I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2009

15

Jul

Ines Sastre and Her Mom Nipples on the Beach

Ines Sastre is some model turned actress from Spain who I doubt I’ve heard of, but have probably done posts on, but unfortunately I have a horrible memory and everything kind of blurs into one giant confused mess that is this site, but fuck, she’s got an amazing mom body, like the women I saw at 8:30 in the morning today while still drunk, only they were wearing their business casual outfits and not one-piece bathing suits to cover their mom stretch marks with ass hugging skirts/dresspants and button down blouses that were almost sheer, making me want to get a office job in the cubicle next to them, even though I could tell in their exhausted eyes that they hated how life played out for them, just enough depression needed to convince them to fuck me in the copyroom after gaining their trust. Unfortunately for me, I hate office jobs and would never sacrifice freedom for pussy, especially pussy I know wouldn’t actually give me the time of day, they just do that in my fantasies….

Posted in:Bathing Suit|Hot|Ines Sastre|Nipples

2009

15

Jul

Phoebe Price Stomach of the Day

Phoebe Price is lookin’ pretty doughy. I guess there’s nothing more magical than seeing a woman’s curves slowly morph into a boxy menopausal midsection, one that should be kept under wraps and saved for a surprise for the poor fucker who brings your ageless ass home to fuck one night when drunk, unsure of whether you are 25 or 60, but willing to cum inside you because not much else is goin’ on, but also because he clearly knows you don’t get your period anymore. This is some push-up bra shit, but on a whole other dry pussy, extremely emotional level and I still have no idea who this bitch is.

Posted in:Phoebe Price|Stomach

2009

15

Jul

Dannii Minogue for Old Times of the Day

Here’s is Kylie Minogues shadow or her sister who grew up in her shadow, who I guess has a stronger immune system than her, because she never got breast cancer like her defective older sister, thus making her the less interesting one to try to seduce and marry because that means has higher chances of survival than someone who is relapsing, because you’d only trying to get with her to live the good life gold diggin’ and not because you used to masturbate to her pop career over the years, not that any of that will ever happen, I just have nothing to fuckin’ say today, maybe I should eat lunch or even better…kill myself.

Posted in:cleavage|Dannii Minogue

2009

15

Jul

Ashley TIsdale Ugly Watch Continues of the Day

I wouldn’t care if Ashley Tisdale walked around with fucking her own vagina with her nose, she still couldn’t turn me on. Her face almost looks like she was in a trainwreck but survived, but I like to think it’s got more to do with her plastic surgeon, who was once at the top of his game, you know the guy all the celebs hired to do work on them, who was in a debilitating accident, losing his ability to perform surgeries properly, but making everyone around him feel bad that a master lost his craft, leaving them unable to tell him he’s lost his touch, leaving cunts like Tisdale lookin’ more like cartoon character and no matter how short those shorts get, I can’t see past that face, but maybe you can.

Don’t get me wrong, I’ve banged ugly girls, but at least they didn’t walk around thinkin’ they were hot just because they were on some Disney show.

Posted in:Ashley Tisdale|Ugly

2009

15

Jul

Lindsay Lohan and Sam Ronson Porn of the Day

The other day, I was talking to a girl and the conversation turned to porn, as it often does with me. Not because I actually like porn, but because people just assume I am the worst porn site on the internet and label me as a porn site, because porn is the only thing that supports what I do, while mainstream is too pussy to show me some love.

We were talking about what porn that I would produce porn would be like and one of us suggested that I do Hannah Montana porn starring her, and I thought the whole thing was a great ideal, until I realized she was 14 and creeped the fuck out because some random dude started chatting her up allegedly asking her to star in Hannah Montana porn, but from what I remember it was all her doing, but try convincing the cops of that….

Either way, Hustler beat me to the parody shit and produced this Lohan/Ronson shit that isn’t really believable, but still pretty fuckin’ funny.

Here’s the hardcore Trailer…..

I believed this sex parody up until the second I saw Sam Ronson in a pair of women’s panties, everyone knows that she wears boxers so all credibility went to shit, not to mention the “real” Lohan’s tits are far better than this slut, her vagina is far more weathered and used, her eyes are more glassed over/high, and her face isn’t so fresh faced which is kinda depressing when you’re being compared to a ghetto porn slut, but other than that I feel like I’m in some kind of other dimension where I can’t tell who is the real Lohan and who is the fake one….and I guess we all know what Ronson’s gonna be masturbating to while on the road.

Here are some pictures of the “real” Lohan the other day….

And some more pictures of the “real” Lohan

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|Porn|Sam Ronson

2009

15

Jul

Some 90210 Trash on the Beach Almost in Bikinis of the Day

The aspiring actors who are doing their training on the set of 90210 in some kind of paid internship were shooting on the beach, because they aren’t real actors yet, but they sure as hell are trying to be.

They weren’t wearing their bikinis, but Annalynne brought her monkey lookin’ ass out in something that shows off her skinny stomach, which is something some of you girls out there should look at closely then stand in front of a mirror to compare to what your stomach, to realize why she is on TV and you’re not, you fat piece of shit.

This Annalynne bitch proves everyday that you don’t have to have looks to get ahead, you just have to not be a fatass. So all you young girls take that in and think about it the next time you go out for ice cream you fuckin pigs. The only way a fat chick would get on 90210 would be to be made fun of by the skinny chicks and no one wants to be that girl.

