I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2008

19

Mar

Kristin Cavallari Gives Head at 13 of the Day

I got this email:

funny little fact- kristin cavallari taught me to give head on a flashlight at Camp Edwards in 2001 ( she went to my highschool, barrington high school, but then she got kicked out because she brought weed to school).

funnier fact- i’m drunk as fuck but fact number 1 is still true. i’ll send pics.

p.s. she’s actually a nice lil girl.. except for the fact that she was givin head at age 13

Firstly, I don’t trust any of my readers to have ever known anyone famous, let alone gone to the same camp as someone famous, but since Kristin Cavallari isn’t famous, I call this message FACT. There’s nothing wrong with a 13 year old giving head, unless it’s on you, you dirty old fuckin’ pervert. And there’s nothing wrong with her teaching her friends how to do it proper in camp, it’s kind of the rich girl way, along with developing an eating disorder, cocaine addiction and Paris Hilton attitude by the time they are 16….

It’s a whole new generation out there, I’ve heard about this young girl fucking shit on Oprah and I am jealous because when I was 13, the only head I was getting was the head on my root beer float….actually I was too poor for root beer floats, I just couldn’t figure out a joke for this. I am not very good at this blogging shit.

Posted in:Camp|Head|Kristin Cavallari

2008

19

Mar

Spitzer’s Whore was on Girls Gone Wild of the Day


Ashley Alexandra Dupré was a Girls Gone Wild Girl – It’s Spring Break 2005: anything goes a few years ago. If you’ve never seen Girls Gone Wild, you’d realize that it’s not a far cry from sucking rich jew dick for 1000 dollars an hour. It’s actually the pre-requisite because Joe Francis likes to take his staff on test rides before giving them the opportunity of a lifetime, or at least that’s his manipulative line because false promises of fame gets pussy wet.

What GGW does is along with giving 18 year old American’s on Spring Break in Mexico an insane amount of booze so they make out with their friends or flash their tits, only for their dads to find out and be ashamed of when watching late night infomercials, is interlace that party footage with shit set up with real pornstars/escorts that involves being in the hotel room and having a lesbian shower, shave and shit without the actually shitting because that’s not really his market, but it is mine….Either way, it turns out Ashley Alexandra Dupre was that hired girl who ended up dyking out on camera.

The truth is that she’s just a girl with a dream, doing whatever it takes to get to the top and Girls Gone Wild didn’t work for her but was accessible, so she hit the next opportunity to use her pussy to get her where she wants to be. This scandal has put her name on the map and the reality is that most girls use their pussies to get ahead anyway, because that’s the kind of cruel world we live in. I’d like to survey every famous singer, actress and model to see if they ever fucked to get something they wanted, hell, I’d like to survey every woman in the world to see if they’ve ever fucked a dude to get something they wanted. Just because you do it behind closed doors doesn’t mean you’re not a whore, sweetheart….

Either way, I hear Paris and Kardashian like this bitches style, they can related and want to trade secrets on taking loads in their cunts without getting pregnant. It really is a talent!

UPDATE:

Watch the Censored Video
GO


Close to 5,000,000 People Have Listened to Her Song…Proving Sex Scandals Are Good Marketing…I Need a Drunkenstepfather Sex Tape To Put Me on the Map
GO

Posted in:GGW|Spitzer|Whore

2008

19

Mar

Audrina From the Hills Gets Naked of the Day

I never really understand what goes through a girls mind when she takes naked pictures of herself, but then again I am not a reality TV star on one of the worst shows on TV. It’s obviously got something to do with wanting to get more exposure, because they know that nakedness means a lot more attention than just staging a nipple slip or upskirt or whatever the fuck else these bitches do to get famous, when not ready to go all the way with a sex tape. It’s like bitch thinks she’s too classy to get a dick in her on camera for the world to see, but she’ll dress like a cheap stripper in a slutty school girl outfit to show off her tits.

