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Jessel Pena is the Instagram Of The Day

Heather Graham’s Old Flat Ass in a Bikini of the Day

Em Rata Gets Called Out for Being a Titty Whore of the Day

Brie Larson in the Great Outdoors of the Day

Sloppy Katy Perry is Rehearsing her Awkward Dances of the Day

2008

Sep

Suzan Hughes is Mangled in her Bikini of the Day

8 Comments »

Her name is Suzan Hughes and she’s some kind of Fitness Guru or some shit who was married to the inventor of something called Herbal Life who died of a drug overdose. She looks more like a plastic surgery out patient or someone attacked brutally by a plastic surgeon in a back alley because not only is her face mangled to shit but so is her stomach leading me to believe the 60 year old rich man’s wife who I saw in spandex reading her yoga book earlier today in the park is a far more credible person to go to for fitness advice but she didn’t appreciate me asking her if she was flexible and if she minded doing a little demo for me because I took a serious liking to her cameltoe and hard nipples in her sports bra, leading to believe that maybe you’re better off just turning to Google.

I guess the other sad news is that with the summer coming to an end, so will the everyday girls in bikinis which was depressing but with ending comes new beginnings and I stepped outside my house to see herds of school girls in school girl outfits that were shorter, tighter and more unbuttoned and cleavage exposing than last year, leading me to be reminded that the dude who invented these is just as perverted as the school faculty who enforces it and of course as every single man on the street who looks at the shit in amazement and that is exciting to me, more exciting than I can legally admit or videotape. So I like to think of Suzan Hughes bikini pictures as my out with the old and in with the new, right of passage from summer into fall as the leaves change color and a horrible winter approaches. Enjoy this if you can, because shit’s straight out of a horror movie.

Posted in:Bikini|Suzan Hughes

2008

Sep

Shitty Mainpage Youtube Video of the Day

4 Comments »

I accidentally saw this video on the mainpage of Youtube and it’s caption was “there are right and wrong places to take a bath”, so I clicked it, unfortunately. It’s petty much a video of a fat chick taking a pretty lame bath in a fountain in her bikini, only to get kicked out by a security guard after seeing her in a bikini for way too long. I would have kicked her out too, not because washing and brushing your teeth in my fountain is against the rules, but because fat chicks in a bikini should be against the rules.

The video goes onto an interview with her boyfriend about how crazy he is. The way they talk is a way I hate people talkin’. These losers would make me angry to be to be next to on a bus, train or plane or pretty much anywhere, not only because she is fat but because she thinks she is smart and what she is doing is clever and these pseudo intellectuals drive me crazy. the good news is that her boyfriend addresses the fact that people don’t want to see her naked even though he confuses her in a bikini for being naked and that’s pretty insightful as far as I’m concerned…..

What it comes down to is that the most entertaining thing in all this are the comments. Bitch may have got her 5 minutes of Youtube fame, but at least people are letting her know she’s fat and doesn’t deserve the attention. Here’s an example of a few that came in the last 2 minutes…there are 800 and I am too lazy to find gold, but you get the idea.

qnoboru
MAN THE HARPOONS

misteriousmaniac
This is an epic fail. Why is this bullshit featured?

mooosestang
She’s below average! Just because the average is obese doesn’t make it right!

Could the woman in the video please post her height and weight?

hylix25
This is incredibly stupid. Incredibly incredibly stupid. I just hope you arnt ignorant enough to think this is art or something because it isnt…

Wardfolio
Whenever you publicly take off your clothes looking like that, you deserve whatever harsh comments you get!

destructive21
All that jiggling at about 2:34 is mesmerizing.

Posted in:Video|Youtube

2008

Sep

Shannen Doherty’s Got Herself Some Shorts of the Day

7 Comments »

I did something stupid and almost got in trouble, but luckily I didn’t. I was walking down the street and saw an old lady in her support knee high pantyhose and a can trying to walk into the bank all hunched over and no one helped her in. I ran as fast as I could to beat her to the door, I was about 5 feet away, but still took some effort, I opened the door for her and as she walked in a instinctively slapped her ass like I was a little league coach and we just got a home run or some shit. She reacted all right and looked back smiled and gave me a wink, like I had made her fucking day, while I blushed in embarrassment for doing what I did, and some cunt coming out of the bank freaked out on me calling me a pervert and a sick fuck and went on about how offensive and inappropriate I was. I told her that I was just a good samairitan doing good or the people and that I hope someone gives her a little more than a little ass grabbing because she sure as fuck needs it and I wasn’t volunteering my services because I’ve done my charity for the day and because she’s not seducing me in her support knee high pantyhose. It was an unnecessary mess that I should of avoided, kinda like Shannen Doherty walking out of her house with this Halloween mask that is her face on. At least she’s got good legs in shorts and at least I got to grab some ass. I guess with all bad there is good.

