I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2009

21

May

Rock And Roll Daddy Issues and Wallet Fucking of the Day

Ronnie from the Rolling Stones is dating some 18 year old Russian chick. Now this could really be true love, despite being fucking awkward as shit, you know with him having a Peter Pan complex since he never had to grow up and made his millions being drunk, high and irresponsible, and he only relates to 18 year olds. Or maybe it’s because after years of fuckin’ groupies, whores, sluts, models, celebrities, everyone, he realizes that 18 year old pussy is the best kind of pussy.

I am pretty sure she’s not in it for the same reason, you know she isn’t fucking him because his weathered scabby dick is all she ever wanted in a fuckin’ dick, and his death ridden body is the body she’s always wanted, but her motivation probably stems from being Russian and wanting out of that shit, or maybe she just likes being held because her dad never held her, but I’m thinkin’ it’s got more to do with a retirement plan.

Let’s face it, this motherfucker’s loaded to the tits and probably won’t be alive much longer, so if she can be his personal whore the next 5 or 6 years, which isn’t so bad, she just gets to travel the world, going from high end hotel to villa to rockin’ the fuck out every fucking night, which is a pretty good deal as is, but a better fucking deal when she inherits a whole lot of Russian Rubles.

Fuck I’d dress like a fuckin hipster lesbian and let him jerk off on my tits everynight before bed because I have no shame.

Posted in:Rolling Stones|Russian

2009

21

May

Britney Spears Cleansing Her Abortion Vagina of the Day

I was emailed anonymously by someone who works at an abortion clinic, or who claims to work at an abortion clinic, where Britney Spears had an abortion the last couple of days. The reason was because she didn’t know who the baby daddy was and now she’s taken a couple weeks off to relax, recover and get her shit together.

The reason she’s acting wild on tour, fucking all the random cock she can, is because her dad has her by the abortion vagina, or as I like to call it her death trap, she’s on a short fucking leash and she’s been trying to escape him.

Her cellphone was taken away because she was calling friends to kidnap her from the hell she’s living. I can only assume it is going to end in a bloody murder as it is her only way out of this court order control.

The reason he’s got a tight fucking leash on her is not because he needs it for his dental bills because he pretty much crawled out of a Louisianna Bayou but because she finances all his business ventures that fail and he needs to keep the flow of cash comin’ in and the whole think is almost sad, except for the whole fact that she pretty much won the lottery when she was a kid and this is just what comes with selling your soul to the devil.


I wasn’t Allowed to Post the New Bikini Pictures So To See Them – Follow This Link
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Posted in:Abortion|Britney Spears

2009

21

May

Christian Audigier on a Boat of the Day

You wanna know what this is a picture of? A motherfucker giving all you fucking assholes the fuckin’ finger. He is laughing that such a stupid concept like a tattoo on a t-shirt can turn into a fucking revolution where every fucking Chachi from Los Angeles to Middle America to fuckin’ Europe and Australia are rockin’ his shit and paying huge money for it. We’re talking paying 200 dollars or more for a 3 dollar t-shirt, a fuckin t-shirt you fucking assholes, and now the cocksucker is popping fuckin’ bottles on yachts because of it, since he’s the master fucking manipulator and you are just a fucking idiot buying bottle service, throwing napkins at the crowd, screaming Bob Sinclair at the top of your fucking lungs, when dumpin goose on idiot girls with fake tits who hang with you because they think that kind of shit is cool, all in your 200 dollar t-shirt and I hate all you

On the positive side on things, because let’s face it, we can’t hate on everything, at least this asshole is as lame as his fucking product lines and his night club, he has his logo tattooed on his back and a lame Faux Hawk like the kids who rock his shit, so he’s keepin’ it real with some decent pussy on his arm, so maybe being a cheesy asshole, not an actual cheesy asshole, like when she doesn’t wash.