The story is they were an audition set she wanted to send to Playboy when she was fresh out of highschool, sexually charged and thought she was hotter than she is because daddy bought her a set of fake tits for her birthday because she already had everything else that she ever wanted and she wanted to show them off. She’s like every tacky club slut I see, with their short skirts and low cut top, showing off their Playboy Bunny tattoo as they step out of their Range Rover and I guess these pics really aren’t that big of a deal, since she’s not spreading her pussy apart, and this is some discount bargain basement version of an erotic photoshoot, but I guess if you’ve ever wanted to see her tits, now you can.

Check Out the Entire Set By Clickin’ This Link Cuz I Can’t Find the Fuckin’ Pictures to Steal….They all Have a Stupid Fucking Tag Across Them and Rumor is They Cost 10,000 Dollars Each, Money This Poor Mother Fucker Doesn’t Have and If I Did, I’d Spend it On Hookers.
GO

Posted in:Audrina Patridge|Naked|Photoshoot

2008

19

Mar

Shannon Elizabeth is Dancing with the Stars of the Day

So I figure that you didn’t watch Dancing with the Stars because you aren’t that comfortable with your sexuality and you’re scared it’ll make you want to take up dance since it’s so graceful and you don’t want your friends to call you a fag for it, so you do everything in your power to stay the fuck away from that shit. Even when an ex-Playboy cover girl is the ‘Star” dancing a fool in what looks like a panty-shirt showing off her legs.

The funny thing about this show is that the stars they find are hardly stars so when I watch a clip I have a hard time figuring out who is the famous one and who is the hired dancing instructor? It seems that they are so desperate to get people on the show that if you were an uncredited extra in a movie, like I was back when I drunkenly walked on set of a movie shoot at 5 am a few years ago, you’d qualify for the show….That said…I’ll put my dancing shoes on, I want to show the world how this man moves. It’s really quite angelic.

Posted in:Dancing With the Stars|Shannon Elizabeth

2008

19

Mar

stepLINKS of the Day

I was at the coffee shop today and I saw this dude who was in his late 50s, the chick in her 20s sitting together and I assumed they were father and daughter out having a coffee together. They asked me if I had any weed, which happens to me all the time because I look fat, lazy and homeless and they assume that I knew the street well enough to hook them up. When I told them I thought it was weird they’d be lookin’ for weed together, in some kind of father/daughter smoking weed together is awkward way, they turned around and told me they needed it because dude threw his back out 2 years earlier and it’s the only way he can really fuck her proper.

I figure some things are better left unsaid to some dude you meet in a coffee shop, but instead asked them if I could watch them go at it, they said no so here are my links.


