enough to do much, just last week I got kicked out of a McDonald’s. It was at 3 am, I was drunk and they rudely woke me up while I was peacifully napping on the bathroom floor with my pants pulled down and the stall door left open, so this high society shit is pretty much beyond me, but I do know that this girl’s got some pretty solid tits, sure if I was a Prince, I’d be pullin’ substantially better ass than this, not that it would be that hard, considering I’m not a Prince and have landed better ass than this, she was easy and hated herself so it wasn’t that challenging, but more a right time, right place situation that gave me hope of a better tomorrow. True story.

Here are those personal pics of the Prince’s future wife.

Posted in:Bikini|Chelsy Davy|Tits