Posted in:Asshole|Christian Audigier

2009

21

May

Kara Dioguardi Bikini Stunt of the Day

Kara from American Idol is knows for writing really garbage pop songs that outsell actual good music numerous times over. She’s constantly annoyed me throughout the season of American Idol when I accidentally end up watching it because Ryan Seacrest gives me unhealthy boners. Mainly because she’s a horny fucking cougar on the prowl, ready to eat up any pussy that stands between her and the cock, and last night she tried to put her money where her mouth (that has seen many cock) is and sang her ass off and flashed her bikini body to let the bikini girl know she’s still got it. It was a weird fuckin scene, but I never complain when desperate rich sluts feel insecure, it usually means increased probability that I won’t be cummin’ alone when the lights in the bar turn on. Good times.

Here’s the video….

Posted in:Bikini|Kara Dioguardi

2009

20

May

stepLINKS of the Day

You know how I bitch about my wife always wanting to have sex with me and how it makes me sick to my fucking stomach and I tell her to fuck off with her fat dirty vagina, but fuck her anyway, well 6 or 7 weeks ago, I guess she got the hint and stopped coming onto me. So days turned into weeks I was pretty happy about it. I was thinking how amazing it was to get her off my fucking jock because she’s disgusting, that was until earlier today when I decided it was time to get laid and bitch got her fucking revenge, see I cracked because I was hurting for pussy hard and she knew it and just looked at me, smiled and told me to fuck myself with my useless cock.

That said, tonight I go cheat, but before I do, here are my stepLINKS.

Find the Girl You’ve Always Wanted
Ot At Least One You Can Jerk Off To
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Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
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If You Thought Snuggies Were Bad….
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The 9 Hottest German Woman
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When 2 Nerds Battle
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Gisele Bundchen Bikini Showdown
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Who Knew Basketball Could Be so Awesome
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Who the Fuck is Marion Cotillard And Why Can’t I Find Nudes of Her?
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Use This To Get Sex..Because Sex is Fun
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Christian Bale’s Doodles On The Set Of Terminator Salvation
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E-Reading Just Got a Hell of a Lot More Easier
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When a Cute, Sexy Girl Gets a Pedicure…
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Striptease of the Day
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I Love Miranda Kerr and Her Pointy Tits
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Kate Gosselin Will Eat Your Children!
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Rhianna Was Getting Down at the Strip Club in NYC and Loving Every Minute Of It
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Hayden Panettiere Panty Upskirt
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Beyonce Looks Best When She Doesn’t Have Her Tranny Garb On
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Mariah Carey May Not Look 40, But I’m Sure Her Vagina Looks 60
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Okay, Paris Hilton’s Stupidity Just Reached It’s Highest Level Ever
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Eliza Dushku in Maxim
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Lexi is Luscious
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Angelina Jolie is Lookin Hot at Cannes
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Britney Spears Concert Brawl
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Sandra Shine is Gorgeous
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Oil Tanker Explodes – VIDEO
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Nice One, You Fucking Douche
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If This is True, Someone Kill Me Right God Damn Now
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Lucy Pinder Wants to Servce You Ice Cream
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MICHAEL JACKSON JESUS CHRIST!
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Kerin’s Body is to Die For
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Corin and Her T-Shirt Ain’t Half Bad
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I Want to Learn a Whole Lot More About Brenda Song
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Find Girls to Fuck – Because Sex is a Two Person Activity
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Jenna Presley Takes is Off
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Ryan Philippe is a Pimp, Yo
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SEIXE THE TESTICLES!
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Girls Gone Wild, World War 2
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Quentina Tarantina Basically Drugged Brad Pitt to Convince Him to Do His Movie
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Cute Redhead Has Alone Time
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Bikini Girl Has Talent
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Ursula Vargues is a Great Way to End the Day
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Posted in:stepLINKS

2009

20

May

Adriana Lima and Her Nipples of the Day

These pictures of Adriana Lima are doing the rounds and no one seems to know when they are from and I guess who really cares. They are Adriana Lima’s fucking nipples and she’s probably the hottest thing out of Victoria’s Secret since that bra and pantyset I bought myself for “halloween” last July. What used to make Lima even hotter than being hot was the fact that she was a good catholic virgin, unfortunately that fantasy’s been destroyed because she’s supposed to be married and pregnant, but that’s okay, because virginity just means blood, discomfort and bad sex. The only real good thing about virgins is that you can’t get Aids from them, unless they’ve had blood transfusions or done anal with faggots or blacks.

