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Jenna Ortega for the Beetlejuice Photocall of the Day

Kelly Brook From Big Titty Model to Big Back Model of the Day

Charli XCX for Demon Kim Kardashian’s Brand of the Day

Christina Aguilera and her Botox Face and Ozempic Body Get Slutty of the Day

Shannon Mcmullen is the Instagram Of The Day

2008

Oct

Halle Berry is Stalking Me of the Day

16 Comments »

Like all smart Americans, Halle Berry is setting up shop in Canada in the event Obama loses the election at least that’s what I think she’s doing.

She recently bought a house that is less than 1 hour away from me, because her pretty boy baby daddy model is from this shitty city I live in and I guess he’s getting homesick and wants his mommy and daddy involved in the upbringing of his million dollar lottery ticket and Halle Berry is committed to making her baby daddy happy, or some shit, because she just doesn’t want to be another statistic, you know single black parent in the ghetto that is Beverly Hills or Malibu or wherever the fuck they live.

I like the pretend that Esquire’s most beautiful girl of 2008 (not 1999 as you would assume) is moving her to be closer to me, but it’s fair to say she doesn’t think I exist, and the truth is I don’t really care that she exists. Sure, she’s hot for a black chick and all, but there’s lots of hot girls in the world, especially when you have no fucking standards, so who needs her.

The only good that can come from this is when I feel like making a million dollars by being a paparazzi and dropping in on them randomly when they are sleeping but I am too lazy or that and because I have a feeling she won’t be using the house at all, she just got it to shut her pretty boy up.

ST. HIPPOLYTE, QUE. – A small town in the Laurentians just got a little more beautiful. Oscar-winning actress Halle Berry and her Montreal partner, model Gabriel Aubry, have bought a house in St. Hippolyte, Que.

The million-dollar home, which the Hollywood star and her boyfriend reportedly bought several weeks ago, sits on 63 acres of land overlooking Molson Lake.’

Aubry, who is the father of Berry’s daughter, grew up near Montreal and his parents still live in the suburb of Laval.

“It feels great, Aubry said “Anything we can do in our own hometown is always a good feeling.”

Source

The big coincidence is I was actually bidding on this property and she swept it from under my nose, when my offer of 14 dollars in quarters was rejected, so now I have reason to really hate her, instead of that whole hate her cuz she doesn’t answer my phone calls bullshit, but here’s the listing, if you care…

Surrounded by sixty-eight acres of privacy and seclusion, this country property features a five acre private spring fed lake and a three bedroom 2,500 sq. ft modern architectural home with various beautiful and original features. This gated estate is less than one hour from Montreal and is accessible by private road. Property has deeded access to Lac Ã Lâ€™Achigan which is less than one kilometer away. For those seeking complete privacy and security this site has it all !

Unique Amenities

Mountain View
Water View
Private Lake
Waterfront

Lac Molson
$1,850,555 (1,850,000 CAD)
Saint-Hippolyte, Quebec, Canada
Estate
Single Family Home
Bedrooms: 3
Bathrooms: 1
Size: 2500 sq ft

Here is the house…

Here is a map of the area….if you want to really get to know her….by sneaking on the property late at night when she’s sleeping…

I expect to be invited to the sex parties….I don’t expect that to happen…But I figured I’d just throw it out there….or maybe plot a way to make it happen…but I am not very good at organizing things, and who really wants to see a tired mother who has spent the last 6 months in yoga in attempts to rejuvenate her vagina, at a sex party….

Here’s the Halle Berry Esquire shoot, where Esquire editors had some kind of relapse and thought that it was 1999 and named her the most beautiful girl in the world, a title, I’ve been using to get in girls pants the last 30 years, but it never seems to work out.

Here she is leaving Yoga over a month ago, because I like to stay current….and she likes the idea of her vagina snappin’ back to it’s original shape and tightness….

Here’s a really old one of her wearinga see through shirt while pregnant with pretty boy’s baby….because she’s slutty like that….

And for those of you who don’t care about real estate, here she is in Monster Ball, a pretty good sex scene, except for the whole Billy Bob Thorton part……
GO

Posted in:Canada|Halle Berry|Stalking

2008

Oct

stepLINKS of the Day

2 Comments »

My wife’s dog pisses a fucking lot. My wife can’t bend over to clean it and I don’t like the smell of piss, unless I am drunk and I’m sniffing a whore’s dirty panties, and even then it’s not my favorite, I just do it because I am a sick fucking man, so today has been filled with cleaning piss and shit I wasn’t piss or shit cleaning, I was getting licked by a dog or being barked at by a dog, and the sad truth is that I’d take my wife’s puppy over my wife, any fucking day. It is almost midnight and I am not drunk enough, yet, but in a few hours I intend to be and when I am, I will be hopefully pissing on my wife while she is asleep and blaming it on the dog. We’ll see if I get there or not…..and while I’m doing that, you can check my links….

