DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2019

30

May

Jennifer Lopez Pussy Sweat of the Day

Jennifer Lopez….or as I like to call her – Soggy bottom boy – is like most menopausal women, at least from what I’ve learned watching Whoopie Goldberg on the View, which involves losing control of their bladders, peeing themselves when they laugh, that kind of thing….incontinence but not willing to wear one of those pee pads they advertise on TV cuz it will make her cunt look weird in her spandex….

In denial about getting old, willing to walk around like she pissed herself to continue that denial…or maybe she’s got some kind of infection…from all the years of being banged out…and is not her pissing herself at all.

Or maybe A-Rod busts in her so hard and so much cuz she’s a pervert tyrant slut who needs her pussy filled to decompress and it’s just pouring out of her…

Or maybe it’s just good old fashioned pussy sweat…from a hot day, or in J.Lo’s case, maybe it’s just ass sweat, cuz her ass is so big, and has extra sweat glands to keep her lubricated enough for anal sex….

Either way…I bet you’d like to drink a cup of it….cuz it’s full of stem cells and other things she’s been eating to stay youthful to make more money despite being old and having enough money…

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Posted in:Jennifer Lopez|SFW

2019

30

May

Cara Delevingne and Ashley Benson Sex Swing for Attention of the Day

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Gutter, bruised up, probably on Opiates, over hyped, over paid, Cara Delevingne and her fake, maybe real, who fucking knows they are all fucking perverts….who love to play it up for the paparazzi, to celebrate their lesbianism, their quirky friendship, cuz they love the media attention…are out there with a new stunt…

Walking into their house, bruised legs, with Benson’s big fat girl back, carrying a sex town, sex swing, thing to use to smash their pussies into each other’s faces, in a shameless, empowering, sex positive kind of way that is 100 percent designed as an LOL on the media….

Whether they use it or not, we don’t even know if these dykes even fuck, or if it’s all a joke…but we do know that Cara is a pussy eater, we also know she’s leveraged her pussy eating like she’s leveraged her family money, to be considered an actual model, despite not being hot….cuz that’s how the internet works…troll them all and if you’re lucky you win….and I guess this is winning…

This is not just living their casual lesbians in love life…this is pulling a stunt…cuz I guess they both love being talked about in an era when people stopped caring about either of them.

Pretty fucking ugly the two of them…but at least Benson’s stopped her over eating…and replaced it with hipster model pussy eating I guess….

Terribly fucking average….sex swings for real or for jokes or not…

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Posted in:Ashley Benson|Cara Delevigne

2019

30

May

Romee Strijd Bikini of the Day

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Romee Strijd is hot

Romee Strijd may have a stupid name…but she’s hot….and hot gets you what you want out of life…

She may be one of the many models Leo DiCaprio pretended to fuck because he’s a homo.

She may be a Victoria’s Secret model, which means she’s very important as a model, because that is what they consider to be legit modeling, even if it is just promo modeling for a mall brand that is an evil corporation that sells Chinese sweatshop made garbage to the people at inflated prices……so they can afford to keep their roster of sluts that people think are important models…

She is unlike all the other models, which is pretty much every single girl in the world with an instagram, doing silly poses for the camera….because of VS…

So her bikini selfies are by default more IMPORTANT than you peasants….

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Posted in:Romee Strijd|SFW

2019

30

May

Top 10 Naked Girls on Instagram of the Day

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Here are 10 girls who got naked on Instagram – because they are artists and getting naked is their art….and instagram respects artists….especially nude artists…because it is empowering, feminist, and accounts for 80 percent of their pageviews – so find clever ways to keep it up and running…intellectualize it….we need to keep this porn coming so that people on instagram keep coming in more ways than just BACK TO THE SITE…if you know what I mean…

It’s a nice reminder that the world is a bunch of fucking perverts….

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Posted in:Featured Post|SFW|Top 10

2019

30

May

Tallulah Willis Tit of the Day

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Talula Willis at it again, remember her pussy dance?

She’s one of the hipster daughters of Demi and Bruce – who isn’t RUMER Willis….

She normally poses naked with her sister SCOUT, but I guess SCOUT was busy spending her allowance shopping that day…

Tallula Willis and Scout Willis have figured out a hook to get people talking about them, or at least to fuck with the media who pay attention them – by getting naked together – which in their Hippie upbringing wasn’t a big deal…..not that they are actual hippies..they are rich as fuck, raised rich as fuck, but for some reason think they are down to earth..

Maybe it’s thanks to the way their stepfather Ashton Kutcher – the girlfriend killer usd to tuck them in at night….