Posted in:Legs|Shannen Doherty|Shorts

2008

Sep

Hey, Kevin Spacey May be Gay, You Don’t Say of the Day

9 Comments »

And I am apparently a horrible poet, mainly because I find poetry the gayer than Kevin Spacey in these pictures where he’s pulling down a dude’s pants before going at him with his hand then finger, then tongue, then penis until they switch turns, and Spacey bottoms out. Sure, you could assume that this pantsing is just a big joke and all in good fun and I get that because I once made the same mistake. I was about 14 and new to the country. I had very few friends except for the rejects no one liked. One of them, coincidentally named Kevin who lived down the street from me took a liking to me, he thought my accent was so funny and would always make an effort to hang out. He was the kind of kid who was into singing and dancing and was in Drama and always had girls calling him, but always ditched them for me. One night after watching a movie, I got up and Kevin grabbed my ass, I freaked out and he laughed it off like it was nothing. Another time, he tried to grab my dick, I freaked out and he laughed it off like it was nothing. He tried other things like pulling my pants down, wrestling each other where I felt his boner in my leg, suggested we measure our dicks together and try condoms on and it went on for about 6 months, before I realized what was going on. It’s just too bad that with all the warning signs, the only thing that really made me see what was actually going on was when I passed out on the couch after smoking a joint and woke up with my penis in his hand. I freaked out, ran home and it made for an awkward Monday morning. Our friendship ended there.

Kevin went on to try his chances in Hollywood and rumor has it that he got AIDS and died and I went on to live a straight life filled with empty sexual encounters with hookers while drunk and high in the gutter before finding out about the internet and doing this and despite not being the Kevin in these pictures, our stories seem pretty similar except I like to think my Kevin had better taste going after the skinny, Mexican who dressed funny and couldn’t speak the language and didn’t know better, while Kevin Spacey seems to be going for pretty retarded lookin’ motherfuckers not that I can judge a good lookin’ guy proper and I’m sure fags only judge a man by the size of his dick, but this dude seriously reminds me of cerebral palsy, or pre-mature baby syndrome and here are the pics of them smoking weed and doin’ some foreplay in public and the whole thing’s pretty awkward for a guy you probably thought was a great actor, without realizing that all actors are gay.

Posted in:Gay|Kevin Spacey

2008

Sep

Kirsten Dunst Could be Drunk But is Definitely Ugly of the Day

12 Comments »

Kirsten Dunst despite being pretty fresh out of rehab looks like she’s drunk as she leaves the club, at least I hope she is drunk because it would really be the only acceptable explanation for her make-up-less face lookin as sloppy as it does. I’ve met my fair share of drunk chicks, with half-closed eyes and sloppy double chins begging for another drink, only to realize I was lying when I told them I had a bottle of booze back at my house and leaving at my request to entertain ourselves by her giving me a blowjob since we’re out of booze, and I don’t really hate them for it, I just kinda figure it has to do with my shitty game, and leads to disappointment in myself, but not as much disappointment in myself as when I think back to the era when I found Kirsten Dunst hot with her big tits on her small frame, when I look back on that shit now, I have no choice but to ask myself whether I was gay or not for falling into her hard nippled, dirty haired trap that the media was feeding me. Lookin at her now makes me wonder how bitch even had a career, it’s one of those “this isn’t the girl I married” situation that dawns 10 years and 3 kids after you ruined your once hot bodied wife, only a little less personal since Kirsten Dunst is just nothing but a girl on screen for me, and I guess that’s way easier to accept than the woman I committed my life to…enjoy….