John McCain Says Cunt on TV while at some Appearance…
GO

And You Thought the Dramatic Gopher Was Good
GO

I Wanna Bang Aunt Becky’s Tits…
GO

Giselle Bundchen is Topless is Some Magazine I Don’t Care to Know The Name Of Because She is Topless and that is Disgusting….
GO

We May Have Our Differences, but Jesus Will Be Your Friend No Matter What
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Anne Hathaway’s Ex is Business Baby, All Business and he Fucked Her Ass
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Vanessa Minnillo See Through Throw Back
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Briana Banks Will Help Get You Through the Week
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Would Sarah Palin Bang You?
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Okay This is Gonna Sound Kinf of Homo, But I Like Blind Items
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Uhhh Here is the Scariest PSA I Have Ever Seen in My Life
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Reporter: “Do You Go Down a Lot?”
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Miss Louisianna Loses Her Crown And Not Because of Teen Pregnancy For a Change
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I’m Sorry, But Crazy Britney is > Comeback Britney
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stepTV Throwback of the Day
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Find a Girl to Fuck Because, Well, Why Not?
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Milla Jovovich Drops the Eff Bomb
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Maggie Malone Rocks Out and Strips Down
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Nude is Nature
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No More Miley Cyrus Partial Nudes
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Guy Ritchie Moves Fast and I Dont Blame Him
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30 Rock Season 3 Previews Because Tina Fey is Amazing
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Striptease of the Day
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Chimp Rides a Segway
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NEVER EVER DO THIS
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I Wanna Punch This Lady GaGa Bitch in the Face
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Nasty Office Romance
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Some Gossip Girl Star has AIDS
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Scare the Shit Out of Kids This Halloween
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Get Laid With This…
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This Woman Has the Biggest Boobs in England…
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Doctors Laugh When a Giant Dildo is Removed from Someone’s Ass
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Nerd Fight!!!!
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Rosie Huntington Looks Like the Kind of Innocent Girl You Want to Turn Bad
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Topless Sky Diving!
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Sandy Westgate in the Locker Room
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The Republican National Committee Spent over 150K to Clothe Sarah Palin and Her Family
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123456 PokÃ©mon!!
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Jennifer Tilly’s Cleavage Always Brings a Smile to My Face
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Mac Versus PC Bloodbath
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International Babe of the Day
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Cheat on Your Exams
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Miley Cyrus Wears a Grany Swimsuit
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Boob Flash Sneak Attack
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ROGUE COLLECTOR’S PHOTOBUCKET FINDS….

Some Girl Showin her Naked Body….
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This Girl and Her Metal Encrusted Pussy
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Forget About Real Life, Watch Porn
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If You Think Your Neighborhood Whores Are Freaking, You Ain’t Seen Nothing Yet
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS

2008

Oct

Lauren Conrad Shows Off her Legs of the Day

3 Comments »

People say Lauren Conrad is useless, and I say that’s bullshit, her show is useless, there’s no doubt about that, butaccording to these pictures she’s got a decent set of legs, both feet, both arms and both hands. I mean I’ve met amputees and they don’t really give a very good handjob, if you know what I mean…..

She’s also got a mouth, tits, an ass and a pussy. Making her as useful as any girl can possibly get. So stop hating on her, while I stop posting on the site, because this post was a fucking travesty and I think I’m better suited to go out drinking because I need new material and it is Wednesday night afterall….

Posted in:Lauren Conrad|Legs

2008

Oct

Pink Shows Off The Little Cleavage She’s Got of the Day

2 Comments »

Pink wore some tank top that reminds me of some wartime fantasies I once had, of a war that took place before women were allowed in on the site, where I am a hero soldier and being forced to fuck the most feminine of the group with the other soldiers because we’ve been lost in the jungle for the last 8 weeks and horny as fuck. I actually never had that fantasy, but saying she looks like a dude and talking about her ripped pecs is pretty much useless conversation. It’s like calling McCain Old, Lohan a slut, Paris Hilton a herpes ridden whore, Obama a terrorist, the cast of The Hills useless, DJ AM a Bar Mitzvah DJ, shit’s been done and I guess that’s why lookin’ at these pictures of her don’t really warrant a post, but I figure it’s key to give some of the dudes who are on the fence about being homos something to get off to, without having to jerk off to pictures of dudes, because once you’ve reached that point, there’s pretty much no denying you’re a gay…..not that anyone straight or gay could actually get off to Pink and her little tits, but I got nothing better going on right now so deal with it.

Posted in:cleavage|Pink

2008

Oct

Brooke Burke’s Padded Bra and Broken Foot for Dancing With the Stars of the Day

8 Comments »

Here’s Brooke Burke at Dancing with the Stars, or what I like to call, ex celebrities trying to get some more exposure because they have less money in their bank accounts than Anne Heche, walking around with a food injury in some kind of slutted up 1950’s cheerleader outfit for one of her dances you’ve probably already seen.

