I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2008

25

Mar

Shannon Elizabeth is Dancing With the Stars of the Day

Since my images still don’t work 100 percent and since dancing is porn to me, here’s some Shannon Elizablth Dancing with the Stars who aren’t really stars, because if they were, they would be too busy getting real work that doin’ a quickstep on a shitty variety show. Either way, there was a time I got hard for her fake tits and I figure that out of respect to the death of her sex appeal, I should honor it by posting this is some shit. Kinda like that time we Weekend and Bernied my neighbor who had a drug overdose 2 days before we found him and we had to sit with his body until the coroner came to get it. It took about 10 hours, we were drunk and thought that the best way to honor him was by turning him into some kind of puppet and making him do funny puppet things. All it took was a little rope and a strong stomach because dude had a bit of a stink to him but it got a whole lot of laughs when we went to the other neighbors’ doors making him ask fora cup sugar.

Posted in:Dancing With the Stars|Lame|Shannon Elizabeth

2008

24

Mar

stepLINKS of the Day

I am having horrible problems with the fucking site. I don’t really know what’s going on but it may be the end of me. I talk to my host they don’t know what’s going on. I talk to the designer/coder and he doesn’t know what’s going on. I don’t know what’s going on. I just know that I can’t host pictures anymore and that kinda makes what I do useless….the good news is that I can still buy alcohol and drink it

Here are my links….

UPDATE – Images Work Again – I am Back..

Some Hot Ass Action
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Heavy Metal In Baghdad. I Know, Sounds Like an Oxy Moron, Right?
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How to Drink Your Beer on the Street Like I Do
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You Can Actually Wear Britney’s Clothes Instead of Putting on Those Panties You Found on the Street and Pretending You Are..
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Natasha Mealey Has Got Some Big Fucking Cans
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Seeing A Girl Naked for The First Time Will Probably Make You Piss Your Pants
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Do Yourself a Favor and Don’t Die a Virgin
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Bobby Billiard In Her Black Bikini. Say That 5 Times Fast Instead of Masturbating 5 Times Fast So Your Mom Don’t Catch You
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Myspace Weirdos That I Had a Good Laugh At
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If Heidi Montag is a Feminist Hero, then I am Skinny, Good Looking and Sober
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Yamila Rahn Si Makes ME Wish I Could Get an Erection
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And Now, The Grossest Story Ever, Courtesy of Amy Winehouse
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The Bitch Who Wrote Harry Potter Wanted to Kill Herself, or Something
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Oprah’s Dog is Dead. I’m Pretty Sure Stedman Killed It to get It’s Inheritance
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All It’s Official Penelope Cruz Will Never Be Your Girlfriend
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Pam Anderson is Looking Really Fuckin Rough
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Keep Your Dad Out of Your Porn Collection, Build a Motion Alarm
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For Those of Us Who Need a Little Help in the Morning
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I Don’t Know Much, But If There’s One Thing I Know, It’s Porn
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If Heidi Montag is a Feminist Hero, then I am Skinny, Good Looking and Sober
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I know You Said You’re Saving Yourself For Marriage, But I Think We Both Know That’s Not Going to Happen
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Go Gramma Go!!!
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Some Chick Bench Presses Another Chick
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Jello Pussy!!! It’s a Family Treat!
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Kylie’s Less Fasmoun Sister Danni in a Bikini. May Be Old, but Fuck You
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And Now, a Little Easter Celebration
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Make a Fake Pussy, Because I Know You’ll Never Touch a Real One
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Khloe Kardashian Goes to Some Party and Pretends People Care
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Here’s a Miget Dressed Up as Hilary Clinton
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Medicine Ball to the Face
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More Guitar Hero Fun
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Some Sexy Met Art Chicks
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Kevin Federline is Still Alive?
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Claudia Schiffer Sells Stuff With Her Body and Make Me Happy in the Process
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It’s Raining (John) McCain!
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The Simpsons South Park Intro
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Steve Carell is Gay
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FROM THE FORUM

