DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2019

17

Sep

Alexis Ren Bolt Ons are Still Around of the Day

Aleix Ren bought some tits a while ago, and like JORDAN KATIE PRICE, made them as big as her body could handle. Almost clown like, with zero trying to pull a fast one on us, making us waste our time thinking are those real?, TOO ROUND TO CARE….

I guess she liked the way they filled out a bikini and how they’ve added to her creative vision…

Well, now she’s got the tits out….and I think there is nip….but it could just be dirt on my computer….I’m messy, fuck off.

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Posted in:Alexis Ren|SFW

2019

17

Sep

Bella Hadid Focus on the Tits of the Day

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BELLA HADID looking like Hillary Swank in Boys Dont Cry with her tit out for fashion…

This is just a reminder to any of the non-believers….the ones distracted by the bright lights like the moth fucks that you are…who buy into her hype…..maybe because you like her sister, maybe because her dad was your sugar daddy, maybe because you just think girls who people talk about are hot…it’s a fetish….that Bella Hadid is still the ugly girl she always was…the ugly duckling left out while her sister got all the attention…only to have had her model career bought.

This is also a reminder that tits and money can buy success. It takes money to make money and buy tits….

This is also a reminder that tits, no matter how much we pretend they don’t, can really get a girl far in life….cuz tits is all she has going for her and she’s gone far in life…so the laws of deduction is that she only matters cuz of her tits…and her money……

You know what I mean.

Posted in:Bella Hadid|SFW

2019

17

Sep

Bella Thorne On her Knees for a Bikini Butt Shot of the Day

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Bella Thorne is showing off the now trendy way to pose in a bikini. On her knees.

I guess this is inspired by porn girls rocking their private snapchats / cam sites…this pose is all too familiar…and seems trashy, sleazy and thus great….

A girl on her knees is a sexual image to you perverts….but you gotta keep in mind it’s also the way a girl prays when at church…therefore this may not be a product of the mainstream-ification of pornography….

I am convinced there will be a big going back to god like they were Bieber, Baldwin, Gomez and the Jenners….who live vapid and empty, morally disgusting lives, that leave a stain on society and that go against any and all moral code of society… but go to church cuz they are just that fucked up…

I think finding god will be a trend that will happen to all the IG girls after they stop getting naked, going TRANS, fighting #metoo shit, and pretending to be feminists with their tits out…

Or maybe the on your knees bikini post makes asses look rounder, fatter, cuz the heels push them out and up…and is a timeless pose girls are HYPED they can post without alienating the same people who hire them.

Who cares.

Posted in:Bella Thorne

2019

17

Sep

Alessandra Ambrosio Bikini of the Day

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Alessandra Ambrosio may be old, but modern science makes her 68% immune to that whole aging thing. Sure she will eventually end up looking like a muppet at some underfunded daycare, but as long as she stays skinny, fit, and half naked, we can handle that. Even as her ass starts to melt into itself, the cheeks slowly being sucked back into her, desite being an ass that likely has had ass injections, because all asses, especially menopausal asses have injections when they are trying to stay hot, marketable, and good enough to sell bikinis to random fans that should try to move onto the next model in line, the new blood….not the old athlete coming out to throw one last pitch desite all his injuries….cuz we all know how that soon to be retired cop ends up in all 90s cop movies….not good….but you are scared of change….so here it is…and when you look at them remember Carl Winslow Didn’t Die for This…

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Posted in:Alessandra Ambrosio|SFW

2019

17

Sep

Camila Cabello Erotica of the Day

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Camila Cabello is not making out with her rumored homosexual boyfriend, who I don’t think is actually a homosexual, since we live in the Chinese Year of the Homosexual and homosexuals are thriving.

Sure she may have learned this pose from her boyfriend’s GRINDER….where his bio is “HUNG”…and that he’s on PREP…you know to lure the RAW DOG BAREBACK….but the whole keep the gay dude pretending to be straight – keep in the closet is a thing of the fucking past. Teen girls don’t need the fanatasy that the popstar could date them in their imaginary world of TEEN HEART THROBS…..they’d be just as happy dreaming about them being their GAY BEST FRIENDS they shop and talk about boys with.

SO…I won’t called Mendes a closet case for marketing and this is his beard…but that’s what the story is so you can decipher it yourself as Camilla tries to get some male attention to make up for a boyfriend who doesn’t fuck her…

Here she is in some weird drag..

