I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2008

30

Apr

Fearne Cotton Has a Weak Upskirt for the Environment of the Day

Here’s some Earth Kicking Lesbian in her billy boots, because the Earth Kick’s Ass and she’s ready to take out polluters and people who don’t recycle and haven’t gone Green like the rest of the bandwagon riders. Her name is Fearne Cotton, you’ve probably never heard of her, but she hosts Top of the Pops in the UK a country that you probably couldn’t identify on a map because it is a proven fact that Americans don’t understand maps.

Either way, whatever this promo shoot is for, the message isn’t getting to me because I am too busy trying to see if she’s got a Earth Kicking Lesbian bush under her skirt or maybe I’ll be able to make out the definition of her menstrual cup but what I guess it comes down to is that she’s trying to manipulate us to her cause by using her pussy. That slut.

Her shit may not inspire me to conserve energy, recycle but I will shit in a bucket and use newspaper to wipe my ass to conserve water and trees, but that’s just because I am weird and not because I want to save the world like some self-righteous celebrity who think she’s a super hero that thinks she is important enough to have and use her voice for good because the people…her fans… will listen to her and that’s just another reason why I don’t think the world’s worth saving and I am kinda excited to see if real natural disasters are like they are in WIll Smith movies….

Either way, as long a chick is flashing for her cause, not matter how lame the flash or the cause is, I’m willing to give her a couple minutes of time to give me her pitch because it’s a nice change from those other activists who are all man haters and left their vagina and sexuality behind when they took on this new lifestyle that demands change….

Posted in:Fearne Cotton|Weak Upskirt

2008

30

Apr

Amy Smart is Almost Topless on a Movie Set of the Day

This nipple tape bullshit reminds me of every hipster event I’ve accidentally walked into where girls think it’s not very lesbionic to put electrical tape on their nipples as they wear their mesh shirts. I don’t really fully understand that shit and I don’t really understand how this dude’s job consists of putting tape on a half-famous bitches tits, but it reminds me of the bus boy at the strip club who has to get on stage and shift change to disinfect the shit, only probably less hazardous.

I had this idea of going to the toy store the other day because I figured it would be a good place to be inappropriate. I walked around lookin’ for new mothers to harrass. The best I pulled off yesterday was taking one of those new born baby dolls and going up to the mom and asking her some trivial bullshit question that I knew would have an long drawn out response because new mom’s love talking about themselves as they hang out in their home in their post-partem depression while their husbands stay at at work late banging new pussy. Anyway, as this unsuspecting mom started going off on her rant about formula babies versus breast fed babies I slowly started undressing the doll and touching it inappropriately until she cut the conversation short, didn’t know whether to tell me off, call the authorities or just deal with her own awkwardness and it was funny.

Now I don’t approve of pedophiles and I think it’s some serious sick shit, but I do approve of making people feel ridiculous awkward in seemingly innocent places for a good time using a doll as a prop. I guess I consider creeping out a toy store an accomplishment an accomplishment Amy Smart probably felt when she landed a job that only had one half-assed taped up tit sex scene in it….because covering her nipples seems to be what she’s typecast for. It doesn’t matter – just look at the pics.

Some Tagged Pics Thanks To The Nice People at the Paparazzi Agencies…..Because They Want You To Know Who Owns These Pictures…Kinda Like The Time My Friend Gave Some Slut Herpes So She Would Never Forget Him…Only Not Quite as Nice of a Gesture….

Posted in:Amy Smart|Topless

2008

30

Apr

Brie Larson, Former Child Star Does Internet Viral Video of the Day

Here is a child star named Brie Larson, who could have been Miley Cyrus or Megan Fox but is instead starring in internet viral videos in her panties. It’s one of those one step closer to porn moments on her slow fall into the gutter while trying to cling on to the little amount of fame she got before her 18th birthday and now at 18 is ready to take shit up a notch to get noticed amongst the clutter of other 18 year old hot chicks trying to be famous so that she doesn’t have to go that last step and put a penis in her mouth on camera to get that feeling of fame she’s addicted to and has only had a taste of.