Beatles Solo Albums
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Anyone Ever Tried The Spiderman?
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Tony Hawk Pro Skater 3
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X-Tina in Candyman
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Some Vanessa Hudgens Action
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He Says She’s The Best Looking Women, But I Don’t Know About That
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Hello Ruby KNox!
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What’s Your Fave Body Type
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Pollyanna Feels herself Cuz She Is a Perv
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Sabrina is a Slut
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Hot Stuff For You
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Rodrigo y Gabriela
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Sevendust Thread
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Counting Crows Thread
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Kool and the Gang
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Beyonce – Dangerously in Love
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Janet Jackson – Velvet Rope
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Paul Oakenfold – Global Underground New York
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Bananarama – Greatest Hits
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Dells are for porn Video
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Stupid Pics of Robin Meade
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Stupid Pic of Back Dimples
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Stupid Pic of Flintstone’s Viagra
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Download the Oxford Dictionary and Learn You Some Words
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Posted in:stepLINKS

2008

24

Mar

Miley Cyrus Goes to Church on Easter of the Day

Miley Cyrus goes to church on Easter and these are the pictures. I am not sure if the blonde chick is her mom, but I remember seeing her mom in an interview once and it made me want to see the Billy Ray sex tape…but the truth is that I’ve always wanted to see a Billy Ray sex tape. That Achy Breaky Heart tune really spoke to me and I feel the only way I can appreciate it is if I see him hate fuckin’ a bitch after she tells his Achy Breaky heart and it turns out that Billy Ray was right and it just doesn’t understand and does blow up and kill a man…all over her face….right before she wiped it off and put it in a jar in her fridge in the event her aspiring country singin’ lover ever accidentally hit big and that is the story of how Miley came about…

Either way, I wonder what god is going to think of this good little Disney Christian when he finds out that Miley found a loophole and let’s dudes fuck her up the ass because that way she can still technically keep her virginity until marriage since that’s what the church wants out of her. I am sure he’ll be a lot less disappointed that when she realizes that church is a lot less fun than fucking, doing coke and being a total cunt to the world while spending absurd amounts of money on useless shit while the rest of God’s people are dying of starvation.

Posted in:Church|Easter|Miley Cyrus

2008

24

Mar

Lindsay Lohan’s Lesbian Pizza Party of the Day

I was surprised to find out that lesbians ate pizza, I always thought they only ate pussy, but here is Lohan and her lesbian cock, Samantha Ronson on a pizza date, proving me wrong.

I always find it funny when the people I’ve known in my life have had to fuck off to rehab and they come back to the normal life and ask me out for a coffee because they don’t drink or do drugs anymore and coffee is their drug of choice. So I have to sit through hours of them spewing their self absorbed bullshit on me, like how they are changed and how they are never going to touch drugs again and how they realized in rehab that they really hated themselves and that is why they were self destructive and now they are working on a better happier life, while I know they are bullshit and 3 months or less later I run into them jacked on coke in a club talking about how they are cured and just dabble in the shit and 6 months later I get a call from them asking me for money, which is pretty fucking desperate because everyone knows I have no money, but I guess they’ve gone through all their other leads and are desperate and then a year later a get a call from a mutual friend telling me they are dead.

I am not saying that Lohan is back on the drugs, I am saying she was never off the drugs. She looks like the kind of girl who has a mother who fed her cocaine when she was 10 to keep a trim figure while staying energetic so that she could make more money for the family, she just went to rehab to save face and make the public and producers think she was making positive changes, while in reality she’s still a vagina lickin’ cokehead with too much money to ever stop and I think I love that kind of determination. Unfortunately, the lesbian cock she’s sockin’ is Samantha Ronson’s and that destroys any lesbian all the sex appeal from a potentially amazing video opportunity, if only another chick was cast for the part.

