I have a feeling she is making this face because shejust felt her busted up uterus slipping out of her skirt because she didn’t wear underwear again, but I guess she could be making this face because she’s scared, or sad, or concerned or even surprised. Maybe it’s got to do with her dying career, beauty or sex appeal….or maybe someone just flashed her the 8 ball of coke she’s about to dig her whore face in, or maybe a guy she once banged just told her he has AIDS and has to tell past lovers by law. I really don’t know or care but someone emailed it to me and I figured I’d switch it up by posting it anyway because I have nothing better to do and no matter how hard I try to go back to sleep and no matter how tired I am right now, the alcohol withdrawal isn’t letting me. Asshole.
Hey guess what, Hayden Panettiere’s got shitty tits. I have more luscious cleavage you’d want to burry your head in, but then again I am clinically and legally obese, so I have bigger tits that most women.
The good news is that if she was to do porn she’d make more per scene because the companies love natural tits since most girls willing to do porn have already jacked their shit up. The bad news is that Hayden thinks she’s too good for porn and sticks to garbage TV shows no one watches, and by no one I mean everyone, you assholes are giving her this uncontrollable, undeserved ego.
Not to beat a dead horse with my dick or anything, but I am still very excited about this strap-on, but in talking to my new best friend on facebook, I realized something.
This one sex toy company is the only people who ever send me anything, I always assumed it was to review their product, but realized that last month they sent me a prostate massager and now they’ve sent me a strap on. I think they are telling me to fuck myself in some weird sex toy company passive aggressive way. I still think I’ve come out on top.
Maggie Gyllenhaal is a fucking monster. I’ve seen a few of her movies and sure seeing her piss herself in secretary was alright, but you know with a face like that, the only way to get the fuck ahead is to do things that normal hot chicks wouldn’t bother with.
That said, this is a video of her getting strip searched, in a movie called Strip Search, that came out in 2004. It was sent to me today, so I guess it’s making it’s rounds and since staying as far from Gyllenhaal as I can, because she scares me, it’s new to me.
The point of all this is to say, you don’t need to look good to get naked because watching her get felt up and cavity searched unwillingly, then curl in a ball and cry about it before throwing a tantrum because part of her felt violated and the other part of her appreciate the male attention is amazing even if it is from 2004.
I saw this video of Sylvester Stallone and I am posting it because I love seeing these celebrities interact with the scum that fill the street. Sure, I am borderline homeless and begging on the street, but I think that just puts me in a better position to say that we’re fucking scum. They are addicts, they are mental patients who aren’t getting treatment, they are people who just don’t fit into the mold of society because they do things like ask elderly women if their pussies are still juicy and who get mad when you don’t give them money, even though they did absolutely nothing for you, but make you clench your purse in fear, if you know what I mean.
I just like when dudes in their 200,000 dollar cars come in contact with them and get stuck in conversation with them, because like Sylvestor Stallone I’ve engaged in homeless conversation and it’s always been fucking entertaining, but I’ve always given them more than a dollar after they tell me they love me when I’m finished climaxing all over their faces. It’s just common courtesy, sure they’re desperate and hungry and dying for their next fix, but they are people too.
The day you start caring about what a girl you’ve never met does to her hair is the day you have to come to terms with the fact that you are really fucking strange. Lucky for you, today is that day, so now that we’ve recognized the problem, you can start working on fixing it.
Sure, I am the kind of guy who doesn’t notice when my own wife gets her hair done, even if she changes the fucking color, sure, I never look at my wife or listen to her when she talks, but I can still stand back and say that just because you are a die hard fan of a girl’s tits, or maybe a little obsessed with a girl making everyone around you feel a little uncomfortable, the second you start talking about what look you like best on her, you’ve gone into the realm of creepy. Sure, you’ve spent many afternoons jerking off to her, but that doesn’t mean you have a fucking connection with her, so be a fucking man or enter hair dressing school, because somethin’s not right here and I’m gonna go with…you.
You probably all know this Bethany Hamilton chick, she was a pro surfer who got eaten by a shark when she was 14 and just getting into the pro scene. She ended up losing an arm, making double handjobs pretty impossible, but she kept at surfing and is an inspiration to us all that no matter what is thrown in our path, we have to overcome, but more importantly to the lazy amputees you see around who feel sorry for themselves and smoke pot all day while jacked on prescription pills because they can’t feel things for themselves anymore since they have no limbs.
I am posting these because she’s posing with ass and not because I’m into rubbing my dick up on stumps like that weird guy I wrote about a few weeks ago, not that I am disgusted by her condition at all, but I just don’t think it makes her hotter than if she had a couple arms. Ya know.
You all know that Christian Bale had a freak out the other day on set, it’s been all over the place and I don’t even own a TV and know about it, so I figure you’ve all heard it. Anyway,if you haven’t because if I didn’t have this site, I probably wouldn’t have heart it either, he went insane on some dude who was working on set because he ruined a shot and Bale is a diva and doesn’t know how to treat people with respect. I don’t care who was in the wrong or how important Bale thinks he is because he’s some big star who was in the zone and got thrown out of character or was in character which I assume will be his excuse, you still have a responsibility to not be a little pussy cry baby.
Someone remixed the tantrum and I figured I’d post it because it makes for an easy post and I am lazy. Sure the song is nothing I’d listen to, and sure it’s just some guy trying to be famous, who spent the night editing this shit up, but that’s a lot more effort than I’ve ever putt into anything, so why not give him a little exposure, since that’s what he wants, since there are thousands of other things I am sure people would want to hear sampled.
I am not one of those people who really hates cops. I get that they have a relatively hard job waiting around in their cars all day for people to fuck up, run a stop sign, speed or even tend to important issues like giving tickets for throwing your cigarette butts on the street, jay walking and telling you there’s nothing you can do when you get your laptop stolen at a Starbucks 4 years ago, even though the whole thing was under video surveillance but that would mean actually working. Sure there’s the occasional rape, murder, drug shake down and the whole pulling over black people in nice cars, when they aren’t pretending to work by cruising around all night and walking into stripclubs to check if the girls are 18. You know especially when they confiscate the drugs and drug money, make the girls who are under 18 suck them off to get off, or doing other dirty things like breaking gambling machines and stealing the cash. It’s a fucking joke that the public puts their trust into high school graduates who feel underpaid and who abuse their power because power is the whole reason they became cops, so whenever videos of them doing bad things like beating up homeless people, throwing a dude out of his wheelchair or ripping off bars hit, I feel a need to post the shit to show you how crazy our society is. Enjoy.
I remember being told that girls who smoke have smellier pussies than girls who don’t smoke. I remember being told that girls who smoke have greyer and dryer pussies than girls who smoke. I figure that since Katherine Heigl is constantly smokin’, her pussy is so choked out that shit has a potty smelling cough of it’s own.
Now I’ve never done any research on these claims, I have never really cared because there is no pussy too smelly, too grey, too lifeless for me to have my way with, but I figure if it is true, the anti smoking coalitions may want to take this angle instead of the whole lung cancer thing, because pussy condition is something girls will take seriously, since no one wants to be the girl with the stinky, dead, grey cunt, except for Katherine Heigl, but by the looks of her, I figure that’s the least of her concerns because she’s fat and already married, so it’s just one of the many signs of giving up, and giving her husband more reason to cheat on her.
