SFW Archives - Page 1073 of 1169 Archive - DrunkenStepFather.com

2015

17

Sep

Miley Cyrus Instagram Pic of the DAy

Miley Cyrus is so hip…so cool…so tumblr fresh…even though any real hipster knows that having a tumblr is so mainstream, and being on instagram is so mainstream, it makes you look like your trying….way too hard….

It’s safe to say that Miley Cyrus….is a fucking phoney created by Disney…puppet of the media…But she’s naked…or naked enough…to matter…covered in white foam…like it was her new boyfriend Dane Cook…who most people know as the fucking worst…

This is all getting pretty boring…

Posted in:Miley Cyrus|SFW

2015

16

Sep

Ireland Baldwin Attention Seeking of the Day

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Ireland Baldwin is great.

She’s this big enough to be a model rich kid, with very famous parents, who can’t pull off being a model, yet so many other girls who aren’t tall, and who are as rich, but have less famous parents are pulling it off….

She’s been producing random internet social media content for a while now, it’s been semi-intelligent, sometimes misguided, sometimes pornographic…all crying to be noticed…

She was dating some surfer, where they played the cute surf couple, practically banging on instagram, until they broke up, she spiraled into lesbianism…then rehab..now she’s going to clubs like a club id in the 90s tranny…up on some Michael Alig shit…

The whole thing is perfect, uncomfortable, weird, but perfect…

I am a fan…too bad she’s blocked me on everything…I thought we were friends…but at least I can still stare at her big ass she wants everyone to see to stand out from the other tween rich kids she’s affiliated with…

Good times…I like where this is headed…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Ireland Baldwin|SFW

2015

16

Sep

Kylie Jenner Bathing Suit of the Day

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Kylie Jenner was in a pink bathing suit a few days ago….or weeks ago…probably around her birthday…and for some reason I just saw them now…and figured there is no real timeline needed to post bathing suit pics of Kylie Jenner and her weird, plastic surgery to look like a big booty video vixen, even though she’s the white Kardashian, in what I guess is some program they run out of their basement that makes them look like these off-white, porn face, puppets that lack any real beauty but sure as fuck use make-up to try…

I figured that since these are old, you’d want something recent, like yesterday’s new Snapchat empji animations I fucking hate…and a Kylie in her robe n bed, on her instagram devoted to her snapchats she downloads and re-uploads as part of her media scam to make the world think people care, and I guess they do….

So Here’s a little edit of Kylie’s Snapchat where she proves TYGA is her little bitch…cuz she owns him with her family money and young pussy…cuz no rapper ever lets rainbows in their motherfucking mouths…and her in robes after he reclaimed his masculinity with her 18 year old, probably not that fresh, cunt…

Posted in:Kylie Jenner|SFW

2015

16

Sep

Arianna Grande Side Tit of the Day

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Arianna Grande did some media tour to promote not hating America…but hating the obesity epidemic because she’s so skinny…or some bullshit I don’t follow because I am a grown man and try to focus on what is important…her little body…her whore reputation according to a pornstar I met who was fucking Arianna Grande’s ex Mac Miller…and who apparently claims she’s the worst form of evil..something I could agree with based on her music alone…not that she writes it…but she participates in it…and even if that pays a lot of money…for this conditioned puppet..it’s still the fucking worst…

So I’m glad she is with me on this whole “focus on the tit” thing…at least based on her outfit alone….because she’s showing off tit…I didn’t know she had…probably from eating all the donuts…

Here she is singing some bullshit for Fallon….as Britney Spears and Celine Dion….while Jimmy Fallon is overly excited by it like a nervous, annoying, full retard…

Posted in:Arianna Grande|SFW

2015

16

Sep

Amber Heard Teaching Her Mom of the Day

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Amber Heard telling her mom not to make eye contact with the media….makes for aa pretty funny video…for a lot of reasons, from her mom not having any clue how any of this works, because unlike most of the other girls, she didn’t whore out Amber Heard to get the family ahead, Amber Heard whored herself out…and it worked out pretty well..considering she’s married to Johnny Depp, a massive fucking star, rich as fuck..

She’s a babe, her mom seems nice, the kind of woman I’d want to eat cookies she baked out of, but I guess that’s not saying much, I am a fat man, I love cookies and would eat them out of anyone…

TO SEE SOME PICS OF AMBER HEARD LOOKING LIKE A HORSE FACE KILLER BUT STILL HOT ENOUGH TO HOMEWRECK AND SEDUCE A RICH OLD MAN CLICK HERE

Posted in:Amber Heard|SFW

2015

16

Sep

Rita Ora’s Ass of the Day

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Rita Ora’s marketing campaign has really been fucking the right people…and showing as much tit and ass as she can to get noticed…without looking overly desperate in attempts to replace Rihanna, by pretty much copying Rihanna, in what I would assume is an actual popstar beef, but I am too lazy to google whether Rihanna hates Rita Ora for cramping her style, or whether Rihanna loves Rita Ora, is the person behind Rita Ora after they met in Barbados on one of Rita Ora’s summer vacations with her sugar daddy, only to actually own 20% of Rita Ora, that she’ll use as a retirement plan when she gives up the music, despite begging for the world to please not stop the music…eventually, when you’re a lazy bitch and have 300 million dollars in the bank you gotta say, I’m in the mood to just kick back and relax, but it’s only smart to keep revenue coming by bitches trying to be you..