Bonus – Here are other phony actors on the set of Gossip Girls trying to show the 90210 chicks up. They need to fight in a lesbian fisting death match….because Hollywood’s not big enough for this much talentless pussy…

Posted in:90210|Annalynne McCord|Beach|Bikini|Trash

2009

14

Jul

stepLINKS of the Day

I saw Bruno. It was uncomfortable. Not because I am a homophobe. Or because he gets himself in awkward situations. Or even because it was pretty much like watching Borat but because I had a boner the entire time. Maybe I’m gay like these girls or maybe I am just lying…on all fours…ready for you…mister man…truth is I think dude’s fucking insane…and I am all gayed the fuck out by seeing too much gay and the real discomfort in the theater was watching all the weird chachi dudes lookin nervously at each other cuz they liked what they saw and weren’t too sure how to incorporate a catch phrase from the movie into their everyday life while stayin’ macho…bro. There was no Wawawewa or Me Like or It’s Nice or whatever the fuck else they pulled from Borat and dropped in bars every fucking night for months and fucking months…and then there’s the whole Halloween shit we’re gonna have to deal with….everyone dressed like fuckin’ Bruno….like they did for Bruno so I guess that means it is just the fuckin’ beginning…all while Sasha Baron Cohen counts the fuckin’ benjamins….

Here are my stepLINKS.

John Plus His Whore Plus Viagra are Making Their Rounds Around the World
GO

Future Ex Wife Shows Off Her Clevage
GO

Selita Banks Makes High Heels Look Good – VIDEO
GO

Some UK Actress is Showing Off Her Tits
GO

There’s No Way This Harry Potter Kid Isn’t a Fag
GO

Hot//Sweaty//Sexy
GO

Barely Legal: The 10 Hottest 90s Babies
GO

Some Amazing French Canadian sluts at some radio station beach party.
GO

Legendary footballer Gazza’s daughter takes her clothes off for ZOO
GO

This is a Busty Fucking Young Girl….
GO

This World of Warcraft Kid is Really Getting Out of Hand… – VIDEO
GO

HOw About a T & A Party
GO

5 Terribly Awesome Examples of Porn Acting
GO

She Used to Have a Wang, But Yeah I’d Still Bang Her
GO

Striptease of the Day
GO

Sandra Bollock and I Both Agree That She Should Get Naked Again
GO

Find Girls to Fuck – Because Sex is a Two Person Activity
GO

She May Be Desperate, But I’d Still Bang Jennifer Aniston
GO

You Know I’m Not So Into Pregnant Chicks, But I Gotta Say Adriana Lime is Looking Hot
GO

Diana and Deluna Get It On
GO

Rosario Dawson, Will You Marry Me?
GO

Surprise!! One of the Cunts on Big Brother is a Racist Fuck – VIDEO
GO

How About some Alessandra Ambrosio
GO

Dannii Minogue Gallery
GO

Katy Fey is in Stockings
GO

Nipple Slip Compilation
GO

A Scary, Scary Pole Dance
GO

Brooke Likes to Play With Herself
GO

And The Stupidest Idea of the Day Goes To…
GO

Christian Bale Must Be a Real Good Actor, Cause he Seriously Looks Like a Crackhead
GO

De-Robed on TV – VIDEO
GO

Karolina Kurkova is Pregnant
GO

Liv Tyler is Pretty Hot When She Wants to Be
GO

Use This To Get Sex..Because Sex is Fun
GO

Back Yard Orgy
GO

Eleonora is a Joy
GO

Hot Chicks on Roller Blades Are All sorts of Awesome
GO

Violet Gets Naked Just For Fun
GO

Hole in One for Marketa
GO

Demi Jessica is a Playboy Babe
GO

An Afternoon Pick Me Up
GO

I Hope for The Sake of Everyone Janet Jackson Gets Custody of Michael’s Kids
GO

She’s Got a Secret Admirer
GO

And You Thought The Sluts You Knew Were Good…
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS

2009

14

Jul

Carmen Electra, Kim Kardashian and Pam Anderson Doing Some Burlesque Shit….of the Day

This video is annoying but you can see Carmen Electra in a thong, or Kim Kardashian dressed like a slutty sailor. I think the whole pinup burlesque shit is designed for fat, ugly girls who can’t make it as real models, but Carmen Electra is still hot even though she’s old. Kim Kardashian not so much…

Posted in:Burlesque|Carmen Electra|Kim Kardashian|Pam Anderson

2009

14

Jul

Ridiculous Booty Video of the Day

The world needs more ridiculous booties. I don’t know who this girl is but she’s a fucking pig and it’s so fucking disgusting that I want to violate it in ways I shouldn’t then throw up on the fucking thing while watching it slap up against my fuckin’ belly…

Posted in:Booty Video

2009

14

Jul

Andrea Bocelli and Veronica Berti on the Beach of the Day

It seems like kind of waste that a blind dude would be engaged to a body like this considering he can’t actually see her and doesn’t have to stare at her face all fucking day. I always thought ugly chicks were designed for the blind and the whole reason blindness existed was to give disgusting bitches hope, but throw in some fame, money and a voice of an angel, and all of a sudden his disability becomes totally irrelevant and she can see past it, while he can’t see past much, but at least has a some hot tits and a fat ass to play with and here she is in a bikini….

Sure girls in bikinis are exciting, at least more exciting than girls fully clothed, I mean depending on the girl, because no matter how perverted I am, there is some pussy I like to keep off fuckin’ limits because seeing it is bad for my fuckin’ soul. But I find the whole bikini thing a little played out and I am only a new fetish and that’s getting down to 1920s style bathing suits but that’s just cuz I used to jerk off to my granny’s vacation pics when I would spend my summers with her as a 12 year old boy discovering myself…..I mean, Damn these are some hot pics….

Posted in:Andrea Bocelli|Beack|Bikini|Veronica Berti