Posted in:Drunk|Kirsten Dunst|Ugly

2008

Sep

Isla Fisher Showing Off Some Bra of the Day

4 Comments »

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Here is Ali G’s baby momma showing off a little bra. I know these are some lame pictures and redheads are pretty much never hot and always freak me the fuck out with their pale skin and super strength from genetic evolution caused from a history of survival because in the middle ages redheaded babies were left out in the woods to fend for themselves because their parents thought they were the spawn of the devil and cursed and the gene was carried forward by the babies who survived by fighting off the elements and crazed animals of the wilderness while breast feeding off stray dogs and doin’ what they had to do to be around today. I guess the commitment is worth celebrating, and what better way than to post a picture of a redhead who just had a baby to help carry on the gene that’s already been through such a rough history and faced extinction, kinda like the Jews back in Nazi Germany, only my redhead theory actually happened at least according to me it did and that’s enough for me to claim it as fact, while the holocaust is just hearsay.

Either way, enjoy her exposed bra, like I enjoyed some fat trashy and poor 15 year old who was wearing some backless number the other day that exposed her bra. Her ass was fat and her pants were pink, her hair was half blonde and half brunette and her tits were hanging out of her shirt and I can only assume she was on her way to see her black boyfriend and found satisfaction knowing she’d be pregnant in the next 6 months, because being a slut starts with how much of your bra you are showing, it’s another proven fact that isn’t proven nor fact but is truth according to me.

* Access to material has been disabled in compliance with DMCA *

Posted in:Bra|Isla Fisher

2008

Sep

Caroline D’Amore in Some Staged Bikini Pics of the Day

8 Comments »

I had the pleasure, and I use that term loosely, to meet Caroline D’Amore. She happened to be badly DJing an event here that I randomly went to and after laughing at her and making her feel insecure about her shitty skills and Paris Hilton dance that I was convinced was a comedy routine, but was actually her life work, leading her to stop her set and having bouncers surround me, trying to kick me out, I managed to call her over and introduce myself and apologize for laughing at her because I thought she was joking around and wanted us to laugh at her and she went into a whole explanation about how she may not be a technical DJ but she loves what she does and people like me ruin it for her, I told her I am an asshole and mentioned my site and her eyes lit up, because unknowingly, I had done a post on her cameltoe years ago and had no idea and she loved it. Now I don’t know if she reads this site, but I do know that she Googles herself and I guess she also knows that staging bikini pics will get her noticed, despite not having a very hot face with her no-lips and jagged features, but with a body skinny and worth seeing naked to ask if you can lick her fiances name tattooed above her cunt, but the real selling point for this bitch is the fact that she is rich from a family owned Pizza chain, leading me to believe that after you cum, she runs to the kitchen to whip you up a slice, even though the truth is probably more like her spoiled little Paris Hilton influenced voice whining about random things as rich girls do.

We did manage to exchange emails, but never maintained a relationship or had cyber sex or got any exclusive pics because I guess she thinks she’s too good to me and that’s okay because pretty much everyone thinks they are too good for me. Just about an hour ago I got to talking to this hot slut garbage woman who I was fascinated by because I had never seen a girl garbage man, let alone a hot girl garbage man and when I stopped in my tracks to watch her throw trash into the truck, I invited her over to come pick up the garbage that is starting to stink up my bedroom and that weighs about 300 pounds and my is wife, she just told me to fuck off and took her tight hot ass to the back of the truck and drove into the sunset and by sunset I mean to the next block and it kinda broke my heart

Posted in:Bikini|Caroline D'Amore

2008

Sep

Britney Spears in Her Bikini on Labor Day of the Day

3 Comments »

So Britney is on some diet to try and get her body back into her original teenage goodness, I don’t think it’ll happen because she’s had a bunch of kids, but I do think she looks better than her sloppy crazy covered in dirt and probably stinky self of a few months ago, despite the fact that I like sloppy dirt covered girls because it usually means they have given up and when a girl has given up she usually lets guys like me inside them, knowing that it’s something they’d never do if they were of sound body as mind, but it makes no difference to me, except for the whole trying to ignore the tears running down their face so I can focus and finish what I’ve started and having the girl I’m inside crying is a buzzkill, but definitely not a deal breaker, once I get going, there’s no way I’m stopping, if you know what I mean.

