I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2008

07

Mar

Maria Kanellis at her Playboy Launch of the Day

Here is some broken down WWE chick, Maria Kanellis and she’s celebrating her big Playboy spread. I guess she looks so happy because it’s pretty much the height of her career and she’s hoping it leads to better jobs for her by getting noticed by the public, instead of just by her creepy WWE fans. I am pretty sure when she was a little broken down slut back in her high school, she had would lie in bed at night and dream about the day a magazine will pay her to pose naked for her, because she realized that all that getting naked for free was only giving her some unwanted pregnancies and a false sense of popularity because the dudes in her school liked that she put out.

The good news is that she can take a beating and that’s what we all need out of a future wife, or girl we cut out naked pictures of and staple to our couches pretending she’s our wife, because when that cut out turns you down when you ask for a blowjob, it’s got another thing coming…so she knows better for next time….

Posted in:cleavage|Maria Kanellis|Playboy|WWE

2008

07

Mar

stepLINKS of the Day

My wife had some special event to go to for a friend from her old job’s retirement party or some shit and she was all fucking excited because it meant getting out of the house and having a wife time. My wife is a little delusional and thinks she has it going on when she takes some time on herself to get ready, because she normally is too fuckin’ lazy to put on make-up or do her hair or wear anything that doesn’t have an elastic waste band…she was trying to brag to me about how great she looks and how everyone will be in awe and want pictures. I tried to explain to her that they will just be in awe that someone that big is still alive, like they are witnessing some kind of medical miracle because no heart can handle the kind of shit she puts it through just trying to get off the fuckin’ couch.

She told me I put her down to make me feel better about myself and so that she feels undesirable and will never leave her….I tried to explain to her that I want her to leave me and the fact that I wake up to her everyday makes it impossible for me to feel better about myself. What makes me feel better about myself is that I had the night to myself with the hope she meets someone new. I am drunk and here are my links…

19 Year Old Dancing With the Stars Chick is Staying a Virgin Til Marriage But Probably Sucks a Mean Dick
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Here’s a Compilation of Kelly Brook in Hot Action
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Guess The Ugly Celebrity Baby
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How To Have Hot Webcam Sex…
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Sophie Monk Totally Naked in a Movie…Amazing
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Mary Kate Olsen’s Last Boyfriend Died of a Drug Overdose and her New Boyfriend Was in a Coma From a Drug Overdose for 3 Months…
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Telamundo’s newest star Monica Noguera Posing Sexy
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FOUND PORN
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Some College Girl on Girl Action
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The 27 Most Hilarious Album Covers of All Time
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Camilla Belle is Worth Fucking
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Some Hot Sexy Panties in Picture
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Some Club Slut in a Gold Bikini
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This Bitch has the Tightest Ass I’ve Ever Seen
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Asian Photographer’s Go for the Upskirt
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Fat and Lazy Katherine Heigl Eats While Her Husband Does All The Work
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Bruce Willis Likes Smoking Weed
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Rihanna and Chris Brown Getting It On
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A Bunch of Jamaican Chicks Beat up a Dude
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Rachel McAdams is Boring But Still Shows Off Her Legs
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Lucy Pinder in a Hot TV AD
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Some Topless Chick Rockin’ Out on Guitar With her Cat
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How To Use a Cock Ring….
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Obama has Some Ties to Terrorism
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Kate’s Playground in a Throwback but Fuckin’ Hot Video
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More Topless Pics of the IU Cheerleader
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Some Vagina Pastries are Cheaper and Taste Better than the Vagina You’re Getting
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Some Gossip Columnist Recreates the Lohan Pictures
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St Patrick’s Day Special….Celtic Cuties
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A Tribute to Jennifer Aniston’s Ass
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Jay Z and His Successful Jewish Banker Friend Bang Julia Stiles
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Tyra Banks in a Mini Skirt Showing Off her Mid Section
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Here is a College Facial
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Jenna Jameson’s Ass Flash on the Runway
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Big Breasted Japanese Model Gets Arrested
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How to Perform a Self Breast Exam
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A Granny in a Corset To Get You Excited
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Some Chicks Dirty Dancing and getting Naked
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Some Creepy Virgin Dude Talks About Being a Zoophile Weirdness
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Some Hot Chick Posing with an Exotic Car in her Underwear
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Some Flavor of Love Bitch Posing
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How To Live Out Your Sexual Fantasies
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Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
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Here is a Beefy Fucking Pussy
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FROM PHOTOBUCKET