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|Pizza|Samantha Ronson

2008

24

Mar

Tara Reid is a Good Drunk of the Day

For someone who has drank a lot everyday for many years, Tara Reid proves to be a pretty articulate drunk. She’s barely slurring her words on the Red Carpet of some event she’s hosting at some shitty Studio 54 club in Vegas that is some kind of novelty take on the original but probably has absolutely nothing in common with it because that’s just how lame rip offs work. I guess the sad part of this interview is that Tara Reid wishes she was old enough to party at the original Studio 54 because that was the heyday for glamorous partying and now everyone seems to be doin’ the club thing and it’s about as exclusive as Paris Hilton’s vagina, which has proven to not be very exclusive at all.

I am hungover, I drank a lot for Jesus and his resurrection, while after peaking and being convinced I had alcohol poisoning while laying on the bathroom floor of the seedy bar I go to, I decided to resurrect myself and do a few more shots of whiskey and try to sexually harass a few more women, like some kind of son of god on Easter weekend but the way cooler version.

Either way, watch the video.

Posted in:Drunk|Tara Reid

2008

24

Mar

stepLINKS of the Day

In case you haven’t noticed, my site has been running like total fucking shit. I posted on Friday morning and nothing went live on the site all day, I blame Christianity for trying to bring me down on Good Friday, either way and the Catholic church for stealing my innocence as my priest made me jerk off to him. Shit’s supposed to be fixed now and I can finally post my links – so Here they are…click em.

Kat Von D is a Slut and Here She is Whoring it Up with Nikki Sixx
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Drillbit Taylor Rap Battle, Because You Think You’re Black
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Foot Fetish Fun
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Become a Heavy Metal Vocalist
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Winona Ryder is Shoplifting Again
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You Can’t Touch This
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Because You Are Going to Loose Your Hair, If You Haven’t Already
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Bedtime Pranking
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Find a Girlfriend, Because Your Mom is Going to Die One Day
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Rally Car Hits a Dear. Ouch
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Supermodel Daria Werbowy Nude on the Beach Photoshoot
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Playboy Celebrates Spring Break
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Top 10 Dominatrix Videos of all Time
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Paris Hilton’s Busy Schedule
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How The Fuck Is Nicole Kidman Pregnant?
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More Porn Than You Can Shake Your Stick At
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All These Girls Are Too Good For You. Actually, All Girls Are Too Good For You
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Liz Taylor is a Corpse and she’s lookin’ hot
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David Beckham Let Anderson Cooper Win
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I Wish Snoop Dogg Would Be My Friend
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How To: Pick Up Girls, Because YOu Need All The Help You Can Get
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Have some Sex, and See What All The Fuss is About
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Kate Beckinsale Would Rather Eat Vagina than Sushi. So Would I
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Butter Face Bikini
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Girl Face Plants From Truck
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This Chick Has Two Vaginas
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Sienna Miller’s Ass is Falling Out of Her Bikini
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Some Big Fucking Tits Right Here
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Make a Blood Covered Pumping Heart
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Cheryl Tweedy is a Hot Slut
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Winehouse Used to Look Normal
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Bikini Picnic!
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De-Motivational Posters
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The Best Episode of South Park Ever
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Genna Atkinson Will MAke You Shoot Your Load
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Celebrity Boob Showdown!
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Seemed Like a Good Idea
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The Birds and The Bees
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Jennifer Lopez and Devil Spawn
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FROM PHOTOBUCKET

Some Black Tits
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Some Girl Takes Pics of her Ass
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Some Black Pussy
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Some Black Nipple Lickin
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FROM THE FORUM

Naughty at Home
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That’s What I call a Vacum
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More Videos to Wank To. You’re Welcome
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Gettin Off on the Couch
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Counting Crows
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Question of the Day
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Pre-Release Madonna – Hard Candy
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Klaxons – Myths of the Near Future
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Public Enemy – Fear of a Black Planet
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The Cult – Electric
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RUSH – Gold
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TLC – CrazySexyCool
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I Didn’t See That Coming!
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Hot Slut Karlie
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Kiss Kiss
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MAD Magazine #1-10
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Playboy – April 2008
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Creating Beautiful Web Pages for Dummies
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Funny Oktoberfest Pictures
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Funny Free Cat Picture
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A guy goes to pick up his date
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Posted in:stepLINKS

2008

21

Mar

Penelope Cruz Boring Bikini Pictures of the Day

Boring as Fuck…..