The truth is that I don’t realize how big the internet actually is. I just write this shitty shit I’ve been doing for years while the internet is becoming like cable TV all around me as mainstream media is trying to figure out how to tap into this place, but no matter how mainstream the internet gets, it will always be the place for loser virgins to congregate with like-minded loser virgins. So maybe I underestimate doing online viral’s because I think the internet isn’t a place of opportunity but a place for sexually confused outcast predators but that’s just because I am convinced the internet is just a phase that is not going to stay and because I’m keeping shit real 1996 style and haven’t had the success of bands got signed cuz of myspace, or a handful of writers who made movies about teenage pregnancy because of blogs, or how a handful of sluts got more famous than they actually should be like Tila Tequila, Perez Hilton and Paris Hilton, but I have asked a lot of girls for nude pictures.

Either way, here’s a viral and I normally hate staged viral shit about a girl who gets hired to babysit some mid-20 year old and it’s got a decent joke I can appreciate at the end so check it out.

Here are the screencaps of her in her panties….

Posted in:Brie Larson|Panties

2008

30

Apr

Paula Abdul Is A Nut Case of the Day

I was lucky enough to watch American Idol last night and it was pretty legendary. The show was broken down into 2 songs to be sung by each asshole trying to be famous and the judges did commentary half way through which means after 1 song and at the end after they sang both songs. When the commenting time came around the first time, that is after the first round of songs, Paula commented on both songs when the assholes who are trying to be famous only sang one song each.

This explanation is already confusing me, this video works about half the time, see it for yourself, because this is a whole lot of crazy. I am thinking the chances of Paula Abdul being a useless drunk is a lot more likely than her being a fucking bitch who can see into the future. I have come across the show every once in a while and Paula can barely formulate a sentence and now she can’t even figure out what’s going on in front of her. It obvious that her shitty positive words she leaves this singers with is written contrived bullshit and that she’s trying to read off a script that won’t stop moving on the paper because of the mix of meds and booze.

She is a fucking mess and I don’t understand why she is on TV. It’s embarrassing and I have better motor skills than this bitch, in fact I do everything better drunk than sober and even wrote a letter to my mayor about how I should be allowed to drink and drive with some kind of pardon because when I am sober I am too fucking shaky to hold the fuckin’ steering wheel straight and I am way more at risk of killing someone, they never answered me and it’s not a big deal cuz I don’t have a car or a valid license, I just had a lot of time on my hand to write a stupid letter.

Either way, here’s Paula crazy and I am running off 3 hours a sleep so this is going to be a fun day but not as fun the day I spent watching girls suntan in the park because it’s the closest thing to a beach I can find around this shitbox of a city.

Posted in:Uncategorized

2008

30

Apr

stepLINKS of the Day

I could tell you a long drawn out story about how I went to a BMW dealership to fuck with the car salesman by telling him I was an internet millionaire and showed up wearing a pair of stained, ripped jeans in two mismatched shoes and a shirt covered in brown stains that I am convinced are from my wife wiping her ass with it because she’s lazy and in all fairness it was white before she got her hands on it so it’s an honest mistake….but I’d be lying…about the BMW part…

Here are my links and if you’re wondering the above pic is of a reader’s wife in the kitchen with her pants off….everyone thank him for sharing.


Haylie Duff Should Put a Paper Bag Over Her Freaky Horse Head and Let me Bang Her Cuz I am Lonely…Hold Me….
GO

Her Name is Chilina and Here is Her Gallery and Video
GO

The New Batman Trailer…Where Heath Ledger Has a Drug Overdose…
GO

Keeley Hazell is the Queen of Boobs…At Least That’s This Link is Called
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Kim Walsh Side Boob Action
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THE HOTTEST WOMEN OF MEXICO
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Some Montreal Party Sluts in Action…See If You Can Spot Me in These Pics…DrunkenStepfather Version of Where’s Waldo….
GO

