I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2009

25

Feb

Michael Phelps’ Montreal Girlfriend of the Day

I was eating a sandwich the other day and overheard the staff of the sandwich place talking about how Michael Phelps was there over the weekend with some local chick he’s dating. I started casually asking some people I know about it, not because I care, but because I wanted to know who would see past that dude’s mangled face for the American hero with fish-like stamina he is, because I had a feeling pretty much any girl would see past his mangled face to get with America’s boy wonder.

Some dude I know, claims he knows the girl, he told me they met in Florida but didn’t know if they were serious or not, he didn’t even know if they were fucking or not, but as far as I’m concerned, if you’re flying into Montreal during the winter for a girl, when you have the option of pretty much every girl out there, shit’s probably pretty serious or at least pretty fuckin’ good.

Here are some pictures that may be of her, that are ripped off her Facebook. I don’t even know her name, so they really could be anyone, or at least someone who worked her way into hanging with T.I., Young Jeezy, and Phelps. Probably making it the best vacation ever!

Let’s just hope she doesn’t get soft and trust him too much. You know, believe the lies he tells her about being the one and their future life of luxury, you know blinding her from getting some some artistic nudes of him that she can use for blackmail down the road after he cheats on her, because you never let a hope and fantasy of what you wish will happen, make you turn your back on opportunity that presents itself today. At least that’s why my grandmother always told me along with other life lessons like “never suck dick for free” and “condoms are for pussies” and most importantly…I never had a grandmother, but you get what I’m saying. Right?

Posted in:Girlfriend|Michael Phelps

2009

25

Feb

Octomom Porno Could Be in the Near Future of the Day

In Vivid overload for the day, you know since I just posted that Meggan Malone video she made for me and plugged their show and movies because I felt it would increase my chances of marrying her, I got this in my inbox….

Vivid is custom-developing a script for Nadya Suleman called Octopussy. “It would feature Nadya and eight men,” he said. “We have confirmed that she has seen our offer and are waiting to hear back from her. For one million dollars we expect 88 minutes of full hardcore sex.” Then he added, “With her lips she would have been perfect to star in Vivid’s new reality show Deeper Throat.” Source

Here’s the official press release….

VIVID ENTERTAINMENT OFFERS MOTHER OF OCTUPLETS UP TO $1-MILLION PLUS HEALTH INSURANCE TO MAKE A MOVIE

LOS ANGELES – (February 25, 2009) – Nadya Suleman, the controversial mom who made history after giving birth to octuplets, is being offered a deal of up to $1-million plus a year of health insurance for her family to make a movie with Vivid Entertainment, the world’s leading adult film company.

“Nadya obviously needs income to assure that her children are secure so we are offering her up to $1-million to act in one movie,” said Steven Hirsch co-chairman of Vivid. “We’ve had many single mothers work with us over the years and their income from Vivid has been very important to them. We would schedule production so that the movie could be shot in less than one week.”

According to recent reports Nadya’s PR agency has stopped representing her, a book agent decided not to handle her story and she’s being derided by ordinary citizens who say that taxpayers will wind up paying her hospital tab and future expenses.

“There is a tremendous amount of interest in Nadya and we can help her capitalize on that interest and put some real cash in her bank account,” said Mr. Hirsch. As with our Vivid Girls, she would have her choice of partners, including ‘Octodad.'”

Mr. Hirsch said a movie staring Nadya would be distributed under the Vivid-Celeb imprint. Vivid-Celeb has released titles starring Pamela Anderson, Kim Kardashian and most recently, former Miss USA Kelli McCarty, who chose the studio to make her transition from NBC daytime star to hardcore porn star with “Faithless,” which has become a top seller since its debut on February 4th.

Now, I get why running after some disgusting mentally unstable girl, attention craving, disaster of a person, who is all over the fucking news makes sense, but the idea of 8 dicks inside one vagina, is kinda fucking gay, even if her vagina is a cavernous hole that can fit it. The thought of what this stretched out pig of a woman who needs to be institutionalized makes me fucking sick, yet intrigued and I hope she bites because we already know she’s a slut and one million dollars will buy a lot of formula for a lot of babies..

Posted in:Octomom|Octopussy|Porno

2009

25

Feb

America Ferrera Reunited with Her Family of the Day

I get very little satisfaction ripping into someone who plays someone ugly on TV. It’s like she already knows that shit and made a career exploiting it, so me doing this is just beating a dead fucking horse…or should I saw dog….

Here are some pictures of America Ferrera being reunited with her long lost family. I heard back in Mexico, her father was shot while looking through a dumpster for food to feed the family and her mother died of rabies, forcing Ferrara to fend for her brother and sister to survive. They went from town to town, people violated her, one drunk guy even fucked her behind some bar, but one day, she randomly got approached by four white people with nets and hooks and shit, she snarled at them, but they persisted to scoop her up and throw her in the back of a van, and after a quarantine, a series of shots, a nice southern California family adopted her. Shaved her and groomed her and fed her the best kibble around, giving her the opportunity to get on TV, starting as a stunt dog and ending up winning a fucking emmy. A rags to riches story, but for the person who seemingly had everything, one thing was unresolved…her brother and sister she vowed to care for were left behind, so with her Hollywood TV star money, she hired a team of people to find them and finally, after many years, they were brought back together. I think my eyes are starting to well up. Yep. That’s a tear. Wow, what a touching rags to riches story….

