DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2019

27

Aug

Sarah Hyland Kidney Scars of the Day

Sarah Hyland bringing some new fetishes to the table in this one….some Coachella from 5 years ago body jewelry to accent her face that used to look like a 10 year old, all bloated and weird, but in her older age looks like an 80 year old with too much BOTOX, but more interestingly, the Kidney Transplant scars, cuz she’s had two Kidney transplants, like a fucking beast with faulty organs…which apparently is a thing in Hollywood, for whatever reason, because Selena Gomez had one too…maybe some child star damage from being sold to the industry / DISNEY at a young age where executives violated them via thier URETHAS…the gateway to the KIDNEY….who knows…

But I do know that Sarah Hyland’s got some bikini top on, cuz she likes that whole half nakedness….and at least she’s not fat, probably part of that genetic disorder that makes it hard for her to gain weight, a blessing to those of us staring at this weirdo creature.

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Posted in:Sarah Hyland|SFW

2019

27

Aug

Charlotte Lawrence Slutty of the Day

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The funniest thing about Charlotte Lawrence to me, is that I used to watch her mom on Caroline in the City…about some bullshit cartoonist in the city, the prequel to Sex and the City…I guess…..why the fuck would I ever watch that shit….well the answer is pre-cable we had limited choices….and we still watched the limited choices cuz it was better than doing more productive things with our time…

THAT said, as it turns out, a little GOOGLE corrected me….and reminded me that Charlotte Lawrence isn’t the daughter of the girl in THAT show, she is the daughter of the girl in the Drew Carey show….who I guess is substantially more famous….and thus her kid is substantially more bratty, entitled, spoiled, whilst doing social media bullshit…with her nipples out…paving a career for herself instead of just taking her spoiled brat trust fund and chilling…cuz girl has an ego that needs to be massaged…and ego for being the daughter of Kate from Drew Carey…which in and of itself is a weird ego to have but I don’t have a famous relative to mooch off of, or to name drop when I try cutting the line at hard to get into night clubs, so I can’t relate – but I can star at her nipples…that aren’t as exciting as RITA ORA NIPPLE.…but are probably less used and abused….

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Posted in:charlotte lawrence|SFW

2019

27

Aug

Candice Swanepoel Bikini of the Day

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Candice Swanepoel is so fucking boring….even when half naked. I don’t think it’s me hating on her for being perpetually pregnant and thus becoming a shell of who she once was, no one likes mom pussy as much as fresh pussy, it’s a fact.

I think it has more to do with her doing the same half naked bikini shit for over a fucking decade….that has inspired thousands if not millions of girls on social media to do the same bikini shit pictures…with the same poses…that when I see a bitch with her pursed lips looking over her shoulder half naked…i have no choice but to hate her.

TRUST ME… I get the simplistic marketing of half naked girls to get audience in. I have run this site on that model for the last 15 years…not that we are an EBAY or anything…or that we are a we even…it’s a shitty blog…I get it…but at one point in time 200,000 people a day were coming through to look at tits…they didn’t stick around so they clearly canceled me, or didn’t ready my beautiful prose…PROVING my fucking point…girls in bikinis doing anything is worth looking at..

I would just prefer if the bikinis were pulling some kind of stunt, or bring someting original to the mix.

Oh look, another bitch in a bikini posing like a fucking drag queen in the 90s….playing their best fashion model…oh and it’s Candice Swanepoel…who we saw at 19 looking god in a bikini, no need for her to now be in a bikini…the South African, racist by definition…is fucking old, tired, a mom, and sucks.

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Posted in:Candice Swanepeol|SFW

2019

27

Aug

Jennifer Lopez Titty Tape of the Day

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Jennifer Lopez with the titty tape, or the weird sticker bras that these whores on instagram, like the most gutter of whores on instagram were pushing for a minute….you know so that they don’t get those pesky bra straps in the way of their slut outfits, while they don’t show off their tits even though we are in the free the nipple era, maybe due to being insecure about the birthing process that may have destroyed her tits, assuming she’s a breast feeding mom, when I assume she’s more a pass the kids onto the help so that she can focus on her career and piling up all that money, so she can live a disgusting life in excess while looking down on peasants and poor people, as she sells them her garbage music…and movies…and storyline…

It’s easy to hate celebrities, especially J.Lo, who worked to be this person idiots fawn over and think is important, without realizing that she’s no different than you, except for some ego, willingness to manipulate men into becoming J.Lo…and rolling with it.

It’s also easy to hate on all the people who talk about J.Lo and her BOTOX look as some achievement in aging…when she’s got all the money and time and staff to focus and invest into her looks which in and of itself is as fucking vile and disgusting as you’d expect her to be….