Car Shows Are Stupid, But At Least There’s Sluts to Make It Interesting
GO

Make a Finger Print and Fool a Security System
GO

Watch Web Cam Whores
GO

Cheerleader Daydream
GO

Use This To Find Sex, Because Sex is Fun
GO

Ready For Bed
GO

Mila Kunis Cover Shoot Video Because She’s One of My Favorites Right Now…
GO

Kristen Cavallari is Looking Good Enough to Fuck
GO

Pam Anderson Is Offically Now Allowed to Spread Her Hep C Across the Nation
GO

Gary Dourdan Knows How to Party!!
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Emily Rossum Looks Inoocent and Bangable
GO

Some Hot Britney Spears Action
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Amateur Shots of the Day
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The Greatest Kid Ever
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I’m Not Sure Where Hungry Is, But This Chick Is From There and She is Naked
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Some Old Hilary Duff Upskirt
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Some Bikini Wrestling
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Use this to Find Girls to Fuck – Because Girls Make Sex More Fun
GO

Crack Whore Clit Pierce
GO

The Hills Sluts Are in Rolling Stone
GO

Pure Class
GO

Rinaldo in a Tranny Hooker Scandal
GO

A Gallery of Hot Asses
GO

Find The Best Porn on the Internet According to Me….Which Isn’t Saying Much….
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Topless Talk Show Video
GO

Cat Deeley is a Slut
GO

Aria Giovanni Polka Dots
GO

Tom Cruise Banged Cher, Which Isn’t Surprising Since She is a Man and the Gay Icon…Kinda Like a Christina Getting the Chance to Fuck Jesus
GO

And Now, Some More Keeley Hazel
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Megan Fox Underpants
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Mischa Barton Looks Good for Once
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Some Celeb Sluts do Some Bikini Photoshoot
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Some Hot Chick Flashing in Some Staged But Hot Pics
GO

Some People Call Me Creepy, But I’ve Never Made My Own Dildo Cam..But You Can…With This Guide….Weirdo
GO

Top 10 Celebrity Drug Moments….
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Some Not Safe For Work Brazilian Travel CompanyAd Offers Good Times….
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SOME MORE SLUTS……..

Some Naked 18 Year Old Chick Named Valery in the Bathroom
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Some Hot Drunk Sluts Naked and Crazy Gallery
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS

2008

29

Apr

Jimi Hendrix 1968 Sex Tape of the Day

Jimi Hendrix liked filming himself fuck and I guess the girl who was in the film fucking him decided it was time to make some money,so she sold the shit to Vivid who are releasing it. I don’t know much more about the sex tape, but it’s probably one of the most obscure to hit and I guess dude won’t be too upset about it, considering he’s dead. I do know that he’s got 2 chicks on his dick because it’s the rockstar way and that made me realize that the sluts dyking out today isn’t anything new. I guess that’s the kinds of lessons we learn when our only form of education is through pornography.

Regardless of not being a fan of Hendrix, because I don’t play guitar and don’t think of him as some revolutionary, I am a fan of the bush, real tits and grainy black dudes fucking in the 60s so I will definitely download this shit illegally and watch it, even if it’s a piece of shit and doen’t impress me.

Speaking of not impressing people, I went to pick up my piece of shit computer that had the hard drive explode and asked them for my old hard drive in hopes of restoring the data. When they didn’t have it, I pretended to be pissed off and said “I have gigs of nude pictures of myself that I just don’t think I’ll ever be able to recreate”. The girl working the cash laughed awkwardly like the time I told the gas attendant who thought I was a girl because of my ratty long greasy balding hair that it happens all the time because of my big ol’ vagina. I guess people just don’t find me funny.

Either way, if more of this shit hits, I’ll be posting it, so ya’ll come back now.