These pictures of her tight body may not be as hot as watching the 68 year old woman across the street masturbating at night when she’s done watering her plants and forgets to her blinds while wearing a similar get-up from one of her glory days, I mean without a TV or an interest in reading, I don’t get the luxury of seeing Brooke Burke in her padded bra and I’m left with few options to entertain myself.

So if you’re down with seeing girls in costumes get hurt, or already hurt, these are for you. I figure if it saves a husbad from pushing his wife down the stairs to get off because he gets his fix here, it’s worth promoting….

Here’s some dude’s creepy video of her getting injured, performing, I am guessing he’s one of those fans that is so much of a fan, shit is borderline criminal…

Posted in:1950s|Brooke Burke|Injured|Padded Bra

2008

Oct

Jodie Marsh and Her Whip Cream Nose of the Day

5 Comments »

Having married a woman with an eating disorder and not the good kind that leaves you skinny and convulsing due to emaciation, I have no interest in food representing sex. After seeing someone dive into a pint of ice cream or a can of whip cream, or eat an entire cake in severe desperation and frenzy, you know, trying to get it all the fuck in in as little time possible, I just can’t block that out and appreciate a hot 20 year old girl with a little ice cream down her chin, or a girl at starbucks acting silly with whip cream. I like to keep my porn, my fetishes and eating separate.

So seeing Jodie Marsh trying to be sexy with Starbucks whip cream at some promotional event may be worth something to you but I just see a waste of tits, and it’s pretty much as exciting to me as seeing a group of old ladies talking about their grandkids over hot chocolate, where the one with Alzheimers forgets hot to drink and ends up covered in white frothy goodness, which could be hot if you think about the other things she’ll forget, like you raping her, provided you’re an any pussy’s good pussy kind of guy, which I am as long as it hasn’t hit it’s expiration date of 60.

The other thing that’s not hot is that even if you can see past the whole hang-up I’ve got about food and sex, and can imagine yourself cumming on her face and having her make these kinds of faces because of you, you gotta remember that girls who act like they are sluts are generally the worst in bed, so despite popular belief, the only place Jodie Marsh lets dudes cum is in the fuckin’ condom if their lucky, or on themselves after jerking off in the bathroom after she cocked teased them all night, but won’t let them inside her, because she thinks she’s too good for that and because she doesn’t want it biting into her time doing absolutely nothing, but managing to be richer than all of us.

Posted in:Uncategorized

2008

Oct

Selma Blair Trying to be Trash of the Day

5 Comments »

Selma Blair plays some trashy celebrity obsessed girl on some new TV show, that is really a rip off of a successful show in Australia, but as America does, decided to take it as their own, and make their interpretation of it available on TVs everywhere. I am not entirely sure if it has dropped or not and I am not going to find out because I am tired, lazy and have other things to do, but I do know that I have never seen it.

Not only is it a stretch that Selma Blair plays some young girl, considering she’s pushing 40, but to assume that she is trash while taking breaks to eat whatever the fuck she’s eating, that looks expensive, proves she’s nothing but a rich cunt mocking my people and I find that offensive.

Another thing I find offensive is when I was waiiting in line to get my wife a sandwich today, the girl in front of me, who had to be 14 years old, when asked if she wanted the six or twelve inch sub, said that they should make them 9 inches, because that’s the perfect sign, pretty much letting us all know that she’s had 9 inch dick before she even got her period. I guess I could be overanalyzing, maybe it was a reference to her hunger level, you know, 6 being too small and 12 being too big, but if you saw the slutty school girl outfit she was wearing, you’d know that by the time she does get her period, she’ll be pregnant, because up until now, letting guys cum in her hasn’t really been a big deal but has become something she’s used to. I predict many abortions for this girl, just like I predict Selma Blair’s had her own share of abortions, which I guess is normal, if you’re not a republican and have spent the last 10 years getting high and getting fucked because work has been pretty limited and I guess what it all comes down to, is who really gives a shit, this is Selma fucking Blair, my mailman has more fans than she does and all he does is drop bills off for people all day…..

