DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2021

30

Aug

The Bille Eilish Bounce of the Day

Billie Eilish is one of the most famous singers/popstars/musical acts out there.

I’ve never heard any of her songs and I like to think I am better for it.

Since I don’t listen to the radio and only stream movies when I am wasted…they can’t penetrate my brain with their mind controlling radio waves that have been designed to make me CONSUME whatever they are selling me…you know that’s how the media and big business work…ROOK US IN subliminally….I’ve seen those investigative journalism reports on how Disney writes “SEX” in the clouds in the kids movies…I’ve also seen Josie and the Pussy Cats…SHOUT OUT TARA REID for showing us how the entertainment industry works with their sophisticated technologies and DEEP pockets…

SO yeah, only know that Billie Eilish is famous, don’t know if she deserves that fame according to my professionally trained fame determining mind, you know the industry ALWAYS(never) asks me my opinion on their future planted stars….because whether I think she deserves fame or not, she’s got it, so my opinion doesn’t matter…

I’m just here for the fat girl titty bounce.

Posted in:Uncategorized

2021

30

Aug

Medical Worker Monday of the Day

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I remember about a year ago, the Medical Workers were being praised as heroes, you know possibly part of a marketing campaign, which I called out about a year ago, that involves the very simple idea of giving people recognition and they’ll go along with whatever they are told.

It’s like how could you say “Covid’s not bad” when society is expecting you to say HOW bad it actually is…and maybe it IS bad, I don’t fucking know, I’m not a medical worker, I just know if I wanted a medical worker to say how bad it was, I’d make sure that they were being treated like they matter, like they are important, like we can’t live without them…because we probably can’t…I mean the Robots aren’t built yet…

As the year went on, the parades and honking and signs about “FRONTLINE HEROES” were replaced with lay offs, gag orders, social media censorship but MOST IMPORTANTLY….mandated vaccines….

So these heroes, who survived covid for a year and a half, that don’t want a vaccine, are now being thrown to the fucking curb….no longer heroes, just dissenters not DOING what they are told…

Luckily, some saw the signs and they opened up their eyes, they saw the sign….and launched a subscription site, sold nudes and at the time I thought it was in bad taste but now REALIZE that they truly are Health Care Heroes…cuz I get to see them be slutty.

SO support your healthcare workers, listen to them, tip them…they are key people, with know how and tits.

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Posted in:NURSES

2021

30

Aug

Lorena Rae Bikini of the Day

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Lorena Rae is a German, potentially of Nazi origins, not because she’s a Nazi, but at 28 years old, her grandparents could have been, I mean people sort of just signed onto the propaganda they were being pushed, before it was too late to really escape what was happening, but LUCKILY that can’t happen again, it won’t happen again, that’s just shit that goes on in the 1930s, not the years building up to 2030…OBVIOUSLY..

SO YEAH, GERMAN, possible another Eugenics winner, like Heidi Klum, but only time will prove that for sure, not that we have time on our side, but we’ll see what happens….also a VS girl like Klum….you know gotta represent the german titties in their marketing efforts for inclusivity….they can’t all be Brazilian, Swedish, Portuguese and maybe one or two americans, you need that Aryan blood….

She is probably more famous for fucking Leo DiCaprio for a year in 2017-2018, but I think he’s just a Victoria’s Secret shareholder and he does it for the marketing and branding, since everyone’s told me he’s a gay with a guy named Lukas…or maybe it’s Lucas…but even a gay may want to get his dick wet from a VS model everyonce in a while…I mean why not, she’s a babe.

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Posted in:Lorena Rae

2021

30

Aug

Padma Lakshmi Bikini of the Day

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Padma Lakshmi is in a fringed bikini despite being an old bitch who shouldn’t be in a bikini, but at least she’s got fringe on it to cover up the old ass not that we can see her old ass in this curated, photoshopped and manipulated selfie that she posted for attention….THAT IS WHY LADIES POST BIKINI SELFIES…to show off, to get jerked off to, to brag or get feedback…to lure in more billionaires in their 80s, despite her already doing that hustle, back when she wasn’t pushing 80….in fact she had two billionaires thinking her pregnancy was theirs, one who ended up dying of cancer before realizing he was swindled, only to leave the kid, who turned out to not be his, the family fortune…while going to the other billionaire and saying “pay up”….we call it a masterful double dip, one far more confusing than it should be cuz she’s not that hot, but clearly, she knows how to trick, seduce and manipulate rich men….

All this to say, old moms in bikinis being rich..mainly due to her vagina’s ability to kegel the cash out of the ATM…from the private banks the only cock she lets in her do their banking…

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Posted in:Padma Lakshmi

2021

30

Aug

Milf Monday of the Day

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The beauty that is childbirth, is not really a beauty that I’ve ever seen, I find the whole thing creepy an weird, and not because I am some 40 year old Sex in the City influenced career oriented person, trying to have some cosmopolitan life, where kids just get in the way of that, leaving me some empty shell of a woman by 50, when I realize that money and things are empty as fuck, not how we are designed, and really just a flaw in society that has duped me into neglecting that maternal right my uterus gave me before it dried up….

I get that we are supposed to breed and it’s ok to want to breed….I prefer a mom to some bitchy career woman being all alpha male taking her business calls on her elliptical trainer at 5 am before heading into the office to be bossy and annoying…

I just think the baby in the womb, ripping through the cunt, is vile…and thus avoid the whole MILF thing, even if they are hot and don’t look ravaged, because they are damaged goods….but at the same time, I am a stepfather and a woman with her own kids is better than a woman with your kids, she’s got it out of her system…but it doesn’t mean they are hot…it means they are available cuz no one wants em…not even their previous baby daddies…

All this to say, this are some MILFs…which as an old fuck….is ok, since girls have kids by 30 and are MILFs by 30…if they don’t fall into the whole baby weight excuse of “blame the kids” so they can “eat the cake”….until they “die of diabetes”….