Or maybe it’s just a who gives a fuck we’re rich attitude….who know they only matter cuz of their parents and who play it up accordingly…

I don’t have the answers – but what I do know is that I’ve spent far too much time talking about Tallulah Willis…it’s just a fucking selfie and it’s not nearly hot enough to jack off to.

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Posted in:SFW|Talula Willis

2019

30

May

Britney Spears Slutty of the Day

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Britney Spears trying to prove she is in control of her own life..through slutty instagram content that I am going to assume was shot months ago as filler content for when they have her locked in a cage in a padded room – decompressing or being brain washed and hyped into doing another world tour or Vegas residency for her family to take all the money from….

She’s a white trash, sold by her parents to the farmer down the street when she was 14, only the farmer down the street happened to be the entertainment industry….

She’s been publicly abducted in plain site for the last decade or so – thanks to the K-Fed head shaving experience, so bitch can’t make any decisions on her own…everything runs through her dad…and the public just stood by and watched and danced along to Hit Me Baby One More Time….despite the cries for help…

But now she’s back, or pretending to be back with slutty content and since she’s still fucking hot, I have a thing for the imprisoned types….it just makes her that much better.

Britney Forever!

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Posted in:Britney Spears|SFW

2019

30

May

Azealia Banks Nipples of the Day

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Azealia Banks, the rapper bitch who kills chickens in her apartment cause she’s a fucking weirdo who spent some time in Canada where she met her DJ music partner who I’ve heard said she’s a wild one…is out there with her bolt on tits.

She’s already been naked, she’s done Playboy so they are tits we know….and probably avoid cuz they are always involved in the dumbest scandals involving Elon Musk, Grimes, Iggy Azalea…pretty much anyone she can call out…she calls out…which I guess can be appreciated if you care about this low level celebrity thing…I prefer to just look at the tits and encourage the posting of the tits cuz they are tits.

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Posted in:Azealia Banks

2019

30

May

Ashley Tisdale Ugly Watch Continues of the Day

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Ashley Tisdale is so damn ugly…

So here’s some pics of her vagina eating her pants, cuz as a people, or maybe it’s as a collective of perverts, we like seeing vaginas eating pants….the pussy definition, especially on girls who aren’t moms yet and who only have banged out pussies from the execs at Disney who put her on the map, are far less of a scary thing…than Ashley Tisdale’s face…

I used to do a series of posts when she was on High School Musical..where I would basically say “yep, still ugly”…and then the whole nose job thing happened, and she looked even worse, all while Disney positioned her as hot…

I figure nostalgia is in, I can’t believe I’m on my 15th year of blogging tits, with nothing to show for it…so we’ll do an UGLY WATCH continues for old times.

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Posted in:Ashley Tisdale|SFW

2019

30

May

Christina Aguilera Slutty Hipster Shoot to Stay Relevant of the Day

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Christina Aguilera looking like an old Hollywood tranny or drag queen…just the way you like her cuz you have that tranny fetish, but you don’t like to admit it, and if anything you like women who look like men, when you know she wasn’t actually born with a dick…

There was a time when she was a hot skinny chick…and not an old hag of a mom….but she is still vain and done up…just not vain enough to stop the fucking chowing down on the food cuz she’s a fatty…..maybe less fat than she’s been but still too fat….

It’s one of those hot chicks who get fat find fat liberating in a “Who gives a shit kind of way”…even though we all give a shit…we liked you little….

This is a shoot for a hipster mag, she’s a little slutty for 40, tits and ass out, licking disco balls, etc, like some GAY ICON but still looks good to me….but in my defense I’ve always been an X-Tina fan and at one time bet someone I would have sex with her in my lifetime, which is highly unlikely but could happen if I tried hard enough….but I’m not ready to murder / suicide…

She’s Christina Aguilera…staying young and hip in photoshoots despite being old.

Posted in:Christina Aguilera|Christina Aguilera

2019

30

May

Libby Mills and Tasmin Howells Double the Instagram Nudity of the Day

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I like when random girls on the same mission of getting naked on social media link up and do what they call a SHARE FOR SHARE in the form of producing content together like they are part of a sisterhood or sorority of getting naked on the social media platforms to get attention, noticed, an audience, maybe a famous boyfriend or an excuse to move to LA to live it up with the other girls who get naked on social media for the same reasons, where they can continue to express themselves through nudity with other girls to build up that profile and FUCKING win hard enough to start a t-shirt company and only sell 35 units to their fans cuz we’re here for the fucking tits bro…

I’ve never heard of TASMIN HOWELLS or Libby Mills but they are on the right track…this is what the kids are into and it’s great for us perverts who used to have such a hard time getting to see girls naked….young hot tight body girls naked…

The world is moving into the right place….

Posted in:Libby Mills|Tasmin Howells