Posted in:1968|Jimi Hendrix|Sex Tape

2008

29

Apr

Scarlett Johannson Does Tom Waits of the Day

I am not going to lie, I don’t hate Tom Waits but I do hate people who try to be Tom Waits. Not because I am some fag who thinks things like his music is so relevant that it should stay sacred like some psycho fan who takes life too seriously, because I got nothing else going on in my life, reality is I don’t have anything else going on in my life and I don’t even have any Tom Waits on my computer but I just don’t care if his songs are butchered because caring is as lame as the Art Fag Poser who covers his music to show the world just how obscure and deep she is. It’s like seeing a rich girl dressed homeless trying to denounce her rich girl ways while talking pictures on some second hand film camera because digital is for the masses and they are so different than the masses as they discuss politics and the environment taking life too fuckin’ seriously. We get it, you are going through an identity crisis, but why the fuck do you need to bother the rest of us with your bullshit, because you aren’t some social outcast living in a loft with 20 other artists, you’re some kind of poser celebrity living in a luxury loft singing Tom Waits so the world knows just how multi-dimensional you are. Go fuck yourself.

Posted in:Scarlett Johannson|Tom Waits

2008

29

Apr

The O.P. Campaign Casts Trash of the Day

Here’s some ghetto ad campaign for a ghetto bathing suit line that sells at Wal Mart and it’s starring a whole lot of useless people, like Rumer WIllis, Josie Maran, Kristin Cavallari, Christina Milian and some other assholes. They probably would have been better off hiring a whole group of no names who were actually worth lookin’ at in bikinis, not a group of ugly bitches and has-beens, but I guess there’s a reason why I am not a corporate marketing executive and instead spend my days on my couch.

I guess it’s nice to see Rumer Willis is still capable of smiling despite how fucking ugly her face is. I guess she’s got enough positive attention over the years that she doesn’t realize just how broken down she is. Maybe she’s just overjoyed at the fact that she landed some work or that someone actually asked her to get half naked and she’s up on this for free just for the chance to show the world that she’s good enough to fuck from behind. That’s assuming the company actually paid her, which I highly fuckin’ doubt and would make sense considering Wal Mart brands don’t have much budget. It’s like her big break because the last time anyone asked her to take off her clothes was her doctor and he was just checking to see if she had all her lady parts because her jaw threw him off and I guess there was that time that a kid in her class tried to fuck her in hopes of selling the sex tape to her parents to prevent public embarrassment when the world saw her penis shaped clit.

It doesn’t matter, what does matter is that Ashlee Simpson’s wife didn’t feel up to getting out in a bikini, I guess the whole marriage thing has lead her to let herself go a little.

Either way, here are the pictures of the stupid campaign.

Posted in:Bikini|Christina Millian|Josie Maran|Kristin Cavallari|O.P.|Rumer Willis

2008

29

Apr

From the Forum of the Day

The forum has a life of it’s own and it’s more interesting than me so here’s some of the shit going on there if you are looking for something to do, music to listen to or have conversation with non judgmental people since no one in your everyday life really listens to you when you speak….

Old and Floppy
GO

Young and Busty
GO

Big Bushy Thread
GO

Photoshop Thread
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Meat Curtains and Big Beans
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Jenni Lieta
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Field Hockey Girls Gone Wild
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Voyuer NUDE Beach
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The Tom Petty Thread
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Cee-Lo
GO

It’s Filthy and Disgusting in a Bad Way
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Her Boyfriend is Ignoring Her and She Needs Dick
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Moonspell
GO

Sexy Milf Slut
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2 Live Crew
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Melissa Midwest
GO

Posted in:Forum

2008

29

Apr

Jeremy Piven’s Got a Hot Slut of the Day

Jeremy Piven proves to the world that despite being overweight, bald and old, you can still get prime pussy, so long as you star on a TV show and treat everyone around you like shit because you think you are more famous than you are. This fake titty whore is definitely on some climbing the ladder shit, where Piven is the first wrung and the good news about that is that it doesn’t really matter what wrung you are as long as you are a wrung because when this bitch moves on to more important dick to further her career, there will be 100 new girls who are just as hot willing to jump through the hoops and by hoops I mean on your dick, because that’s just the way things are when you’re semi-famous and overpaid for offering the world nothing more than playing a useless role on a cable show, because these kinds of girls just over-achieving sluts but sluts nonetheless. So look at these pics and accept the fact that you made a shitty career move by taking that job at the factory when you should have swallowed your sexuality and taken your shot at acting because despite all the hot pussy and money, it’s still a career for homos.

Posted in:Bikini|Jeremy Piven|Slut