Here she is in some tight leggings..

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Posted in:Camila Cabello|SFW

2019

17

Sep

Katie Price Naked of the Day

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Here’s a little update on Katie Price and her new tits she loves to show off – because they are hilarious and amazing and huge…

Well, as it turns out the bandages are off of her tits, so there’s that….and they are now in a MESH top…so there’s that….I mean how do you make a news story around a set of silly tits.

Katie Price is the legend Glamour Model JORDAN…who got famous for having silly fucking clown tits….the way breast implants are supposed to be. I always say to all the girls that get breast implants to go big or go home, not that I talk to girls, they think I am weird, but you know what I mean….and that is that why get fake tits to look real that are fake….and that everyone knows are fake…who are you trying to fool with your titties…

I think the key is to use them for what they are…a new accessory, like a new car, be as big and flashy as you can, you paid for them…and that’s what fucking matters..

This subtle implant thing is some modern instagram filter so you fill out a bikini or whatever…but the true meaning of IMPLANTS on some mid 90s shit is Katie Price ….follow her lead.

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Posted in:Jordan Katie Price

2019

17

Sep

Dora Madison Burge Fetish Erotica of the Day

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Dora Madison Burge is back with the slutty content because acting isn’t enough for these people, they need to get half naked cuz it is fun and easy to get noticed, and when noticed you can get more acting jobs – so it’s all one big hamster wheel of success..a winning formula so easy to figure out if you’re into being a exhibitionist, which you probably are if you chose an acting career….and the plus side to getting noticed is making more money, finally mattering to an audience size you crave and most importantly getting off knowing some pervs out there are getting off to you.

The internet has allowed us, the PUBLIC to be the casting couch once reserved for the WEINSTEINs….now we all get in on the action and adventure. Seeing what it really takes to take on HOLLYWOOD as a serious contender.

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Posted in:Dora Madison Burge|SFW

2019

17

Sep

Sarah Hyland Bikini of the Day

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Sarah Hyland is in a bikini, there’s some weirdness going on in her crotch in at least one of the pictures.

She is not doing a beach clean up – or defending the environment like some kind of Captain Planet motherfucker, but she is wearing a plastic visor for fashion, which likely destroyed it’s fair share of the environment to get produced and it will likely end up in the fucking ocean she’s soaking her Kidney Transplanted pussy in.

As weird as her face has been over the years, you know looking like a giant toddler into her 20s, only to now look like a 60 year old, missing all that inbetween years….the body is small, skinny, tight, possibly dying of a terminal illness and that in and of itself is worth staring at while it lasts, before it’s too late, etc.

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Posted in:Sarah Hyland|SFW

2019

17

Sep

Shailene Woodley Tits of the Day

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Shailene Woodley is saving the fucking world, one bikini pic at a time, because it is not sensational half nudity for attention when it comes with activism and a cause….

Her cause is cleaning up the ocean of single use plastics….her method is to skin dive to retrieve as much plastics as she can while the real method is to get that bikini pic….cuz bikini pics are really what it is about.

Generating attention to save the fucking world, even though all reports are that it’s too fucking late to bother, humanity will be extinct, we are gonna die – so I’m glad you’re sitting at work slaving away for the man in your final enough days…

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Posted in:SFW|Shailene Woodley

2019

17

Sep

Brooke Candy Nipples of the Day

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Brooke Candy is the first stripper that I know of who turned to shitty internet rap the hipsters loved – before HIPSTER was mainstream and everyone was doing it….

She was the basis or foundation of the IGGY AZALEA character that was created through fake asses and fucking black dicks.

People thought she was edgy, or interesting, and it wasn’t even that long ago…but I guess nothing was THAT long ago, our lives are short and miserable even when they are long…100 years…that’s barely any time…and most of us die by 80….

Point being, to stay edgy, she posts shit like this, her body all marked up by what could be a retarded kid with a marker she fucks, or prison tattoos.

I never bought into anything she did, I never found it cool or interesting. I always though tit was attention seeking and trash….and I was right….but she’s still out there trying to get noticed tits out on INSTAGRAM..

Here is her audition to become the next BTK victim….you know Beth Ditto got a career revival in the new Kirsten Dunst show, why not Brooke Candy…