I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2010

03

Mar

Kelis’ Performance Brought All the Boys to the Yard of the Day

I ordered a milkshake the other day cuz I am fat as fuck and when I told the girl to make sure it brings all the boys to the yard and she didn’t crack a smile and instead just gave me a dirty fucking look like that I was a lame old man who bbored her and offended her, so dirty I was pretty sure she wanted me to fucking die. That’s when I realized that maybe that song may have hit a farther back than I thought and maybe it was more of a one-hit wonder than anything memorable that would carry on for generations…or maybe it was just a tired joke she’s heard way too many times working there and that she now can’t help but hate anyone who tries to pull it off like a loser the person must be if they find it funny enough to say…

That said, I am not the only one milking the milkshake song, here is Kelis still milking it while slutting it up during a performance I approve of because no matter how ridiculous the bitch may look or be wih her stupid grey femmullet hair and awkard body….she’s still acting like a fucking whore on stage and I love fucking whores….if they don’t charge too much….

Pics via LFI

Posted in:Dirty|Kelis

2010

03

Mar

Some Pamela Anderson in a Gold One-Piece of the Day

These are pictures from a couple of weeks ago that you’ve probably already seen and that I may have already posted, but I am posting again, because I have a bad memory but also because seeing Pam Anderson’s sloppy Hep-C mom ass from this angle is just too funny for me to not post, you see because I used to find her hot and exciting when I didn’t know better, and I generally like a friendly reality check to remind me that life is pretty fucking shitty and all things come to an end because when your sexual fantasy is old and haggard it usually means so are you…

These came out because she’s doing some Dancing with the Stars bullshit, that will be fun to watch, like watching a trainwreck where no one dies and the only casualty will be her pride….

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Gold|One Piece|Pamela Anderson

2010

03

Mar

Lindsay Lohan Does Purple Magazine of the Day

Lindsay Lohan did a photoshoot for a magazine called Purple, which was only fitting because from what I’ve been told, her vagina is also purple cuz that’s what happens when you cut off the oxygen supply and die….I guess is trying to make it in the hipster art fag fashion world, so she’s been doing this sexual photoshoots for various hipster art fag fashion magazines and I’m all for it, because getting girls as slutty as possible with any spin you put on it is good enough for me, especially when it involves Lohan showing off her tits, something I’ve been missing in my useless internet for some time now….sure, it would have been more interesting to see these pictures back when Terry Richardson was interesting and trying to get noticed by taking pretty shocking erotic pics, back before American Apparel stole his point-and-shoot snapshot approach that he stole from so many people before him, because now he may be making the big money, but he just comes across as a tamer version of an American Apparel ad, but when it comes to Lohan with her panties halfway down her ass, I’ll take whatever I can get, even if shit was taken by a one-armed tap dancing austic midget with diabetes and a rash, if you know what I mean and I hope you do, cuz I have no idea what I am talking about….maybe I’m just trying too hard to be shocking and cool to break free from my dad but I like leave that up to Terry Richardson….

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|Purple Magazine|Terry Richardson

2010

03

Mar

Emily Blunt’s Ass in Her Leggings of the Day

I have no idea who Emily Blunt is. I know I’ve heard her name before but I am pretty sure I’ve never seen her in anything and not because I don’t watch movies or TV, but because according to her IMDB, she’s pretty much not even considered an actress and might as well be a fucking extra or the bitch that works for the caterer on set….or just some random bitch running errands who the paparazzi is confusing as someone important enough to take pictures of becuase her pants are jacked up her pussy like the Asian fitness girl I saw earlier today and that was far more exciting than these pictures because her pussy looked so small and inviting in those leggings, while this bitch just looks like some kind of primate….

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Emily Blunt|Leggings

2010

03

Mar

Phoebe Price Thinks She’s a Model of the Day

I still haven’t figured out what Phoebe Price does or who she is, but she’s got some serious fucking ego who thinks we actually care about what she does or who she is. The only thing I can assume about her is that she has orange pubic hair and I have a serious history with orange pubic hair that started with me gagging at the thought of orange pubic hair when I was a teenager, leading to me mocking every ginger I came across, until realizing that I was actually fascinated by the shit before giving it a chance and turning every ginger I came across against me, like my name and picture was sent out on some kind of ginger information network, so in all my years of fucking, I have never had a taste of it. I figure it’s just punishment from God for giving all those girls a complex when they were easily influenced, probably one bad enough to keep them totally shaved at all times, if they weren’t too awkward to fuck dudes until they were pushing 30 and only did it cuz the dude was also ginger, because I was an asshole who couldn’t appreciate something so unique and different and could that I’ve been banished from every stroking my fingers through….not that you care about my orange pubic hair fetish…but then again you don’t really care about Phoebe Price either….

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Phoebe Price|Runway

2010

03

Mar

Kim Kardashian’s Fat Ass and Tits of the Day

A week doesn’t seem to go by without pictures of Kim Kardashian going to get a pedicure while showing off her fat tits, fat ass and fat body because her life is fucking useless and she doesn’t do anything but go to get pedicures, go to events, go to dinner and sit at home emotionally eating her way thru life because that’s what pigs do. Her boring fucking life is like a CD on repeat, but instead of turning the bullshit off and just letting her live out her bullshit without bothering the rest of us, they give her a fucking TV show, which is one more reason why America is a cesspool of fucking shit, any normal society would have executed this trash, or let it die from its own stupidity, but instead you assholes celebrate it….and the whole thing is beyond me…Seriously, I just don’t get it….I really don’t….why is this thick bitch making money off of all of us?? It is not deserved and makes no sense…but here are her short thick legs and body wasting everyone’s time……

Pics via PacificCoastNews
Pics via Fame

Posted in:Ass|Fat|Kim Kardashian|Tits

2010

03

Mar

Salma Hayek’s Tits Do a Kids Show of the Day

I just had a conversation with someone about kid’s shows being really fucking creepy. We were talking about PeeWee’s Playhouse because he’s making some kind of masturbating in a porn theater comeback, and like everyone in the late 80s, I used to watch the shit, until recently being forced to watch it again, only to realize just how crazy it actually was. It was sexual, awkward and more than anything, pretty fucking insane.