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Posted in:Milf

2021

30

Aug

Sarah Hyland Water Sex of the Day

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Sarah Hyland’s husband is the gayest motherfucker around….If that’s not some diddled dude in a boyband in 1998 getting shit on by a midget who has a giant fucking head I don’t know what he is….or maybe he’s some Puerto Rican twink that has sold his asshole to some old rich gay dude from the City, you know carted around like eye candy, either way…he freaks me the fuck out….but not as much as Sarah Hyland.

The funny thing is that I know their backstory, she’s Disney owned thanks to ABC, he was on Bachelor for ABC, they were linked up, and I guess he figured people are gay for pay, might as well be straight for pay…when you can find some kidney donor rich bitch with a limited life expectancy thanks to her kidney disease…which could be why she’s shitting on him….you know Kidney Failure, Kidney transplants, can add unnecessary pressure to her asshole….like she probably adds unnecessary pressure to his asshole…you know cuz he’s a queer.

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Posted in:Sarah Hyland

2021

30

Aug

Rowan Blanchard Wet of the Day

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Rowan Blanchard’s living like a commoner, not like a Disney Kid she is, all covered in squirt and taking the subway, like she’s just finished a shift working for rich guys in their hotel suite for a payment….

This is the equivalent of meeting a rich fuck in their airstream at the trailer park you live in cuz you can’t afford fucking rent on a house, only they are there to be hipsters and get the selfies by the campfire next to their curated patio lanterns, you know the type….when the trailer park dwellers just want to be left the fuck alone and now they have to deal with people drinking their craft cocktails and whatever other lame bullshit they do on their macrame swing….yes…I know what macrame is…I was alive in the 70s you dumb fucks…

Point of the story, wet tight dresses are nice on every body…I mean I know that when I hear a rain storm rolling in, I always head to the grocery store to see the wet braless taking refuge…soaking…in air conditioning…you get the deal.

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Posted in:Rowan Blanchard

2021

30

Aug

Charlotte Lawrence Got Them Tits On of the Day

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Charlotte Lawrence is a nice reminder that the rich are really heavily impacted by this whole COVID thing, that’s actually ruining small business and fucking with the lives of all the normals, while this one, a rich kid, who I’ll assume hasn’t made much money on her own, even with her family connections, because she hasn’t quite “Hit” yet…

The rich people travel to Europe, go to Fashion Week events, go to all the restaurants, because COVID doesn’t exist amongst those fuckers…

It’s the broke ass ghetto motherfuckers like us we have to suffer…

So if the whole quarantine camps happen, you know that none of these people will in them, but at least they’ll be out there living in a less populated world, documenting their empty existences with their tits out for us retards to look onto and say “why are we looking at this girl’s tits”…

CUZ HER MOM WAS ON DREW CAREY

That’s why…

Oh, and she pretends to do pop music no one hears….CUZ HER MOM WAS ON DREW CAREY….

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Posted in:charlotte lawrence

2021

30

Aug

Bella Hadid Braless of the Day

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I guess calling Bella Hadid a hack of a model is irrelevant, since she works as a model and gets paid a lot of fucking money for being a model, so what the fuck do I know about models, who deserves to be a model, and what makes a fucking model…

If you’re a brand paying a pile of shit to promote your product, that pile of shit is still a monetizing branded entity and THUS a model…that’s not to say Bella Hadid is a piece of shit, I was actually reference an ACTUAL pile of shit….

I just know that Bella Hadid’s career was bought by her dad, her sister’s success, and she just ran with it….

I also know that she’s had so many procedures done to look more like an instagram filter, and it’s unfortunate they’ll celebrate that to fuck with the young people they are trying to sell cosmetic procedures with…at least indirectly.

Let’s make everyone UGLIER than they are, even when they were born UGLIER at least they were real…now nothing is fucking real.

The good news is that the younger generation envy the pornostars, cuz that’s what the dudes are into watching, so all these “high brow” rich kids, who end up with legit careers, just porn themselves out, in a more luxurious way…so here’s some stripper gear, probably expensive stripper gear, with someone more fake than any stripper I’ve ever met, and those strippers don’t even use their real fucking names….

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Posted in:Bella Hadid

2021

30

Aug

Milky Boobs Monday of the Day

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It’s hard to hate on tits being tits, doing their natural function as tits, even if they are mom tits….squirting milk…..which is a reminder of breeding and I find breeding disgusting….because I am a firm believer that humans fucking suck…but that’s because they are idiots, puppets, shills, retards, scrambling like lemmings….

The fact is that humans are actually glorious designed machine that has this amazing and sophisticated system designed to KEEP us alive…and then we have this consciousness, that if we remember exists when we stop being distracted by the noise, the greed, the disgusting design of our society…

The problem is our brains, our ability to manipulate or be manipulated, the fact that we live off a money based society where for whatever reason people envy those with the money and wrongfully assuming they are better or deserve better.

So I may not like moms, breeders, or mom tits shooting out sour milk, I may find the whole birthing process alien, but at the same time I can say…that just proves my point…the human body is a crazy and amazing machine…

People just don’t respect the body, they pollute the body..through action and opening their damn mouths…

Even these girls making porn out of breast feeding, while campaigning to no sexualize tits, while sexualizing tits..is just evidence of how fucking crazy, inconsistent, opportunistic and disgusting we are.

I’ll STILL stare.

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Posted in:Lactating