Britney is actually inspiring and I figure if she can do it, so can I, so yesterday, I decided to do some moderate exercise to start the day in hopes of getting fit so I can leave my wife for some hotter, richer, older lady lookin’ for a Mexican who doesn’t pass out walking up a flight of stairs, so there I was trying to do jumping jacks, naked, with no blinds when my psycho eastern European neighbor who constantly yells at her dog and kids like they were back in communist country and has even threatened to call the cops on me at least 40 times for various insane reasons, saw me. She didn’t turn away, like I would if I got busted lookin at a chick naked from her fire escape, she just stared, laugh and shook her head, I think she even went to get her camera to post the shit on youtube, but I had done my 5 jumping jacks at that point and decided to give up on the whole exercise, but thankfully Britney hasn’t and here’s her new body.

Posted in:Bikini|Britney Spears

2008

Sep

stepLINKS of the Day

5 Comments »

I was just on a 4 hour bus ride smelling some old french man who must have been on a fishing trip the last 10 years and dude smelled like what you’d expect a hooker who died of a vaginal infection’ vagina smells like. We had plenty to talk about since we don’t speak each other’s language and the only think I understood was his excitement when the 16 year old girl in front of us would get up to go to the bathroom and he’d smile a toothless smile at me and say something I assume meant he’d eat that vagina out for days, but was just sleazy facial gestures. We didn’t exchange numbers to hang out, but I’m pretty happy he didn’t cut my head off. I had time to do the links, even though it’s labor day, working when I shouldn’t be for you assholes. Enjoy.

Fuck You Diddy
GO

Cross Dressing Gymnast
GO

There’s Something Differnt About Blake Lively, But I Can’t Put My Finger On It
GO

Be Gay Today!
GO

Jennifer Lopez is Still Disgusting No Matter How Much She Tries
GO

Teri Hatcher Upskirt
GO

Charlize Theron Could Kill a Baby And I Would Still Love Her
GO

Top Ten Funniest Movie Scenes from 1997 – 2007
GO

Wow….Just Wow…
GO

Weatherman Fall Down
GO

Get Something Done Today!
GO

Dolphin Love
GO

A Roundhouse Kick That Would Make Chuck Norris Proud
GO

Lana Wants to be Your Fantasy
GO

Martina Warren is Your Dream Girl
GO

The Very Sexy Zoes
GO

Brazilian Model Daniella Sarahyba
GO

Long Live the Spaghetti Cat!
GO

And That’s Why You Don’t Fuck with Mother Nature
GO

Find Girls to Fuck the Easy Way
GO

Things NOT to Say to Your Wife
GO

Amy Winehouse is Most Probabaly Brain Damaged
GO

Can Someone Please Just Kill Heidi Montag Already?
GO

Bai Ling Still Does What She Does Best
GO

Striptease of the Day
GO

Fuckin Hippies
GO

Now THAT’S What I Call Guitar Hero
GO

Rowdy Bitch Gets Humiliated By Cops At a Baseball Game
GO

The Dangers of Beastiality
GO

Dumb Bitch of the Day
GO

Do Yourself a Favor, Get Laid
GO

Who Doesn’t Like a Collection of Celeb Nip Slips?
GO

Rhianna Long Hair and Legs Throwback
GO

Dinner With Brooke Banner
GO

Who Says Porn’s No Good Anymore?
GO

Who Knew Kevin Spacey Was So Kinky?
GO

You Know, I Am Really Starting to Feel Sorry For Lindsay Lohan
GO

Uhh…No Offense Lady, But Your Kid Needs to Lose Some Fucking Weight
GO

Paint the Mona Lisa in .008 Seconds
GO

I Can’t Stop Watching This Video of Solange Being a Fucking Bitch, So Here It Is Again
GO

Amanda Lexx Looks Good in Orange
GO

Cheat at Roulette, Get Rich and Then Give Me Some of Your Money
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS

2008

Sep

Paris Hilton’s Push Up Bra Hasn’t Died of AIDS Yet of the Day

9 Comments »

Despite popular belief, Paris Hilton’s push up bra that makes her look like she’s actually got tits, did not die of Aids, but her dress is still the only pink thing she owns, since her vagina slowly weathered and turned grey like an old park bench that’s be sat on too many times…

Posted in:Paris Hilton|Push Up Bra