Posted in:America Ferrera|Ugly

2009

25

Feb

Meggan Malone Teaches You How To Throw The Dice of the Day

I don’t know if you remember an amazing moment in this site’s history, when Vivid contract girl, Meggan Malone taught you how to dance , but she I do. I watch that shit on repeat, over and over, almost on a nightly basis because she says the site’s name in it. That means she knows I exist and that’s better than any porn she’s done.

Well, she’s back, and she brought her amazing fucking ass to the internet today and lucky for me, she said my site name as she throws the dice and that works for me …

If you want to see more of my internet girlfriend in action, you know, when she’s not staying up into all hours of the night having cyber sex with me and typing my site URL over and over again, she’s in the “Deeper Throat” TV series on Showtime Saturday nights at 11:30pm or in an actual porn movie called “Strictly Conversation” available at Vivid .

Posted in:Meggan Malone|stepTV|Throwing Dice

2009

25

Feb

Sam Ronson And Her Lesbian Acoustic Performance of the Day

I saw some paparazzi pictures of Lindsay Lohan following Sam Ronson and her acoustic guitar around for some performance in Vegas yesterday, and I thought that just what the world needs is another lesbian with another acoustic guitar to sing songs that are inspired by the day they got raped and/or molested and/or trying to stay trendy by hating dick. Here’s the video, it’s too bad she didn’t get Lohan to do her back-up dancing. Sounds like there were a solid 5 people in the audience….love how the asshole she’s with talks politics, that’s just what I want when I am there to cry to lesbians who have been wronged in their spoiled, connected, rich girl lives.

Posted in:Acoustic|Sam Ronson

2009

25

Feb

stepLINKS of the Day

I got this email today…

I think I’m supposed to hate you because of feminism and all that shit, but I can’t bring myself to do it. I love your site. Love it. My husband doesn’t get it, and thinks that I’m a big fat lesbian now, but whatev. Humor seems to escape him most days.

Thanks for all the laughs,

So someone with a vagina appreciates what I do. Take that all you haters and by all you haters I mean my one hater and that person is me.

Here are my links….

Because a Live Show is the Only Way to Go
GO

Megan Fox’s Tits and Vagina Are Officially Available for Public Pillaging
GO

Close Ups Of Adriana Lima’s Tits
GO

Some Snobby French Squirrel Goin Nuts
GO

Which Oscar Hottie Would You Stick Your 2 Inch Peen Into?
GO

The Lost Ending to Back to the Future. And No, Doc and Marty Don’t Go Homo For Each Other
GO

Kevin Garnett Will Shut You Down!
GO

I Can Think of Many Places For Eliza Dushku to Stick Her Alien Tongue
GO

Farewell to Thee, A-Rod. Hope the performance Enhancement and Shrunken Penis Was Worth It
GO

Because You Need the Tools of the Trade to Do a Job Right
GO

Mike DeStefano is a Future Black Man
GO

Denise Milani Does What She Does Best
GO

The Octomommy’s 15 Minutes of Crazy Continues to Reach New Levels of Insanity
GO

So THAT’S What God Was Thinking When He Created Man
GO

Sophie Monk Was Gracious Enough to Put Her Nipples On Display
GO

Brooke Hogan’s Thong Slip Stirs Images of the Cock She is Hiding Up Front
GO

Taylor Momsen is Kind of Hot, If Your into the Try-Hard-Junkie-Jailbait Type Thing
GO

David Beckham Sells viagra in China, Probably Because Sleeping Next to Posh Makes His Penis Shrivel
GO

Rachel Bilson is Sporty Cute Casual as Usual
GO

Find the Whore You’re Looking For
GO

Evan Rachel Wood’s Vagina Can’t Stay Away From Marilyn Mansons
GO

If eHarmony Worked for Kim Jong Il, It Can Work for Even You
GO

Some Mardi Gras Video Amazingness You Will Never Experience Firsthand
GO

Anyone Who Rides a Scooter Deserves to Be Humiliated Anyways
GO

Port-O-Potty Running Mans
GO

Lindsay Marie is Lovely
GO

I Don’t Know What a Wiffle Ball Is, But Hitting Someone in the Nuts With One Looks Fun
GO