Some Floppy Fuckin’ Photobucket Tits
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FROM THE FORUM:

Some Slut named Andrea
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Close Up Hidden Toilet Cam
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Young and Busty
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Tiffany
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Lifehacker PDF
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Vanessa Hudgens
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Pre-Release Gnarls Barkley
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Explosions in the Sky
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L7 – Bricks Are Heavy
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RJD2 – Since We Last Spoke
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Winslow – EP
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Dead Prez – M-1 Condidential
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Arctic Monkeys – Whatever People Say
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SEND YOUR DRUNKEN SPRING BREAK PICTURES HERE!
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This Will Help You Get Pussy
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Find Girls To Fuck Now.
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She Loves Monster Cocks…..Too Bad For You
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Posted in:stepLINKS

2008

06

Mar

The Weirdest Fetish of the Day

With the obesity problem on the rise and with a wife who is as big as a cow, Lohan gaining weight and girls like Kim Kardashian being loved by all. I find myself drawn to this fetish. It seems to be a solid preview of what’s comin’ our way.

Posted in:Cow|Milking|Weird Fetish

2008

06

Mar

Molly Shannon Upskirt on the View of the Day

If you are feeling really fucking desperate and horny or if you re really fucking drunk, then you will appreciate this video of Molly having a practically non existent upskirt, because I think it’s safe to say that is the only kind of male attention this bitch gets. She is one of the few girls dressed like a catholic school girl who made me feel sick to my stomach and now bust all over my stomach and her disgustingness continues as she ages. I guess the good news for her is that someone somewhere found her funny enough to give her a career because we know she didn’t suck dick to get to the top because no one would want to admit to letting her go down on them by giving them work, so her being the funny ugly girl strategy worked better for her than it did for me, even though I look better in a pair of panties.

Posted in:Molly Shannon|The View|Upskirt

2008

06

Mar

Kelly Rowland Admits to Having Implants of the Day

So we all knew those of us who still know who Kelly Rowland is also knew that she got a new set of tits recently and now she admits that she went from A cup to a B cup and that she’s been thinking about it since she was 17.

She also said that she got the bigger tits because she couldn’t fit into designer clothes and figured that designer clothes was all she had going for her, that she might as well do it proper. If she had that same determination in her singing career as she does in dressing up, then maybe she wouldn’t have been Beyonce’s back-up singer scraping up media attention the easiest way she can.

I guess it gives young girls a great role model to look up to, now 14 year old girls everywhere who haven’t developed tits yet can feel inadequate and hate themselves at a young age.Dreams of wearing designer clothes will be shattered because they don’t have tits. and even even when they get boobs, they won’t be happy with them because they’ve hated them for so long they can’t see how good they actually are.

I predict the future holds very few natural tits and I’d blame it on Kelly Rowland, but I guess the truth is that she really isn’t that relevant anymore and breast implants or not, kids don’t give a fuck about her and the only thing these breast implants have changed is her underwear drawer.

Posted in:Breast Implants|Kelly Rowland|Tits

2008

06

Mar

Kim Kardashian is a Fat Chick in a Bikini…of the Day

You motherfuckers are crazy. I constantly get Kim Kardashian supporters bitching me out for saying that she has a fat ass because she eats too fucking much and doesn’t exercise, and that all you fuckers are just confusing sloth lazy over-eating fat with sexy natural booty bullshit because she doesn’t have cellulite because her fat is so compacted that the skin looks smooth, when really it’s just tryin’ to hold it all in there without exploding all over the place. It is the same reason your 300 pound beer belly is harder than Reggie Bush’s 6-pack and I think it needs to stop because I think it’s giving her an ego.

Most fat chicks swim in their t-shirts, but this bitch seems to think it’s ok to wear a bikini. She also thinks it’s ok to pose for Playboy. What bitch needs to do is spend some time with her boyfriend’s personal pro-athlete trainer, not more time thinkin’ her body is good enough to flaunt, even though I’m still checkin’ it out, but I am a easy to please. If you’ve seen my wife you’d know why.