Drag Queen Hooker is X-Tina’s Signature Style
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Shepard Fairey Interview that Was Kind of Cool
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Some Jessica Alba Goodness from Before She Was Knocked Up
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Steal a Bike Instead of Driving a Car. That’s What I do
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Britney Spears is Going to Be as Poor as I am Soon
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Some German Top Models Nudes Were Leaked, But that Doesn’t Surprise Me Because Germans Like Dirty Sex
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Give You Wrist a Break and Find a Real Girl to Fuck
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My Kind of Women. Except for the Fact that They Wouldn’t Give Me the Time of Day.
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Japenese Cheerleaders Give Me a Reason to Celebrate
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SHAKE THAT BOOTY!!!
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Ana Barros is in Her Bikini
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Women That Are Seen and Not Heard. Exactly How I like Them to Be
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Lohan Really Knows How to Keep Good Company
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Mariah Carey: People Think I am a Ditz
Us: uhh..No Shit!!
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Sex is Awesome, and This is Proof
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Here’s Some Porn You Won’t Have to Worry About Your Mom Finding
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Amy Winehouse is Diseased and I Want to Bang Her Cuz She Probably Smells Better than My Wife
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Gweneyth Paltrow is Fucking Boring
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Janet Jackson is Fucking Weird
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Get Rid of a Hickey, In Case a Girl Ever Touches You and You Don’t Want Your Mom To see
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Her Name is Liza Li and These are her German Playboy Pics…Worth Checking
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Kate Moss Nipples Posing as Wildflowers Photoshoot Hotness
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Wax On or Whacks Off Video
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Reader Remakes Addicted to Love Video – I Have No Fucking Idea Why….
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The Girl Who Killed Steve Irwin Has a Clothing Line
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Some Uncensored MTV Dirty Times With Cussin and Nudity
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Here’s a Hot Argentina Model You Want to FUck
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The Best Ad Starring a Bikini Model and Her Box
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Some Dude’s Funny Sex Offender Notification That You Dream About Getting
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Here’s Some Cisco Adler Talking About Gossip Shit Because He’s a Star
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Candice Michelle and Her Friend Showing Their Tits
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Some College Panty Party Pictures
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The 10 Greatest Huge Boob Exercises Videos
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Sophie Monk in a Mini Skirt Cuz I Love Her
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Heather Mills in Immature and I Want to Slap Her in the Face
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Fucking with Telemarketers is Fun
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My Kind of Window Washer
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Check Out This Nut Kicking Bitch
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Okay Some Japanese Gameshows are Even too Weird for Me
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Sarah Gibsom is Topless. Thats All I Have to Say About That
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You Stay Classes Baby!
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Katie Holmes is Lookin Haggard
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I Think I Need To Star in The Bachelor, Cause These Bitches Sound Like My Kind of Women
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Laundry Work Out For Your Body. And Hers Too
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I Guess You Will Have to Do
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What If Every Video on the Internet Got Deleted?
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Bikini Guitar Hero. That’s What I’m Talking About
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I’d Fuck Aunt Rebecca from Full House. But She’s No Stamos…
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Morgan Kennedy Looks Tight
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Some Hott Blonde that All Thr Brits are Diggin’
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Random Hot Girls That Want to Be Seen by You in Maxim. Seriously
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Rianne Hogan is Topless and Posing for GQ
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Apparently the Chavs in London Don’t Like Little Wayne
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These Animals Have Drinking Problems and Fuck, I can Relate to That
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100 Best Natural Breasts
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Here’s a DJ MIX By One of You That’s Worth Listening To
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FROM THE FORUM

The Journey Thread
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Teminator 3, Because I guess Terminators 1 and 2 Weren’t Enough for Some People
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Some Good Alyssa Milano Shots
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Some Liz Vicious Goodness
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Some Latina Ass
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Young ‘uns
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Tokyo Police Club – A Lesson In Crime
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Journey – The Essential Journey
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Def Leppard – Hysteria
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Robert Plant – Fate of Nations
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The Vines – Best of
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Peter Gabriel – SO
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Foldable Machine Gun
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Solitaire Suite 2008
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A man walks into a bar…
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Mommy Asks for a New Dress
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS

2008

18

Mar

Bai Ling’s Personal Pics of the Day

Her name is Bai Ling and I have no fucking idea what the fuck she does in her life, I just know that she attends all kinds of events and has the ability to always flash the camera her bigger than my dick nipples. That’s not saying much about my penis size, but it is saying something about her nipples….

Either way, I came across some of her personal pictures, so in the event that you were wondering what the fuck this whore does when she’s no too busy doing nothing, here’s your answer. From what I gather from my investigative skills as a tried, tested and true stalker who has served some time for my talent, she pretty much does nothing in her everyday life too.

The good news is that at least one person thinks she’s hot and that one person is her, proven by all the fucking pictures she takes of herself because no one else will….

Posted in:Bai Ling|Personal|Pics|Slut

2008

18

Mar

Kim Kardashian in Her Panties of the Day

In case you didn’t know, Kim Kardashian has an official site that I won’t link here because she’s already too famous for her own good and she’s promoting it the only way she knows how, but posting slutty pictures of herself on it. She’s in panties and that’s a little bit more than what she was wearing while Ray J pissed on her face in their sex tape. As much as I hate on her for being 20 pounds overweight and a talentless whore who offers nothing to the world, you gotta give some love to a girl who lets you videotape you pissing on her. I am not entirely into treating my women like toilets, unless they deserve it, but seeing a chick with no self respect because letting that happen means she has no self respect but a need to get attention, opens up so many possibilities of the things she’d be willing to do to you if your dick was big enough to get around that ass and if your sister was her employer. She’s in these pictures with that Audrey O’Day or whatever the fuck her name is from Danity Kane if you were wondering, which you probably weren’t because you’re too busy crying.

