SFW Archives - Page 139 of 1169 Archive - DrunkenStepFather.com

2019

08

Aug

Salma Hayek Floatation Devices of the Day

Salma Hayek with her big rich tits…

Married to a billionaire, cuz she thinks she’s better than dating millionaires, since she’s got millions of her own from being the big titty Mexican actress in Hollywood that was criticized for not having ethnic people, OSCARS TOO WHITE…or whatever…..despite her being legit from the Corn Tortilla factory before making it to the big screen….a better life than running Tijuana Donkey shows, at least for her, not us, cuz we’d like to see her fucked by a Donkey and the fact she never will, because she won at life is sad….

We can watch her titties do some lifesaving work…keeping her safe and afloat…which I guess is better than nothing…barely better than nothing…cuz she’s old.

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Posted in:Salma Hayek|SFW

2019

08

Aug

Shailene Woodley Saving the Oceans of the Day

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Shailene Woodley is in the ocean with Green Peace picking up plastic.

I just hate her fucking face…..

I don’t even mind that she’s some hippie activist who is out there trying to save the oceans, or protest pipelines, as much as I hate the world, it’s really humanity that I hate, the world in and of itself is awesome, and disgusting humans are trashing it, so we need people like this to help save it..

But that face man….

I’ve watched her in the Big Little Lies show, I think it’s a Spinoff of Pretty Little Liars, you know when they grow up and kill their husbands….

I’ve watched her shipwrecked and sailing the world with her tits out in that other movie…

I even saw the movie she had cancer in…

That face just bothers me….

At least she’s in a bikini to offset that – I guess.

Save the fucking ocean, stop single use plastic, save the dolphins, do your part..or just look at her tits.

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Posted in:SFW|Shailene Woodley

2019

08

Aug

Charlotte Lawrence Bikini of the Day

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Charlotte Lawrence is another celebrity child, taking on the family business. Her dad a TV producer and her Mom Kate from Drew Carey show, which clearly had a lot of help in getting her to where she needs to be in terms of credits for IMDB thanks to the agents she grew up with…and her instagram whoring where she’s accumulating fans with her slutty pics…

I think this is the generation with the most celeb kids working in the industry…I mean back in the day there were Actor or celeb kids like Kate Hudson, or John Ritter, or Melanie Griffith, or Kurt Russel, or Jeff and Beau Bridges….or the Fondas…I mean I guess there was always a love for celeb kids and they’d get work from that nepotism, but there was a lot of new / fresh talent that would work its way into the industry….now, all that is out the window, why find new talent when we can ride off the celebrity of the parents to build their offspring into the next generation. It’s like 98 percent of talent is from Cali, born into industry family, and that’s prtty fucking lame….

So Charlotte Lawrence, who is not Jennifer Lawrence’s lesbian wife who took on her last name…but she’s equally hooked up and luckily, thanks to it being trendy, she’s got her slutty pics for social media down proper…and here they are…

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Posted in:charlotte lawrence|SFW

2019

08

Aug

Margaret Qualley Bikini of the Day

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Born to the actress Andie MacDowell, she trained as a ballerina and briefly pursued modeling. She gained recognition for playing a troubled daughter in the HBO mystery series The Leftovers and now she’s Quentin Tarantino’s comedy-drama Once Upon a Time in Hollywood

I wikipedia-ed her. I feel like a college kid working on my Thesis..you know cuz wikipedia is all you need to get buy as a bullshit no-it-all fuck….the amount of people that annoy me with their low level or top level knowledge about bullshit things that they try to school me in is high…and the only rebuttal needed is “i can wikipedia too, if you don’t believe me, read my Margaret Qualley post”…

Posted in:Margaret Qualley|SFW

2019

08

Aug

Cindy Crawford Bikini of the Day

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Cindy Crawford is clearly in Canada. I am from Canada so I have this ability to spot “home” when I seee it.

I also know that Cindy Crawford, along with Lisa Rinna have what the Canadians call “Cottages” in what the Canadians call “Cottage Country”….in Northern Ontario, not North Enough to house the murders they just found dead, but North Enough to be out of the hustle and bustle of the big Canadian cities that I assume have a population over 50,000 people..

Point being, these non-Canadians have moved in and bought up real estate in places most Canadians can’ afford to have cottages but likely wish they had cottages, jacking up the price of those Cottages and increasing the profile of those cottages, like Celebs did to Snowmass and other areas they decided to collectively Vacation…ruining the community cuz Celebs are scumbags and ruin everything..in the worst kind of gentrification but because they are celebs everyone gets excited and sucks their dick….even though they are destroying our natural resources….fuck them…we call them IGLOO Bandits…stealing our Maple Syrup….

Now…where’s her 18 year old daughter in the bikini, far more interesting than a 300 year old rich as fuck model I’d rather see in 20 year old pictures…wee don’t need none of this…

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Posted in:Cindy Crawford|SFW

2019

08

Aug

Gwyneth Paltrow Bikini with Dakota Johnson of the Day

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Gwyneth Paltrow is out on the beach with her ex Chris Martin and his new girlfriend Dakota Johnson. I wonder if Datkota Johnson was the girl who got second degree burns on her pussy from doing the GOOP vagina steam…..because she isn’t in her bikini and I figure burn victims don’t let getting their burn wounds wet…

Seeing families like this is creepy. You know the weird mom with her wellness blog that comes from a coddled, delusional, spoiled, rich person with too much time on her hands…and her queer Coldplay singer husband…and his new bitch – Melanie Griffith’s daughter all together and happy cuz I guess they are all rich together and by default laugh together at all the peasants they manipulate….exes are supposed to want to kill each other, this hanging out shit, is just annoying and a reminder of how fake all this trash is….