Either way, if she doesn’t put an end to this shit now, I can guarantee 5 years from now, things are going to be fuckin’ messy, and I am not just talking about her shit stained designer panties because she can’t reach around her stomach far enough to get in between her ass and wipe properly, I am talking about her whole fuckin’ body is going to be consumed in disgusting. I guess the good news for her is that she is rich enough to hire someone to wipe for her, and I would rather be doing that for work, than doing it here on my wife for free a couple of times a day.

I guess there will always be dudes who like fat chicks and fat chicks in training and here are the pictures to look back on when you see her being craned out of her house for an episode of Oprah in a few years while she’s pushing 700 lbs and some of you will still be jerkin’ off to her big ol’ ass, but that’s because you’re a sick fuck.

Posted in:Ass|Bikini|Fat|Kim Kardashian

2008

06

Mar

stepLINKS of the Day

I wrote Diablo Cody this Email:

hey good writer

I guess you’re pretty proud that someone has finally recognized a talent you always thought you had. I have a blog too, but I don’t know how to write. I came across your movie and got a boner, the first boner that I’ve had in a long time, so thanks but I don’t think it has anything to do with your movie, I just think teenage pregnancy gets me excited, not to mention the group of lesbians making out in the theater because they know pregnancy isn’t a problem their lesbianism faces. I can’t wait for you to come back to being an internet loser where you belong….

Good luck –

With Love,

Jesus Martinez
DrunkenStepfather.com

She never answered. Here are my links….

SPRING BREAK MOMENTS INVOLVING DRUNK GIRLS
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Nicole Richie Hates Her Big Mom Tits
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Her Name is Suzanne Shaw and This is Her Vagina
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Trashy Club Slut With Some Nipple Pasties…
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How To Have Anal Sex For the First Time (No Homo)
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Britney Spears and her Pregnant With Burgers Belly
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Her Name is Cat Deely and This is Her in Arena Magazine Lookin’ Hot
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Salam Hayek as the Vampire in that Movie Lookin’ Fuckin Hot With a Python
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Check Out This Photographer’s Collection of Slut Pics…Scroll Down….
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Here are Some Pictures of Jana Foxy in some Pretty Tame Pics You’ll Still Jerk Off To
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You’ve Jerked Off To Tera Patrick Now Give Her Some Respect and Read What She’s Gotta Say
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Here is a Song About a Craigslist Ad From A Girl in Love With a Man She Saw Masturbating in his Car
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Some Idiot Lights His Balls on Fire
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Diva Cunt Kimora Lee Simmons Shows Some Cleavage
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A Whole Lot of Self Shot Pictures of Amateurs
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Paris Hilton Does Some German Maxim Magazine
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Some Streaker at a Football Game Gets Tackled
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Some Angelina Jolie Tits
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The Anna Nicole Smith Movie Trailer
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Here’s a Pretty Ridiculous Mug Shot
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Some Columbian Chick Naked in a Bunch of Movies Compilation
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How To Masturbate Video
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Some Chick Named Lisa Daniels Gets Naked
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Some Christina Aguilera Photoshopped to Shit Pics
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Steve-O Gets Initiated Into ManHood With Some Tribe
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Some American Idol Chick Grabbing Her Tit
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Brown Kid in Desert Sees His First Car and Gets Excited
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Veronika Hanakova In Panties All Alone at Home
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That Kanye Slut Trina in Lingerie for Black Men Magazine
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Heidi Klum is Posing Like a Ref I Want to Fuck
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Some Car Show Model and Her Myspace Pics
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Harry Potter Gets Some Serious Death Threats Against Him – Thank God
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Moment of Truth RECAP Because We Love Exposing Sluts
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Shitty Female Comedians Do Vanity Fair
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Some Asian Grandma Learning English is Funny
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A Pornstar Shows You How To Prank Your Friend on the Toilet
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Club Sluts Dyking Out in lingerie For You in the Club because You’re Not There….
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A Couple Webcam Teens in Bikini’s Acting Crazy
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Demi Moore and Her Kids in Harpers Bazaar Lookin’ Like Their Retarded Selves.
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Eva Mendes is Hot Out of Rehab
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Some Girl Gives Birth to a 14 Inch Dildo
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Bare Ass in a Sleeping Bag Ad
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Top 10 Celebrities with the Smallest Boobs
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FROM PHOTOBUCKET:

Some Black Chick and Her Dick
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FROM THE FORUM –

Hot ASSSS
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College Tits
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Consideration is Nice
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Family Guy Upskirt
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Ultimate Defrag
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Pre-Release Snoop Dog – Ego Trippin
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O.K.
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DJ Shadow – Preemptive Strike
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TV on the Radio – Return to Cookie Mountain
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Richest man in Babylon
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Peter, Bjorn and John – Writers Block
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Black Crowes – Warpaint
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No Doubt – The Singles
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Use This To Get Sex..Because Sex is Fun
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Use this to Find Girls to FUck – Because Girls Make Sex More Fun
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Find The Best Porn on the Internet According to Me
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Posted in:stepLINKS

2008

05

Mar

Lindsay Lohan’s Belly of the Day

Here are some pictures that are going around that are getting people talking because they are saying she looks a little fat in the uterus like she could be pregnant, without taking into account that this girl is a pro at getting abortions. I think it’s more likely just her period but then again I am pretty sure both are impossible because of the hysterectomy she had done to stop the spread of her HPV because cervical cancer’s not fun and letting random dudes cum inside your vagina is. So I guess Lohan is just replacing a cocaine and drinking addiction with an emotionally eating fast food addiction while still dabbling in cocaine and alcohol addiction like she’s John Candy or some shit.

I remember when my wife first started getting a little belly. She used to ask me if she was gaining weight and I’d always say that she wasn’t and that I liked it, which was true. Next thing I knew, she was so big she couldn’t even see her dick when taking a piss….no wait a minute that was me, but my wife’s pretty fat too.

I don’t mind that she’s got a little belly, I actually find the whole thing kinda cute, what I am worried about though, is the of example is this giving the young girls around the world, soon they are going to think it’s okay to be fat and without a negative body image all the pussy you’ve been getting will start being hard to get….

Posted in:Belly|Fat|Lindsay Lohan|Nipples|Tits

2008

05

Mar

Kim Kardashian’s Beauty Secret of the Day

So girls, the key to getting a fat set of tits and a fat ass according to Kim Kardashian is to eat as much junk food as you can while keeping physical activity to a minimum because she has enough money to hire people to do the exercising for her.

The only flaw in this system is that it only works for a handful of girls who gain weight in the right places and that it is possible to eat just a little too much of the shit that your slow metabolism just leaves you fat. A route Kardashian seems willing to take based on these pics. The good news is that no matter how fat you are, there will always be a ridiculously tall skinny white dude and a ridiculously large penised black dude willing to give you some loving.

Either way, here is Kim Kardashian and her big ol’ tits eating ice cream while lookin’ like fuckin’ shit, I guess her no matter how big her tits get, her testicles never seem to disappear.

Posted in:Fat|Huge Ass|Huge Tits|Kim Kardashian

2008

05

Mar

Katarina Witt and Her Figure Skating Tits of the Day

Figure skating is the gayest sport to be a fan of, but an even gayer sport to take up, even if it means you are outnumbered by a ton of bitches who train so much they can’t find time to meet guys outside of their sports, leading to a lot of pussy for you, because no matter how much pussy you’re getting, dancing around on ice doing little hops, skips and jumps in glittery pants with skates on out gays the vagina. So despite thinking you have the last laugh while the rest of your friends are jerking off to music videos, it’s just a matter of time before the other male figure skaters win you over in the locker room and start giving you handjobs….

The good thing about figure skating is that it is on TV a lot and it is one of the only professional sports that you can jerk off to. It is a constant upskirt, camel toe, ass fest on ice where every once in a while one of the girls has a huge set of tits and a body that doesn’t look like other female athletes or a man and the only gay thing about that is that you have a penis in your hand and you’re making it cum, but I guess that can be looked over since it is your own penis.

Here is Katarina Witt performing what is said to be her last figure skating appearance with her tits.

Posted in:Figure Skating|Katarina Witt|Tits