Posted in:Kim Kardashian|Panties

2008

18

Mar

Cheryl Tweedy Cole’s Nipple Slip of the Day

Girls Aloud are a useless Spice Girls tribute act from the UK, in the event you didn’t already know, but I have a feeling your bedroom wall is plastered with posters you got out of your Teen Dream magazine subscription because you’re creepy like that. The only one really worth a round is Cheryl Tweedy Cole and she is out at some party having a useless nipple slip and her nipples are all taped up, the same kind of fashion tip the whole group should be using on their mouths every time they get on stage because lets face it, they just aren’t that good.

If they really wanted to sell more tickets and hit up a broader audience, they should consider changing their stage show to one with more masturbation and fucking on stage. Pop stars are hypocrites, they act all conservative and wholesome when doing their jobs performing on stage, but the second you let them out on their own, they’re flashing cunt, doing drugs and most importantly shooting sex tapes….I feel like all the candy-coated lies should stop and they should give the public more of what we expect out of them, because we all know they’re just a bunch of sluts who must have sucked some serious dick to get where they are today and I think we deserve to get in on it in exchange for buying their music….

BONUS: Sarah Harding and Nicola Roberts of Girls Aloud Dyking Out Because They Are a Team….a Drunk LesbianTeam….hopefully practicing for a brighter future….

Posted in:Cheryl Tweedy Cole|Nipple|Slip

2008

18

Mar

Kristin Davis Sex Tape of the Day

Image Removed due to Papparazzi

REMOVED IMAGES BECAUSE KRISTIN DAVIS HATES BLOGGERS AND THREATENS TO DESTROY OUR LIVES

In boring celebrities who aren’t really celebrities trying to get more media attention news, Kristin Davis from Sex in the City has a rumored sex tape being shopped around and these are the screen caps. Now I don’t even recognize my wife after she showers, so I am not the person to tell you whether these dick suckin’ shots are of Kristin Davis, but I figure since you have a thing for female celebrities, you’ll have no trouble busting out your geek software in your pants to figure this shit out. What I do know is that whoever is doing the dick suckin’ in these pictures is boring, I like bloody noses when I get head, but that’s usually because giving the bloody nose is the only way I can convince girls to get down like that. It’s called tough love motherfucker.

Click on the Box Shot Picture to See the Blowjob Pictures -Cuz I Don’t Post Dick On the Site…I’m Not Gay Enough For That….

REMOVED IMAGES BECAUSE KRISTiN DAVIS HAS ENOUGH MONEY TO RUIN MY LIFE

Posted in:Blow Job|Kristin Davis|Sex Tape

2008

18

Mar

Ivanka Trump and Her Expensive Cleavage of the Day

I met a poor chick who was so proud of her tits because she saved up all her money for so long to get them. She said that the first set cost her 8000 dollars and the upgrade was another 5000 dollars and that she had spent over 2 years saving for each. She insisted I fondle her tits to see how good they feel and because she wanted to break them in like a new pair of shoes. I feel like Ivanka Trump is a lot less generous with her purchases, mainly because she’s a rich kid and doesn’t understand that value of a dollar and the happiness that someone with no money has when they finally get something they want so badly.

Ivanka in her cleavage revealing dress, is like that rich kid you grew up with who always wanted you to go over but would never let you play with his Nintendo, you’d just sit there and watch the motherfucker and think to yourself how much of an asshole he was for showing the fuckin thing off but not letting you up in that like you wanted.

Posted in:cleavage|Ivanka Trump|Tits