People are so self involved….buying shit they don’t need cuz they can…and to not show us her tits, but instead to focus on her Kardashian looking face…is a real fuck you to all of us…

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Posted in:Jennifer Lopez|SFW

2019

27

Aug

Aubrey O’Day Erotica of the Day

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Aubrey O’Day is pretty fucking funny in her marketing of herself…

It’s like she disappeared for a decade, only to come back with a fake face, fake ass, fake everything….all while remaining equally irrelevant to what she once was…which is always funny to see. You know a girl who fucking tries this hard to sexualize herself in smut that she’s producing, even if she’s in her 40s or near 40s, she’s putting her ass out there like people want to see it, only no one cares because they realize that so many other girls on the internet are equally slutty, way younger, way hotter and way more interesting to jerk off to….where as some girl who had a minute of fame and made some money and who has met important people has this delusion that she fucking matters..that she’s more important than these other hot girls and that is fucking crazy….

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Posted in:Aubrey O'Day|SFW

2019

27

Aug

Barbie Ferreira Topless of the Day

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Barbie Ferreira is the big girl on the HBO show Euphoria….where she plays a slutty, insecure fat girl who is finding her sex appeal by being an underage cam girl dominatrix, which may be an actual thing high school girls are doing, that isn’t being policed aggressively, cuz underage girls go to night clubs, why wouldn’t they have fake ID that gets them on cam sites jacking off…

That said, apparently, this girl wasn’t always a fat pig of a girl, who I guess got fat so that she’d get some roles, I guess the media needs South American girls and fat girls to properly, now that the America media wants to properly represent every ethnicity, ailment, disability, allergy, sexual orientation….which is something Canadians are used to, that’s always been the way it is in Canada…thanks to shows like degrassi, that ALWAYS had the natives, asians, black, Wheelchair Bound, down’s syndrome, trans get-along gang shit…but that is funny to see when used sexually like they are in Euphoria with girls like Barbie Ferreira….who funny enough got her career started as an American Apparel model….fuck yeah.

Here she is before she got as big as she is now… is the conspiracy that she got fat to get roles I don’t know…

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Posted in:Barbie Ferreira|SFW

2019

27

Aug

Chanel West Coast Nipples of the Day

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Chanel West Coast fucking sucks.

She isn’t 40, but she must be close to 40….and the fact she still exists on the internet, people still talking about her, is a testament to sucking the right dick at the right time.

She got on an MTV show when people watched MTV and it translated to social media….So she didn’t start at zero on IG…trying to figure out how to be slutty enough to not get deleted while still being relevant….she already had that relevance in the form of followers who don’t actually care about her but who are waiting for the next titty pic….

That her shameless social media content has guaranteed level of views cuz people are there, but she still needs to give them something to talk about because no one actually cares about her and follow her for a more passive reason, like because they thought she was entertaining on the MTV show..and are waiting for the tits…

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Posted in:Chanel West Coast

2019

27

Aug

Instagram Nudity of the Day

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I figured I’d do a follow-up to the Morning Hangover Dump of the Day by expanding on the very important header image that I reported on Instagram and that instagram said was perfectly fine for their community, so as this girl gets more and more followers for posting porno like this, and turns that into money and luxury trips, it reminds us that the publicly traded company is a fucking porno site….it may not be a hardcore porn site, and you could argue that everything is porn to the right person, it does have a mass amount of jerk off material for you and Zuckerberg to jerk off to, while he watches you…through your computer camera….

Sick fucks.

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Posted in:Featured Post

2019

27

Aug

Drunk Gymnast and Other Videos of the Day

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How a Waiter Gets Rid of Drunk Guests

Driving on a Broken Bridge

Dude Mad there are no CHicken Sandwiches

Woman Man There are no Milkshakes

Riding a Bull…

Raging at McDonald’s Worker

Roof Collapse

Tranny Kicked Out of a Restaurant

Posted in:stepNEWS|Videos

2019

27

Aug

Morning Hangover Dump of the Day

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This Picture Doesn’t Go Against Instagram Terms and Services.

I saw a stripper looking girl with her monster sized fake tits and a pair of short shorts that matched her mangled face injection face – buying luggage at a Marshalls…

My initial thought was that I guess getting ready to make the great escape from the abusive boyfriend / pimp…she finances with her lap dances…

But then I realized that was pretty negative of me, to think she’s some battered whore…when she could very well be a whore who made the move to Sugar Baby and is on her way off to some Instagram friendly vacation with some rich dude who likes owning stripper looking bitches….

Here are some stepLINKS….in the morning..

Richard Pryor Put a Hit on Someone
CLICK HERE

Seven Ways to Survive a Shark Attack
CLICK HERE

Was it Self Defense?
CLICK HERE

Angelina Jolie Brought her Kid to College…
CLICK HERE

Evolution of the Aerial Dogfight
CLICK HERE

Retired Cop on Police Brutality
CLICK HERE

Bella Hadid Slutty
CLICK HERE

Kid Hits Half Court Shot to Avoid Ticket…
CLICK HERE

The Good People at Evil Corporation Johnson & Johnson to pay 572 Million for their part in the Opioid Crisis.
CLICK HERE

Clueless Dude Busted in Undercover Sting
CLICK HERE

Barbara Palvin – Numero
CLICK HERE

Rams and Broncos Brawl
CLICK HERE

==

This is the MIRACLE
CLICK HERE

Posted in:stepLINKS