That said, here is Dakota Johnson and Chris Martin right after their attempted murder on a black family! It is a recent story I just heard about where no black people were killed by the White Supremicists who only targeted a black family to have an accident with, instead of a white one, in that critical time of “who do we run into”….”aim for the darkies”….kind of thing…but I doubt the internet hasn’t gone after them for that…instead they suck their dicks like Chris Martin sucks dick…cuz that is the world we live in, everyone praised for being great when clearly they are all scamming garbage…

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Posted in:Dakota Johnson|Gwenyth Paltrow|SFW

2019

08

Aug

Mariana Mendes Magalhaes Empowered Birthmark Model of the Day

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Mariana Mendes Magalhaes is some Brazian who apparently isn’t trans, but who has a big air patch on her fucking face, in what they are calling a “Birthmark” but is more like a curse or a sign of the devil on a child, in what would have been taken out back and killed as a baby had she been born a couple hundred years ago…

She isn’t hot to begin with, so I guess it’s good that she’s got that hairy patch, because it allows her model dreams to come true…

She’s the empowered hairy face girl…and the world must embrace her for her bravery in owning it, and they must give her a fucking career as a model she wants to be, even if it seems like it is pandering.

I don’t know about you, but I remember being in school with handicapped kids and I’d always let them win if we were competing against each other, or I’d help them if they were struggling, you know to feel better about terrorizing them the rest of the time…..I was a bully….and I just feel like giving a girl a career as a model cuz of a face deformity…is like some make a wish foundation in a “sure kid with cancer, you’re a fucking astronaut” or whatever….it’s almost cruel…and it’s totally fucking weird…but still something you’d probably want to cum on like it was her pubic hair because it may be her pubic hair…and I guess it’s still better than when a bitch has a moustache…even if it still makes my stomach curdle and gag.

Posted in:Mariana Mendes Magalhaes|SFW

2019

07

Aug

Alexis Ren Bolt Ons of the Day

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Alexis Ren is a reminder that anything is possible….from putting a man on the moon…to getting cast in lifestyle action and adventure soft core porn videos with some dude you are fucking….Free trips to all these great places in exchange for being in the videos….something she likely wanted before it ever started…then shit went viral, got her press, followers and now exists….

She’s been consistent with the nude or semi nude pics to keep her fans into her bullshit….all these years later, so many half naked pics of her body, which is a great body, that off-sets her crackbaby looking face…and I support that dream…cuz it involves this…not to mention it got her on TV, Dancing with the Stars despite not being a star…and it’s allowed her to go back to doing this half naked shit…where I guess she’s happiest cuz she likes being jerked off to, it makes here feel hot….and you likely think she’s hot cuz you’ve been fucking a sack of mash potatoes of a woman the last 2 decades..

Point being…fake tits, I assume fake ass, all this social media shit is fake…seeing these people in person is usually not exciting cuz they are all average as fuck and not photoshopped…seeing society turn to followers and photoshopping themselves like they run a magazine….seeing that no one has actual friends but live in a weird fantasy world…all weird shit….

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Posted in:Alexis Ren|SFW

2019

07

Aug

Bella Thorne Topless in Florida of the Day

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Bella Thorne the Dyslexic is in her home state of Florida promoting the book she “wrote” despite being an illiterate half retard raised on set cuz her mom whored her out fuck..

Her face is fucking mangled to shit, all kinds of injections, and seeing her in video reminds me of how annoying, unattractive and gross she is….

But she’s the hottest thing in Hollywood, an important actor with a powerful social media following, that I guess has psychologically fucked with her head the last few years, thanks to being a vulnerable young girl sold off to Disney who was already fucked in the head and her DIY attempt to be a MEDIA MOGUL that is working for her…she’s real dialed in…is annoying to watch…but she’s got good fake tits and she shows them off consistently so she’s worth watching despite all the disgusting that comes with her….especially when she speaks…

Not a fan, but willing to stare at tits. I have that ability. It’s a skillset I’ll put on my resume when I start applying for jobs again.

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Here’s her bikini – when in Miami – preview for tomorrow’s paparazzi pics..

Here is her almost nipple slip..

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

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Posted in:Bella Thorne|SFW

2019

07

Aug

Elisabeth Moss Almost See Through of the Day

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Elisabeth Moss is some troll bitch who we call “the nerd” because she just looks like a weird awkward bug eyed kid who is allergic to everything except Scientology…..she is a Scientologist..

I have SEEN handmaid’s tale…and I question how she got it, because I know anyone with money and in a position to find a fertile sex slave to make babies with – due to their society falling apart due to infertility thanks to pollution…they’d choose anything but this monster. This one belongs on the colonies fertilizing the radioactive LAND…yes…I have seen the show…

Anyway, thanks to that show, every time I see this monster fuck, it ends terribly for all involved…it’s like stay in the fucking house….or put a mask on…how can in an era of everyone getting plastic surgery did this fall through the cracks…probably thanks to her greasy troll skin…or maybe thanks to Scientology…despite looking like like a Science Experience…

The best description I’ve heard said about Elisabeth Moss is that she looks like a dermoid cyst…the cyst with hair and teeth…that survived, grew and learned how to speak…only to get cast in Mad Men….or whatever it is that launched her ugly monster career…

I’ve also heard her described as the cum and pubic hair stuck in the shower drain pulled out on cleaning day….but that morphed into a human due to some weird fertilization that happened and that crawled out of the dumpster and became an actor.

I have never heard her described as hot, something you’d fuck, but I know all you’d fuck her…you sick fucks…