Riley Chase Brings Tuesday Good Times
GO

Wentworth Miller Can Suck My Balls. This is a REAL Prison Break
GO

You May Wanna Think Twice About Eating That Candy Bar
GO

Pheobe Price is So Disgusting. Seriously, Why is This Bitch Famous?
GO

Jorgie Porter is Wearing Nothing But Panties
GO

Because the Best Stories Don’t Actually Need a Storyline
GO

You Must Take a Look at Bridget
GO

Avril Lavigne Promos Her Stupid Piece of Shit Clothing Lines
GO

Miranda Kerr and Her Hot Legs Go Down Under
GO

Cassandra is Taking It All Off
GO

Charles Barkley is Going to Jail
GO

9-1-1 FAIL
GO

Itty Bitty Titty Tuesday
GO

Is Beyonce Made of Plastic?
GO

A Mardi Gras Gallery from Today
GO

The Kardashian’s Talking About their Bed Chimp
GO

Weird Immigrant Music Video with Girl Asses….That is Supposed to Be Funny…
GO

Naked Chicks With Kicks
GO

Shia Labeouf is a Little Pussy Faggot…He Hates The World Because It Hurts Too Much to Take Dick or some shit…
GO

The Hottest Lady Gaga Video Ever
GO

The Trailer for the Amazing Short Movie Called Boob.
GO

See What Some Clothed People Look Like Naked….
GO

Dorito Pussy
GO

Rogue Collector’s Photobucket Finds

Some Girl Grabs Her Bare Pussy and Shows Off Her Tits
GO

Some Ridiculous Porn Clips I’ve Come Across

Girl Fucking While Her Deaf/Mute Dad is in the Room
GO

Plump Granny Seduces Boy
GO

How To Ruin Your Own Sex Tape
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS

2009

24

Feb

Lily Allen is Furry Fetishist of the Day


Lily Allen finally found a community that would accept her as a sex object and that is the Furries/Plushies mainly because it covers up her fat body.

In my defense for always calling her out for being fucking ugly, fat and unappealing, the Furries/Plushies community is pretty easy to be desirable in, because it’s one of those things that not that many people are into or even know about, and because it is weird. It’s not the kind of fetish you try out with a girl bring the girl home from the club, because trying to get her into a mascot costume to rub up against her doesn’t always go over well.

Maybe this is just therapy for the loss of her child, you know dressing up like the toys she should be playing with and picking up off the nursery floor. Fucking hippies…

Either way, Lily Allen looks better than ever in this shit, because she’s always had a body that needed to be covered up.. or left in the barn….

Here are some pictures of the Furry Convention because it’s more interesting that Lily Allen
GO

Posted in:Asshole|Lily Allen

2009

24

Feb

Lindsay Lohan Get McDonald’s of the Day

Lindsay Lohan addressed concerns the public has because those topless pics I posted yesterday surfaced and she looks like death. Her people needed to do damage contro, so they sent her to pretend to get McDonald’s, because nothing says I am not a coked up, self destructive, girl with an eating disorder like pretending to eat the shittiest quality food out there. Good example for the kids, you cunt, I’d say you’re really the right thing to look up to, but remembered thatkids know who Lohan is anymore, she’s just a nobody. She deserves some love for this shitty performance.

The real confusing thing in all this is that asian/mexican/ethnic of somesort guy who sneaks out from behind the gate. Is he their laborer, is he their drug dealer, is her lohan’s sex slave she bought off some seedy website. I guess we’ll never know, because they’ll kill him before they let him open his mouth. That’s just how psycho’s do things.

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|McDonalds

2009

24

Feb

Christina Milian in King Magazine of the Day

Christina Milian King Magazine photoshoot

I have loved Christina Milian since seeing her get covered in mud like a dirty little whorein her one hit wonder album a few years back that I assume she’s trying to recreate. I assume she’s been dropped by her original label and that is why she’s been laying low but after deciding to go with myspace records, she’s recorded an album and now she’s doing her promotional rounds.

She ended up on the cover of King Magazine because I guess she’s black or appeals to black people and by black people I mean white suburban kids who buy magazines they think are for black people so they can act more black and garner some street cred, while real black people are too busy being gangsters, rappers or reading Fortune to bother picking shit up.

On a side note, I fell in love with a black girl last night, it was at the movies, she was tall and luxurious, I tried making eye contact, until her hoodrat boyfriend came and I felt it was better to not get shot.

Here is Milian doing her King Magazine thing…

Here’s her music Video I’ve Posted Before….

Us Against The World – Official Music Video

Posted in:Christina Milian|King|Photoshoot

2009

24

Feb

Jessica Alba Pretends to Like her Kid of the Day

Here’s some Jessica Alba staged pictures of her and her kid playing and like she’s the love of her life, because of the negative press she’s recently got from me about how she wants nothing to do with her kid, not even breast feed it. Well I don’t buy this shit, you’re an actor and everything you do is a lie, a very bad actor and this is bullshit.

As soon as they got home she locked the kid in the soundproof room in the basement where she keeps him so he doesn’t bother her. She has some immigrant women care for him between days her and her publicist agree she should bring him out to light and pretend to be having the time of her fucking life being a “mom” photo opportunity.

Posted in:Fake|Jessica Alba|Kid