Speaking of Aids, I was talking to this girl the other night who asked me what my parents did, since I don’t have parents, I had to be creative about the lie, something I’ve been doing for a long time and I am good at, so I told her that my family invented the condom and I come from a long line of condom people and she made some comment about how I have no excuse but to have safe sex or something implying that I use condoms and I didn’t want to give her the wrong idea and think I was one of those prudes, because I’m not.

So I went on a rant about being a self-hating heir to the condom empire and everytime I fuck I make sure to not use condoms while screaming “Fuck you dad for ruining my life” like some kind of spoiled brat, only to proudly disply my herpes scab at Christmas fucking dinner so that he fucking knows.

She thought I was weird. So it may be a bad approach, but here’s Lima nipple to forget my story and move on with your life…

Posted in:Adriana Lima|Nipples

2009

20

May

Jennifer Love Hewitt and Mini Skirt of the Day

When Love Hewitt was in her last relationship she let herself go. She’d go out in public in period stained sweat pants. She’d eat and eat and fucking eat until those very same period stained sweat pants didn’t fit anymore and she was pretty much disgusting to look at, but like any good break-up bitch got her shit together, and any new budding love affair, bitch started fuckin’ again, and now she’s out in boots and a mini skirt like some kind of whore, because I guess he is one in the bedroom for that dude from the movie Scream.

So to all the girlfriends who would refuse to fuck me, here’s your proof that fuckin’ a loser can do some good for you.

Posted in:Fuck Me Boots|Jennifer Love Hewitt

2009

20

May

Lindsay Lohan and Her Underwear Brim of the Day

Lindsay Lohan is my seems like a sweet girl who is just misunderstood. People just like pickin’ on her because of rumors of her taking multiple men into the bathroom at clubs and parties, or because she’s rumored to be the washed up den mother who pounces at any new cock in the industry, only to get rejected, because she’s a liability and no one wants to touch her for various reasons. Like studios can’t get movies insured, actors don’t want to be associated with her crazy and she is rumored to be a paparazzi whore, who is always in the media because she tips the fuckers off to not be forgotten. But she’s still Lindsay fucking Lohan and here she is showing off her lesbian underwear waist-band that I’m not convinced is so lesbian but I am convinced would be pretty spicy to suck on and wrap around my flacid dick in some kind of panty fetish porn scene starring me.

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|Underwear

2009

20

May

Jessica Sutta’s Tits in Australia of the Day

Here’s a Pussycat Doll, her name is Jessica Sutta and she’s arriving in Sydney for whatever award show is going down there. You may want to google it, since Australia award shows are your fuckin’ passion, but I’m not going to bother because I am lazy and figure if the Pussycat Dolls are there, I don’t really want to be.

She’s wearing some kind of sticker bra/pasties shit which makes no sense because she’s got implants and implants are the 5000 dollar bra that will save you money on bras pretty much paying for themself in the long run, I guess the only explanation is that she’s a cockteasin’ cunt.

Posted in:Jessica Sutta|Tits

2009

20

May

Brooke Hogan’s Official Music Video of the Day

I know you’ve all be excited for the fat version of Paris Hilton to release the new video of her new single called Falling and it’s about falling for a guy, falling in love, and she rocks her flat ass and broad shoulders out in a bikini while some weird lookin’ black or white guy that I guess she found at some orphanage because he looks like the kind of guy who’s parents would leave him on the fuckin’ doorstep after seeing his crooked face raps over her shit.

Now I may not be a music producer, but I don’t know how anyone can listen this and think “Shit, that’s a wrap, we’ve got gold” because everything from the beat to the lyrics to the fuckin singing to the rapping to the fuckin video is a piece of fuckin’ shit and I can only assume it was her birthday gift from her dad, because otherwise I have no faith in America.

Posted in:Brooke Hogan|Music Video