Posted in:Selma Blair|Trash

2008

Oct

Diddy is an Asshole of the Day

8 Comments »

In keeping shit black for my one and only Black Wednesday since starting the site, that will probably end afer this post, I decied to post this video of a manic Diddy at 5 am that he shot for his youtube diaries where bragging that he’s just like all of us, nothing but a man with a dream from Harlem, and now he’s done gone bought a clothing line called Enyce, while American is pretty much dying as the economy explodes, you know just like all of us, sitting on his private jet, paying whores to rub his insane head, spending stupid money, while the rest of us can barely afford a bag of chips and I am not talking the good chips, I am talking the 89 cent no name chips. Then he goes off calling himself the black Buffet repeatedly, because motherfucker’s got an ego, while explaining why he did what he did, pretty much proving the economic crisis works out nicely for the rich, while killin’ off the poor. So maybe Diddy is right, maybe he is just like us, you know considering we can’t afford a pot to piss in, while he owns millions of dollars worth of hip hop gear, but I like to think he’s fuckin’ crazy and needs to be stopped, so if you see any Enyce on special at your local TJ Maxx, don’t buy it, because if you do, you’re just lining this cocksuckers pockets and I think we’ve done enough of that. He’s a fucking rat-faced motherfucker who exploited his friend’s death to end up where he is today, he’s got no fucking soul, but he’s got soles on his 1000 pairs of expensive shoes he keeps in his dressing room. This video offended me, mainly because he was trying to tell me that I should be working at 5 am, because he is and he’s such a fucking success, while I think you should be drinking at 5 am. I guess that’s just one of our many differences. I guess Diddy isn’t quite like me at all.

Posted in:Asshole|Diddy|Puff Daddy|Sean John

2008

Oct

Stupid Black Video of the Day

9 Comments »

I don’t understand black comedy, but black people do. I went over to my black friend’ who was selling me weed at the time’s house a few years ago, and dude only had black comedies in his DVD collection. I’m talking Soul Plane, Friday, How High and the list goes on an on of movies I have never seen and will never understand. I tried sitting down to watch one with him after smoking a joint, and I didn’t laugh once. I didn’t get the shit. I consider myself pretty fucking ghetto, but not black ghetto and I guess culturally, I am just not in sync like I was Justin Timberlake.

This video was emailed to me called I Like Big Girls, by some dude who is big in the black comedy scene and has been in movies like Dr Doolittle 2, and the sequels to other hit black movies, making this motherfucker a sequel to Bernie Mac, Cedric the Entertainer, Eddie Murphey, and other black funny people and I decided to post it, because it isn’t funny to me, mainly because I am married to a big girl and the last thing I do is like her, shit’s a fucking nightmare, and gets pretty disgusting and out of hand, and instead of ripping into my one black reader by making fun of stereotypes of fried chicken, sex with white women and watermelon, I decided to give this Mike Epps motherfucker a chance….in retrospect, it was a pretty bad idea, because I just watched the video after writing this, and it pretty much sucked.

Drunkenstepfather.com, always wasting your time, with the worse possible uninteresting shit you can find on the net is my new slogan. I should make stickers…really fucking long stickers….just watch the video.

Update: Fuck it, here’s a 15 minute video of Coco in a g-string, showing off her fake tits and crazy ass….

Now I feel better about this post….

Posted in:Comedy Song|Mike Epps

2008

Oct

People Like Meagan Good of the Day

No Comments »

Here’s a video of busty Meagan Good at the Saw V premiere getting bugged by tons of people for autographs. I was a little surprised considering I had no idea who she was this morning, then slowly figued things out thanks to IMDB and realized that I saw her in a movie called D.E.B.S. It was about 4 or 5 years ago and snuck into the theater alone, thinking it would be funny to be the creepy old guy in a theatre filled with 14 year old girls, not because I want to do creepy things to them, but because I wanted people to think that I did, and upon sitting in my seat, realized half the audience was creepy old guys who were there alone, so in actual fact I wasn’t alone at all, but amongst like minded people. I don’t remember the movie, I just remember some dude next to me getting kicked out for exposing himself to the girls sitting next to him, but that was a long time ago.

I realize that her fame probably didn’t come from D.E.B.S. and that the people begging for autographs probably think she’s Flo Jo, Denzel Washington or some other famous black person, because when I’ve been to LA, I realize that a lot of tourists are there to spot stars and they’ll be happy meeting pretty much anyone who’s ever been on their TV in any shape or form, and they stand in places they think the celebs will go, like the Chinese theater, and hope the premiere they are going to be standing outside is a little more high profile than Saw V so that the autograph’s and stories of meeting someone famous are a little better received at the watercooler back in Japan or China where these kinds of fame hunting tourists are usually from, instead of coming back with Meagan Good’s autograph and constantly having to explain to people you are bragging to, who she is…..

Either way, here are the stills from the premiere, where you can see Meagan Good wearing a pretty tight pair of leather leggings from American Apparel, in the event you were lookin’ for a pair of your own, because you like the way tight fabric feels against your balls, and you are tired of always sneak into the laundry room to try on your mom’s pantyhose, don’t worry, no one actually knows about that, your mom just figures the dryer stretched them all out, she’d never think her baby was such a sick motherfucker, thank god for denial….

UPDATE: An insider told me the reason Meagan Good is getting rushed is because they thought she stole something.

Posted in:Meagan Good|Premiere|Saw