So if you haven’t watched a kid’s show as an adult, you will be surprised how fucking cracked out the shit is, it’s like a bad porno without the sex but instead with creepy tree-hugging hippies singing songs about bullshit and characters only serious hard drug use could think up. It is high energy, I’m talking bouncing off the wall insanity that would normally leave a motherfucker institutionalized if he was to do it on the street corner at 3 in the morning..

Apparently Salma Hayek, an entited mother celebrity mother who decided to do something to excite her spawn decided to pull some strings to show her kid just how cool she actually is and she did it while showing off her tits, making all the kids watching it hungry for milk…and scarring their brain into thinking tit, wanting tit and never quite knowing why they are so tit obsessed until serious therapy unravels this moment 20 years down the line….

Pics via PacificCoastNews
Pics via LFI

Posted in:cleavage|Salma Hayek|Tits

2010

03

Mar

John Travolta’s Fly is Down of the Day

John Travolta went out to dinner with a male friend and left with his fly down….because he’s gay and like most gyas on the down-low they have to hide their true sexuality by getting married and becoming Scientologist, while really having secret meetings with their lovers for “Business”, when really they’re just jerking each other off in the restaurant bathroom. I saw brokeback mountain, I know how it works, cuz I know that smile doesn’t come from nowhere, especially when your handicapped son just died in his bathtub…fucking Scientologist….

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:Fly|Gay|John Travolta

2010

03

Mar

stepLINKS of the Day

Someone just told me that it is Spring Break for most people. That means somewhere at this moment, a college coed is getting gangbanged for the first time, or dying of alcohol poisoning for the first time, or getting her stomach pumped for the first time, while flashing her tits for the first time, and I am not around any of that excitement, I’m just sick in Canada, a fate worse than death. I guess there’s always next year, when I’ll be the almost 50 year old trying to get my flacid mound I call my dick to fit in as many passed out girls in their bikinis, but I keep telling myself that and it never comes true….what does always come true every night are my stepLINKS…

Courtney Love is Playing Jesus Dress Up or Some Shit and it Turns Me The Fuck On….
GO

Naomi Campbell Beat Down!!
GO

Because Pulling One Out is a Little Easier When You Have Some Help
GO

Joss Stone Goes Nude
GO

15 Truly Awful Celebrity Parents
GO

Vanessa Paradis is Fucking Smokin’
GO

Train Versus Flood, Holy Shit – VIDEO
GO

I Don’t Know Who Donna Air is, But Here’s Her Panties
GO

Is Keira Knightley Naked Under This Trenchcoat
GO

How Many Times Has This Happened To You – VIDEO
GO

Lesbian Class is in Session – VIDEO
GO

Find Girls to Fuck – Because Sex is a Two Person Activity
GO

I’m Not On For Feel Good Stories, But This Computer System That is Allowing Roger Ebert to Speak Again is Fucking Insane and I’m Happy For the Dude
GO

And Now, The House That 33DDs Built
GO

India Reynolds is Lookin’ Mighty Mighty Fine
GO

Okay, This is The Creepiest Russian Singer Weirdo dude Ever – VIDEO
GO

Little Wayne is Probably Never Going to Go to Jail
GO

Miley Cyrus Gyrating On Stage: So Wrong, But So Right – VIDEO
GO

Awhhh Lohan is Madd at The Paparazzi!
GO

Elizabeth Anne and Ariel Get It On
GO

Hayden Panty Airs is a Call Girl
GO

Ciara Has a Tight Body
GO

The Price of Persia Trailer For Those Who Care
GO

Use This To Get Sex..Because Sex is Fun
GO

Which One Would You Hit?
GO

Eve Longoria Down Dress Cleavage
GO

Amy Doesn’t Wait For Someone Else to Please Her
GO

Underwater Boxing Match – VIDEO
GO

Eliza Dushku
GO

Some Pam Anderson Add Was Bailed in Australia and Here It Is – VIDEO
GO

Who Knew Pigs Could Fly? – VIDEO
GO

Striptease of the Day
GO

Sammy Brady is Topless in a Thong
GO

Can She Do It All Herself? Yes She Can! – VIDEO
GO

Sofi and Kesedy at the Beach
GO

I Don’t Know Who Khia is, But She is Tweeting About Trina’s Nude Leaked Pics and It’s Hilarious
GO

Some Serious Fucking Booty…
GO

See Thru Shirt on an Everyday Girl….
GO

Follow Me Down the Road to Nowhere
FACEBOOK and TWITTER

Posted in:stepLINKS

2010

02

Mar

Victoria’s Secret Models with Cutouts of the Day

Look you’re not the only one with lifesize cutouts of Victoria’s Secret models. You’re just the only one who fucks those lifesize cutouts….

Here are a couple Victoria’s Secret models in some seriously ill-fitting pants that make me think they are substitute teachers from the 80s, or working a church fundraiser, or my friend’s mom who used to love Khakis no matter how fat she got…what a fucking disappointment only shaped liked Alessandra Ambrosio and Rosie Huntington-Whiteley and not a middle aged short fat white trash woman with no taste who liked Tuna Casserole…..They really need to start dressing these bitches up like they do in photoshoots for all public events.

Pics via LFI

Posted in:Alessandra Ambrosio|Rosie Huntington-Whitely|Sex Dolls|Victoria's Secret