Posted in:Bikini|Boring|Penelope Cruz

2008

21

Mar

Lauren Conrad Grabs Her Tit of the Day

So Lauren Conrad’s not famous and either are her tits. She’s not like her reality star friends, who aren’t even reality stars because shit is scripted harder than my prescription pill popping friend, but reality stars because MTV wants you to think it’s real because that makes it more exciting to watch. Either way, she’s bending over and giving your ass a peek at some tit, which brings back memories of every time you leave your house, because you are a pervert and scope out everyone around you out so hard, hoping just one of them will be a woman slippin up with her low cut shirt bending over to pick up her purse, or her lipstick that she dropped so that you have something to jerk off to later and the good news is that you won’t get caught like I always seem to be every time I get caught checking out a girl, but that’s usually because I am hiding in their closet and can’t seem to hold myself back from jumping into the bath or in bed with them when they least expect it. It turns out that not everybody likes a good surprise and that’s all I have to say about that.

Posted in:Grab|Lauren Conrad|Tit

2008

21

Mar

Kim Kadashian’s got a Fat Ass of the Day

The Friday Guessing game of the day is what size jeans Kim Kardashian wears. I am going with a size 32, which may not sound too big if you’re a dude and buying a new pair of Dockers for the company picnic, but women are a size 27 on average, proving my point that she’s fat, by not proving anything because I have no idea what her actual size is, I am just speculating because this girl has a fat ass and needs to stop being the useless lazy whore I saw in her sex tape and start being a little more active, since obesity is the number one killer today and if the rest of her body follow her asses lead, she’s in for a mess, I’m just trying to save her. I’m a hero like that.

Just the other day I saw a girl frantically searching for a tampon because she didn’t have one and we weren’t near any stores and she had no money on her even if there were stores near by. So, I offered her my penis, mouth and fingers to help her out, sure they aren’t absorbent, but I figure if you’re going to stick anything in your vagina it might as well be me. She ended up agreeing to taking my dirty sock, because I guess she thought it was better than nothing. In the next 4-6 weeks, she’ll realize that it definitely was the wrong choice because lets face it, I am not the most hygienic and even my feet try to keep me from wearing socks with all the scabs, blisters and rashes and god only knows if any of those are contagious…..

Posted in:Ass|Fat|Kim Kardashian

2008

21

Mar

Vanessa Hudgens’ Ass Crack at the Airport of the Day

The good news for you guys is that Vanessa Hudgens dates fags and since you’re pretty much as big a fag as they come, that should give you hope, because I know that you still like girls deep down inside, they are just so much less willing to have sex with you than a barebackin’ bear in the bathouse who pretty much has no standards and a raging boner.

Either way, this is her ass crack at the airport and I am not sure where she’s going, but I wish I did so that I could let you know so that you can go hang outside her hotel room and make her sing your dick just because he’s a huge fan of her work and High School Musical changed your life by making you want to go back to High School but only if you could do it in song.

I don’t know why I am posting these since seeing ass crack makes me think of fat men in jeans that are a couple sizes too small but haven’t accepted that they are fat fucks yet and insist on wearing them and not of the gateway to a young, willing 18 year old nude model/actress/singer triple threat in no panties because just a few inches away is her box. But that’s just because I don’t find Hudgens anything special, she looks like a monkey and I’d still let her throw feces at me from her cage while I jerk off, but that’s pretty much it. I may not have standards but I don’t do beastiality….

Posted in:Ass|Crack|Vanessa Hudgens