That said, Rita Ora is at fashion week, performing a lot, wearing big panties for her big ass in see through dresses…as so many girls are…it’s the style by Ora goes one step further with it…to get noticed…because she’s not compelling as an “artist” without it…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS OF HER ASS CLICK HERE

TO SEE HER PERFORMING AT FASHION WEEK CLICK HERE

Posted in:Rita Ora|SFW

2015

16

Sep

Miley Cyrus is Broken – X-Ray Porn of the Day

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OMG! OMG! Miley is injured, I sure hope she recovers from this most terrible thing that could possibly happen to a girl who is high all the time, and who probably fell down the stairs or some shit…

I guess it could also be a like, and she’s just implying that she’s injured, by posting an X-Ray on her instagram, as part of one of her TUMBLR INSPIRED art projects, because art doesn’t exist anymore, it’s just a series of idiots making silly memes and videos for their own social media accounts…you know commentary on how her soul feels thanks to selling herself to the devil at a young age…

Or maybe she’s actually hurt, with a minor hand injury, that as anyone who has fucked an amputee will tell you, won’t get in the way of handjobs on either girls or guys…not that Miley gives, she’s more of a taker, the spoiled lazy brats always are…

I am just disappointed she didn’t post the videos of her injured, crying…where is her full time cameraman we know she has when you need him…

Fuck X-Ray porn, I want Miley Crying porn…because I am disgusting…and crying girls have always been a fetish…

Posted in:Miley Cyrus|SFW

2015

16

Sep

Jessica Alba’s Workout Clothes Cameltoe of the Day

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This is less of a cameltoe and more of a pussy definition as it is squeezed into tight pants….

Something that I am humiliated I even know the difference of…

It’s like I’ve slowly morphed into the pathetic loser who hides behind a computer jerking off to this shit, when my intention in 2004 when I started, was to just make fun of all you celebrity fans and celebrities…and now I’ve become the guy at parties who knows who Miley fucks, and who Bella Thorne is, and what Jessica Alba’s hustle is…

It’s like I’ve polluted myself with nonsense I never cared about…

But I guess I’ve always cared about cameltoe and pussy definiton, I remember being in high school and this lunch monitor would always have the most insane cameltoe, it was a solid three to four fingers deep, which made sense, because she had 5 kids…and lived in a trailer park….back then we called int frontal wedgie and I’d eat my sandwich gagging all while rocking a boner staring at it as each lip moved independent of the other….

Memories…

That said, I hate defending Jessica Alba or the lies she perpetuates, but I’ll defend her vagina in this cameltoe situation because as a mom of two kids, you’d expect a way more intense pussy eating pants cameltoe…

Memories…

HEre’s ALBA walking in a dress CLICK HERE

Posted in:Jessica Alba|SFW

2015

16

Sep

Drew Barrymore’s New Face of the Day

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In case you were wondering…Drew Barrymore still has a face..

It’s just really fucking doughy, or maybe it’s botoxed and not doughy at all, but rather one hard, paralyzed, expressionless, pile of shit…

But that face is terrifying….

That’s not to say Drew Barrymore had a cute face really ever…I mean maybe in ET, but that was some “she’s a little kid, they are all cute enough, in a cabbage patch doll kind of way, until they grow up and become the monsters they are”….

Drew Barrymore just existed because her family was so deeply entrenched in Hollywood that she could have been an acid burned, arab wife, who didn’t cook dinner fast enough for her husband, and she’d still get cast..

Either way, Drew Barrymore doesn’t matter, she was never hot, she’s old news, and her face…is old too…but I felt compelled to post it because I can’t stop staring at it….

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Drew Barrymore|SFW

2015

16

Sep

The Worst Bella Thorne Sandwich of the Day

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Christina Hendricks and Cabbage Patch Doll the Adult Version Amy Schumer….made a Bella Thorne Sandwich, because it’s just like two overrated fat chicks to try to tag team the hot youth….in efforts to either make themselves look fatter, or make her look skinnier, in a sandwich I’d leave the bread on the plate, like a California carb-fearing wife, and focus on the meat…

That said, here’s her ass…17 years old for 2 more weeks ass…an ass that will look pretty much the same in 2 weeks, but that will far less scandalous, exciting, or bad to want to eat…so take it in now…your 17 year old fetish and perversion is in the grey area…still a sex offender if you fuck her in terms of the law, but easy to say to judging girls who aren’t 18 that you’re not a pervert, 2 weeks to 18 might is pretty much 18….an argument that you tried for a 16 year old you tried to bang…but that just made you look like a predator…

Posted in:Bella Thorne|NYFW|SFW

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