Ashlee Simpson

Tera Patrick

Some other bitch

Fat Shakira “Cameltoe”

Britney Spears

I am not the most observant person. I sit in my drunken stupor and find excitement in the little, less important things in life. I like watching the two cockroaches in my bathroom have sex, at least I think they are having sex. It brings back memories of when I was homeless and people used to watch me and my girl Sally fuck in some pissed-up alley behind some local bar. The sex was amazing but the smell was horrible and by horrible I mean almost as bad these sluts who all went out and got themselves some black dress for the Billboard Music Awards. We are livin’ in an era where we can get fabrics in all colors from the China man, so I guess it’s just a statement that the Billboard awards are boring as shit, and by shit I mean death, like going to a funeral, or raping yourself with something sharp, like glass. I don’t fucking know, I said I am not that observant, I dont even know when the Billboard Awards were on. Remember, you can always suck my dick.

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I like strippers. I don’t think I have every said anything that would make you think that I don’t like strippers. I would eat my three meals a day at the stripper buffet if I could afford it, but being an unemployed mexican puts a damper on things. I am forced to turn to the computer, just like you,but the only difference is, I am not scared of the world and hiding in my mom’s basement. I am just lazy. Either way, I found this gallery called Suicide Stipper and it’s of some horse toothed bitch playing around in her underwear with a condom and a gun. I don’t understand why a stripper would be playing with a condom, that shit aint hot and condoms are for pussies not for strippers. They are professionals and immune to disease. So next time you fuck a stripper or a whore and she gives you a condom, remember that you’re paying her and you call the shots, that is until you knock her up and have to pay child support while tending to your herpes.

Check the Gallery Here

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I am sitting at home watching Regis and Kelly, like every good unemployed Mexican does and get all excited when they announce that Lohan is on the show. She ended up calling in sick because of “food poisoning” and was a no show, forcing Regis and Kelly to play clips of Regis singing xmas songs. We all knew Lohan was a dirty coke slut, out suckin’ dick til all hours of the night, I’ve just wanted to bring it up again and I won’t stop til Lohan doin’ lines off my dick.

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I am sitting at home watching Regis and Kelly, like every good unemployed Mexican does and get all excited when they announce that Lohan is on the show. She ended up calling in sick because of “food poisoning” and was a no show, forcing Regis and Kelly to play clips of Regis singing xmas songs. We all knew Lohan was a dirty coke slut, out suckin’ dick til all hours of the night, I’ve just wanted to bring it up again and I won’t stop til Lohan doin’ lines off my dick.

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You know that I am completely against Piracy unless it involves an eye patch. I fucking love eye patches. I predict that the eye patch will be the hipster accessory of 2007, but this isn’t about hipsters or eye patches, this is about downloading MP3 albums. A dude I know sent me this link to plug. Some of you may find it useful, even if it’s in some language I don’t understand

So here if you like music and don’t mind foreigners, Click the Link for some decent albums.

I’ve dont my community service for the day, you hurtbag losers. Go to a fucking store and buy the god damn CD. Criminal.

LOVE

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It is official. DrunkenStepfather.com has a Stalker. I am officially an internet celebrity, I feel like Julia Roberts or some shit.

Instead of hiding in my pool house, my stalker’s been emailing everyone in my myspace friends list about my 15 year old tech guy, who is too busy masturbating to make me a fucking site.

This is the bullentin I posted on myspace.

There’s some child molesting motherfucker messaging my friends list talking some crazy shit about my tech guy, who is a 15 year old boy who goes to school with one of my step daughters.

I am guessing that this motherfucker used to be his camp councilor, gym teacher, baseball coach, priest, swim instructor, or someshit and is bitter that my tech guy got pubes and a bigger dick than him now.

It’s always embarassing to molest a boy with a bigger dick than you…

Anyway his name is “k” and if he mentions me – tell him to fuck off,

Thanks in Advance

and

Cuddles

I don’t like people who try to fuck with me or my site, but it is pretty fucking funny. Next thing I expect is you fuckers to send in naked pics of your girlfriends or do other things that you do to Internet Celebrities (I know you never met your girlfriend, but she’s great at IM. You fucking loser. Thanks for nothing).

I decided to make “K” an internet celebrity too but the “Fake Profile” stalker’s been using cuz he aint man enough to do it under his real shit has been shut down.

This has been a waste of time, but I hope you enjoy the pics- weirdo.

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It is official. DrunkenStepfather.com has a Stalker. I am officially an internet celebrity, I feel like Julia Roberts or some shit.

Instead of hiding in my pool house, my stalker’s been emailing everyone in my myspace friends list about my 15 year old tech guy, who is too busy masturbating to make me a fucking site.

This is the bullentin I posted on myspace.

There’s some child molesting motherfucker messaging my friends list talking some crazy shit about my tech guy, who is a 15 year old boy who goes to school with one of my step daughters.

I am guessing that this motherfucker used to be his camp councilor, gym teacher, baseball coach, priest, swim instructor, or someshit and is bitter that my tech guy got pubes and a bigger dick than him now.

It’s always embarassing to molest a boy with a bigger dick than you…

Anyway his name is “k” and if he mentions me – tell him to fuck off,

Thanks in Advance

and

Cuddles

I don’t like people who try to fuck with me or my site, but it is pretty fucking funny. Next thing I expect is you fuckers to send in naked pics of your girlfriends or do other things that you do to Internet Celebrities (I know you never met your girlfriend, but she’s great at IM. You fucking loser. Thanks for nothing).

I decided to make “K” an internet celebrity too but the “Fake Profile” stalker’s been using cuz he aint man enough to do it under his real shit has been shut down.

This has been a waste of time, but I hope you enjoy the pics- weirdo.

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The beauty of being a used up whore is that sometimes you don’t know if your pussy is still in tact or if it’s somewhere on the stage behind you. You know when you get a ravaging case of herpes it can either hurt like shit, or it can numb you junk – so that you don’t even know if it’s still there. Well, an appearance at for a Children’s Charity is always a good place to check, you trashy used up whore. That was for Fergie and I need to sleep, I am runnin off a 3 day binge. I was really not gonna bother updating – but I love you and had no choice. That’s what makes me your stepdad…now have a good sleep and I’ll drive you to soccer practice in the morning.

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They have disowned Paris for being a whore. The mother’s a shop-a-holic, trying r to deal with the loss of her daughter, Nicki’s happy she gets all the attention, so happy that she rocks “Fuck You” boots we know are directed at Paris, and Conrad is guilt ridden for getting a boner watching Paris suck cock like a 7 year old. That’s my story and this is the Hilton’s keeping up appearances for their x-mas card.(Just because they are rich, doesn’t mean they are jews like you.)

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